# British men! Honestly... **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [January 1, 2006, 1:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-men-honestly/337946 "2006-01-01T13:13:06Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![David\_Simmons](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9de053/32.png) [@David\_Simmons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/David_Simmons)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2006, 6:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-men-honestly/337946/21 "2006-01-02T18:37:32Z")
> [@conurepete](#): > > Try looking lost. I went to London last year, and was lost a lot of the time, and it seemed to draw men. Oh, that’s just the English. Just stand on the corner looking puzzled and someone is sure to come up and say, “Can I help you, Yank?” Then you will get some directions about going three turnings that way and two turnings this way and it’s on the second floor above the Chemist, ending with, “You cahn’t miss it, Yank.” ---
**Author:** ![Jennyrosity](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/2bfe46/32.png) [@Jennyrosity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jennyrosity)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2006, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-men-honestly/337946/22 "2006-01-02T20:06:04Z")
Two suggestions: 1. Get drunk with him. Nothing lowers a British guy’s inhibitions like 6 pints. 2. Take the piss. Brit guys love a woman they can banter with. ---
**Author:** ![Rayne\_Man](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/df705f/32.png) [@Rayne\_Man](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rayne_Man)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2006, 8:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-men-honestly/337946/23 "2006-01-02T20:21:44Z")
> [@Jennyrosity](#): > > Two suggestions: > > 1. Get drunk with him. Nothing lowers a British guy’s inhibitions like 6 pints. It’s not the only thing it lowers ! ---
**Author:** ![Jennyrosity](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/2bfe46/32.png) [@Jennyrosity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jennyrosity)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2006, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-men-honestly/337946/24 "2006-01-02T20:26:48Z")
> [@Rayne Man](#): > > It’s not the only thing it lowers ! Yeah, but if you want to get him past the stage where the best he can do is pull your hair and run away, it’s a necessary risk. ---
**Author:** ![Revenant\_Threshold](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f1d935/32.png) [@Revenant\_Threshold](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revenant_Threshold)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2006, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-men-honestly/337946/25 "2006-01-02T20:40:10Z")
> [@Jennyrosity](#): > > Two suggestions: > > 1. Get drunk with him. Nothing lowers a British guy’s inhibitions like 6 pints. As a Repressed British Guy ( a fellow Londoner, in fact) I assure you this will work. _Definetly_. And if you can drink six pints along with us, all the better! (Mental Note: Ask **Jennyrosity** out - free beer may ensue). > [@](#): > > 1. Take the piss. Brit guys love a woman they can banter with. Also a definite. And to translate to American, “take the piss” is to make fun of, insult (but in a friendly way). Banter is always fun, and it gives you a good glimpse into the personality of the other person, too. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2006, 10:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-men-honestly/337946/26 "2006-01-02T22:46:19Z")
I’ll toss in my vote for “hang in there.” When I was getting to know my now-husband, he sounded like he would rather do anything than talk to me on the phone. He kept calling me, though, so I figured he liked me, but he just wasn’t a phone guy, and it turns out that is exactly right. Three years into our marriage, we _still_ don’t talk on the phone well. My point? Oh yeah - give him at least one more try. My guess is that Canadians are halfway between British and American - more forthright than British, but not as in-yer-face as Americans, and it sounds like he is more subdued than most Brits. Get him comfortable; draw him out; build up his confidence in your affection, and you never know what might happen. In my opinion, the quiet ones are the prizes. Of course, if he still can’t make a decision to save his life after a couple of dates, I’d toss him back. That would get awful old awful quick to me. (I don’t care all that much for British accents. Scottish or Irish accents - _now_ we’re onto something! 😃 ) ---
**Author:** ![twopennorth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b9e5f3/32.png) [@twopennorth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twopennorth)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2006, 10:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-men-honestly/337946/27 "2006-01-02T22:49:46Z")
> [@Mr Jim](#): > > I went out on a first date tonight with a brit. We met online and I asked him out, fine. I ended up having to decide when and where cause he kept saying whenever was good for me. We ended up walking the streets of London for ages-with me picking the streets we walked down. I picked both pubs we stopped in and the restuarant. Finally at the end we got on the Tube…he sat opposite me and not beside me. Then he shook my hand instead of kissing me. I was like…ok can take a hint. I get home and I have a text from him. Something along the lines of “it was nice meeting you but if you’d rather not see me again I understand”. EH? I messaged back telling him I had no idea if he even had a good time since he was so reserved. He apologised and said he would like to see me again and then promised to be more decisive. Anyhoo…I’m just so tired of having to do all the work, not sure how long this will last but I’ll give him a chance. > > Gawd…he did have a sexy voice though…_sigh_ He likes you. This is an Englishman being polite and showing respect to a woman. I’d guess he was privately educated at a boys school, but I could be wrong. N.B I am female so it doesn’t make 100% sense to me, either. ---
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2006, 11:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-men-honestly/337946/28 "2006-01-02T23:32:44Z")
Whatever happens, please post about date #2…some of us need lives and would like to live (vicariously of course) yours for a bit. I am going to UK in March. It might be awkward to date, though-my husband and my kids will be with me (long story). Good luck! ---
**Author:** ![Jennyrosity](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/2bfe46/32.png) [@Jennyrosity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jennyrosity)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2006, 10:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-men-honestly/337946/29 "2006-01-03T10:07:31Z")
> [@featherlou](#): > > (I don’t care all that much for British accents. Scottish or Irish accents - _now_ we’re onto something! 😃 ) Then it’s English accents you don’t care for, perchance? ---
**Author:** ![Mordib](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c0e974/32.png) [@Mordib](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mordib)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2006, 10:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-men-honestly/337946/30 "2006-01-03T10:28:39Z")
as a british guy I’d have to agree (though im not sure about the private school bit!) I was brought up with a whole stack of manners and ‘good behaviour’ patterns. First date, find out what sort of things the girl likes, decide whether you like her, generaly build up a bit of framework. Maybe a good night kiss if its gone well. Basicaly from our point of view its pretty much total pot luck, some women react well to you not being too forward, to share the decision making processes, some expect for you to organise all details of the date and to take the chance if they want things to progress… unless the bloke is very lucky he has no way of telling which is which and will just go with their gut feeling. Usually totally disastrous 😛 And to be blunt, the post date message sounds like he was just extra nervous and as such totally blind to any ‘signs’ you may have sent his way. he wanted to impress and has no clue whether he succeeded or not. what consitutes a british accent by the way? As in we have so many crazy local accents, I for example in briish terms dont have an accent yet i would no doubt be identifiable as having a ‘british’ accent by you lot 🙂 > [@twopennorth](#): > > He likes you. > > This is an Englishman being polite and showing respect to a woman. > > I’d guess he was privately educated at a boys school, but I could be wrong. > N.B I am female so it doesn’t make 100% sense to me, either. ---
**Author:** ![Angua](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8baadc/32.png) [@Angua](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Angua)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2006, 12:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-men-honestly/337946/31 "2006-01-03T12:28:57Z")
> [@Revenant Threshold](#): > > As a Repressed British Guy ( a fellow Londoner, in fact) I assure you this will work. _Definetly_. And if you can drink six pints along with us, all the better! (Mental Note: Ask **Jennyrosity** out - free beer may ensue). I wouldn’t bother, another Doper already did. 😉 Well, kind of. In actuality it involved lots of beer, and **Jennyrosity** and myself in the ladies with **Jennyrosity** saying “I really really like him!!”, and me going “well, ask him out then”, and her going “no, I can’t”. And then me going upto him and doing the entire “My mate really fancies you” thing. Half an hour later: they’re snogging in the corner. 😃 > [@Mr Jim](#): > > To be fair the tube is a crap place to say goodbye as the door is only open for 15 seconds or whatever but a quick kiss would’ve fit in there. Actually, one of the most passionate goodbyes I’ve had was on the Tube. Well, not quite _on_ the Tube, but just outside the ticket barriers. _gets lost in pleasant memories_ 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2006, 12:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-men-honestly/337946/32 "2006-01-03T12:40:20Z")
You’re talking about interacting with foreigners who have a different set of social customs, gestures, mannerisms and body language etc; that they happen to speak a language similar to yours is lending you the false impression that you are not foreigners to one another. Hence much of the confusion. ---
**Author:** ![garius](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e19b73/32.png) [@garius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/garius)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2006, 12:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-men-honestly/337946/33 "2006-01-03T12:48:01Z")
Us British men don’t like dating you funny furriners as there is very little chance of it raising our aristocratic standing and our mothers would never approve. ---
**Author:** ![Jennyrosity](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/2bfe46/32.png) [@Jennyrosity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jennyrosity)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2006, 1:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-men-honestly/337946/34 "2006-01-03T13:44:58Z")
> [@Angua](#): > > I wouldn’t bother, another Doper already did. 😉 Well, kind of. In actuality it involved lots of beer, and **Jennyrosity** and myself in the ladies with **Jennyrosity** saying “I really really like him!!”, and me going “well, ask him out then”, and her going “no, I can’t”. And then me going upto him and doing the entire “My mate really fancies you” thing. Half an hour later: they’re snogging in the corner. 😃 See? Beer is the answer! And helpful friends… ---
**Author:** ![Angua](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8baadc/32.png) [@Angua](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Angua)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2006, 2:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-men-honestly/337946/35 "2006-01-03T14:10:13Z")
> [@Jennyrosity](#): > > See? Beer is the answer! And helpful friends… When _isn’t_ beer the answer? It worked for me and **Bonzer** too. Except I didn’t have the helpful friend doing the “my mate fancies you” thing. ---
**Author:** ![sunfish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/96bed5/32.png) [@sunfish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sunfish)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2006, 2:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-men-honestly/337946/36 "2006-01-03T14:47:11Z")
> [@garius](#): > > Us British men don’t like dating you funny furriners as there is very little chance of it raising our aristocratic standing and our mothers would never approve. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![garius](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e19b73/32.png) [@garius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/garius)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2006, 2:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-men-honestly/337946/37 "2006-01-03T14:47:56Z")
> [@](#): > > When isn’t beer the answer? It worked for me and Bonzer too. Except I didn’t have the helpful friend doing the “my mate fancies you” thing. Well you didn’t exactly give me a chance. “ **Bonzer** , a mate of mine fancies… oh, dreadfully sorry - she already appears to be stuck to your face. Nevermind.” ---
**Author:** ![Angua](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8baadc/32.png) [@Angua](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Angua)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2006, 2:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-men-honestly/337946/38 "2006-01-03T14:52:55Z")
> [@garius](#): > > Well you didn’t exactly give me a chance. > > “ **Bonzer** , a mate of mine fancies… oh, dreadfully sorry - she already appears to be stuck to your face. Nevermind.” Yeah, but he wasn’t complaining. Hmmm… Maybe we’re illustrating how best to find partners – go to DopeFests. ---
**Author:** ![garius](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e19b73/32.png) [@garius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/garius)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2006, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-men-honestly/337946/39 "2006-01-03T14:58:36Z")
Nah. Them’s all freaks those interweb people. As a personal rule i refuse to date anyone i meet on the internet. ---
**Author:** ![Angua](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8baadc/32.png) [@Angua](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Angua)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2006, 3:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-men-honestly/337946/40 "2006-01-03T15:01:34Z")
:dubious: [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-men-honestly/337946.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-men-honestly/337946.md?page=3)