# British Weddings **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [February 2, 2005, 1:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-weddings/287972 "2005-02-02T13:10:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![CBCD](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9fc348/32.png) [@CBCD](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CBCD)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2005, 7:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-weddings/287972/141 "2005-02-08T19:14:17Z")
> [@Rodd Hill](#): > > And just where does the [Bouncy Castle](http://www.krazy-castles.co.uk/Adultcastles.html) fit into all this? > > And **Rayne Man** : I had you pegged as a guy who knew the ropes. (Note the use of past tents). > > More than you ever wanted to know about [historic tents & marquees](http://www.tentsmiths.com/) Now you’ve gone and done it! There is a listing in the historic tent & marquees site for [_ **awnings for marquees** _!](http://www.tentsmiths.com/period-tents-awnings-marquees.html) I think the universe is going to start folding up into itself. Save the women and children first! We’re doomed! ---
**Author:** ![CrazyCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CrazyCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrazyCatLady)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2005, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-weddings/287972/142 "2005-02-08T20:13:54Z")
> [@owlstretchingtime](#): > > And you don’t even have pantos. But pantos make those ugly lines through your slacks. Besides, I thought guys liked it when you didn’t wear pantos. ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2005, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-weddings/287972/143 "2005-02-08T20:45:04Z")
Wendy House = play house. Boy’s version is clubhouse or fort. Not canvas or tent like, but either wooden or _shudder_ molded plastic. cracker = well, not really party popper. Party poppers make noise, and some spew confetti everywhere. A cracker contains little cheap trinkets inside and a paper crown. We have them here at Christmastime, though they’re not common, and they’re just called “Christmas Crackers.” panto = pantomime =/= Marcel Marceau. It’s Children’s Theater to us. Not performed BY children, but performed for children. So what’s the thing with the guys in white face paint and black suspenders (…er, braces, not garters) who don’t talk but manage to be extremely annoying anyway? And why the frell is the “Chicken Dance” called the “Ketchup Song”? 😕 ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2005, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-weddings/287972/144 "2005-02-08T20:56:15Z")
> [@CBCD](#): > > Now you’ve gone and done it! There is a listing in the historic tent & marquees site for [_ **awnings for marquees** _!](http://www.tentsmiths.com/period-tents-awnings-marquees.html) I think the universe is going to start folding up into itself. Save the women and children first! We’re doomed! I wouldn’t worry too much about it. Nobody will be able to figure out where the support poles are supposed to go, or the box will be lost, or too ripped up to use, so they’ll just decide to leave it up until, I dunno, heat death or something comes along. Oh, and **owlstretchingtime** and **Jennyrosity** regarding your big scene over pantos, may I respectfully suggest that you two get a room? 😛 ---
**Author:** ![muffinismydog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/958977/32.png) [@muffinismydog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/muffinismydog)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2005, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-weddings/287972/145 "2005-02-08T21:49:21Z")
> [@owlstretchingtime](#): > > It’s a funny animal. It hunts in packs with cheese and pineapple hedgehogs. > > It’s natural summer habitat is in big tents (at Ascot, Henley, School Fetes etc) Could those marshmallow peeps we get at Easter be considered Vol-au-vents? Maybe jelly beans, or those Cadbury eggs…(hey, Cadbury is English, right?). 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Rayne\_Man](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/df705f/32.png) [@Rayne\_Man](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rayne_Man)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2005, 10:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-weddings/287972/146 "2005-02-08T22:02:31Z")
> [@muffinismydog](#): > > Could those marshmallow peeps we get at Easter be considered Vol-au-vents? > Maybe jelly beans, or those Cadbury eggs…(hey, Cadbury is English, right?). 😛 Certainly not . From my dictionary :- _vol-au-vont : a pie of puff pastry filled with a sauce containing meat or fish._ ---
**Author:** ![Jennyrosity](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/2bfe46/32.png) [@Jennyrosity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jennyrosity)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2005, 10:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-weddings/287972/147 "2005-02-08T22:16:10Z")
> [@garius](#): > > Strange, I could have _sworn_ i saw you in the Plymouth Empire’s production of Aladdin last year. Take back that absurd piece of slander (or is it libel? - I forget how that works) immediately or risk the consequences. ---
**Author:** ![Marvel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/779978/32.png) [@Marvel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marvel)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2005, 10:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-weddings/287972/148 "2005-02-08T22:53:34Z")
> [@curly chick](#): > > Until pretty recently in GB you could only get married in a church/mosque/temple similar recognised religious place or a register office. Now you can get married in Britain in all manner of new places, so maybe you could have your wedding ceremony in the marquee, too. Wait, the government tells you WHERE you can or cannot get married? Here in the states, you can get hitched anywhere you damn well please - in a church, in a garbage dump OR under a tree in a lakeside park like Hubby and I did - so long as: 1. The person performing the ceremony is licened to do so in that state. 2. The couple have brought a wedding licnese with them to be signed and 3. There is a minimum of two witnesses. Patty ---
**Author:** ![Warnas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b77776/32.png) [@Warnas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Warnas)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2005, 10:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-weddings/287972/149 "2005-02-08T22:58:34Z")
Good thing you didn’t bother to look it up in a dictionary. Lying bastards. Look what I found after 1 (one) strenuous milisecond spent Googling: > **[Definition of marquee | Dictionary.com](https://www.dictionary.com/browse/marquee)** > > Definition of marquee from Dictionary.com, the world’s leading online source for English definitions, pronunciations, word origins, idioms, Word of the Day, and more. mar·quee ( P ) Pronunciation Key (mär-k) n. 1. Owl-stretching device, mainly used in Kuala Lumpur, for the purposes of stretching owls. 2. Ladder leading to the basement in a priest’s residence, usually made of roasted almonds. 3. adj. 1. Having a rotund hindquarters. “Oprah is less and less marquee these days.” ---
**Author:** ![GorillaMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/50afbb/32.png) [@GorillaMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GorillaMan)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2005, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-weddings/287972/150 "2005-02-08T23:33:08Z")
> [@Marvel](#): > > Wait, the government tells you WHERE you can or cannot get married? Here in the states, you can get hitched anywhere you damn well please There’s a pretty good historical difference for the two approaches. Marriages were an essential part of English (and in a wider sense European) social structure for many centuries - they defined who would inherit land, etc. So it was necessary for the procedures to be specific and easily-monitorable. For example, wealthy heiresses needed protection against being forced into nonconsensual or otherwise-dubious marriages. The bureaucracy that supports such a system disappear overnight, nor over decades. In America, however, there wasn’t anything like this necessity - and there was also the constantly-expanding territory in which such marriages would take place. So the regulations allow more flexibility over what constitutes a valid and official marriage. ---
**Author:** ![owlstretchingtime](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/958977/32.png) [@owlstretchingtime](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/owlstretchingtime)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2005, 9:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-weddings/287972/151 "2005-02-09T09:28:04Z")
> [@WhyNot](#): > > panto = pantomime =/= Marcel Marceau. It’s Children’s Theater to us. Not performed BY children, but performed for children. > > So what’s the thing with the guys in white face paint and black suspenders (…er, braces, not garters) who don’t talk but manage to be extremely annoying anyway? > > And why the frell is the “Chicken Dance” called the “Ketchup Song”? 😕 Re Pantos - you’re miles off. They aren’t just for kids and thyey most certainly don’t involve mime - in fact they’re the noisiest thing that happens in theatres outside of a Motorhead gig. They’re great fun - ignore **jennyrosity** by her own admission she was miffed that it stopped her reading a book (and I’d put good money on that book being by a Bronte or Sylvia Plath 😛 ) The white faced fellahs are followers of Marcel Marceau, and annoy us every bit as much as any other Frenchman does. And that’s a lot. I have no idea what a chicken dance is (unless it’s what Ian Wright does on the adverts)but the Birdie dance is a specific song played when tipsy grannies are about so they can dance with their grandchildren (even when those grandchildren are in their 30s - Grrrr). ---
**Author:** ![owlstretchingtime](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/958977/32.png) [@owlstretchingtime](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/owlstretchingtime)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2005, 9:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-weddings/287972/152 "2005-02-09T09:30:53Z")
[QUOTE=Rodd Hill] And just where does the Bouncy Castle fit into all this? QUOTE] I am very fond of the Viz Profanisaurus definition of this: Bouncy Castle (n): Something large and soft that you fancy bouncing up and down on after an afternoon drinking cider, ie a fat bint. ---
**Author:** ![owlstretchingtime](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/958977/32.png) [@owlstretchingtime](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/owlstretchingtime)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2005, 9:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-weddings/287972/153 "2005-02-09T09:36:21Z")
> [@Marvel](#): > > Wait, the government tells you WHERE you can or cannot get married? Here in the states, you can get hitched anywhere you damn well please - in a church, in a garbage dump OR under a tree in a lakeside park like Hubby and I did - so long as: > > 1. The person performing the ceremony is licened to do so in that state. > 2. The couple have brought a wedding licnese with them to be signed and > 3. There is a minimum of two witnesses. > > Patty You can get married pretty much anywhere you like these days - provided the _premises_ are licenced and you have the right official present. Most people still get married in either church (most CoE churches will marry anyone (nominally christian) - whether or not they’re actually religious.) Indeed most Brits only go to church for hatchings, matchings and dispatchings. It does of course help that all our churches are older than America and don’t look like out of town superstores. 😛 Owl - Once in a church and once in a registery office. Next time it will be on the pitch at White Hart Lane (this is perfectly possible - the Lane is licenced). ---
**Author:** ![Hoopy\_Frood](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hoopy_frood/32/8452_2.png) [@Hoopy\_Frood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hoopy_Frood)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2005, 12:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-weddings/287972/154 "2005-02-09T12:23:51Z")
> [@WhyNot](#): > > cracker = well, not really party popper. Party poppers make noise, and some spew confetti everywhere. A cracker contains little cheap trinkets inside and a paper crown. We have them here at Christmastime, though they’re not common, and they’re just called “Christmas Crackers.” True, but I did have some once that called them both Party Poppers and Crackers, and they were Crackers, complete with cheap ass paper crown and cheap ass toy (i.e. clip on key ring). > [@owlstretchingtime](#): > > I have no idea what a chicken dance is (unless it’s what Ian Wright does on the adverts)but the Birdie dance is a specific song played when tipsy grannies are about so they can dance with their grandchildren (even when those grandchildren are in their 30s - Grrrr). Sounds like our chicken dance. Here’s a page with a MIDI file (and some pictures) of it (wearing chicken hats is completely optional; in fact, I’ve never seen people actually wear hats while dancing to it before): [Chicken Dance!](http://www.marean.net/davejen/cd.html) ---
**Author:** ![owlstretchingtime](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/958977/32.png) [@owlstretchingtime](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/owlstretchingtime)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2005, 12:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-weddings/287972/155 "2005-02-09T12:53:18Z")
People of a nervous disposition should look away now. This is (apparently) the chicken dance. \>\>\>\>\>\>\> Anyone who’s not chicken, stand in a circle facing each other. When the music starts, hold your hands out in front of you and open and close them like a chicken beak four times. Put your thumbs in your armpits and flap your wings four times. Place your arms and hands like the tail feathers of a chicken and wiggle down to the floor four times. Clap four times. Repeat steps 1-5 four times. After the fourth time take the hands of the people on either side of you and everyone move in a circle. When you get dizzy, switch directions. Repeat until the end of the music or until you fall on the floor. \>\>\>\>\>\> Just when you thought that the yanks couldn’t come up with something weirder than Michael Jackson they come up with this. Sweet baby Jesus, thank God we got rid of them in 1776 (we let you win). Those hats are very _special_ too. ---
**Author:** ![GorillaMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/50afbb/32.png) [@GorillaMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GorillaMan)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2005, 2:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-weddings/287972/156 "2005-02-09T14:38:31Z")
> [@owlstretchingtime](#): > > most CoE churches will marry anyone (nominally christian) - whether or not they’re actually religious Parish churches are actually _obliged_ to marry any parishoner who so wishes. ---
**Author:** ![owlstretchingtime](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/958977/32.png) [@owlstretchingtime](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/owlstretchingtime)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2005, 3:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-weddings/287972/157 "2005-02-09T15:19:34Z")
> [@GorillaMan](#): > > Parish churches are actually _obliged_ to marry any parishoner who so wishes. It’s also a way of getting the congregation up as you’re supposed to go for the four weeks in advance to hear the Banns being read (not compulsory but lots of people do it). I got married here: [http://www.cityofwinchester.co.uk/history/html/st\_cross.html](http://www.cityofwinchester.co.uk/history/html/st_cross.html) (Birdie dance not pictured) ---
**Author:** ![CBCD](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9fc348/32.png) [@CBCD](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CBCD)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2005, 11:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-weddings/287972/158 "2005-02-10T11:52:40Z")
Well gosh golly! It looks as if Her Royal Highness herself was reading this thread, and has just given her blessing to Prince Charles to marry what’s her name. This just in from [The Times Online](http://www.timesonline.co.uk/article/0,,2-1478157,00.html): (registration required) > [@](#): > > The ceremony will take place at Windsor Castle on Friday April 8 and Mrs Parker Bowles will use the title HRH the Duchess of Cornwall after the marriage. When Charles becomes King, Camilla will be known as the Princess Consort. She will never be Queen. > The wedding will be a civil ceremony, followed by a service of prayer and dedication in St George’s Chapel, Windsor, at which Rowan Williams, the Archbishop of Canterbury, will preside. Will there be a marquee? Will there be a tent? Will P. Spice & Becks be there? Who dares to unlock the creature living in the Wendy House? ---
**Author:** ![owlstretchingtime](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/958977/32.png) [@owlstretchingtime](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/owlstretchingtime)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2005, 11:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-weddings/287972/159 "2005-02-10T11:58:33Z")
> [@CBCD](#): > > Will there be a marquee? Will there be a tent?? I wouldn’t be inn the least bit suprised if there were a marquee (the queen has loads of them -she uses them for the garden parties). Prince Andrew will be taking the role of lecherous uncle. The Crying girl wil be played by Lady Melons Windsor. Her Majesty herself will be the birdie song dancing granny. Princes William and harry will be the mortified grandchildren ---
**Author:** ![CBCD](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9fc348/32.png) [@CBCD](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CBCD)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2005, 12:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/british-weddings/287972/160 "2005-02-10T12:16:15Z")
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