# Britney Spears: fuckin' fashion GENIUS!

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-fuckin-fashion-genius/54428>\
**Category:** The BBQ Pit\
**Created:** [February 14, 2001, 5:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-fuckin-fashion-genius/54428 "2001-02-14T05:19:08Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 1

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![The\_Man\_Who](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c2a13f/32.png) [@The\_Man\_Who](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Man_Who)\
**Post date:** [February 14, 2001, 5:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-fuckin-fashion-genius/54428/1 "2001-02-14T05:19:08Z")

</div>

According to this article

[http://www.ew.com/ew/report/0,6115,99151~3~0~wasthattubesockbritney,00.html](http://www.ew.com/ew/report/0,6115,99151~3~0~wasthattubesockbritney,00.html)

at the Super Bowl halftime show BS (love those initals) wore a motherfucking TUBE SOCK around her arm as some sort of fashion statement.

I’ll be God damned. I had no idea Mick Foley was the fashion trendsetter of the year.

Let’s go now to the fashion sychophants quoted in the article:

**"I loved it," gushes celeb stylist Ryan Colby, who has worked with Ryan Phillippe and Jared Leto, adding "It’s a 'Flashdance’y --but more updated – look, a throwback to the '80s."**

If you look at the names Ryan Phillippe and Jared Leto with your eyers squinted, it kind of looks like “dipshit retard.” Just an observation. By the way, who the fuckleduck are Ryan Phillippe and Jared Leto, and why are they so stupid they can’t dress themselves? Guys, if Ryan Colby tried to get you to wear a sock on your hand (or anywhere else for that matter) kick his motherfucking “celeb stylist” ass, m’kay?

Another quote: **“Right now, the look is preppy, it’s retro sport, or it’s punk,” says Sue Otto, creative director for Urban Outfitters.**

It’s preppy! It’s Retro! It’s punk! It’s a floor cleaner! It’s a dessert topping! Here’s your next fashion trailblazer: Polo shirts and whalebone corsets. Get 'em before they foist some other dipshit thing onto your 8-year-olds. Hey you palidromically named idiot, which is it? Retro, punk, or preppy? Make up your fucking “which way is the wind turing today? I love hanging out with celebrities” mind. Really, is there anyone over the age of nine who doesn’t look at this and think, “That’s about the dumbest god-diddly-damn thing I’ve ever seen.”? I mean Jeeze. Even the kids in the Special Olympics know how to put on their socks, for chrissakes. Here’s another palindrome for ya, Sue: getafuckingclueeulcgnikcufateg.

A final quote: **“A god-damn sock! On her hand! It’s genius! Dear God! It’s the third miracle of Fatima! 11-year-old girls should all wear socks on their hands!” raved “Hillbilly” Hank Tardmonger, who designed outfits for the Miss Bumblefuck County, Arkansas, pageant.**

Okay, I made that one up.

You know, today I was reading Archie Comics Digest at the supermarket checkout, and there was a comic about how Veronica Lodge set fashion trends as a fucking joke. But I’m not inclined to believe that Britney Spears is that clever. More than likely, there’s some Pervo foot fetishist on her staff (or she on his. Whichever.) saying, “Now Britney, ( **slobber** ) wear the sock on your hands ( **drool** ). Now shove this stilletto heel between your tits ( **oh yeah** ).”

Fuck. I hear Justin Timberlake wears a tube sock, too, rolled up and shoved down the front of his pants. They should be very happy together.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![herownself](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/8baadc/32.png) [@herownself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/herownself)\
**Post date:** [February 14, 2001, 5:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-fuckin-fashion-genius/54428/2 "2001-02-14T05:36:36Z")

</div>

Hey - some people got it and some people don’t.

Most of us don’t know what it is and are thankful to have been spared.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![nikjohns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/53a042/32.png) [@nikjohns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nikjohns)\
**Post date:** [February 14, 2001, 5:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-fuckin-fashion-genius/54428/3 "2001-02-14T05:37:06Z")

</div>

> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by The Man Who \*  
> \*\*  
> I’ll be God damned. I had no idea Mick Foley was the fashion trendsetter of the year.  
> \*\*

[slight hijack]  
Mick Foley is the trendsetter of _everything_  
[/slight hijack]

Fashion… I see people like Spears, and also more on the catwalk wearing ridiculous shite, and I think “who in the hell would wear that. Ever.”

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![super\_head](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d6d6ee/32.png) [@super\_head](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/super_head)\
**Post date:** [February 14, 2001, 5:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-fuckin-fashion-genius/54428/4 "2001-02-14T05:50:08Z")

</div>

…she looks kinda tasty in the picture in the link you posted.

…agreed though, the quotes are beyond stupid.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![SPOOFE](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c5a1d2/32.png) [@SPOOFE](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SPOOFE)\
**Post date:** [February 14, 2001, 6:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-fuckin-fashion-genius/54428/5 "2001-02-14T06:42:19Z")

</div>

Mr. Who, I just have to say that I loved your rant. It was hilarious, it was well-toned… I give it a 9. Only one problem kept you from reaching a perfect 10…

> [@](#):
>
> That’s about the dumbest god- **diddly** -damn thing I’ve ever seen

You keep me out of this, okay?!? I want nothing to do with Spears and her dumbshit-sense of clothing, okay?!?

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Nacho4Sara](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Nacho4Sara](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nacho4Sara)\
**Post date:** [February 14, 2001, 1:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-fuckin-fashion-genius/54428/6 "2001-02-14T13:45:12Z")

</div>

**The Man Who** , I think I love you. I woke up an hour early because my clock was fucked up and have been in a pissy mood ever since, but you just made me very very happy. That’s one of the most hilarious rants I’ve read in a very long time.

I agree with the stupidity of the sock thing. I watched the SuperBowl at a bar with some friends in downtown Baltimore, and during the half-time show the place (filled as it was) quieted down significantly when Britney came on. We all observed a moment of awed silence, then some dude said incredulously, "_Is that a tube sock?_ Everyone is direct vicinity to the bar cracked up.

> [@](#):
>
> Fuck. I hear Justin Timberlake wears a tube sock, too, rolled up and shoved down the front of his pants. They should be very happy together.

Hehe. You just made my day.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![OpalCat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8edcca/32.png) [@OpalCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OpalCat)\
**Post date:** [February 14, 2001, 2:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-fuckin-fashion-genius/54428/7 "2001-02-14T14:20:46Z")

</div>

“The tube sock revolution emerged in Japan and France, migrated to urban dance clubs and bars, and will soon hit mainstream outlets like Urban Outfitters (which plans to sell embroidered athletic wristbands and charm laden arm socks this spring).”

I’m going into hiding this spring.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![TwistofFate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cdc98d/32.png) [@TwistofFate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TwistofFate)\
**Post date:** [February 14, 2001, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-fuckin-fashion-genius/54428/8 "2001-02-14T14:49:00Z")

</div>

I dont remember anyone whearing a sock on their dant in the 80’s, so its not really a throwback. Its most certainly not “punk”.

It’s a brainless muppet who dosent know how to dress herself and a “stylist” who has run out of ideas but still has 14 payment to make on his futon.

Pull up your pants.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![SpinneZiege](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9e8a1a/32.png) [@SpinneZiege](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SpinneZiege)\
**Post date:** [February 14, 2001, 3:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-fuckin-fashion-genius/54428/9 "2001-02-14T15:39:42Z")

</div>

Of course, Justin Timberlake didn’t start the tube sock thing. Everyone knows Leif Garrett did back in the eighties.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Non\_Toxic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Non\_Toxic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Non_Toxic)\
**Post date:** [February 14, 2001, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-fuckin-fashion-genius/54428/10 "2001-02-14T15:42:59Z")

</div>

Heck.  
My take on it is that it was a mistake.  
Before the show, she put her arm up Justin’s pants for  
nefarious purposes.  
When she pulled it out (her arm, silly) the sock was attached.  
Hey, new fashion idea!!

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![pldennison](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/9fc29f/32.png) [@pldennison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pldennison)\
**Post date:** [February 14, 2001, 3:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-fuckin-fashion-genius/54428/11 "2001-02-14T15:44:05Z")

</div>

I’m just embarrassed that I know who both Ryan Phillippe **and** Jared Leto are.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![BunnyGirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/22d042/32.png) [@BunnyGirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BunnyGirl)\
**Post date:** [February 14, 2001, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-fuckin-fashion-genius/54428/12 "2001-02-14T16:04:03Z")

</div>

Bravo, sir, bravo!

I think you’ve successfully passed the Amateur Flamers Test and are ready to move up into the high, exalted ranks of the Professional Flamers Association.

Jolly good show!

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Enderw24](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ba9def/32.png) [@Enderw24](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enderw24)\
**Post date:** [February 14, 2001, 4:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-fuckin-fashion-genius/54428/13 "2001-02-14T16:31:38Z")

</div>

Hey, hey! Let’s not give poor Brittney a hard time here. I think we’re jumping to conclusions as to why she’s wearing the tube sock. Maybe it’s not to set a trend.  
Maybe she took up the fine and cultural pastime of fencing with sabres. Those things sting if you’re not wearing arm protection.  
Maybe she’s forgetful and needed reminding of which arm was her left and which was her right. In the heat of the moment, you don’t have time to make that “L” shape with your fingers, you need to know now!  
Maybe she was just cold in the stadium. After all, if the only clothing you have is 2.5 inches of acryllic leather spandex and you have to stretch that across your plastic “jump-me jailbait” brand breasts, you’d be pretty damn cold too.

Please people. I know this is the pit, but let’s not just jump to conclusions.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![HomeSlice](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/9d8465/32.png) [@HomeSlice](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HomeSlice)\
**Post date:** [February 14, 2001, 4:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-fuckin-fashion-genius/54428/14 "2001-02-14T16:40:23Z")

</div>

I’m sorry, i wasn’t looking at her arms. 😃

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Tequila\_Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/41988e/32.png) [@Tequila\_Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tequila_Mockingbird)\
**Post date:** [February 14, 2001, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-fuckin-fashion-genius/54428/15 "2001-02-14T17:44:43Z")

</div>

The Man Who…bravo on the rant. Certainly made me giggle. I just wanted to add I have spotted the mate to BS’ sock arm. Anyone recall the movie Tank Girl?

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![SPOOFE](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c5a1d2/32.png) [@SPOOFE](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SPOOFE)\
**Post date:** [February 14, 2001, 6:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-fuckin-fashion-genius/54428/16 "2001-02-14T18:01:35Z")

</div>

Tequila…

You are never again to mention that movie on the SDMB. Failure to do so shall result in punishment by catapult.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![thinksnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thinksnow/32/2849_2.png) [@thinksnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thinksnow)\
**Post date:** [February 14, 2001, 6:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-fuckin-fashion-genius/54428/17 "2001-02-14T18:13:56Z")

</div>

I don’t see what you guys are ranting about, it was a great move, showing awe inspiring genius. You would do well to base your wardrobes on the fair Miss Brittany and MTv this season. Losers.

-Hank Tardmonger

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Tequila\_Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/41988e/32.png) [@Tequila\_Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tequila_Mockingbird)\
**Post date:** [February 14, 2001, 6:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-fuckin-fashion-genius/54428/18 "2001-02-14T18:33:10Z")

</div>

> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by SPOOFE Bo Diddly \*  
> \*\*Tequila…
> 
> You are never again to mention that movie on the SDMB. Failure to do so shall result in punishment by catapult. \*\*

Sorry SPOOFE…I didn’t say it was a good movie…just had the dumb sock arm …  
_flees out of fear from further chastisement_

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\
**Post date:** [February 15, 2001, 12:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-fuckin-fashion-genius/54428/19 "2001-02-15T00:19:05Z")

</div>

I used to wear socks as pretend gloves when I was like FIVE.  
Get a life, Britney!

That has to be the STUPIDEST looking thing I’ve seen yet.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![RickJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bb73d2/32.png) [@RickJay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RickJay)\
**Post date:** [February 15, 2001, 6:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-fuckin-fashion-genius/54428/20 "2001-02-15T06:03:26Z")

</div>

> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by pldennison \*  
> \*\*I’m just embarrassed that I know who both Ryan Phillippe **and** Jared Leto are. \*\*

I don’t know who the hell Jared Leto is, but I want to point out that Ryan Phillippe

A) Is banging Reese Witherspoon, who I think is hot, and

B) Killed a whole bunch of people in “The Way of the Gun,” so who knows, maybe he can be as cool as Mel Gibson.

So he’s not all that bad.

[Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-fuckin-fashion-genius/54428.md?page=2)
