# Britney Spears sliced up the belly, spawn removed

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-sliced-up-the-belly-spawn-removed/321675>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [September 14, 2005, 10:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-sliced-up-the-belly-spawn-removed/321675 "2005-09-14T22:19:12Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 2

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**Author:** ![Revtim](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/revtim/32/1042_2.png) [@Revtim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revtim)\
**Post date:** [September 15, 2005, 1:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-sliced-up-the-belly-spawn-removed/321675/21 "2005-09-15T13:43:12Z")

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> [@BiblioCat](#):
>
> The blurb I read on AOL News had this to say:  
> As someone who has given birth to two kids, one vaginally and one c-section, I gotta tell you, she really didn’t think that whole “avoiding pain” thing through. She’d have been better off with an epidural and popping him out naturally. The pain and recovery after a c-section was much worse than a vaginal birth. She’s a moron.

She probably just really didn’t want to stretch out the cooch any more, but couldn’t tell that to a reporter.

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**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\
**Post date:** [September 15, 2005, 2:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-sliced-up-the-belly-spawn-removed/321675/22 "2005-09-15T14:02:06Z")

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> [@Monstre](#):
>
> I’m hoping she will name the kid “Broccoli”.
> 
> Broccoli Spears.  
> Might as well. Not like he’s gonna get any **more** messed up by it… 😉

Surely you mean Asparagus - Gus for short.

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**Author:** ![Honey](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/honey/32/5074_2.png) [@Honey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Honey)\
**Post date:** [September 15, 2005, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-sliced-up-the-belly-spawn-removed/321675/23 "2005-09-15T17:12:41Z")

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The unfortunate kid has been named.

Preston Michael Spears Federline

PMS Federline.

Now the real fun for Cleetus begins: Interviewing them nannies! 😃

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**Author:** ![MovieMogul](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f08c70/32.png) [@MovieMogul](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MovieMogul)\
**Post date:** [September 15, 2005, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-sliced-up-the-belly-spawn-removed/321675/24 "2005-09-15T17:22:17Z")

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Thanks to everyone for a hilarious thread title and a very funny thread. 🙂

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**Author:** ![SlyFrog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a3d4f5/32.png) [@SlyFrog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SlyFrog)\
**Post date:** [September 15, 2005, 6:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-sliced-up-the-belly-spawn-removed/321675/25 "2005-09-15T18:13:23Z")

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The fact that we are even discussing this is helping the terrorists win.

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**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\
**Post date:** [September 15, 2005, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-sliced-up-the-belly-spawn-removed/321675/26 "2005-09-15T18:20:36Z")

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> [@Honey](#):
>
> Now the real fun for Cleetus begins: Interviewing them nannies! 😃

Tonya Harding’s not doing anything.

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**Author:** ![Salem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8c91f0/32.png) [@Salem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Salem)\
**Post date:** [September 15, 2005, 6:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-sliced-up-the-belly-spawn-removed/321675/27 "2005-09-15T18:44:32Z")

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Britney Releases New Single…  
Can’t take credit. Saw it scrolling on a news show.

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**Author:** ![Tripler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripler/32/21807_2.png) [@Tripler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tripler)\
**Post date:** [September 15, 2005, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-sliced-up-the-belly-spawn-removed/321675/28 "2005-09-15T23:04:50Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> _From the article_  
> Spears released her new fragrance, “Fantasy.” She says it was created with “all kinds of enchanting scents” including “lush red lychee” and even a **“hint of cupcakes,** white chocolate and jasmine.”

First the kid, now this.

That’s the last thing I need: To go on a date with a girl that smells like cupcakes, by a fragrance ‘designed’ by a tart.

Tripler  
Oy vey.

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**Author:** ![dinahmoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/8797f3/32.png) [@dinahmoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dinahmoe)\
**Post date:** [September 15, 2005, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-sliced-up-the-belly-spawn-removed/321675/29 "2005-09-15T23:51:51Z")

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How can you be sure that the smell is “cupcakes” exactly?

“Hm, you smell like cake, but smaller.”

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**Author:** ![dare\_devil007](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3bc359/32.png) [@dare\_devil007](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dare_devil007)\
**Post date:** [September 15, 2005, 11:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-sliced-up-the-belly-spawn-removed/321675/30 "2005-09-15T23:58:20Z")

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I feel sorry for the kid. If the baby had been a girl, I feel like I wouldn’t feel as sorry. I’m not sure why.

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**Author:** ![Atheist\_Princess](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a88e57/32.png) [@Atheist\_Princess](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atheist_Princess)\
**Post date:** [September 16, 2005, 12:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-sliced-up-the-belly-spawn-removed/321675/31 "2005-09-16T00:14:27Z")

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> [@dinahmoe](#):
>
> How can you be sure that the smell is “cupcakes” exactly?
> 
> “Hm, you smell like cake, but smaller.”

:D:D:D

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**Author:** ![BoringDad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ad7895/32.png) [@BoringDad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BoringDad)\
**Post date:** [September 16, 2005, 1:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-sliced-up-the-belly-spawn-removed/321675/32 "2005-09-16T01:07:47Z")

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> [@dinahmoe](#):
>
> How can you be sure that the smell is “cupcakes” exactly?
> 
> “Hm, you smell like cake, but smaller.”

Funniest post in this thread.

She will most likely be no worse a mother than any other 24 year old with a wildly unstable life.

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**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\
**Post date:** [September 16, 2005, 1:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-sliced-up-the-belly-spawn-removed/321675/33 "2005-09-16T01:11:19Z")

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This just in: the baby is already grown and has left the hospital crying “Bow to me! I am the Horned One!” They think it’s just diaper rash, but I’m not so sure.

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**Author:** ![THespos](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8c91f0/32.png) [@THespos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/THespos)\
**Post date:** [September 16, 2005, 1:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-sliced-up-the-belly-spawn-removed/321675/34 "2005-09-16T01:15:40Z")

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How funny is it going to be when she has a big, nasty C-section scar in her next video?

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**Author:** ![dangermom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e274bd/32.png) [@dangermom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dangermom)\
**Post date:** [September 16, 2005, 3:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-sliced-up-the-belly-spawn-removed/321675/35 "2005-09-16T03:05:46Z")

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Ya know, having c-sections has pretty much permanently messed up my stomach muscles. If she’s thinking she’s going to do a few crunches and get those tight abs right back, she’s got a surprise coming…

Well, maybe. I can hope. Probably her babies didn’t weight 10 pounds though. That might have had something to do with it. Still, vaginal birth is easier to recover from most of the time.

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**Author:** ![Mighty\_Girl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7bcc69/32.png) [@Mighty\_Girl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mighty_Girl)\
**Post date:** [September 16, 2005, 3:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-sliced-up-the-belly-spawn-removed/321675/36 "2005-09-16T03:20:00Z")

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> [@BiblioCat](#):
>
> The blurb I read on AOL News had this to say:  
> As someone who has given birth to two kids, one vaginally and one c-section, I gotta tell you, she really didn’t think that whole “avoiding pain” thing through. She’d have been better off with an epidural and popping him out naturally. The pain and recovery after a c-section was much worse than a vaginal birth. She’s a moron.

Preach it sister! 2 months and 15 days since my c-section and my wound hasn’t still healed completely.

Avoiding pain. Meh!

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**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\
**Post date:** [September 16, 2005, 5:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-sliced-up-the-belly-spawn-removed/321675/37 "2005-09-16T05:05:46Z")

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> [@Happy Lendervedder](#):
>
> I actually used to write headlines for a living. My crowning jewel, which I thought would **never** actually make it to print: “City erection halted” in reference to a construction project put on hold. When called out on it by my editor, I challenged her to do better. She couldn’t, but I don’t think she really tried. I suspect she was somewhat intrigued by seeing the word ‘erection’ in 44-point font. Granted it was buried in the middle of the section, but it was always my goal to get the words “erection” or “erects” somewhere on the front page. Never happened tho.
> 
> My second choice for this thread title: “Pop tart’s filling removed.”
> 
> Happy

My husband and I have discussed double entendres that we’ve seen here and there, and he (former college newspaper editor) maintains that there are NO coincidental phrases - more like, copy writers giggling together over what they’ve managed to get past the editor.

Oh yeah, the OP - meh. Don’t know, don’t care about Britney and her kids.

“Blanket” Jackson - that’s funny. Aren’t all of Michael’s kids named Prince Michael Jackson?\*  
\*Yes, I know, just the two boys are named Prince Michael Jackson, and the girl is named Paris Michael Jackson. That’s not crazy at all.

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**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\
**Post date:** [September 16, 2005, 5:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-sliced-up-the-belly-spawn-removed/321675/38 "2005-09-16T05:07:37Z")

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Dag nab it, I also meant to add, you should write headlines for everything, every day, **Happy**.

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**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\
**Post date:** [September 16, 2005, 5:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-sliced-up-the-belly-spawn-removed/321675/39 "2005-09-16T05:24:07Z")

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> [@SlyFrog](#):
>
> The fact that we are even discussing this is helping the terrorists win.

If the terrorists see how much news coverage Britney, her cheating husband, and their new worthless kid are getting, they may just give up and go home. Here’s hoping!

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**Author:** ![Large\_Marge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/50afbb/32.png) [@Large\_Marge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Large_Marge)\
**Post date:** [September 16, 2005, 8:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/britney-spears-sliced-up-the-belly-spawn-removed/321675/40 "2005-09-16T08:39:34Z")

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So what did she name the poor thing?

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