# BROAD BRUSH ALERT - Moseying Teens **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [April 19, 2006, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broad-brush-alert-moseying-teens/353350 "2006-04-19T19:56:29Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Gangster\_Octopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a8b319/32.png) [@Gangster\_Octopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gangster_Octopus)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2006, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broad-brush-alert-moseying-teens/353350/1 "2006-04-19T19:56:29Z")
Damn kids! Just cross the frigging street at a normal pace, not your disinterested, just rolled out of bed, the weight of the world has got me down saunter that seems to be in so much fashion. It isn’t going to ruin my day but it sure as hell is annoying. When I want to turn and I am going to have to wait for another light. Especially when you decide to start your unending trek across the Four Lanes of Tears after the “Don’t Walk” sign has started flashing. I am not asking for a sprint, just as a courtesy a healthy pace is appreciated, especially when you should have the unending joy of youth and liveliness at your disposal. I am now officially a fogey. ---
**Author:** ![Greathouse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/greathouse/32/2992_2.png) [@Greathouse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Greathouse)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2006, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broad-brush-alert-moseying-teens/353350/2 "2006-04-19T20:03:25Z")
> [@Gangster Octopus](#): > > I am now officially a fogey. I’m a member in good standing. Welcome to the club. ---
**Author:** ![taxi78cab](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e47c2d/32.png) [@taxi78cab](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/taxi78cab)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2006, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broad-brush-alert-moseying-teens/353350/3 "2006-04-19T20:13:25Z")
Or worse, they walk down the middle of the frickin’ street when there’s a perfectly good sidewalk just a few feet away. And then give me dirty looks for wanting to DRIVE down the street. Gah! I’m only 8 years away from having been a teen, and I’m already an old fogey. ---
**Author:** ![Duke\_of\_Rat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ad7895/32.png) [@Duke\_of\_Rat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duke_of_Rat)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2006, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broad-brush-alert-moseying-teens/353350/4 "2006-04-19T20:14:36Z")
Horn broken? ---
**Author:** ![OtakuLoki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ac8455/32.png) [@OtakuLoki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OtakuLoki)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2006, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broad-brush-alert-moseying-teens/353350/5 "2006-04-19T20:28:38Z")
No, my ear horn is on the seat, next to me. Why would I want to listen to that noise those moseying teens are playing anyways? It’s all crap. Hmmph. ---
**Author:** ![Omegaman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/e480ec/32.png) [@Omegaman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omegaman)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2006, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broad-brush-alert-moseying-teens/353350/6 "2006-04-19T20:32:58Z")
Welcome to the Old Dude Club. Membership is free. ---
**Author:** ![pinkfreud](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pinkfreud/32/17603_2.png) [@pinkfreud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pinkfreud)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2006, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broad-brush-alert-moseying-teens/353350/7 "2006-04-19T20:36:57Z")
Gol’durned meanderthals. ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2006, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broad-brush-alert-moseying-teens/353350/8 "2006-04-19T21:18:41Z")
> [@pinkfreud](#): > > Gol’durned meanderthals. 😃 Be patient. Eventually they’ll evolve to Slo-Madmen. ---
**Author:** ![levdrakon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/49beb7/32.png) [@levdrakon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/levdrakon)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2006, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broad-brush-alert-moseying-teens/353350/9 "2006-04-19T21:29:02Z")
> [@Gangster Octopus](#): > > I am now officially a fogey. No you’re not. If you were, you’d be here talking about this trend lately, of putting a countdown timer on the “Walk-Don’t Walk” signs. They give you something like 7.4 seconds to get across an intersection that takes more like 13.275 seconds to cross, so you make it about half way through the intersection before you have to drop your cane and do a Forrest Gump the rest of the way because you can hear all the impatient whippersnappers gunning their engines and watching for the light to turn to “don’t walk” so they can - in their minds - legally run you down. ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Clam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/3bc359/32.png) [@Happy\_Clam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Clam)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2006, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broad-brush-alert-moseying-teens/353350/10 "2006-04-19T21:47:34Z")
Y’know what else I hate? Their music! Come on now, all together: **Damn kids and their music!** ---
**Author:** ![tiny\_ham](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a183cd/32.png) [@tiny\_ham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiny_ham)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2006, 9:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broad-brush-alert-moseying-teens/353350/11 "2006-04-19T21:51:53Z")
AND PICK UP YOUR FEET WHEN YOU WALK. The shuffling, my god the shuffling. Is life so fucking exhausting that you can’t PICK UP YOUR FEET WHEN YOU WALK? When I’m behind a thicket of teen girls shuffling in their flip flops I want to kick them in their knees and walk right over the backs of the fallen. ---
**Author:** ![scout1222](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/34f0e0/32.png) [@scout1222](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scout1222)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2006, 10:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broad-brush-alert-moseying-teens/353350/12 "2006-04-19T22:14:43Z")
> [@OtakuLoki](#): > > No, my ear horn is on the seat, next to me. God damn, this is the funniest thing I’ve read all day. –fellow old fogie ---
**Author:** ![eenerms](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/cdc98d/32.png) [@eenerms](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eenerms)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2006, 11:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broad-brush-alert-moseying-teens/353350/13 "2006-04-19T23:17:09Z")
What I don’t get are the pajama bottoms(They have tops on too, usually tank tops) and fuzzy slippers that the girls are wearing to school. Am I a foggeyette? ---
**Author:** ![abbeytxs](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/eb9ed0/32.png) [@abbeytxs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/abbeytxs)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2006, 11:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broad-brush-alert-moseying-teens/353350/14 "2006-04-19T23:38:30Z")
> [@tiny ham](#): > > AND PICK UP YOUR FEET WHEN YOU WALK. The shuffling, my god the shuffling. Is life so fucking exhausting that you can’t PICK UP YOUR FEET WHEN YOU WALK? > > When I’m behind a thicket of teen girls shuffling in their flip flops I want to kick them in their knees and walk right over the backs of the fallen. Word!!! (oh wait, no one but old farts says that anymore) I live with one of the aforementioned shuffling teen girls and the shuffling has driven me to insanity. Its not just the flip flops, the child appears to be completely incapable of tying her Vans too! (Vans, not Airwalks, only losers wear Airwalks :rolleyes: ) I swear it wasn’t that long ago that she was so proud of herself for learning to tie her shoes all by herself and now… I really am old and farty. ---
**Author:** ![thirdwarning](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ecccb3/32.png) [@thirdwarning](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thirdwarning)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2006, 2:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broad-brush-alert-moseying-teens/353350/15 "2006-04-20T02:52:43Z")
> [@pinkfreud](#): > > Gol’durned meanderthals. You…you…you made me choke!! BTW, thanks for the giggle. ---
**Author:** ![kambuckta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/53a042/32.png) [@kambuckta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kambuckta)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2006, 3:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broad-brush-alert-moseying-teens/353350/16 "2006-04-20T03:08:04Z")
> [@tiny ham](#): > > AND PICK UP YOUR FEET WHEN YOU WALK. The shuffling, my god the shuffling. Is life so fucking exhausting that you can’t PICK UP YOUR FEET WHEN YOU WALK? > . The boys _have_ to shuffle. See, their pants are slung half-way between their bum and their knees, so shuffling (legs akimbo) is the only way to move forward without dropping their dacks completely. Although, given that their arses are already exposed, I can’t see why the prospect of losing their pants should matter to them really. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2006, 4:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broad-brush-alert-moseying-teens/353350/17 "2006-04-20T04:47:39Z")
> [@kambuckta](#): > > The boys _have_ to shuffle. See, their pants are slung half-way between their bum and their knees, so shuffling (legs akimbo) is the only way to move forward without dropping their dacks completely. I am SOOOOO tempted to come up close behind them and suddenly scream “THERE’S A LION LOOSE! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!” ---
**Author:** ![Seven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Seven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Seven)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2006, 5:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broad-brush-alert-moseying-teens/353350/18 "2006-04-20T05:02:37Z")
> [@kambuckta](#): > > The boys _have_ to shuffle. See, their pants are slung half-way between their bum and their knees, so shuffling (legs akimbo) is the only way to move forward without dropping their dacks completely. > > Although, given that their arses are already exposed, I can’t see why the prospect of losing their pants should matter to them really. > > 😉 That is their pants?? I thought there was just some weird huge trunk/mini leg mutation going around. Now I know it is fashion I can make fun of them. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Alice\_The\_Goon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ed8c4c/32.png) [@Alice\_The\_Goon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alice_The_Goon)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2006, 5:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broad-brush-alert-moseying-teens/353350/19 "2006-04-20T05:08:19Z")
This thread has me laughing out loud. I always want to whisper, “Pssst! Your pants are falling down!!” ---
**Author:** ![kambuckta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/53a042/32.png) [@kambuckta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kambuckta)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2006, 5:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broad-brush-alert-moseying-teens/353350/20 "2006-04-20T05:30:56Z")
> [@trublmakr](#): > > I always want to whisper, “Pssst! Your pants are falling down!!” The Fashion Afficionados have come up with a solution to us mad old crones (and fogeys) whispering such things. They invented STOVE PIPE JEANS, so even though the Calvin Klein jocks (and the stinky skidmarks) are still exposed, the cling of the denim to the leg ensures that the pants don’t actually **fall down** anymore. At least not to the ground. Bloody kids have an answer for everything nowadays. 😃 [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broad-brush-alert-moseying-teens/353350.md?page=2)