# Broadway!! What Role Do YOU want to Play? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [October 22, 2004, 1:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broadway-what-role-do-you-want-to-play/270529 "2004-10-22T01:47:59Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 9\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![Katisha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/bcef8e/32.png) [@Katisha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Katisha)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2004, 10:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broadway-what-role-do-you-want-to-play/270529/101 "2004-10-24T22:54:07Z")
> [@DocCathode](#): > > **Plnnr** > > The oldest slash that I know of is the fanzine Naked Times. It wa printed while the original Star Trek was on the air and is devoted entirely to stories and illustrations of Kirk fraternizing with a certian half Vulcan science officer. Yeah, but I’d wager any money that the _vast_ majority of them were written/drawn by heterosexual women… 😉 ---
**Author:** ![LadySybil](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c89c15/32.png) [@LadySybil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LadySybil)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2004, 3:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broadway-what-role-do-you-want-to-play/270529/102 "2004-10-25T03:28:54Z")
Lessee… Velma Kelly from _Chicago_ Nancy from _Oliver_ (and, if I still had the vocal range-damned tonsillitis surgery) Christine from \* The Phantom of the Opera \*. ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2004, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broadway-what-role-do-you-want-to-play/270529/103 "2004-10-25T17:21:58Z")
> [@Fenris](#): > > That’s cool, I wanted to be _Sky_ first–he can be Miss Adelade (we Norse-types gotta stick together!! 😉 😃 Why, Sky! As you can well see, I bear no resemblance to Miss Adelaide. Perhaps I should once again portray Benny, on account of having done it before. But that will not be a problem, in my estimation. And, if I recall correctly, it is Nicely and myself who get to sing the title song. Nicely, you may begin. _What’s playing at the Roxy? I’ll tell you what’s playing at the Roxy…_ ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2004, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broadway-what-role-do-you-want-to-play/270529/104 "2004-10-25T18:34:01Z")
> [@plnnr](#): > > If you’re saying that wasting alot on something that shouldn’t be taken seriously is a gay male stereortype, there’s going to be A LOT of Trekkies, Star Wars fans, LOTR geeks, RPG, etc. etc. etc. stuck in lots of closets for a long, long time. 😉 I can just picture that coming-out. “Join me, and I will complete your training.” (Or Chewie’s “Hrrrrrrrrrgh!”) ---
**Author:** ![Francesca](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/9fc348/32.png) [@Francesca](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Francesca)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2004, 6:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broadway-what-role-do-you-want-to-play/270529/105 "2004-10-25T18:47:35Z")
My god but I would _love_ to play **Mrs Lovett** from **Sweeney Todd**. I would love it so much. I know all the songs by heart. She’s just the most fun character. Failing that, **Lena Lamont** in **Singing In The Rain**. But I can’t _stannim_! ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2004, 7:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broadway-what-role-do-you-want-to-play/270529/106 "2004-10-25T19:13:30Z")
> [@Francesca](#): > > Failing that, **Lena Lamont** in **Singing In The Rain**. But I can’t _stannim_! “I make more money dan Calvin Coolidge—_put ta-gedder!_” ---
**Author:** ![Bricker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@Bricker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bricker)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2004, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broadway-what-role-do-you-want-to-play/270529/107 "2004-10-25T21:13:50Z")
> [@Otto](#): > > Seeing a Broadway show = activity for the masses. > > _Knowing about_ Broadway shows = frivolous waste of time on something that shouldn’t be taken seriously = gay male stereotype. There’s also a large dollop of the diva worship stereotype mixed in. > > Odd how no one ever pegs knowing every detail of the activities of men who run around in tight outfits touching each other (for example, football players) as faggy… Good point. If you know how many career yards rushing Walter Peyton had, that’s normal, he-man stuff. If you know that Bernadette Peters was the original “Ruby” in the off-Broadway premiere of “Dames at Sea,” then you’re ready to take up interior decorating, or something. I don’t get it. I used to hit New York once a month for half-price tickets to see shows. I may be one of a dozen people who have seen Betty Buckley in both Cats and Carrie, and Christiane Noll in both Jekyll & Hyde and Miss Saigon. But there’s nothing, so far as I can see, remotely GAY about it. It’s just… not. It’s unassociated with sex, completely. I used to participate on a message board in which I talked enthusiastically about shows and showtunes, and later learned that several of the other participants thought I was gay. It’s… a weird association. ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2004, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broadway-what-role-do-you-want-to-play/270529/108 "2004-10-25T21:42:53Z")
> [@Bricker](#): > > . . . Bernadette Peters . . . It’s unassociated with sex, completely. I don’t know. If you don’t associate Bernadette Peters with sex, I’d say there’s a chance you’re gay. I’d go into those woods if ya know what I mean. (Just as I typed that, I had an image of Bernadette reclining on a couch and expressing that she was ready to take all the woo I could pitch by saying to the maid “Send in the clown.”) ---
**Author:** ![Mauvaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mauvaise/32/11084_2.png) [@Mauvaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mauvaise)\ **Post date:** [October 26, 2004, 2:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broadway-what-role-do-you-want-to-play/270529/109 "2004-10-26T02:28:22Z")
> [@Bricker](#): > > If you know that Bernadette Peters was the original “Ruby” in the off-Broadway premiere of “Dames at Sea,” then you’re ready to take up interior decorating, or something… I not only know it, I have the cast album. And I’m straight. I’m also female, so I don’t know what that does to your theory. I do worship at the alter of Bernadette Peters. Hence my #1 choice for what role I’d want to play (pretending, of course, that I could actually sing and act): Dot in _Sunday in the Park with George_. But only if Mandy (sigh) was my co-star. I’d love to tackle the role of Eleanor in _The Lion in Winter_, but I can’t even bring myself to see the most recent Showtime version w/ Glenn Close because I think Kate Hepburn’s performace was the ONLY one to watch. I’d also like to play Fosca in _Passion_ The Baker’s Wife in _Into the Woods_ If you’re picking up a theme, it’s there: I also worship at the alter of Sondheim. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broadway-what-role-do-you-want-to-play/270529.md?page=5)