# Broken any laws lately? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [October 28, 2005, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broken-any-laws-lately/328332 "2005-10-28T16:25:29Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![TheLoadedDog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/35a633/32.png) [@TheLoadedDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheLoadedDog)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2005, 8:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broken-any-laws-lately/328332/21 "2005-10-28T20:46:59Z")
I was arrested a couple months back, and now I’m on bail awaiting trial. That good enough for ya? 😃 For this guy who’s never had so much as an overdue library book, let alone a traffic ticket, this was something of an interesting experience for me. I can’t comment too much as it is still a matter before the courts. All I can say is that the allegation against me is a minor one, and whilst I won’t say that the police didn’t take the complainant seriously, I can say that it is an area in which the police have to deal with a lot of vexatious complaints, and the arresting officers were as friendly as protocol allowed them to be under the circumstances, they did not bother handcuffing me, and… get this… whilst they had a bullwagon parked outside, they said, “you can follow us back to the station in your car, if you like.” Make of this what you will. Not going to bother wasting electrons on telling you I’m innocent, but we’ll just say I’m not terribly worried about it, and I think it’ll work out. ---
**Author:** ![The\_King\_of\_Soup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a87d85/32.png) [@The\_King\_of\_Soup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_King_of_Soup)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2005, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broken-any-laws-lately/328332/22 "2005-10-28T21:06:13Z")
> [@Sutremaine](#): > > Bolding mine. > > It’s flout, not flaunt. To flaunt something is to show it off. You’ve heard the phrase: “If you’ve got it, flaunt it”, yes? Maybe we need a phrase for this. “Louts flout…” …and I’m sure someone cleverer than I can come up with something that isn’t a random word that rhymes with ‘flaunt’. > > As for the topic at hand, I have never broken any state or federal laws in my life. 😃 You stole my curmudgeonly peeve. Try the word “taunt” in your mnemonic. ---
**Author:** ![randomlyblanks](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/71c47a/32.png) [@randomlyblanks](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/randomlyblanks)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2005, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broken-any-laws-lately/328332/23 "2005-10-28T21:17:35Z")
I was indicted today on 5 counts ranging from perjury to obstruction of justice before a federal grand jury, then I lost my job. ---
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2005, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broken-any-laws-lately/328332/24 "2005-10-28T21:17:55Z")
I try to break the law of gravity once or twice a day. ---
**Author:** ![Ghanima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Ghanima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ghanima)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2005, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broken-any-laws-lately/328332/25 "2005-10-28T21:22:54Z")
> [@randomlyblanks](#): > > I was indicted today on 5 counts ranging from perjury to obstruction of justice before a federal grand jury, then I lost my job. Karl? Is that you? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![NinjaChick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/71c47a/32.png) [@NinjaChick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NinjaChick)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2005, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broken-any-laws-lately/328332/26 "2005-10-28T21:36:02Z")
I, too, briefly violated laws of gravity today whilst on my bicycle. I also broke something like a dozen traffic laws, since if you’re on a bike you’re supposed to follow them all. I assume that that means yielding, stopping at stop signs, not running red lights, and not making illegal U-turns. But - hey, there are no cars coming, and I’m fairly certain that a Santa Fe cop isn’t going to materialize out of nowhere, and I’m absolutely sure they wouldn’t waste their time on me. ---
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2005, 10:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broken-any-laws-lately/328332/27 "2005-10-28T22:28:32Z")
I’m also frequently in violation of the Law of Averages and Murphy’s Law. I’ve considered turning myself into Law Enforcement Officials, but I fear the Law of Unintended Consequences. ---
**Author:** ![groman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/73ab20/32.png) [@groman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/groman)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2005, 10:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broken-any-laws-lately/328332/28 "2005-10-28T22:29:01Z")
State traffic, infraction, misdemeanor and felony laws every day. Federal felony laws a few times a week. A few international treaties. I mean… Just kidding _looks around nervously_ ---
**Author:** ![ryobserver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b2d939/32.png) [@ryobserver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ryobserver)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2005, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broken-any-laws-lately/328332/29 "2005-10-28T23:39:58Z")
I’ve been crossing the street on red lights a lot lately. Only when there’s no traffic coming–I’m an outlaw, I’m not stupid. In the morning it’s still dark when I walk to work, and I feel like a bit of a mugger magnet standing on the curb waiting for the green (though the risk of muggers on my usual route is minute, or I wouldn’t be using it). The rest of the day, well, standing on the curb while other people walk past me and blithely stroll across the street gets a bit old after awhile. Sometimes you just get fed up with trying to be a good example. ---
**Author:** ![iamthewalrus\_3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/258eb7/32.png) [@iamthewalrus\_3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iamthewalrus_3)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2005, 11:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broken-any-laws-lately/328332/30 "2005-10-28T23:54:59Z")
Thinking about it, I’m amazed that I’ve made it up to this point in the day without breaking any laws. I walked to work, so there are no minor traffic violations to worry about, and I haven’t really done anything but… work. Unless of course this code I’m working on is going to be used for nefarious purposes by my employer. I had an overdue library book, but I just returned it. ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2005, 1:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broken-any-laws-lately/328332/31 "2005-10-29T01:12:37Z")
I got a speeding ticket on Wed., and I drove today (I always speed). ---
**Author:** ![Antigen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/848f3c/32.png) [@Antigen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antigen)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2005, 2:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broken-any-laws-lately/328332/32 "2005-10-29T02:10:41Z")
I jaywalk all the time. But then, in Montreal, I think it’s illegal for a pedestrian to cross _with_ the light. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2005, 2:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broken-any-laws-lately/328332/33 "2005-10-29T02:31:35Z")
Today I happily flouted the “calories/carbs in \<= calories/carbs out” law on several occasions. ---
**Author:** ![elfbabe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b782af/32.png) [@elfbabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfbabe)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2005, 6:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broken-any-laws-lately/328332/34 "2005-10-29T06:45:33Z")
Like many other posters, I also jaywalk and sometimes fail to stop completely at a stop sign while riding a bicycle. … also, I eat babies. ---
**Author:** ![Black\_Train\_Song](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4da419/32.png) [@Black\_Train\_Song](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Black_Train_Song)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2005, 7:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broken-any-laws-lately/328332/35 "2005-10-29T07:00:11Z")
I drank a beer on public property while my dog pooped on it (public property, not my beer). ---
**Author:** ![chaoticbear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f07891/32.png) [@chaoticbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chaoticbear)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2005, 7:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broken-any-laws-lately/328332/36 "2005-10-29T07:42:09Z")
I went to a bar tonight and had a single shot of alcohol. In addition to that, I also almost always drive exactly 5 mph over the speed limit. ---
**Author:** ![SkipMagic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skipmagic/32/20706_2.png) [@SkipMagic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SkipMagic)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2005, 1:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broken-any-laws-lately/328332/37 "2005-10-29T13:20:34Z")
> [@elfbabe](#): > > … also, I eat babies. What, well-done? If so, that’s pretty damned unsophisticated. ---
**Author:** ![look\_ninjas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/b2d939/32.png) [@look\_ninjas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/look_ninjas)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2005, 2:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broken-any-laws-lately/328332/38 "2005-10-29T14:06:39Z")
My exhaust gave out on Monday, and rather than leaving my loud, loud, loud car at home, I’ve driven it to work every day this week. I even drove to biology class once. Today I mean to drive it again… to the mechanic, so it will hopefully stop being so loud. However, the very nice police officer who got the honor of pulling me over twenty minutes after said exhaust died said that it was okay, as long as I got it fixed as soon as I could afford to. So I’m really just doing what he told me to do. ---
**Author:** ![OtakuLoki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ac8455/32.png) [@OtakuLoki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OtakuLoki)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2005, 3:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broken-any-laws-lately/328332/39 "2005-10-29T15:05:18Z")
I have violated the international conventions about chemical and biological warfare. But, if it’s any consolation - I was in the area of effect of those gas bombs, too. (Air!!!) ---
**Author:** ![Phnord\_Prephect](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/df705f/32.png) [@Phnord\_Prephect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Phnord_Prephect)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2005, 5:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broken-any-laws-lately/328332/40 "2005-10-29T17:07:28Z")
I’ve discussed various illegal activities with numerous people on a messageboard on The Chicago Reader’s servers, thereby making us all guilty of conspiracy, as well as failure to report a crime. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broken-any-laws-lately/328332.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/broken-any-laws-lately/328332.md?page=3)