hee hee hee hee pliers …heee
dont forget to put 911 on speed dial 
If you dont have a real fryer, I suggest a huge dutch oven Heavy, hard to knock over, and tough.
Remember also that while having more oil may seem wasteful, it’s better for the flavor, temperature control, cooking time, and almost everything. And you can always reuse oil if you are careful (though I HATE washing things that have had hot oil in them). Of course, if you’re just going to set the oil on fire again, less is better. 
Well, kind of.
Things went much better this time. I just kept dropping little bits of onion in the pot until they started frying. Then I picked up the onion, dripping with batter, with 2 spoons and slowly lowered it. No explosions, no flying oil. I left it in for a few minutes and then just drained it out and dumped it on a plate. The only bad part is that none of the batter stayed on, so I’m basically dipping a fried onion in Ken’s Creamy Tomato Bacon dressing. Hell, I suspect matches would taste good dipped in this stuff.
Thanks for the advice again. Now what’s that flaming cherries dish?
I don’t know if there’s such a thing as an oil thermometer, but I use a candy thermometer when I deep fat fry. It comes with a clip so that you can fasten it to the side of the pot. Allow yourself plenty of time, use a larger pot than you think you’ll need and don’t wear long sleeves that can fall into the oil.
Congratulations Bruce_Daddy!!! Kudos on you fried Onion adventure. Sorry it didnt turn out quite the way you expected but at least no repeats of the freaked out cat episode.
Try this next time. Prepare the onion ring batter and set aside. Cut the onion the bloomin way, make sure its pretty dry then dredge it in flour. Basically toss flour into the thing until its kinda coated on every exposed surface. Get the oil hot just like the way you perfectly did it before then when the oil is hot enuf, dip the onion into the prepared batter, lift it out, let the excess batter drip into the bowl and carefully transfer into the oil. This may help the batter stick to it better. Good luck.
You might want to go to www.foodtv.com and get some easy recipes for beer batter onion rings. yuummmy.
Damn, I’d starve!
[sup]BOLDING ADDED[/sup]
DANGER WILL ROBINSON!!!
If you are going to use El Marko’s method, BE SURE TO WIPE OUT THE POT UNTIL IT IS COMPLETELY DRY.
Residual moisture, especially a thin coating of it on the sides and bottom of the pan, can cause what is known as “bumping.” Oil will trap a film of water on the sides of the wet pan. It will reside there (not mixing with the oil at all) until the pot’s wall temperature finally reaches water’s vaporization point. At that point, it will tend to liberate ALL AT ONCE.
This will cause a massive bubble or upwelling of vapor pressure from the bottom of the pan, CAUSING THE OIL TO GUSH UP AND OVER THE SIDES OF THE PAN IN ONE HUGE GOUT.
If you think your last stove fire was spectacular, wait until double the amount of very hot oil hits the element all at once. The results can be devastating.
Just a before-bed warning from a fellow cooking enthusiast.
This is going to be a fun weekend.
It’s a personal experience. Not as violently funny as yours by any means, just one of those that you remember with a grimace years later.