# Buddy, Friend, Confidant **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [June 8, 2025, 4:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/buddy-friend-confidant/1019321 "2025-06-08T04:42:28Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![DaveUnknown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/94ad74/32.png) [@DaveUnknown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DaveUnknown)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2025, 4:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/buddy-friend-confidant/1019321/1 "2025-06-08T04:42:28Z")
My (ex)brother in law used to talk about a “buddy” that had something, or a “buddy” that knew someone. I have a “friend” (or friends) that I like being around, that also know things ,and I like being around. I have “pal and a confidant” as per Andrew Gold’s song, a friend. I don’t like to use phrases like “Yeah, I got a buddy that…” Can someone qualify differences for me, plz? Thx ---
**Author:** ![kenobi\_65](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kenobi_65/32/13178_2.png) [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2025, 4:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/buddy-friend-confidant/1019321/2 "2025-06-08T04:58:48Z")
I doubt that there are quantitative, consistent differences in how people use those various terms to refer to friends. “Buddy” seems, to me, to suggest a good/close friend, but YMMV. FWIW, I use the term “friend” regularly, but rarely use “buddy,” and never use “pal.” ---
**Author:** ![Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmer_j.fudd/32/1211_2.png) [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elmer_J.Fudd)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2025, 4:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/buddy-friend-confidant/1019321/3 "2025-06-08T04:59:02Z")
“Buddy” is a euphemism for “don’t ask me how I know or how something will get done. Just trust me.” ---
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2025, 6:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/buddy-friend-confidant/1019321/4 "2025-06-08T06:01:34Z")
No idea, mate. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2025, 6:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/buddy-friend-confidant/1019321/5 "2025-06-08T06:10:04Z")
A buddy is the person you call when you need help showering after flesh eating viruses are chomping places on your body your Momma don’t need to see. A friend, you go to lunch with, exchange birthday cards, use as a personal reference. A confidante is your attorney. (If you want nothing ever, ever revealed). Don’t assume your BFF won’t give up your secrets with surprisingly little encouragement. ---
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2025, 9:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/buddy-friend-confidant/1019321/6 "2025-06-08T09:19:42Z")
A buddy will help you bury a body. ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2025, 11:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/buddy-friend-confidant/1019321/7 "2025-06-08T11:34:07Z")
One of my dogs is my buddy. The other’s too batshit crazy to care! ---
**Author:** ![Joey\_P](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/919ad9/32.png) [@Joey\_P](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Joey_P)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2025, 11:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/buddy-friend-confidant/1019321/8 "2025-06-08T11:37:12Z")
> [@don\_t\_ask](#): > > No idea, mate. I’m not your mate, pal. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2025, 12:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/buddy-friend-confidant/1019321/9 "2025-06-08T12:21:23Z")
> [@Joey\_P](#): > > I’m not your mate, pal. Never. . .ever. . .call me “pal”. . . ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2025, 1:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/buddy-friend-confidant/1019321/10 "2025-06-08T13:53:21Z")
Don’t ever call a stranger “bud” unless you want your teeth rearranged. > [@Don't call me bud, bud](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-call-me-bud-bud/1014792): > > On another forum i noted how attractive a lady in a sfw gif was and asked her name thusly; “whom is this minx?” The fellow who originally posted it replies with “who knows, its a GIF, bud” The lass was immediately identified by the next poster. Fuck you sanctimonious twat, you mother had a mouth like a combine harvester only with less discretion, and a snatch like a pile of freshly raked leaves. I am not now your bud, nor will I be in the future. I am not a 6 year old tee ball player (which… ---
**Author:** ![wolfpup](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpup/32/10618_2.png) [@wolfpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfpup)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2025, 2:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/buddy-friend-confidant/1019321/11 "2025-06-08T14:30:08Z")
So with “buddy”, “bud”, and “pal” ruled out, and “mate” ruled out on this side of the pond, it seems that “friend” is all we have left. “Confidante” sounds like something that should only be applied to an old lady on the receiving end of some juicy gossip being relayed over the phone by another old lady. In a television sitcom, this conversation would be relayed over a party line and overheard by a third party. ---
**Author:** ![madmonk28](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/madmonk28/32/20811_2.png) [@madmonk28](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madmonk28)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2025, 2:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/buddy-friend-confidant/1019321/12 "2025-06-08T14:45:40Z")
In the Shenandoah Valley, people use buddy the way others might use the word dude. The guy at the hardware store might say “ you need help loading that mulch in your truck, buddy?” Or someone might say “your tailight is out buddy.” ---
**Author:** ![solost](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/solost/32/11776_2.png) [@solost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/solost)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2025, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/buddy-friend-confidant/1019321/13 "2025-06-08T15:06:17Z")
So what I’m getting from this thread is that if a stranger calls you ‘buddy’ it could be friendly, aggressive or neutral. It just depends on context. But if a stranger hits you with a ‘hey chief’, I think we can all agree that that’s never good. ---
**Author:** ![Ellecram](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ellecram/32/18948_2.png) [@Ellecram](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ellecram)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2025, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/buddy-friend-confidant/1019321/14 "2025-06-08T15:10:58Z")
> [@madmonk28](#): > > In the Shenandoah Valley, people use buddy the way others might use the word dude. The guy at the hardware store might say “ you need help loading that mulch in your truck, buddy?” Or someone might say “your tailight is out buddy.” I visit my family in Winchester, Virginia frequently and will often be addressed transactionally as “Darlin’”. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2025, 3:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/buddy-friend-confidant/1019321/15 "2025-06-08T15:34:25Z")
Or, sweetheart, hon and a surprising one; a nurse practitioner once called me _“Sis”_, like “Sis, can you comfortably turn to the left?” ---
**Author:** ![markn\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f9ae1b/32.png) [@markn\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/markn_1)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2025, 3:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/buddy-friend-confidant/1019321/16 "2025-06-08T15:43:53Z")
> [@Chefguy](#): > > Never. . .ever. . .call me “pal”. . . Ok bro. ---
**Author:** ![markn\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f9ae1b/32.png) [@markn\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/markn_1)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2025, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/buddy-friend-confidant/1019321/17 "2025-06-08T17:04:13Z")
“Pal” seems like such a quintessentially American word, so it was surprising to me to learn that it has a rather exotic origin: it derives from a Romani word, which ultimately derives from Sanskrit. It was first used in English in the eighteenth century, in England, not America. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2025, 5:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/buddy-friend-confidant/1019321/18 "2025-06-08T17:26:27Z")
Thanks, pardner. ---
**Author:** ![Exapno\_Mapcase](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/exapno_mapcase/32/1051_2.png) [@Exapno\_Mapcase](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Exapno_Mapcase)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2025, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/buddy-friend-confidant/1019321/19 "2025-06-08T19:27:55Z")
Chum, soul mate, comrade, crony, sidekick, compeer, bro, cuz, roomie, dude, chap, fellow, guy, lad, homie, kid. Thanks, [thesaurus.com](http://thesaurus.com). English is an amazing language. What’s the difference between all these? Whatever’s in your head. That’s also part of English being an amazing language. ---
**Author:** ![OldOlds](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/a3d4f5/32.png) [@OldOlds](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OldOlds)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2025, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/buddy-friend-confidant/1019321/20 "2025-06-08T19:45:12Z")
I use buddy regularly. For me it is a real friend, as opposed to that guy I sometimes talk to at work that I like OK. He’s just a friend. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/buddy-friend-confidant/1019321.md?page=2)