# Build-a-limerick **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 13, 2005, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-a-limerick/335457 "2005-12-13T19:19:12Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![Daithi\_Lacha](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/daithi_lacha/32/5430_2.png) [@Daithi\_Lacha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Daithi_Lacha)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2005, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-a-limerick/335457/141 "2005-12-15T15:33:51Z")
> [@Daithi Lacha](#): > > Her decolletage My bad – that should have been the line after " … gold lame gown." ---
**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2005, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-a-limerick/335457/142 "2005-12-15T15:35:12Z")
Do I get to pick which line is used? 🙂 Because an ode to my decolletage would make my day. ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2005, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-a-limerick/335457/143 "2005-12-15T15:36:18Z")
> [@Draelin](#): > > Do I get to pick which line is used? 🙂 Because an ode to my decolletage would make my day. Go for it. ---
**Author:** ![Daithi\_Lacha](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/daithi_lacha/32/5430_2.png) [@Daithi\_Lacha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Daithi_Lacha)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2005, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-a-limerick/335457/144 "2005-12-15T15:36:41Z")
> [@Draelin](#): > > Do I get to pick which line is used? 🙂 Because an ode to my decolletage would make my day. I vote “yea.” ---
**Author:** ![DeVena](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/dec6dc/32.png) [@DeVena](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DeVena)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2005, 3:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-a-limerick/335457/145 "2005-12-15T15:38:36Z")
OK then… Draelin once came in to town Wearing a sexy gold lame gown > [@Daithi Lacha](#): > > Her decolletage Gave everyone pause ---
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2005, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-a-limerick/335457/146 "2005-12-15T15:48:45Z")
> [@DeVena](#): > > OK then… > > Draelin once came in to town > Wearing a sexy gold lame gown > > Her decolletage > > Gave everyone pause After the bodice fell down! :eek: There once was a 'pliance repair man ---
**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2005, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-a-limerick/335457/147 "2005-12-15T15:53:04Z")
> [@eleanorigby](#): > > After the bodice fell down! You guys all _rawk_. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![buttonjockey308](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bcef8e/32.png) [@buttonjockey308](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buttonjockey308)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2005, 4:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-a-limerick/335457/148 "2005-12-15T16:10:45Z")
There once was a 'pliance repair man **who’s hobby was collecting beer cans** ---
**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2005, 4:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-a-limerick/335457/149 "2005-12-15T16:11:57Z")
> [@buttonjockey308](#): > > There once was a 'pliance repair man > > **who’s hobby was collecting beer cans** He fixed **Rigs’s** dryer … ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2005, 4:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-a-limerick/335457/150 "2005-12-15T16:14:26Z")
> [@Draelin](#): > > He fixed **Rigs’s** dryer … Accompanied by a choir ---
**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2005, 4:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-a-limerick/335457/151 "2005-12-15T16:21:11Z")
Page Two’s complete limericks … A young lad from Kalamazoo Mixed turtle and dragonfly poo The ladies came runnin’ As the young man was sunnin’ It was a hell of a hullabaloo. A clever young Doper named **Zoe** Had a pet kangaroo she called Joey. She taught it to swim With vigor and vim And to go-ey along with the flow-ey. Said a man who sat down on a tack, “I must find the culprit and give him a smack!” For the tack pierced my hiney And gave me a tiny Prick to go with my crack! A man with a big can of lard Was okay till the big can got jarred He clung to his can And hung on like a man But his soul, not his body, was scarred. A giraffe went cavorting one day He romped through a big pile of hay The hay made him achoo!! No – 'tis twoo! 'tis twoo! And his nose was congested all day. There was a bartender named Mabel Who could drink anyone under the table Straight from the bottle she drank Then let fly a burp that did stank Whatcha expect – a damn fable? **Swampy** and **lieu** went to China Dressed as Burt Reynolds and Dinah Said **Swampy** , “See here,” Neither’s burly, I fear. But you know me – I’m no whineah. A preacher was pounding his pulpit Accusations were flying as was spit He called for repentance (a pretty stiff sentence) And his sermon got moved to The Pit. **or** as stiff as those things will git The mailman making his rounds When he found a Peter Paul Mounds But he felt like a nut And it entered his gut And proceded to pack on the pounds. A politico, running for election, Showed congress a Christmas erection Get your mind from the gutter, you pervs It’s sparkles and winkles and curves, It’s a common enough prediliction. ---
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2005, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-a-limerick/335457/152 "2005-12-15T17:15:03Z")
Accompanied by a choir Who sang out, yes! You can, can! ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2005, 5:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-a-limerick/335457/153 "2005-12-15T17:53:54Z")
Oh! That finishes it! :smack: There once was a 'pliance repair man who’s hobby was collecting beer cans He fixed Rigs’s dryer … Accompanied by a choir Who sang out, yes! You can, can! So, new one: _While perusing the Straight Dope one day…_ ---
**Author:** ![The\_Weird\_One](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7bcc69/32.png) [@The\_Weird\_One](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Weird_One)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2005, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-a-limerick/335457/154 "2005-12-15T17:56:27Z")
> [@twickster](#): > > While perusing the Straight Dope one day… I was quite overcome with dismay ---
**Author:** ![Daithi\_Lacha](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/daithi_lacha/32/5430_2.png) [@Daithi\_Lacha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Daithi_Lacha)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2005, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-a-limerick/335457/155 "2005-12-15T18:06:16Z")
> [@The Weird One](#): > > I was quite overcome with dismay The hampsters were tired ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2005, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-a-limerick/335457/156 "2005-12-15T18:09:36Z")
Page 3 Limericks. Whew! That was work! This week in the ol’ MMP A heart attack Bumba had he The Frostys are mating And Santa’s deflating While Taters’s a little bitchy. A lover of moo goo gai pan Would certainly never eat flan When faced with the custard She got out some mustard And frightened the flan till it ran. This thread still has wondrous legs… So let’s order a couple of kegs I’ll bring some pie, Some homemade Shoo Fly Or maybe we’ll scramble some eggs. twickster went down to Peru And was offered quite a strange brew The visions came flyin’ (One involved a lion) And then did much penis ensue. An ogre, a cat and a gator Wondered which was the best commentator This passel of pundits Spouted all kinds of tidbits Then gobbled down Madden with 'taters. If Cecil had dated my GrannyInstead of my dear old Aunt Fanny Our family reunions Would be mass confusions The resemblance between them’s uncanny. Draelin once came in to town Wearing a sexy gold lame gown Her decolletage Gave everyone pause After the bodice fell down! There once was a 'pliance repair man Who’s hobby was collecting beer cans He fixed Rigs’s dryer Accompanied by a choir Who sang out, yes! You can, can! ---
**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2005, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-a-limerick/335457/157 "2005-12-15T18:10:37Z")
> [@Daithi Lacha](#): > > The hampsters were tired The servers were mired ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2005, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-a-limerick/335457/158 "2005-12-15T18:10:38Z")
> [@Daithi Lacha](#): > > The hampsters were tired So new ones were hired ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2005, 6:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-a-limerick/335457/159 "2005-12-15T18:12:42Z")
Dang! > [@Draelin](#): > > The servers were mired And I couldn’t Dope all day. ---
**Author:** ![Earthworm\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f07891/32.png) [@Earthworm\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Earthworm_Jim)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2005, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-a-limerick/335457/160 "2005-12-15T18:16:26Z")
> [@Draelin](#): > > The servers were mired And for membership I had to pay! > [@swampbear](#): > > So new ones were hired Now **hamsters** serve up the soiree [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-a-limerick/335457.md?page=7) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-a-limerick/335457.md?page=9)