# Build The Great Conspiracy **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 13, 2001, 12:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-the-great-conspiracy/61828 "2001-04-13T12:57:28Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![Wolverine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/ba9def/32.png) [@Wolverine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wolverine)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2001, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-the-great-conspiracy/61828/101 "2001-04-20T20:23:05Z")
…New Jersey, which nobody missed anyways because recently… ---
**Author:** ![Tripler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripler/32/21807_2.png) [@Tripler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tripler)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2001, 9:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-the-great-conspiracy/61828/102 "2001-04-20T21:44:17Z")
. . . the Carolinas declared war on them because New Jersey is whipping them in the playoffs, which makes everyone realize that New Jersey _is_ pretty cool, beguiling Congress to . . . ---
**Author:** ![aviddiva](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a88e57/32.png) [@aviddiva](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aviddiva)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2001, 10:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-the-great-conspiracy/61828/103 "2001-04-20T22:52:56Z")
forget all about them and commence plans to build a new animatronic robot to replace George W. Bush in four years, as the Al Gore one is getting a tad rusty. However, the designers of the new model… ---
**Author:** ![Tranquilis](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tranquilis/32/3639_2.png) [@Tranquilis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tranquilis)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2001, 12:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-the-great-conspiracy/61828/104 "2001-04-21T00:15:50Z")
…are software engineers from Redmond, Washington, and they forgot to… ---
**Author:** ![Tripler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripler/32/21807_2.png) [@Tripler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tripler)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2001, 12:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-the-great-conspiracy/61828/105 "2001-04-21T00:31:44Z")
. . . inform the NSA to tell the blue aliens that the software package onboard the prototype robot would. . . ---
**Author:** ![aviddiva](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a88e57/32.png) [@aviddiva](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aviddiva)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2001, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-the-great-conspiracy/61828/106 "2001-04-21T00:54:13Z")
look and sound a lot like Dr. Laura. Accordingly,… ---
**Author:** ![Verrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/46a35a/32.png) [@Verrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Verrain)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2001, 1:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-the-great-conspiracy/61828/107 "2001-04-21T01:01:21Z")
… all the people out there “shacking up” form an angry mob and… ---
**Author:** ![moronmountain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b19c9b/32.png) [@moronmountain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/moronmountain)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2001, 1:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-the-great-conspiracy/61828/108 "2001-04-21T01:09:40Z")
…feeding salt licks to the deer, causing a massive… ---
**Author:** ![Tranquilis](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tranquilis/32/3639_2.png) [@Tranquilis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tranquilis)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2001, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-the-great-conspiracy/61828/109 "2001-04-21T20:03:07Z")
…change in the salinity of run-off, which, combined with Sally Strother’s tears, radically raises ocean salinity. disturbed, Aquaman leaves the lovenest he shares with the little mermaid… ---
**Author:** ![PlanMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/2bfe46/32.png) [@PlanMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PlanMan)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2001, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-the-great-conspiracy/61828/110 "2001-04-21T21:02:27Z")
… who becomes so angry, she unleashes a horde of rabid sea monkeys … ---
**Author:** ![moronmountain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b19c9b/32.png) [@moronmountain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/moronmountain)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2001, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-the-great-conspiracy/61828/111 "2001-04-21T22:10:59Z")
…which devour every last plankton in the world’s oceans. Which wouldn’t really be a problem, except… ---
**Author:** ![PlanMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/2bfe46/32.png) [@PlanMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PlanMan)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2001, 11:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-the-great-conspiracy/61828/112 "2001-04-21T23:44:25Z")
… which caused the ice cream and perfume industries to go bankrupt for lace of agar. The resulting financial panic … ---
**Author:** ![PlanMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/2bfe46/32.png) [@PlanMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PlanMan)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2001, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-the-great-conspiracy/61828/113 "2001-04-21T23:45:47Z")
for **lack** of agar ---
**Author:** ![moronmountain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b19c9b/32.png) [@moronmountain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/moronmountain)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2001, 2:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-the-great-conspiracy/61828/114 "2001-04-22T02:13:40Z")
Allowed Planters™ to gain a monopoly. Antitrust laws being what they are, however, made… ---
**Author:** ![Mercutio](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/51bf81/32.png) [@Mercutio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mercutio)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2001, 8:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-the-great-conspiracy/61828/115 "2001-04-22T08:52:14Z")
…it almost impossible for someone from L.A. to mock a Redwings fan, but that is besides the point (Ha ha, **JoeyHemlock** ). The real point is that the anti-trust also caused all cans of Tuna-safe dolphin to become… ---
**Author:** ![ryoushi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/85f322/32.png) [@ryoushi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ryoushi)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2001, 9:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-the-great-conspiracy/61828/116 "2001-04-22T09:38:10Z")
…SDMB moderators, so they could infiltrate the head office of Industrial Light and Magic and… ---
**Author:** ![Airman\_Doors\_USAF](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e36b37/32.png) [@Airman\_Doors\_USAF](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Airman_Doors_USAF)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2001, 11:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-the-great-conspiracy/61828/117 "2001-04-22T11:22:02Z")
Designed an animatronic robot, who replaced George Bush. Meanwhile, in Anaheim… ---
**Author:** ![Eutychus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a3d4f5/32.png) [@Eutychus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eutychus)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2001, 11:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-the-great-conspiracy/61828/118 "2001-04-22T11:25:36Z")
… Grandma had her hands full beating off the Indians. The Indians … ---
**Author:** ![Tripler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripler/32/21807_2.png) [@Tripler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tripler)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2001, 1:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-the-great-conspiracy/61828/119 "2001-04-22T13:45:59Z")
… reverent in their ancient traditions, whip out their Citibank ™ Visa cards and attempt to “charge it” so they can keep cash and afford to … ---
**Author:** ![moronmountain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b19c9b/32.png) [@moronmountain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/moronmountain)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2001, 5:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-the-great-conspiracy/61828/120 "2001-04-22T17:03:43Z")
…buy back Long Island for $26, plus a few centuries of compund interest at 8.625%. They, oddly, succeed, and the residents of Long Island are… [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-the-great-conspiracy/61828.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/build-the-great-conspiracy/61828.md?page=7)