# Bullying. \[should parents be held accountable?\] **URL:** \ **Category:** Great Debates\ **Created:** [March 7, 2019, 5:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bullying-should-parents-be-held-accountable/830712 "2019-03-07T17:58:43Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Jamiedarke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/3da27b/32.png) [@Jamiedarke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jamiedarke)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2019, 5:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bullying-should-parents-be-held-accountable/830712/1 "2019-03-07T17:58:43Z")
Bullying in school and more especially online is totally vile. Should the parents of kids guilty of bullying have some sort of a charge laid against them by the police? ---
**Author:** ![Translucent\_Daydream](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/translucent_daydream/32/16170_2.png) [@Translucent\_Daydream](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Translucent_Daydream)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2019, 6:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bullying-should-parents-be-held-accountable/830712/2 "2019-03-07T18:02:23Z")
> [@Jamiedarke](#): > > Bullying in school and more especially online is totally vile. > > Should the parents of kids guilty of bullying have some sort of a charge laid against them by the police? Welcome to the Dope, looks like you are new. This OP might not be in the correct place, maybe more like IMHO. What is exactly bullying though? What is the definition that you are using? I ask because what I grew up with and what is being called bullying today seem to be different things. Perhaps if everyone could agree on what bullying is, that would be the first step in stopping it. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2019, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bullying-should-parents-be-held-accountable/830712/3 "2019-03-07T18:11:46Z")
Your definition of “bullying” is needed, as well as the charges you would have the parents file with the police. ---
**Author:** ![Slash1972](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slash1972/32/6461_2.png) [@Slash1972](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slash1972)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2019, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bullying-should-parents-be-held-accountable/830712/4 "2019-03-07T18:16:30Z")
There is no such thing as online bullying. ---
**Author:** ![Jamiedarke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/3da27b/32.png) [@Jamiedarke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jamiedarke)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2019, 6:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bullying-should-parents-be-held-accountable/830712/5 "2019-03-07T18:18:13Z")
OK ---
**Author:** ![Jamiedarke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/3da27b/32.png) [@Jamiedarke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jamiedarke)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2019, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bullying-should-parents-be-held-accountable/830712/6 "2019-03-07T18:20:19Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#): > > Your definition of “bullying” is needed, as well as the charges you would have the parents file with the police. Cyberbullying or cyberharassment is a form of bullying or harassment using electronic means. Cyberbullying and cyberharassment are also known as online bullying. It has become increasingly common, especially among teenagers.[1] Cyberbullying is when someone, typically teens, bully or harass others on social media sites. Harmful bullying behavior can include posting rumors, threats, sexual remarks, a victims’ personal information, or pejorative labels (i.e., hate speech).[2] Bullying or harassment can be identified by repeated behavior and an intent to harm.[3] Victims may have lower self-esteem, increased suicidal ideation, and a variety of emotional responses, including being scared, frustrated, angry, and depressed. Wikipeadia. ---
**Author:** ![Jamiedarke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/3da27b/32.png) [@Jamiedarke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jamiedarke)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2019, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bullying-should-parents-be-held-accountable/830712/7 "2019-03-07T18:21:41Z")
> [@Slash1972](#): > > There is no such thing as online bullying. Citizen Manson … Tell that to the families of the many teens who have commited suicide and been encouraged to do so by cyber bullies. ---
**Author:** ![Slash1972](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slash1972/32/6461_2.png) [@Slash1972](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slash1972)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2019, 6:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bullying-should-parents-be-held-accountable/830712/8 "2019-03-07T18:24:32Z")
> [@Jamiedarke](#): > > Citizen Manson … Tell that to the families of the many teens who have commited suicide and been encouraged to do so by cyber bullies. Sorry, one of the things I’ve learned here is that it’s not a good idea to blame the victim AFTER they’ve been victimized. ---
**Author:** ![Jamiedarke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/3da27b/32.png) [@Jamiedarke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jamiedarke)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2019, 6:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bullying-should-parents-be-held-accountable/830712/9 "2019-03-07T18:24:41Z")
> [@Translucent\_Daydream](#): > > Welcome to the Dope, looks like you are new. This OP might not be in the correct place, maybe more like IMHO. > > What is exactly bullying though? What is the definition that you are using? I ask because what I grew up with and what is being called bullying today seem to be different things. Perhaps if everyone could agree on what bullying is, that would be the first step in stopping it. I thought I could ask a question in a Forum called General Questions. Sorry. My mistake. ---
**Author:** ![Slash1972](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slash1972/32/6461_2.png) [@Slash1972](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slash1972)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2019, 6:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bullying-should-parents-be-held-accountable/830712/10 "2019-03-07T18:26:33Z")
> [@Jamiedarke](#): > > I thought I could ask a question in a Forum called General Questions. > > Sorry. > > My mistake. General Questions is more for questions that have factual answers. Your OP seems more like you are looking for opinions of others. ---
**Author:** ![Omar\_Little](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/omar_little/32/269_2.png) [@Omar\_Little](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omar_Little)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2019, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bullying-should-parents-be-held-accountable/830712/11 "2019-03-07T18:36:21Z")
> [@Slash1972](#): > > Sorry, one of the things I’ve learned here is that it’s not a good idea to blame the victim AFTER they’ve been victimized. Yeah, that’s about 75% of the world’s population. ---
**Author:** ![MDfive21](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ecc23a/32.png) [@MDfive21](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MDfive21)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2019, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bullying-should-parents-be-held-accountable/830712/12 "2019-03-07T18:40:05Z")
my answer/opinion is NO, there should not be criminal charges for bullying, in-person or online. a trip to the principal’s office and the school counselor, yes of course. but i would not wish the criminal justice hammer of the state upon any teenager for any non-bodily crime. and even a typical schoolyard fight should be under the jurisdiction of the school, not the state. see you in GD… ---
**Author:** ![Translucent\_Daydream](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/translucent_daydream/32/16170_2.png) [@Translucent\_Daydream](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Translucent_Daydream)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2019, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bullying-should-parents-be-held-accountable/830712/13 "2019-03-07T18:48:34Z")
Okay lets look at this differently. Say some jackass tells me that I suck, nobody likes me, blah blah. I’m not going to commit suicide over it, but someone else might. What is the difference between me and the other person that would be driven to suicide? I’m not making light of the situation at all, but I am more drawn to figure out what makes people want to end it all over whats on a computer screen. I grew up before the internet was more than AOL messenger and Napster, so I probably lack the perspective that these kiddos have, but at the same time, isn’t it the job of parents to instill some self confidence or something in their children? ---
**Author:** ![Translucent\_Daydream](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/translucent_daydream/32/16170_2.png) [@Translucent\_Daydream](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Translucent_Daydream)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2019, 6:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bullying-should-parents-be-held-accountable/830712/14 "2019-03-07T18:54:09Z")
> [@Jamiedarke](#): > > I thought I could ask a question in a Forum called General Questions. > > Sorry. > > My mistake. No need to apologize to me, buddy. It took me a while to wrap my head around the forums as well. If the mods move your thread around, this is why. This forum is more for questions like “Why does the sky have a blue color to it during the day?” There is a real, concise answer to that question. Something like “What were the causes of The American Great Depression?” would have answers that have a lot of debate built in. That would be for Great Debates. ---
**Author:** ![AHunter3](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ahunter3/32/368_2.png) [@AHunter3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AHunter3)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2019, 6:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bullying-should-parents-be-held-accountable/830712/15 "2019-03-07T18:59:09Z")
Students should be allowed to file charges against other students and have the case heard by a jury of their peers (other students). That would be far more effective than adult intervention. ---
**Author:** ![engineer\_comp\_geek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/engineer_comp_geek/32/504_2.png) [@engineer\_comp\_geek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/engineer_comp_geek)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2019, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bullying-should-parents-be-held-accountable/830712/16 "2019-03-07T19:40:02Z")
**Moderator Action** > [@Jamiedarke](#): > > I thought I could ask a question in a Forum called General Questions. General Questions, despite the name, is for questions of a factual nature. The name dates back to when there were comments on Cecil’s columns, and general (factual) questions, and that was about it. With all of the other forums we have now, the name is admittedly a bit confusing, but think of it as the forum for general but factual questions. It’s no biggie. It takes folks a while to figure out exactly what forum is for what. I’ll just move this to a more appropriate forum. If you are looking for opinions, the correct forum is IMHO. If it’s something that you want to debate, the Great Debates is the correct forum. Sometimes opinions turn into debates, and sometimes debates don’t end up so much of a debate and end up just being a few people expressing opinions instead. So sometimes it’s difficult to figure out where to post something like this. I think there’s enough meat here for a good debate, so I’ll take a shot and give this a chance in Great Debates. If it doesn’t do well in that forum, the mods there can punt it over to IMHO. Moving thread from GQ to Great Debates. ETA: I have also edited the title to more clearly indicate the topic. ---
**Author:** ![engineer\_comp\_geek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/engineer_comp_geek/32/504_2.png) [@engineer\_comp\_geek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/engineer_comp_geek)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2019, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bullying-should-parents-be-held-accountable/830712/17 "2019-03-07T19:48:55Z")
**Moderator Note** > [@Slash1972](#): > > There is no such thing as online bullying. This is so far outside of the realm of what most people believe that it comes across as trolling. I don’t know you well enough to know if you really do believe something this bizarre, so I’ll give you the benefit of the doubt here and won’t issue a warning for trolling. But dude, you are way out there with this one. ---
**Author:** ![Slash1972](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slash1972/32/6461_2.png) [@Slash1972](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slash1972)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2019, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bullying-should-parents-be-held-accountable/830712/18 "2019-03-07T20:03:33Z")
> [@engineer\_comp\_geek](#): > > **Moderator Note** > > This is so far outside of the realm of what most people believe that it comes across as trolling. I don’t know you well enough to know if you really do believe something this bizarre, so I’ll give you the benefit of the doubt here and won’t issue a warning for trolling. > > But dude, you are way out there with this one. Really? You can find my other posts with regards to cyber bullying to see that I am sincere in my belief. In my opinion, there is no such thing as cyber bullying. It’s the same stance I hold in any thread about bullying. If there was such a thing as cyber bullying, and it was illegal, then there are numerous posters in the Pit who would be breaking the law. ---
**Author:** ![Bone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bone/32/407_2.png) [@Bone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bone)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2019, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bullying-should-parents-be-held-accountable/830712/19 "2019-03-07T20:05:09Z")
> [@Slash1972](#): > > There is no such thing as online bullying. [In CA, there is.](http://leginfo.legislature.ca.gov/faces/codes_displaySection.xhtml?lawCode=EDC§ionNum=48900.) > [@](#): > > (r) Engaged in an act of bullying. For purposes of this subdivision, the following terms have the following meanings: > > (1) **“Bullying” means any severe or pervasive physical or verbal act or conduct,** including communications made in writing **or by means of an electronic act** , and including one or more acts committed by a pupil or group of pupils as defined in Section 48900.2, 48900.3, or 48900.4, directed toward one or more pupils that has or can be reasonably predicted to have the effect of one or more of the following: > > (A) Placing a reasonable pupil or pupils in fear of harm to that pupil’s or those pupils’ person or property. > > (B) Causing a reasonable pupil to experience a substantially detrimental effect on his or her physical or mental health. > > (C) Causing a reasonable pupil to experience substantial interference with his or her academic performance. > > (D) Causing a reasonable pupil to experience substantial interference with his or her ability to participate in or benefit from the services, activities, or privileges provided by a school. There are[similar laws](https://leginfo.legislature.ca.gov/faces/codes_displaySection.xhtml?lawCode=PEN§ionNum=653.2) that aren’t directed at student populations, but don’t use the exact term “bullying”. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2019, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bullying-should-parents-be-held-accountable/830712/20 "2019-03-07T20:20:28Z")
To answer the OP. No, I do not think parents should be fined or otherwise punished. The student should definitely be punished for bullying. Parents should be notified and taken to task. I’ve seen a lot of bullying and who ever the kid is or how they are raised it’s upsetting. No kid should have to endure that at school or online. I really don’t think you can stop it completely. Kids will just get more sneaky. But authorities and school admin. should nip it where they can. IMO [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bullying-should-parents-be-held-accountable/830712.md?page=2)