# Bush Again: My job is to lift mens souls **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 9, 2007, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-again-my-job-is-to-lift-mens-souls/403440 "2007-05-09T19:37:11Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2007, 10:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-again-my-job-is-to-lift-mens-souls/403440/21 "2007-05-09T22:38:48Z")
Well, he’s got applicable experience. He’s already arranged for lifting many men’s souls into the hereafter. ---
**Author:** ![Merijeek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f05b48/32.png) [@Merijeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Merijeek)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2007, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-again-my-job-is-to-lift-mens-souls/403440/22 "2007-05-09T22:43:36Z")
[QUOTE=Marley23] We’ve seen how good he is at THAT job. Maybe he’ll be a better uplifter. [/QUOTE] Has he come up with “I’m the Lifterupper”, yet? -Joe ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2007, 10:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-again-my-job-is-to-lift-mens-souls/403440/23 "2007-05-09T22:54:36Z")
[QUOTE=Merijeek] Has he come up with “I’m the Lifterupper”, yet? -Joe [/QUOTE] He wanted to say “I’m the Quicker Lifterupper” but the gnarled and rotted corpse of Nancy Walker said she’d haunt him until the Judgment Day if he dared besmirch her precious Bounty… And now I have an indelible image of Bush besmirching Nancy Walker’s “bounty” stuck in front of my mind’s eye. Brain bleach! ---
**Author:** ![11811](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/1/9d8465/32.png) [@11811](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/11811)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2007, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-again-my-job-is-to-lift-mens-souls/403440/24 "2007-05-09T23:51:46Z")
[QUOTE=DanBlather] “my job here is to lift men’s souls” [/QUOTE] Andre the Giant should have been given a role in the Bush White House: You keep using words. I do not think they mean what you think they mean. ---
**Author:** ![Enter\_the\_Flagon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b9bd4f/32.png) [@Enter\_the\_Flagon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enter_the_Flagon)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2007, 11:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-again-my-job-is-to-lift-mens-souls/403440/25 "2007-05-09T23:55:32Z")
This slogan might be adaptable to his next career: tow truck operator. “My job is to lift men’s cars.” ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2007, 11:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-again-my-job-is-to-lift-mens-souls/403440/26 "2007-05-09T23:56:17Z")
[QUOTE=MN\_Maenad] Somehow, this makes the Prez sound like a Playtex 18-hour bra. [/QUOTE] Well, he is surrounded by stupid tits. ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2007, 12:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-again-my-job-is-to-lift-mens-souls/403440/27 "2007-05-10T00:25:17Z")
[QUOTE=Revtim] “But not women’s souls. Not sure they even have ‘em. Think the scriptures say sumthin’ about women having a little piece of a soul donated by Adam. It was stuck to the rib. Bein’ small, it should get caught in the updraft of the men’s souls gettin’ uplifted. I’m the uplifter!” [/QUOTE] I think he’s supposed to lift women’s dresses. ---
**Author:** ![DanBlather](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/f4b2a3/32.png) [@DanBlather](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DanBlather)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2007, 12:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-again-my-job-is-to-lift-mens-souls/403440/28 "2007-05-10T00:28:04Z")
[QUOTE=Kalhoun] I think he’s supposed to lift women’s dresses. [/QUOTE] That was Clinton. ---
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2007, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-again-my-job-is-to-lift-mens-souls/403440/29 "2007-05-10T00:54:50Z")
[QUOTE=AskNott] You’re all spelling soles wrong. The president wants to steal our shoes. 😉 [/QUOTE] _Shoes for industry! Shoes for the dead! Shoes for industry!_ ---
**Author:** ![Aeschines](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aeschines/32/16251_2.png) [@Aeschines](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aeschines)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2007, 4:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-again-my-job-is-to-lift-mens-souls/403440/30 "2007-05-10T04:35:14Z")
Can Bush handle being _both_ the Decider and the Uplifter?Of course he can! ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2007, 4:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-again-my-job-is-to-lift-mens-souls/403440/31 "2007-05-10T04:41:15Z")
> [@](#): > > Perhaps you are reading a bit much into the President’s statement? It’s been six years. Shouldn’t he know how to be President by now? I swear if this guy had been hired by Burger King in 2000, he still be trying to figure out how to work the french fry machine. ---
**Author:** ![Terrifel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c68b51/32.png) [@Terrifel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Terrifel)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2007, 10:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-again-my-job-is-to-lift-mens-souls/403440/32 "2007-05-10T10:23:13Z")
[QUOTE=Little Nemo] It’s been six years. Shouldn’t he know how to be President by now? I swear if this guy had been hired by Burger King in 2000, he still be trying to figure out how to work the french fry machine. [/QUOTE] “Look, I already told you: hold the pickles, hold the lettuce! If you’re not going to make this burger my way, then I refuse to pay.” “Too bad… See that note I wrote at the end of your receipt? It says I don’t have to pay any attention to your damn order. My accountability moment’s over. Who’s behind the counter here anyway? I’m the Burger King! I’m the Flame-Broilerer!” ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2007, 11:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-again-my-job-is-to-lift-mens-souls/403440/33 "2007-05-10T11:31:48Z")
[QUOTE=RTFirefly] _Shoes for industry! Shoes for the dead! Shoes for industry!_ [/QUOTE] FIresign Theater? Is that _you_?? ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2007, 1:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-again-my-job-is-to-lift-mens-souls/403440/34 "2007-05-10T13:43:09Z")
[QUOTE=Kalhoun] FIresign Theater? Is that _you_?? [/QUOTE] He’s no fun – he fell right over. ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Amazing](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6de8d8/32.png) [@Captain\_Amazing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Amazing)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2007, 2:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-again-my-job-is-to-lift-mens-souls/403440/35 "2007-05-10T14:45:28Z")
Well, to be fair to Bush, I don’t know that he’s entirely wrong here. I mean, he can divert federal resources to Kansas from his office, but the modern presidency does seem to have taken on the duties of “Counselor-in-Chief”. Nowadays, when there’s some big tragedy, there seems to be the expectation that the president visit the damaged area and make a speech about it, to lift the spirits of the people suffering and remind them that the rest of the nation is with them. ---
**Author:** ![Sean\_Factotum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/50afbb/32.png) [@Sean\_Factotum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sean_Factotum)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2007, 2:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-again-my-job-is-to-lift-mens-souls/403440/36 "2007-05-10T14:47:55Z")
[QUOTE=EddyTeddyFreddy] He’s no fun – he fell right over. [/QUOTE] _George Danger - Third Eye_? ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2007, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-again-my-job-is-to-lift-mens-souls/403440/37 "2007-05-10T15:29:58Z")
[QUOTE=Aeschines] Can Bush handle being _both_ the Decider and the Uplifter?Of course he can! [/QUOTE] He seems more like an ‘Odor-Eater’. Now if only we could get him to stop snorting the foot-powder… ---
**Author:** ![AskNott](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asknott/32/5790_2.png) [@AskNott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AskNott)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2007, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-again-my-job-is-to-lift-mens-souls/403440/38 "2007-05-10T15:48:43Z")
[QUOTE=brownie55] A lottery with a $20 entry fee to do that job should pay off the National Debt. [/QUOTE] If every man, woman, and child bought 180 tickets, that would about do it. It has been a while since I looked up my share of the National Debt, and it is surely higher, now. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Liberal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/848f3c/32.png) [@Liberal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liberal)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2007, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-again-my-job-is-to-lift-mens-souls/403440/39 "2007-05-10T15:53:24Z")
The least he could do is lift our souls. He’s already crushed our spirits. ---
**Author:** ![ArrMatey](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/arrmatey/32/3522_2.png) [@ArrMatey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ArrMatey)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2007, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-again-my-job-is-to-lift-mens-souls/403440/40 "2007-05-10T16:03:46Z")
[QUOTE=jayjay] He wanted to say “I’m the Quicker Lifterupper” but the gnarled and rotted corpse of Nancy Walker said she’d haunt him until the Judgment Day if he dared besmirch her precious Bounty… And now I have an indelible image of Bush besmirching Nancy Walker’s “bounty” stuck in front of my mind’s eye. Brain bleach! [/QUOTE] Oh good lord. You’ve just inspired my next horror short-story. Thank you, a thousand times over! 🙂 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-again-my-job-is-to-lift-mens-souls/403440.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-again-my-job-is-to-lift-mens-souls/403440.md?page=3)