# Bush gets ass probe (weak & petty) **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [June 28, 2002, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-gets-ass-probe-weak-petty/116453 "2002-06-28T20:39:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![wring](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/838e76/32.png) [@wring](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wring)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2002, 11:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-gets-ass-probe-weak-petty/116453/21 "2002-06-28T23:40:21Z")
um , **scott** , you obviously don’t hang out in the same places this woman does, I hear us complaining **all the damn time** about pelvics. We may do it jokingly, but we certainly complain about 'em. (least ways, damn near every woman I converse w/ on a casual basis) ---
**Author:** ![wring](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/838e76/32.png) [@wring](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wring)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2002, 11:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-gets-ass-probe-weak-petty/116453/22 "2002-06-28T23:42:03Z")
damn you **Jodi**! (Beat me **and** made it funnier. dammit dammit dammit) ---
**Author:** ![Brutus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/91b2a8/32.png) [@Brutus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Brutus)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2002, 11:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-gets-ass-probe-weak-petty/116453/23 "2002-06-28T23:42:41Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by scott evil \* > \*\* > …Get over it. Your health is more important. I wonder how many of those 56,000 people that **Brutus** cited (without a cite) refused to have a rectal prostate exam or colonoscopy because of some feigned machismo. Stupid… > > - s.e. \*\* The [Colon Cancer Alliance](http://www.ccalliance.org/rescenter/crcdefined.html) that I cited in my original post would qualify as a valid source of info for CRC, I imagine… But kudos to the rest of your post. Once a year at the doc’s can save you time, money, and your life. But most people wait until after it’s too late. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2002, 12:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-gets-ass-probe-weak-petty/116453/24 "2002-06-29T00:07:51Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by scott evil \* > \*\* > > And yes, I’ve had a colonoscopy, when I had some nasty surgery on my ass two and a half years ago. Luckily I was completely under. And BTW, the reason I needed surgery there was **NOT SEX-RELATED** :rolleyes: > > - s.e. \*\* I hope the colonoscope wore a condom! 😛 I’M KIDDING! I was just JOKING! Um, why do you have that baseball bat…uh…no, please…dude NOOOOOOO!!! ---
**Author:** ![BoBettie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4af34b/32.png) [@BoBettie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BoBettie)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2002, 1:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-gets-ass-probe-weak-petty/116453/25 "2002-06-29T01:55:50Z")
Hey, what’s really fun for women is when… TMI ALERT! TMI ALERT! You have an oddly positioned uterus, so they digitally examine you vaginally and rectally at the same time. With not so much as dinner or some wine first! I never want to hear a man bitching about a rectal exam. Gimmie a break! Zette ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2002, 2:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-gets-ass-probe-weak-petty/116453/26 "2002-06-29T02:46:05Z")
I would LOVE to see the men of the SDMB try and deal with menstruation for a year. THEN we’d see who whines more! ---
**Author:** ![cercaria](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/87869e/32.png) [@cercaria](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cercaria)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2002, 3:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-gets-ass-probe-weak-petty/116453/27 "2002-06-29T03:00:40Z")
Colonoscopy! The President of the United States of America! Reality TV! Who’s thinking MTV has a new hit show in the making? 😛 ---
**Author:** ![widdershins](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f0a364/32.png) [@widdershins](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/widdershins)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2002, 3:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-gets-ass-probe-weak-petty/116453/28 "2002-06-29T03:28:06Z")
I think **anyone** who menstrates for an entire year would be entitled to whine all they want. Okay, okay, I know that’s not what you meant. Don’t hurt me, please. I was just kidding, can’t you take a joke. This poor thread has ventured into territory I really didn’t plan on… :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Skelji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b38774/32.png) [@Skelji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skelji)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2002, 3:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-gets-ass-probe-weak-petty/116453/29 "2002-06-29T03:46:14Z")
_The scene: Somewhere deep in the bowels of Walter Reed Hospital. The doctor is performing the procedure while speaking with The Unelected One._ Doc: “Mr. Resident, were you previously aware that you had polyps?” W: “Mmmmphhrmmrr grmppf flrblrrphh” Doc: “Nurse, please remove the colonscope so the patient can speak!” W: _cough_ "Thanks Docky Doc. Yes, a memo was shown to me for my oedipication at a previously occasioned time. I decided to, uh, let the, uh, evil polyps develop in order to asscertain whether or not any pockets of, uh, methane could be detected. As…as any oil man could tell you, the presence of methane often indicates that crude is underneath. Lord knows that deep down, I’m plenty crude. So, I needed polyps, methane, and a finger up my ass. Little did I know I’d get the trifecta!" Doc: :rolleyes: “I can only hope that this ass-reaming is just the start of many more to come.” ---
**Author:** ![Truth\_Seeker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/5fc32e/32.png) [@Truth\_Seeker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Truth_Seeker)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2002, 4:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-gets-ass-probe-weak-petty/116453/30 "2002-06-29T04:24:09Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by wring \* > \*\*I forgot, we’re not allowed to joke about our Leader. > > damn, I’ve got to get my address updated on that “humorless Americans” list. \*\* It’s just that some things aren’t particularly funny, they’re merely spiteful. Sometimes Bush bashing _is_ amusing. Sometimes Clinton bashing is (or was) amusing. Ditto with any other world leaders. Yes, lots of people viscerally dislike Bush. But, come on, the guy’s having a mildly unpleasant medical procedure. How can you criticize him for that? ---
**Author:** ![Mauvaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mauvaise/32/11084_2.png) [@Mauvaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mauvaise)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2002, 5:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-gets-ass-probe-weak-petty/116453/31 "2002-06-29T05:09:17Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Truth Seeker \* > But, come on, the guy’s having a mildly unpleasant medical procedure. How can you criticize him for that? We’re not criticizing him for having the procedure, it’s just that _that_ procedure is a natural set-up for jokes. We’re only human, you can’t expect us to refrain from such a “gimmie”. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![musicguy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ba0ec/32.png) [@musicguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/musicguy)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2002, 6:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-gets-ass-probe-weak-petty/116453/32 "2002-06-29T06:33:43Z")
I know this isn’t how it works but I would be soooo much more comfortable if they transferred that executive power to Powell. ---
**Author:** ![DoctorJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctorj/32/2904_2.png) [@DoctorJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DoctorJ)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2002, 6:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-gets-ass-probe-weak-petty/116453/33 "2002-06-29T06:48:28Z")
On the one hand, I’m glad the issue has been made public (due to the transfer of power), as it will raise colonoscopy/colon cancer screening in the public consciousness for a bit. When it comes to preventive care like this, every little bit counts. On the other hand, they’re apparently taking the scope and equipment out to Camp David to do it for him. How are we ever going to convince him that health care access is a problem in this country like that? Not only should he have to go somewhere and get it done like everyone else, he should also have to make all the phone calls and do all the neccessary paperwork himself. I bet Ari Fleischer would be out front within 24 hours talking about “the President’s increased commitment to improving access to health care for all Americans”. Dr. J Note: I’m aware that the President gets special medical care for very good reasons. It’s just a fantasy sort of thing. ---
**Author:** ![gobear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/8dc957/32.png) [@gobear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gobear)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2002, 11:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-gets-ass-probe-weak-petty/116453/34 "2002-06-29T11:36:36Z")
I don’t wonder that Bush requires a colonoscopy, since we all know he’s an asshole. (No, I am NOT a liberal, but I am also not blind. Anyone who imposed steel tariffs and signed that farm bill cannot be a true conservative.) ---
**Author:** ![London\_Calling](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/49beb7/32.png) [@London\_Calling](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/London_Calling)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2002, 11:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-gets-ass-probe-weak-petty/116453/35 "2002-06-29T11:52:07Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by musicguy \* > I know this isn’t how it works but I would be soooo much more comfortable if they transferred that executive power to Powell. Hasn’t he been _Isolationalised_ for the duration ? > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by gobear \* > I don’t wonder that Bush requires a colonoscopy, since we all know he’s an asshole. > > (No, I am NOT a liberal, but I am also not blind. Anyone who imposed steel tariffs and signed that farm bill cannot be a true conservative.) IMHO, he is definitely a conservative. It’s just that he’s more of a _opportunerist_. Bottoms up !! ---
**Author:** ![Milossarian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Milossarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Milossarian)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2002, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-gets-ass-probe-weak-petty/116453/36 "2002-06-29T15:46:01Z")
Gratuitous, liberal-backslapping, Bush-bash inserted here. ---
**Author:** ![Milossarian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Milossarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Milossarian)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2002, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-gets-ass-probe-weak-petty/116453/37 "2002-06-29T15:47:12Z")
I was always amused that Reagan had a growth removed from his colon, and Bush the Elder had one removed from his nose. Oh my God, I’m becoming one of you. ---
**Author:** ![Jenner](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ac8455/32.png) [@Jenner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jenner)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2002, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-gets-ass-probe-weak-petty/116453/38 "2002-06-29T16:16:52Z")
Oh, give me a break! :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![London\_Calling](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/49beb7/32.png) [@London\_Calling](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/London_Calling)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2002, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-gets-ass-probe-weak-petty/116453/39 "2002-06-29T17:44:54Z")
**Milo**. It’s a check up, a simple check up. He’s not ill, there’s no suggestion he’s ill, he doesn’t expect to be ill any time soon. In other words it’s a precautionary measure. Having said that, if something is found I’ll feel _extremely_ bad. BTW **Brutus** , that isn’t 56,000 projected deaths this year, it’s 56,000 projected deaths in the US alone this year. In fact, in the UK 21,000 men are diagnosed with prostate cancer each year now, and it’s about to overtake lung cancer as the biggest single killer of men – a British male has a 1 in 13 chance of developing prostate cancer in his lifetime. But Bush is just having an annual check up – if you total up all 35 or so check ups he may have in his life, there’s something like an 8% chance one of them will reveal something to worry about. If my maths are correct, for him that’s a 0.25%/a-one-in-four-hundred-chance per examination. Figures are very approximate, everything’s averaged out. ---
**Author:** ![scott\_evil](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/91b2a8/32.png) [@scott\_evil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scott_evil)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2002, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-gets-ass-probe-weak-petty/116453/40 "2002-06-29T18:07:16Z")
So he’s getting a colonoscopy. This begs the question: Do we _really, really_ need to know about it? Maybe it’s because he’ll be transferring his authority (I won’t say power, sorry) to Dick while a camera’s shoved up his ass. I guess the American people _need to know this_. A legitimate question: is there some law, or some provision in your Constitution, that requires a transfer of Presidential authority to be made public? And let’s hope we won’t see it on the news. I remember Reagan’s ass probe on the 6:00 news. “We can see the polyp now…” :eek: I don’t think we need to look up the President’s ass. We’ve already seen it, whenever he utters a word, or chokes on a pretzel. - s.e. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-gets-ass-probe-weak-petty/116453.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-gets-ass-probe-weak-petty/116453.md?page=3)