# Bush to search for own head this weekend. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [July 20, 2007, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-to-search-for-own-head-this-weekend/412556 "2007-07-20T16:54:43Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Biggirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biggirl/32/3294_2.png) [@Biggirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biggirl)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2007, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-to-search-for-own-head-this-weekend/412556/1 "2007-07-20T16:54:43Z")
[Dick Cheney to start Clone Wars Saturday afternoon.](http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2007/07/20/AR2007072001039.html?hpid=moreheadlines) This could have gone into MPSIMS but-- it’s about Bush and Cheney. It’s a bad joke about Bush and Cheney. Plus most anything I start about Bush and Cheney ends up in the Pit anyway. So if this isn’t nasty enough, I’ll understand if it gets moved. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2007, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-to-search-for-own-head-this-weekend/412556/2 "2007-07-20T17:10:28Z")
As much as I can’t stand Bush, I feel sort of bad for him about this. I hope he has a speedy recovery so that he can get back to fucking his country as soon as possible. ---
**Author:** ![Jolly\_Roger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/91b2a8/32.png) [@Jolly\_Roger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jolly_Roger)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2007, 5:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-to-search-for-own-head-this-weekend/412556/3 "2007-07-20T17:18:59Z")
[QUOTE=tdn] As much as I can’t stand Bush, I feel sort of bad for him about this. I hope he has a speedy recovery so that he can get back to fucking his country as soon as possible. [/QUOTE] Other than the empathy I would have for any living human being I really can’t find it in myself to worry about Bush. That concern is better spent on the soldiers he’s maimed and killed in this insane quagmire of Iraq. ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2007, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-to-search-for-own-head-this-weekend/412556/4 "2007-07-20T17:29:29Z")
Interestingly, the last time I had a colonoscopy, the doctor found Bush’s political agenda. ---
**Author:** ![BobLibDem](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/boblibdem/32/3149_2.png) [@BobLibDem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BobLibDem)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2007, 5:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-to-search-for-own-head-this-weekend/412556/5 "2007-07-20T17:34:02Z")
I don’t wish bad health on Bush. I want him to live a long life to see how history is going to judge him. For someone in as good a shape as he is (well, physically, anyway) it should be behind him quickly. What will Cheney do? Pardon Scooter? Put his feet up in the Oval Office? Issue an Executive Order exempting himself from all future Executive Orders? Send Wilson and Plame to Gitmo? So much to screw up, so little time… ---
**Author:** ![OneCentStamp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/13edae/32.png) [@OneCentStamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneCentStamp)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2007, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-to-search-for-own-head-this-weekend/412556/6 "2007-07-20T17:37:59Z")
[QUOTE=Cervaise] Interestingly, the last time I had a colonoscopy, the doctor found Bush’s political agenda. [/QUOTE] I have it on good authority that the scripts for Star Wars Episodes I-III emerged, fully formed, from just such a colonoscopy performed on George Lucas in the mid 90s. ---
**Author:** ![Ponder\_Stibbons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponder_stibbons/32/343_2.png) [@Ponder\_Stibbons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponder_Stibbons)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2007, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-to-search-for-own-head-this-weekend/412556/7 "2007-07-20T17:46:24Z")
I am offended – offended, I tell you! – at Biggirl’s characterization of this procedure. “Bush to search for own head this weekend” indeed! It’s the _doctor_ who will be searching for Bush’s head. Dubya isn’t nearly so nimble as to be able to do that procedure himself. Pah! 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Haunted](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/898d66/32.png) [@Haunted](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Haunted)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2007, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-to-search-for-own-head-this-weekend/412556/8 "2007-07-20T17:51:45Z")
Love that pic of Bush. Seriously LOVE it. _Thank you, Washington Post. I take back a bunch of the stuff I said about you._ So many jokes, so little time. Bush is so full of shit this colonoscopy could take all weekend. Maybe the docs can find the Constitution and the Bill of Rights while they’re rooting around in there. Maybe we’ll finally be able to locate the WMDs. ---
**Author:** ![MsRobyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/90ced4/32.png) [@MsRobyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsRobyn)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2007, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-to-search-for-own-head-this-weekend/412556/9 "2007-07-20T17:57:03Z")
[QUOTE=tdn] As much as I can’t stand Bush, I feel sort of bad for him about this. I hope he has a speedy recovery so that he can get back to fucking his country as soon as possible. [/QUOTE] Bush finally gets to experience how it feels for the rest of us! I hope the bowel prep he has to take is nasty, and that he has to spend the night on the can. He might want to stock up on fresh coloring books and crayons. Robin ---
**Author:** ![BJMoose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5fc32e/32.png) [@BJMoose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BJMoose)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2007, 6:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-to-search-for-own-head-this-weekend/412556/10 "2007-07-20T18:00:16Z")
[QUOTE=Cervaise] Interestingly, the last time I had a colonoscopy, the doctor found Bush’s political agenda. [/QUOTE] Neglected to take the purgative the evening before, eh? ---
**Author:** ![Voyager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voyager/32/133_2.png) [@Voyager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Voyager)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2007, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-to-search-for-own-head-this-weekend/412556/11 "2007-07-20T18:28:04Z")
What’s this temporarily handing power to Cheney stuff? He did that 6 years ago. And it’s not true that Tony Snow will collect what was expelled during the prep and try to tell the press that it’s chocolate pudding. Not true at all, I tell you. ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2007, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-to-search-for-own-head-this-weekend/412556/12 "2007-07-20T18:30:20Z")
I want it examined for traces of lubricants. ---
**Author:** ![Waverly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/57b2e6/32.png) [@Waverly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Waverly)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2007, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-to-search-for-own-head-this-weekend/412556/13 "2007-07-20T18:57:10Z")
I hope they mistake a firehose for the scope. ---
**Author:** ![Plynck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3e96dc/32.png) [@Plynck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Plynck)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2007, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-to-search-for-own-head-this-weekend/412556/14 "2007-07-20T19:21:43Z")
> [@](#): > > He last had such a colorectal cancer check on June 29, 2002 And later that year, an intelligence report showed that there were WMDs in Iraq. I always wondered where report originated. Okay, all the good ones were already taken… ---
**Author:** ![descamisado](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e480ec/32.png) [@descamisado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/descamisado)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2007, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-to-search-for-own-head-this-weekend/412556/15 "2007-07-20T19:37:13Z")
[QUOTE=elucidator] I want it examined for traces of lubricants. [/QUOTE] Finally, someone who’s thinking what I’m think, _if_ you’re what I’m thinking. ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Ashtar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ea924/32.png) [@Lord\_Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Ashtar)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2007, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-to-search-for-own-head-this-weekend/412556/16 "2007-07-20T19:38:34Z")
I’m glad to see you can copy off of [Fark.com](http://Fark.com), **Biggirl**. ---
**Author:** ![Biggirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biggirl/32/3294_2.png) [@Biggirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biggirl)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2007, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-to-search-for-own-head-this-weekend/412556/17 "2007-07-20T19:52:58Z")
[QUOTE=Lord Ashtar] I’m glad to see you can copy off of [Fark.com](http://Fark.com), **Biggirl**. [/QUOTE] I didn’t copy off of anybody. These jokes write themselves. But I understand why you wanted to get in a dig at me. I hope your President gets through his ass reaming intact. One day of President Cheney will be enough. ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Ashtar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ea924/32.png) [@Lord\_Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Ashtar)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2007, 7:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-to-search-for-own-head-this-weekend/412556/18 "2007-07-20T19:59:22Z")
First off, he’s only “my president” in the sense that he’s the president of the country in which I now live, since I did not vote for him. But if you have to paint me as a right-wing pubbie to be sick and tired of your useless, pointless, endless line of Bush-bashing Pit threads, then so be it. However, about 20 minutes before you posted this OP, this was over at Fark: > [@](#): > > Bush to have colonoscopy as doctors attempt to find his head; Cheney to take temporary control. Let me know when you get around to having an original thought, but please don’t hurt yourself in the process. ---
**Author:** ![wring](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/838e76/32.png) [@wring](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wring)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2007, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-to-search-for-own-head-this-weekend/412556/19 "2007-07-20T20:06:27Z")
[QUOTE=Lord Ashtar] First off, he’s only “my president” in the sense that he’s the president of the country in which I now live, since I did not vote for him. But if you have to paint me as a right-wing pubbie to be sick and tired of your useless, pointless, endless line of Bush-bashing Pit threads, then so be it. However, about 20 minutes before you posted this OP, this was over at Fark: Let me know when you get around to having an original thought, but please don’t hurt yourself in the process. [/QUOTE] well, sorry, but that’s just the most obvious joke. Just 'cause two places came up with the same obvious joke immediately after the newsflash about the event is not evidence that one copied the other. colonoscopy = automatic head up the ass joke, no matter who the patient is. ---
**Author:** ![Yllaria](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yllaria/32/3452_2.png) [@Yllaria](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yllaria)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2007, 8:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-to-search-for-own-head-this-weekend/412556/20 "2007-07-20T20:08:11Z")
[QUOTE=Biggirl] I didn’t copy off of anybody. These jokes write themselves. [/QUOTE] I totally believe that. The minute I saw the headline for the article, I knew it would be happening . . . and happening . . . and happening. Can we make a top ten list of things to be found? So far, we’ve got his head, his political agenda (sort of), the Constitution/Bill of Rights, lube, WMD’s (sort of), and I’ll add an exit strategy. Anyone want to add an item or put them in sequence? [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bush-to-search-for-own-head-this-weekend/412556.md?page=2)