# Bushco even lies about the weather? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 25, 2004, 1:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bushco-even-lies-about-the-weather/246907 "2004-05-25T01:04:36Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![El\_Kabong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/el_kabong/32/496_2.png) [@El\_Kabong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Kabong)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2004, 4:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bushco-even-lies-about-the-weather/246907/41 "2004-05-25T04:49:29Z")
Mr. Brown: O.K., let me tell you what Like a Virgin’s about. It’s all about this Reeder who’s a regular Bush bashing machine, I’m talking morning, day, night, afternoon, Bush, Bush, Bush, Bush, Bush, Bush, Bush, Bush, Bush. Mr. Blue: How many Bushes is that? Mr. White: A lot. Mr. Brown: Then one day he meets this John Kerry motherfucker and it’s like, whoa baby, I mean this cat is like Charles Bronson in the Great Escape, he’s digging tunnels. Now, he’s gettin’ the serious Kerry action and he’s feeling something he ain’t felt since forever. Pain. Pain. It hurts him. It shouldn’t hurt him, you know his ass should be Bubble Yum by now, but when this cat fucks him it hurts. It hurts just like it did the first time he got boned by Bush. You see the pain is reminding a Bush bashing machine what it once was like to be a virgin. Hence, “Like a virgin.” ---
**Author:** ![threemae](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/5f9b8f/32.png) [@threemae](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/threemae)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2004, 1:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bushco-even-lies-about-the-weather/246907/42 "2004-05-25T13:43:21Z")
> [@El\_Kabong](#): > > Mr. Brown: O.K., let me tell you what Like a Virgin’s about. It’s all about this Reeder who’s a regular Bush bashing machine, I’m talking morning, day, night, afternoon, Bush, Bush, Bush, Bush, Bush, Bush, Bush, Bush, Bush. > > Mr. Blue: How many Bushes is that? > > Mr. White: A lot. > > Mr. Brown: Then one day he meets this John Kerry motherfucker and it’s like, whoa baby, I mean this cat is like Charles Bronson in the Great Escape, he’s digging tunnels. Now, he’s gettin’ the serious Kerry action and he’s feeling something he ain’t felt since forever. Pain. Pain. It hurts him. It shouldn’t hurt him, you know his ass should be Bubble Yum by now, but when this cat fucks him it hurts. It hurts just like it did the first time he got boned by Bush. You see the pain is reminding a Bush bashing machine what it once was like to be a virgin. Hence, “Like a virgin.” If I could stop giggling, perhaps I could _begin_ to comprehend what the hell you just wrote. ---
**Author:** ![Bruce\_Daddy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/85f322/32.png) [@Bruce\_Daddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bruce_Daddy)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2004, 1:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bushco-even-lies-about-the-weather/246907/43 "2004-05-25T13:57:58Z")
> [@El\_Kabong](#): > > Mr. Brown: O.K., let me tell you what Like a Virgin’s about. It’s all about this Reeder who’s a regular Bush bashing machine, I’m talking morning, day, night, afternoon, Bush, Bush, Bush, Bush, Bush, Bush, Bush, Bush, Bush. > > Mr. Blue: How many Bushes is that? > > Mr. White: A lot. > > Mr. Brown: Then one day he meets this John Kerry motherfucker and it’s like, whoa baby, I mean this cat is like Charles Bronson in the Great Escape, he’s digging tunnels. Now, he’s gettin’ the serious Kerry action and he’s feeling something he ain’t felt since forever. Pain. Pain. It hurts him. It shouldn’t hurt him, you know his ass should be Bubble Yum by now, but when this cat fucks him it hurts. It hurts just like it did the first time he got boned by Bush. You see the pain is reminding a Bush bashing machine what it once was like to be a virgin. Hence, “Like a virgin.” :clapping: That was good. Hey **Reeder** , I’ve posted this for you before I think, but [here you go.](http://dir.yahoo.com/Recreation/Hobbies/) ---
**Author:** ![BJMoose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5fc32e/32.png) [@BJMoose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BJMoose)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2004, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bushco-even-lies-about-the-weather/246907/44 "2004-05-25T14:42:08Z")
Y’all’ve been so busy clawing at each other’s butts that no one has noticed the obvious Bush-bashing joke in this incident; viz., that Fearless Leader’s staff seems to be saying George can’t whistle and ride a bike at the same time. Anyway. As for the exact soil conditions, the proper thing to do here is the Straight Dope Scientific Method: go and look at it. So it’s only appropiate to ask gentle **Reeder** to go to Dubya’s ranch and see for himself. Doubtless many folks in this thread will volunteer to provide cover. . . . ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2004, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bushco-even-lies-about-the-weather/246907/45 "2004-05-25T15:33:37Z")
Hey **Reeder** , didja ever stop to think that maybe there are folks who are on the fence about the election? Outlandish thought, I know, but humor me, mmkay? So we’ve got Bob Lurkin-Doper and his daughter Ima Lurkin-Doper (Eura died in a tragic pinochle accident and they don’t talk about it much). They read the board together for an hour or so every night. Eack night of the week it is a different forum. So every so often they happen to be reading the Pit because hey, they like comedy (which this is) and they are thinking about maybe ponying up $15 – oops, sorry, **$14.95** – to post a rant about the tragic death of Eura Lurkin-Doper and why you should always be careful when playing pinochle. When they read the Pit, sometimes they come across truly worthy rants. Sometimes they come across pile-ons, and they don’t usually enjoy those too much. Sometimes they come acros partisan screeds of one flavor or another, and sometimes they get introduced to people who really should have thought twice and posted/spoke once. They’ve been reading this MB for a while now and they’ve gotten a pretty high dose of your threads … to the point where if Bob says “Hey Ima, here’s another **Reeder** thread”, Ima says “Bob, is it a thread about something **Reeder** thinks is Bush’s failure?” Ima is always right, only it has gotten to where they don’t laugh at **Reeder** ’s predictability, they quite frankly would like for him to get a life and post about something less pointless than the weather for the past week where GWB had been riding a bicycle. When it comes to things like the topsoil firmness and density in Crawford, TX (or Waco, or Weehauken, NJ), they frankly could not care a hell of a lot less. **Reeder** ’s pathetic predictability has gotten them really pretty fed up about petty bickering and nitpicking. So Bob and Ima are thinking that if they see six more pointless Bush-bashing threads (which, judging from the content of your average **Reeder** thread, should happen within the next six to ten new threads in any forum), they will vote for him just to piss off **Reeder** , because he has pissed them off. At this point, casual reader, you might be wondering to yourself “Now Bob, Ima, you know you could just … not read the threads.” Bob and Ima considered this, and in their considered opinions (they did consider this, after all), they like to give people as much a fair shake as they can. They don’t 100% plan for a new thread (sometimes Ima picks the threads and sometimes Bob does) by **Reeder** to be something about the Bush administration, but lately it has gotten to be difficult not to expect it. So they would like to think **Reeder** for all the time wasted on reading his threads (time they could better have spent mourning the loss of poor Eura from that horrific Pinochle accident) by maybe voting for Bush just to piss **Reeder** off. By the way, their family friends Yora Frienda-Bob and Sheiza Frienda-Bob are thinking that anyone who wastes this much of Bob and Ima’s deserves as good a turn as **Reeder** gave them, and they are voting for Bush pretty much regardless of how much it rained or didn’t rain in Crawford. ---
**Author:** ![catsix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e19b73/32.png) [@catsix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/catsix)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2004, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bushco-even-lies-about-the-weather/246907/46 "2004-05-25T15:42:11Z")
He’s like a boy with a serious crush on a girl but he can’t admit it because girls have ‘cooties’ so he spends all his time picking on her and trying to make her cry, since that’s the only way he can give her any attention. Makes me wonder. ---
**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2004, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bushco-even-lies-about-the-weather/246907/47 "2004-05-25T16:03:40Z")
> [@threemae](#): > > If I could stop giggling, perhaps I could _begin_ to comprehend what the hell you just wrote. You clearly need to watch [This movie](http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/B00008975Z/qid=1085500893/sr=8-1/ref=pd_ka_1/103-6311077-7882237?v=glance&s=dvd&n=507846) immediately! ---
**Author:** ![athelas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5e9695/32.png) [@athelas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/athelas)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2004, 7:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bushco-even-lies-about-the-weather/246907/48 "2004-05-25T19:14:12Z")
While we’re on the topic of amusing falls, let’s not forget John Kerry’s analogous incident: [http://www.drudgereport.com/kerryid2.htm](http://www.drudgereport.com/kerryid2.htm) ---
**Author:** ![Aguecheek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a9adbd/32.png) [@Aguecheek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aguecheek)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2004, 7:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bushco-even-lies-about-the-weather/246907/49 "2004-05-25T19:18:22Z")
> [@BJMoose](#): > > Fearless Leader’s staff seems to be saying George can’t whistle and ride a bike at the same time. That was beautiful. Beautiful! ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2004, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bushco-even-lies-about-the-weather/246907/50 "2004-05-25T20:18:31Z")
I vote we send **Reeder** down to Crawford to collect soil samples (he can wear his trench coat and aviator sunglasses, so Bushco won’t know what he’s up to). Then we can evaluate the Bushco claims under strict laboratory conditions. Just be careful, **Reeder** , it’s wartime. 😕 ---
**Author:** ![Squink](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b5e925/32.png) [@Squink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Squink)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2004, 8:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bushco-even-lies-about-the-weather/246907/51 "2004-05-25T20:42:58Z")
Couldn’t someone just e-mail Ted Nugent? ---
**Author:** ![duffer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/duffer/32/1026_2.png) [@duffer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/duffer)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2004, 9:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bushco-even-lies-about-the-weather/246907/52 "2004-05-25T21:30:58Z")
Yup, Bush is the only one to fall from a bike. [http://www.usatoday.com/news/politicselections/nation/president/2004-05-02-kerry-bike\_x.htm](http://www.usatoday.com/news/politicselections/nation/president/2004-05-02-kerry-bike_x.htm) Whee! Um, uhh, hold on boys. We have to make sure this doesn’t hit the press, otherwise people like **Reeder** will have to admit they were going for a cheap shot. Damn! Now we have to find another cheap shot to hit Bush with. ---
**Author:** ![duffer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/duffer/32/1026_2.png) [@duffer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/duffer)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2004, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bushco-even-lies-about-the-weather/246907/53 "2004-05-25T21:36:01Z")
> [@duffer](#): > > Yup, Bush is the only one to fall from a bike. > > [http://www.usatoday.com/news/politicselections/nation/president/2004-05-02-kerry-bike\_x.htm](http://www.usatoday.com/news/politicselections/nation/president/2004-05-02-kerry-bike_x.htm) > > Whee! Um, uhh, hold on boys. We have to make sure this doesn’t hit the press, otherwise people like **Reeder** will have to admit they were going for a cheap shot. > > Damn! Now we have to find another cheap shot to hit Bush with. Now keep in mind, Bush was into the 16th mile of an off-road 17 mile course. He wasn’t on a pussy 10-speed riding down the side of a paved highway and wiped out on the soft shoulder close to his mansion. John Kerry, tough guy. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![irae](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/f0a364/32.png) [@irae](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/irae)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2004, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bushco-even-lies-about-the-weather/246907/54 "2004-05-25T22:10:38Z")
And just as I was thinking to myself, ‘Self. What could possibly happen on page 2 of this thread to drag it down another level or three…?’ Thanks, **duffer** ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2004, 10:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bushco-even-lies-about-the-weather/246907/55 "2004-05-25T22:13:44Z")
> [@duffer](#): > > Now keep in mind, Bush was into the 16th mile of an off-road 17 mile course. He wasn’t on a pussy 10-speed riding down the side of a paved highway and wiped out on the soft shoulder close to his mansion. John Kerry, tough guy. :rolleyes: No problem. We just have **Reeder** make an additional stop to collect _sand_ samples, and ---
**Author:** ![duffer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/duffer/32/1026_2.png) [@duffer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/duffer)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2004, 10:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bushco-even-lies-about-the-weather/246907/56 "2004-05-25T22:23:10Z")
> [@irae](#): > > And just as I was thinking to myself, ‘Self. What could possibly happen on page 2 of this thread to drag it down another level or three…?’ Thanks, **duffer** Sorry I was the one to point out that shit happens. Use it as a learning experience. If this thread is only limited to Bush references when it comes to bike crashes, please, please let me know. ---
**Author:** ![photopat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e95f7d/32.png) [@photopat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/photopat)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2004, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bushco-even-lies-about-the-weather/246907/57 "2004-05-25T22:33:04Z")
Reeder, do you see the problem here? (Okay, _one_ of the problems) You hate Bush - fine. I don’t like him, and want him out of the white house, but you’ve made a decision that there _had_ to be a lie in this situation, when you simply _can’t_ know what the conditions were. You weren’t there. Let it go. **You’re not helping.** ---
**Author:** ![Mojo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/85f322/32.png) [@Mojo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mojo)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2004, 11:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bushco-even-lies-about-the-weather/246907/58 "2004-05-25T23:19:54Z")
Is anyone else picturing **duffer** as looking like **Reeder** but with a little goatee? Both of you- No. One. Cares. ---
**Author:** ![duffer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/duffer/32/1026_2.png) [@duffer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/duffer)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2004, 12:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bushco-even-lies-about-the-weather/246907/59 "2004-05-26T00:14:27Z")
> [@Mojo](#): > > Is anyone else picturing **duffer** as looking like **Reeder** but with a little goatee? > > Both of you- No. One. Cares. Holy shit. I actually have a goatee and 'stache. Are you a part of the Plan? Or should I rebuild my tinfoil hat? Damn, they really are out to get me. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2004, 12:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bushco-even-lies-about-the-weather/246907/60 "2004-05-26T00:24:26Z")
> [@duffer](#): > > Holy shit. I actually have a goatee and 'stache. Are you a part of the Plan? Or should I rebuild my tinfoil hat? > > Damn, they really are out to get me. ☹ How many times do we have to have those secret Illuminati Tinfoil Hat meetings? Align the polarity such that the reverse of the longitudinal maximum is opposite the left flap on your parietal lobe! HOW much more simple could this be? [sub]Seriously, dude? Anyone with a brain in their head think Reeder’s nuckin’ futs, or at best takes him with a shakerful of salt. Take him as seriously as your Weekly World News. You’re better than this petty shit.[/sub] [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bushco-even-lies-about-the-weather/246907.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bushco-even-lies-about-the-weather/246907.md?page=4)