# Business names that sound completely fake **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [October 28, 2007, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354 "2007-10-28T18:19:07Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Lust4Life](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ecc23a/32.png) [@Lust4Life](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lust4Life)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2007, 2:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354/81 "2007-10-30T14:11:09Z")
Schindlers Lifts,existed before the movie with a similar title. ---
**Author:** ![Ellen\_Cherry](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ellen_cherry/32/3600_2.png) [@Ellen\_Cherry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ellen_Cherry)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2007, 2:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354/82 "2007-10-30T14:39:02Z")
No discussion of business names whatsoever is complete without mentioning my hometown’s proud legitimate company, [Big Ass Fans](http://www.bigassfans.com/). I have yet to decide if I’m annoyed, amused or both. ---
**Author:** ![rhythmonly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ee59a6/32.png) [@rhythmonly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rhythmonly)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2007, 3:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354/83 "2007-10-30T15:38:39Z")
There were a couple of businesses that had unique names a few years back. The first one was a muffler shop, called Muff’n’Stuff. Their sign outside proudly acclaimed “No Muff Too Tuff”. The second was a combination liquor store and poker parlor. It was called Satan’s Spirits. They had t-shirts made that had their name on the front. The back read “Liquor in the Front. Poker in the Rear”. ---
**Author:** ![vetbridge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b5e925/32.png) [@vetbridge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vetbridge)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2007, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354/84 "2007-10-30T15:42:05Z")
[QUOTE=Cervaise] There is a company here in Seattle that apparently does some sort of electronics manufacturing, named “T & A.” I’m not entirely certain what they do, and I’m not about to find out, because good luck googling "T & A."Why is the turkey humping the G? [/QUOTE] You never heard of the G spot? 😛 ---
**Author:** ![ShadowFacts](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/shadowfacts/32/2934_2.png) [@ShadowFacts](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShadowFacts)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2007, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354/85 "2007-10-30T15:58:02Z")
[QUOTE=Sapo] Squat & Gobble is ok. Gobble and Squat would be worse. [/QUOTE] Priceless! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2007, 4:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354/86 "2007-10-30T16:27:50Z")
[QUOTE=fiddlesticks] [Fifth Third Bank](http://www.53.com/) sounds like a joke name to me. I’m half disappointed the FAQ on their homepage doesn’t explain their name. 😃 [/QUOTE] **Adam’s Mark** hotels. I still can’t figure out who Adam and/or Mark are supposed to be. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2007, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354/87 "2007-10-30T17:00:11Z")
[QUOTE=John DiFool] **Adam’s Mark** hotels. I still can’t figure out who Adam and/or Mark are supposed to be. [/QUOTE] That reminds me. Ruth’s Chris Steakhouses. There are several of these in the Toronto area, I’ve heard that they are expensive but good, but I just cant get past the name. “Ruth’s Chris”?? What does that evwen _mean_? At least “Adam’s Mark” brings up an image of Adam stamping his mark of approval onto something. ---
**Author:** ![cher3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/da6949/32.png) [@cher3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cher3)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2007, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354/88 "2007-10-30T17:06:46Z")
[QUOTE=ZipperJJ] I’ve always thought “Costco” and “Petco” were weird names (and now “ShopKo” too). Until we got one in our neighborhood, I always assumed Petco was the boring, bland, warehouse version of Petsmart, because Petsmart put a lot of thought into their name and Petco did not. Turns out they’re basically the same store. [/QUOTE] My favorite around here is “Squidco”. It’s a bait shop. ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2007, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354/89 "2007-10-30T17:08:19Z")
[QUOTE=Sunspace] That reminds me. Ruth’s Chris Steakhouses. There are several of these in the Toronto area, I’ve heard that they are expensive but good, but I just cant get past the name. “Ruth’s Chris”?? What does that evwen _mean_? At least “Adam’s Mark” brings up an image of Adam stamping his mark of approval onto something. [/QUOTE] It means a chick named Ruth bought a successful local restaurant which had been named “Chris Steakhouse” for a long time and didn’t want to change the name too much. So she added her own name to the front. It’s somewhere on her website. Now, tell me why Chris didn’t name his steakhouse “Chris’ Steakhouse”? Trying to save on neon? ---
**Author:** ![lisacurl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/41988e/32.png) [@lisacurl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lisacurl)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2007, 5:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354/90 "2007-10-30T17:09:00Z")
[The Master speaks on Fifth Third Bank.](http://www.straightdope.com/columns/020118.html) ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2007, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354/91 "2007-10-30T18:08:36Z")
[QUOTE=Sunspace] At least “Adam’s Mark” brings up an image of Adam stamping his mark of approval onto something. [/QUOTE] I’ve stayed at an Adam’s Mark. If Adam’s mark of approval looks like the way a first-grader might try to paint a star, then that’s his mark of approval. The name was odd and so was the logo. And as things turned out, so were their accounting methods. But that’s a discussion that’s not really for this thread. ---
**Author:** ![Scuba\_Ben](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/278dde/32.png) [@Scuba\_Ben](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scuba_Ben)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2007, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354/92 "2007-10-30T18:10:56Z")
[QUOTE=John DiFool] **Adam’s Mark** hotels. I still can’t figure out who Adam and/or Mark are supposed to be. [/QUOTE] I once knew someone who worked at one of the Adam’s Mark hotels. I think Adam was the founder; the mark was (as I vaguely remember) an interesting cloud formation that he saw which inspired the logo. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2007, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354/93 "2007-10-30T18:16:31Z")
[QUOTE=WhyNot] It means a chick named Ruth bought a successful local restaurant which had been named “Chris Steakhouse” for a long time and didn’t want to change the name too much. So she added her own name to the front. It’s somewhere on her website. [/quote] Okay, that makes sense. > [@WhyNot](#): > > Now, tell me why Chris didn’t name his steakhouse “Chris’ Steakhouse”? Trying to save on neon? Apostrophobia? 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Elret](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b9bd4f/32.png) [@Elret](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elret)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2007, 7:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354/94 "2007-10-30T19:08:03Z")
[QUOTE=Rick] Makers of high end electrical /electronic test equipment. **Fluke.** I always thought they should use the following as an ad line: If you get the right reading it’s a Fluke. :eek: [/QUOTE] [If it’s on time, it’s a Fluke](http://www.fluke.ca/). ---
**Author:** ![DustyButt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9fc348/32.png) [@DustyButt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DustyButt)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2007, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354/95 "2007-10-30T19:20:22Z")
In DC there’s a kitchen remodeling company called… **Counterintelligence** They have trucks that trundle around town with their name plastered across the side. It’s always good for a smile. ---
**Author:** ![GuanoLad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guanolad/32/42_2.png) [@GuanoLad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GuanoLad)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2007, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354/96 "2007-10-30T21:43:11Z")
[QUOTE=WhyNot] Now, tell me why Chris didn’t name his steakhouse “Chris’ Steakhouse”? Trying to save on neon? [/QUOTE] Two reasons. One, that’s incorrect grammar. It ought to be “Chris’s Steakhouse” because his name is not a plural. The other reason may be because his name could actually have been “Chris Steakhouse” and he went into a predestined line of business. ---
**Author:** ![Reno\_Nevada](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/6f9a4e/32.png) [@Reno\_Nevada](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Reno_Nevada)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2007, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354/97 "2007-10-30T22:05:12Z")
[QUOTE=Joey P] There’s one in downtown Milwaukee that I’m absolutly convinced is hiding something, but all it says is “International Imports.” [/QUOTE] I assume that you do not know what that business is…you have \*got \* to go into that building. Report back. And, since I did mean to add something apropos–“El Paso Gas.” ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2007, 1:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354/98 "2007-10-31T01:08:45Z")
[QUOTE=GuanoLad] Two reasons. One, that’s incorrect grammar. It ought to be “Chris’s Steakhouse” because his name is not a plural. [/QUOTE] If a word ends in an “s”, plural or not, proper grammar for the possesive is an apostrophe after the “s”. Newer writing rules also allow for the “-s’s” construction, but it’s new fangled hedonism and was never allowed during the stone age when I was taught writing (the '80s). It’s in _Eats, Shoots & Leaves_, but I don’t have my copy with me to check the page number. [Cite 2:](http://www.udel.edu/eli/questions/g21.html) > [@](#): > > Singular possessive > The possessive form of a singular noun is an apostrophe followed by the letter “s.” > > Kramer’s hair > Daphne’s patience > the car’s engine > > Words ending with s, z or x generally omit the “s.” > > Dr. Seuss’ sense of humor [Cite 3,](http://www.englishrules.com/writing/2005/possessive-form-of-singular-nouns-ending-with-s.php) although IME their “exceptions” are what I was taught as rule: > [@](#): > > While grammar books and style guides don’t necessarily agree on how to determine these exceptions, most consider a word’s pronunciation. Here is what a few of the books say: > > ``` > * If pronunciation would be awkward with the added -'s, some writers use only the apostrophe. Either use is acceptable. (Diana Hacker, A Writer's Reference) > * Exceptions are the possessives of ancient proper names in -es and -is [such as Achilles' and Isis'], the possessive Jesus', and such forms as for conscience' sake, for righteousness' sake. (Strunk and White, The Elements of Style) > * With some singular nouns that end in -s, pronouncing the possessive ending as a separate syllable can sound awkward; in such cases, it is acceptable to use just an apostrophe. (Kirszner & Mandell, The Brief Holt Handbook) > * Since writers vary in the use of the apostrophe, it is not possible to make a hard and fast rule about the apostrophe in singular words ending in s.… Punctuate according to pronunciation. (John E. Warriner, English Grammar and Composition) > > ``` My maiden name ended in an “s”, so I was frequently reminded of this rule growing up. ---
**Author:** ![StuffLikeThatThere](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc8723/32.png) [@StuffLikeThatThere](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StuffLikeThatThere)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2007, 1:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354/99 "2007-10-31T01:41:53Z")
McJunken Appalachian Real business, and no, I don’t know what they sell. ---
**Author:** ![Merkwurdigliebe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/74df32/32.png) [@Merkwurdigliebe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Merkwurdigliebe)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2007, 2:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354/101 "2007-10-31T02:21:08Z")
[QUOTE=An Arky] Here’s a list of supposed Front Companies for the CIA. It reads like a Who’s Who of Business Names That Sound Completely Fake… [CIA Front Companies](http://www.jar2.com/2/Intel/CIA/CIA%20Fronts.htm) [/QUOTE] Just a few funny ones I’ve noticed… Audio Intelligence Devices, Inc Coastal Products Crest Detective Agency Cryogenics, Inc Energy Resources Functional Devices, Inc Fund For Peace Global Financial Impossible Electronic Techniques Intercontinental Industries Vector, Ltd Venture Fund [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354.md?page=6)