# Business names that sound completely fake **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [October 28, 2007, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354 "2007-10-28T18:19:07Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![furryman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/furryman/32/99_2.png) [@furryman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/furryman)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2007, 2:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354/102 "2007-10-31T02:30:44Z")
Sticks 'n Stuff: To me this sounds like a store that should be located next to Spatula City. Balls Soda: When I first saw this in Fallout I thought they had made it up. I also like places that have a sense of humor: For example there a local potato chip called Bull’s Chips and the farm the potatoes are grown on is called Bull’s Hit. When I lived in Maryland I saw a Ewing Oil company truck every once in awhile. I always wondered wether the guy who owned the company was a big Dallas fan or if his name was really Ewing. ---
**Author:** ![Mister\_Rik](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mister_rik/32/491_2.png) [@Mister\_Rik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mister_Rik)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2007, 2:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354/103 "2007-10-31T02:57:31Z")
[QUOTE=guizot] “Applied Technologies” “Integrated Solutions” “Cubic” “Consolidated Industries” [/QUOTE] There is a store in my town with the imaginative, highly descriptive name: “ **Product Supply, Inc.** ” So they sell … what? “Product”? They actually sell stuff like bricks, cinder blocks, paving stones, and other similar things made of concrete. Maybe it’s construction business lingo. I can just hear the conversation: Bricklayer: “Hey boss, we’re just about out of product. Better order some more.” Foreman: (jots down note) “Buy more product.” ---
**Author:** ![Joey\_P](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/919ad9/32.png) [@Joey\_P](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Joey_P)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2007, 4:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354/104 "2007-10-31T04:08:15Z")
[QUOTE=Reno Nevada] I assume that you do not know what that business is…you have \*got \* to go into that building. Report back. [/QUOTE] I tried once, they accused my of being a spy and made me do humiliating things. ---
**Author:** ![tonedef](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f05b48/32.png) [@tonedef](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tonedef)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2007, 4:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354/105 "2007-10-31T04:16:33Z")
**Holy Sheet** - Is a place that sells sheets, blankets .ect \*\* THE DICK Liquor \*\* - A drive through bottle shop next to a pub/bar call The Dick ---
**Author:** ![Colophon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f05b48/32.png) [@Colophon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colophon)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2007, 11:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354/106 "2007-10-31T11:47:54Z")
[QUOTE=guizot] I think the OP is about names that seem like they can’t be real, or can’t really mean anything–not names that are just silly or annoying. Puns are common, especially with coffee houses. But there’s a difference between that, and names which are virtually meaningless. Like: “Applied Technologies” “Integrated Solutions” “Cubic” “Consolidated Industries” Yes, they’re real companies, but they sound like they’re money-laundering fronts. [/QUOTE] Remind me, what was the business “front” name in the James Bond movies? It was something equally bland, but my Google skillz have deserted me… Edit… aha! it was _Universal Exports_. ---
**Author:** ![Ellen\_Cherry](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ellen_cherry/32/3600_2.png) [@Ellen\_Cherry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ellen_Cherry)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2007, 12:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354/107 "2007-10-31T12:47:09Z")
[QUOTE=Phase42] There is a store in my town with the imaginative, highly descriptive name: “ **Product Supply, Inc.** ” So they sell … what? “Product”? They actually sell stuff like bricks, cinder blocks, paving stones, and other similar things made of concrete. Maybe it’s construction business lingo. I can just hear the conversation: Bricklayer: “Hey boss, we’re just about out of product. Better order some more.” Foreman: (jots down note) “Buy more product.” [/QUOTE] Along those lines, a good friend’s husband owned a contractors’ supply business called Area Supply. I think his father named it. I would never have dreamed of saying anything, I but always thought it was a wildly unimaginative and nondescript name. Area Supply. Motto: We supply the area… with supplies. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2007, 2:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354/108 "2007-10-31T14:01:42Z")
[QUOTE=Ellen Cherry] Along those lines, a good friend’s husband owned a contractors’ supply business called Area Supply. [/QUOTE] I have seen an AREA STORAGE. I think they must have saved a bundle on signage by bisecting and reversing ready-made signs. I’m reminded of the fakest-sounding business name in existence every time my BIOS loads: AMERICAN MEGATRENDS, INCORPORATED. It doesn’t even make sense, in context. ---
**Author:** ![Sunrazor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sunrazor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunrazor)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2007, 2:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354/109 "2007-10-31T14:39:25Z")
[QUOTE=Millit the Frail] Akin to Pottery Barn, I think Dress Barn sounds fake. Dress? Barn? Just sounds weird. [/QUOTE] The first time my wife wanted to shop in a Dress Barn, my first thought was, “But honey, you \*\*lost \*\* all that weight!” It just sounds like a linoleum-floored mega-store for plus-sized women. ---
**Author:** ![elmwood](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmwood/32/3060_2.png) [@elmwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elmwood)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2007, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354/110 "2007-10-31T16:34:00Z")
[QUOTE=Sunrazor] The first time my wife wanted to shop in a Dress Barn, my first thought was, “But honey, you \*\*lost \*\* all that weight!” It just sounds like a linoleum-floored mega-store for plus-sized women. [/QUOTE] No, the big women shop at Dress Barn WOMAN. To me, that, along with Casual Corner Woman, implies that the dresses sold at the plain old Dress Barn and Casual Corner are for men. ---
**Author:** ![Batsinma\_Belfry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ea5d25/32.png) [@Batsinma\_Belfry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Batsinma_Belfry)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2007, 6:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354/111 "2007-10-31T18:25:24Z")
An ex friend of mine had a business involving “government contracts.” He was very vague about the details, but it seemed to be very lucrative. He did a lot of his work online, and his business was called **_" His Full Name"_ Business**. And his website was \*\*\* www.“His Full Name” [Biz.com](http://Biz.com)\*\*\* :dubious: It cracked me up everytime I saw it. ---
**Author:** ![NinjaChick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/71c47a/32.png) [@NinjaChick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NinjaChick)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2007, 6:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354/112 "2007-10-31T18:54:30Z")
A friend’s parents would buy their pool supplies from the Water Warehouse. I remember giggling like a fool the first time I saw a catalog in their house, because the name makes me imagine a warehouse-type store selling…water. Also, Acme brick. Located on the web at [brick.com](http://brick.com). ---
**Author:** ![OneCentStamp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/13edae/32.png) [@OneCentStamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneCentStamp)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2007, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354/113 "2007-10-31T19:00:01Z")
[QUOTE=Millit the Frail] Akin to Pottery Barn, I think Dress Barn sounds fake. Dress? Barn? Just sounds weird. [/QUOTE] I always find myself thinking it’s a plus size store. Maybe just because…well…barns are big. _ETA: Apparently I’m not the only one who thinks this. You’d think they would realize that and change that damn name._ ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2007, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354/114 "2007-10-31T20:40:47Z")
There’s a telecommunications company in Canada called Telus. No relation, apparently, to Tellus, the telecommunications branch of the evil megalocorporation in _Werewolf: The Apocalypse_ that’s trying to bring about the end of the world. ---
**Author:** ![gonzoron](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a6a055/32.png) [@gonzoron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gonzoron)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2007, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354/115 "2007-10-31T21:06:29Z")
Near my old home, there was a big sign for: **Analtech** This one’s not so much fake sounding, as it is baffling. As in, “why would you continue to keep this name since you can’t possibly be ignorant of the connotations it’s picked up since the company’s most likely innocent founding.” I don’t know what they do precisely. I assume some sort of analysis. But their sign has a logo that I assume is supposed to be a flame or a beaker, but given the name, I can only see either a hand with index finger extended, or perhaps a drop of lube. (Ah… they have a website, so you can see the logo. Judge for yourself: [http://www.analtech.com/](http://www.analtech.com/)) ---
**Author:** ![brendon\_small](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/brendon_small/32/17101_2.png) [@brendon\_small](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brendon_small)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2007, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354/116 "2007-10-31T21:20:50Z")
[QUOTE=Telemark] [Deathwish Piano Movers](http://www.deathwishpiano.com/) [Starving Artists Movers](http://www.starvingartistsmovers.com/) - actually, there are several of these around the country [/QUOTE] There is also “Starving Student Movers” Brendon ---
**Author:** ![NailBunny](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ecae2f/32.png) [@NailBunny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NailBunny)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2007, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354/117 "2007-10-31T21:29:54Z")
Well, there was [this place](http://images1.snapfish.com/232323232%7Ffp335%3Enu%3D3238%3E382%3E695%3EWSNRCG%3D32334%3A6438%3A5%3Anu0mrj) we photographed in Tonopah on our way to Vegas. I mean, really. ---
**Author:** ![MrSquishy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b9e5f3/32.png) [@MrSquishy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrSquishy)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2007, 9:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354/118 "2007-10-31T21:39:05Z")
There’s a place here in town that I drive by all the time called Yotta Yotta Inc. Yes, I understand what the name means and why it might be named that. I still think it’s a stupid sounding name and if I worked there I’d be embarrassed to tell people the name of the place. I’d probably feel like I had to explain it every time. ---
**Author:** ![Rick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9f8e36/32.png) [@Rick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2007, 10:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354/119 "2007-10-31T22:30:42Z")
[QUOTE=gonzoron] Near my old home, there was a big sign for: **Analtech** This one’s not so much fake sounding, as it is baffling. As in, “why would you continue to keep this name since you can’t possibly be ignorant of the connotations it’s picked up since the company’s most likely innocent founding.” [/QUOTE] Back in the early 1970’s Snap-On tools sold an oscilloscope for automotive tune up. They called it an **Anal-O-scope**. The first part being pronounced ah-nall. Like in analysis. They got their salesmen to get patches sown on their uniform shirts that showed a scope waveform and had the name stitched on in large bold letters. One of my co-workers saw the patch and asked the salesman _What’s an anal scope?_ A Greek tune up was the reply. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![runninblue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bbce88/32.png) [@runninblue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/runninblue)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2007, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354/120 "2007-11-05T19:57:42Z")
[Badcock](http://www.badcock.com/) They sell furniture, and more… ---
**Author:** ![OneCentStamp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/13edae/32.png) [@OneCentStamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneCentStamp)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2007, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354/121 "2007-11-05T22:43:35Z")
[QUOTE=NailBunny] Well, there was [this place](http://images1.snapfish.com/232323232%7Ffp335%3Enu%3D3238%3E382%3E695%3EWSNRCG%3D32334%3A6438%3A5%3Anu0mrj) we photographed in Tonopah on our way to Vegas. I mean, really. [/QUOTE] I totally expected you to have gone to [this place](http://www.kumandgo.com). They’re all over the Midwest and I laughed for about 150 miles the first time I saw one. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-sound-completely-fake/424354.md?page=7)