# Business names that thoroughly irritate you for no valid reason **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 1, 2016, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-thoroughly-irritate-you-for-no-valid-reason/764673 "2016-09-01T17:41:30Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![Ulf\_the\_Unwashed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/b4bc9f/32.png) [@Ulf\_the\_Unwashed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ulf_the_Unwashed)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2016, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-thoroughly-irritate-you-for-no-valid-reason/764673/101 "2016-09-03T21:38:41Z")
> [@Amateur\_Barbarian](#): > > Not One and Two Thirds Bank? \Oh, goodness, no. That would be the correct interpretation for an institution known as Five Thirds Bank. This, in contrast, is _Fifth Third_, with the “of,” for multiplication, implied. 1/5 x 1/3 = 1/15; a fifth of a third is a fifteenth.\ Upon further reflection, I suppose it could be an ordinal of sorts: line up all the thirds and take the fifth one, as in 1/3 1/3 1/3 1/3 _ **1/3** _ 1/3 1/3 1/3… In which case it would be the One and Two Thirdsth Bank. Hard to say and spell. Or, it could be musical, which is interesting as the simultaneous playing of an interval of a third and an interval of a fifth would result in a major triad, assuming we started on the same tone for each…if the fifth is based on the upper note of the third we get something a wee bit dissonant… ---
**Author:** ![mixdenny](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mixdenny/32/2962_2.png) [@mixdenny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mixdenny)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2016, 10:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-thoroughly-irritate-you-for-no-valid-reason/764673/102 "2016-09-03T22:07:04Z")
> [@delphica](#): > > Ah, there is a light industry park near my house that houses a company called Flexovit. That’s all it says on the signs. Not even a tag line, such as Flexovit: Dental Solutions or anything that might give you a clue. > > After driving by it and being annoyed a million times, I googled it and learned they make industrial abrasives. I guess, well, it’s not like you’re going to stop somewhere and impulse purchase some industrial grade abrasives because you saw the sign, so the name/sign isn’t intended to advertise in any way. However it still sounds to me like some monolithic corporation in a futuristic dystopian novel, maybe everyone is employed by Flexovit but even the workers don’t know what Flexovit produces. If you are in the biz, you know. There are thousands of quickly built buildings around, Taco Bells come to mind, that are framed, covered with insulating sheet that can have beveled edges to look like thick panels. Then they are stuccoed with Dryvit. It is a thick cement based, granular product, already colored, that is troweled on and you’re done. The “vit” stands for vitreous in both names. Dennis ---
**Author:** ![mixdenny](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mixdenny/32/2962_2.png) [@mixdenny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mixdenny)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2016, 10:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-thoroughly-irritate-you-for-no-valid-reason/764673/103 "2016-09-03T22:09:46Z")
> [@DoggyDunnit](#): > > There’s a “car audio” shop on the east outskirts of town called “That Soundz Guud”. > > The combination of their product being the stereo systems the lowest common denominator loves and the name itself (including the spelling) has, does, and will always remind me of the demise of black culture. Ah yes, the ghetto blaster sound. The one in Cleveland I used to see was “Crank It Audio” and their slogan was, “If you can’t crank it, yank it!” Dennis ---
**Author:** ![mixdenny](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mixdenny/32/2962_2.png) [@mixdenny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mixdenny)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2016, 10:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-thoroughly-irritate-you-for-no-valid-reason/764673/104 "2016-09-03T22:13:34Z")
Not really a bad name, but an extremely specific name, “Fuse World”. I’ve been in there and the only thing they sell besides fuses was fuse pullers. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2016, 10:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-thoroughly-irritate-you-for-no-valid-reason/764673/105 "2016-09-03T22:19:54Z")
> [@Ulf\_the\_Unwashed](#): > > … > Upon further reflection, I suppose it could be an ordinal of sorts: line up all the thirds and take the fifth one, as in > > 1/3 1/3 1/3 1/3 _ **1/3** _ 1/3 1/3 1/3… > > In which case it would be the One and Two Thirdsth Bank. Hard to say and spell. > … This was close to my take. Assuming 1-origin addressing the fifth third is the closed interval [1.333… , 1.666…] or [1 [sup]1[/sup]/[sub]3[/sub], 1 [sup]2[/sup]/[sub]3[/sub]]. Assuming 0-origin addressing the fifth third is the closed interval [1.666… , 2.000…] or [1 [sup]2[/sup]/[sub]3[/sub], 2]. It’d be prettier if we had real text formatting to draw our fractions. I did the best I could with the tools available. It’s good mathematics but it’s \*really \*hard to fit into a jingle. Imagine “We’re your local friendly closed interval from one and one third to one and two thirds bank” sung by those perky female voices that do all the cheap TV jingles. It might be sung, but it just doesn’t sing. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![eschereal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eschereal/32/18939_2.png) [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2016, 10:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-thoroughly-irritate-you-for-no-valid-reason/764673/106 "2016-09-03T22:21:08Z")
Target? _Shoot it!_ > [@RivkahChaya](#): > > There’s a preschool around here called La Petite Academy. It drives me nuts that they couldn’t commit and spell it “Académie.” What about “Academi”? That is the current name of the company that was briefly known as “Xe” after the name “Blackwater” became to infamous. What the hell kind of name is “Academi” for a bunch of mercenaries? > [@Amateur\_Barbarian](#): > > I’ve always felt the same way about modern-speak rail crossing signs that read STOP RR XING. We all referred to those Italian road signs – you know, the ones that said “No U Turn”. Not sure why Italian, I guess the rhythm sounded right. Some kind of Pidgin, really. But what all you folks are missing out on are the weed shops. Every one of those things has a cutesy name. ---
**Author:** ![DonLogan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/51bf81/32.png) [@DonLogan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DonLogan)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2016, 10:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-thoroughly-irritate-you-for-no-valid-reason/764673/107 "2016-09-03T22:29:44Z")
Let It Bead. At no extra charge, I’ll throw in a stomach drug name, Aciphex. Say it and pretend it’s two words. That got by some VP somehow. ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2016, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-thoroughly-irritate-you-for-no-valid-reason/764673/108 "2016-09-03T22:33:59Z")
> [@DonLogan](#): > > At no extra charge, I’ll throw in a stomach drug name, Aciphex. Say it and pretend it’s two words. That got by some VP somehow. The launch of Cialis was delayed by several months, not due to safety or efficacy issues, but because some people with the surname Cialis sued the drug company and requested that the name be changed. :eek: I have a feeling that Fifth Third Bank, a company that is a ubiquitous presence in northern Illinois, will keep their name, unlike other banks and credit unions that have changed their name to various nonsense words. :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![Rick\_Kitchen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rick_kitchen/32/522_2.png) [@Rick\_Kitchen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick_Kitchen)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2016, 10:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-thoroughly-irritate-you-for-no-valid-reason/764673/109 "2016-09-03T22:34:21Z")
> [@mixdenny](#): > > Not really a bad name, but an extremely specific name, “Fuse World”. I’ve been in there and the only thing they sell besides fuses was fuse pullers. There’s a store in town here called Bulbs n Batteries. And that’s all they sell. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2016, 10:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-thoroughly-irritate-you-for-no-valid-reason/764673/110 "2016-09-03T22:36:56Z")
> [@eschereal](#): > > … What about “Academi”? That is the current name of the company that was briefly known as “Xe” after the name “Blackwater” became to infamous. What the hell kind of name is “Academi” for a bunch of mercenaries? > … Excellent camouflage. They hope … > [@eschereal](#): > > … > We all referred to those Italian road signs – you know, the ones that said “No U Turn”. Not sure why Italian, I guess the rhythm sounded right. Some kind of Pidgin, really. > … My favorites are every time you come up on a hill crest or blind curve on a rural road there are signs that say “Do Not Pass”. My comment: “Colonel DoNot sure explored a lot of this country back in the old days. Then he went and named every damn canyon, ditch, and road cut after himself. Sheesh what an egomaniac!” 😃 ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2016, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-thoroughly-irritate-you-for-no-valid-reason/764673/111 "2016-09-03T22:40:46Z")
> [@eschereal](#): > > What about “Academi”? That is the current name of the company that was briefly known as “Xe” after the name “Blackwater” became to infamous. What the hell kind of name is “Academi” for a bunch of mercenaries? The same kind of name as “Xe” or “Blackwater”. ---
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2016, 10:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-thoroughly-irritate-you-for-no-valid-reason/764673/112 "2016-09-03T22:50:43Z")
> [@Ulf\_the\_Unwashed](#): > > OP back again. I would imagine, as someone said, that “Thrift On By” is a play on “Drift On By,” only > > a) I am not familiar with “drift on by” as a common expression, certainly not common enough to make the connection obvious; and > > b) it seems like about the worst connection you could make if you want to keep a business running, since presumably you would like to have your customers stop rather than drifting (or thrifting) on by at 40 mph. There’s a song called “ **Don’t You** Drift on by.” Maybe people often refer to the song as simply “Drift on by,” and the owners didn’t know what the full title was. Also, maybe they thought the song was so popular, people would automatically fill in the whole name in their minds. FAIL. ---
**Author:** ![Riemann](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/riemann/32/3133_2.png) [@Riemann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Riemann)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2016, 10:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-thoroughly-irritate-you-for-no-valid-reason/764673/113 "2016-09-03T22:51:32Z")
> [@Ponch8](#): > > In the biotech industry, almost every major company has Gen (as in genetics) in its name. There are Biogen, Amgen, Genentech, Genzyme, and several others I can’t recall right now. It’s impossible to keep any of them straight. Don’t forget InGen! ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2016, 10:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-thoroughly-irritate-you-for-no-valid-reason/764673/114 "2016-09-03T22:57:44Z")
There’s a fruit juice place in San Francisco that calls itself “Street Juice.” I hear they’re good, I just can’t get through the door while maintaining an appetite for their product. ---
**Author:** ![Rick\_Kitchen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rick_kitchen/32/522_2.png) [@Rick\_Kitchen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick_Kitchen)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2016, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-thoroughly-irritate-you-for-no-valid-reason/764673/115 "2016-09-03T23:05:54Z")
> [@LSLGuy](#): > > Excellent camouflage. They hope … > > My favorites are every time you come up on a hill crest or blind curve on a rural road there are signs that say “Do Not Pass”. > > My comment: “Colonel DoNot sure explored a lot of this country back in the old days. Then he went and named every damn canyon, ditch, and road cut after himself. Sheesh what an egomaniac!” 😃 There’s those WATCH FOR FALLING ROCK and DEER CROSSING signs. Deer Crossing was a Native American woman who went in search of her beloved, Falling Rock, who had gone missing … ---
**Author:** ![Riemann](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/riemann/32/3133_2.png) [@Riemann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Riemann)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2016, 11:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-thoroughly-irritate-you-for-no-valid-reason/764673/116 "2016-09-03T23:15:58Z")
> [@Rick\_Kitchen](#): > > There’s those WATCH FOR FALLING ROCK and DEER CROSSING signs. Deer Crossing was a Native American woman who went in search of her beloved, Falling Rock, who had gone missing … …perhaps he was murdered by thieves trying to steal the Rolex she gave him as an anniversary gift? ---
**Author:** ![eschereal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eschereal/32/18939_2.png) [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2016, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-thoroughly-irritate-you-for-no-valid-reason/764673/117 "2016-09-03T23:21:03Z")
My brother once spun out the story of Falling Rock, but Deer Crossing was not in it. ---
**Author:** ![Earl\_Snake-Hips\_Tucker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/earl_snake-hips_tucker/32/3269_2.png) [@Earl\_Snake-Hips\_Tucker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Earl_Snake-Hips_Tucker)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2016, 2:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-thoroughly-irritate-you-for-no-valid-reason/764673/118 "2016-09-04T02:20:40Z")
[Roly Poly](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roly_Poly), a regional sandwich/wraps fast food chain. Have no idea if their stuff is any good. I’d never eat there because I think the name’s stupid. ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2016, 2:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-thoroughly-irritate-you-for-no-valid-reason/764673/119 "2016-09-04T02:50:41Z")
> [@Earl\_Snake-Hips\_Tucker](#): > > [Roly Poly](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roly_Poly), a regional sandwich/wraps fast food chain. Have no idea if their stuff is any good. I’d never eat there because I think the name’s stupid. I had totally forgotten about that chain; there was one in my old town. I’m not a wrap fan myself, and the ones I had from there weren’t very good. The drug reps would sometimes bring them in when I worked at the hospital, so for the most part, I didn’t have to pay for them. ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2016, 2:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-thoroughly-irritate-you-for-no-valid-reason/764673/120 "2016-09-04T02:51:45Z")
> [@Rick\_Kitchen](#): > > There’s a store in town here called Bulbs n Batteries. And that’s all they sell. It’s a franchise, as is Cartridge World which sells only ink cartridges. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-thoroughly-irritate-you-for-no-valid-reason/764673.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/business-names-that-thoroughly-irritate-you-for-no-valid-reason/764673.md?page=7)