# Busted: "The Masturbator" ran away screaming **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 16, 2012, 11:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/busted-the-masturbator-ran-away-screaming/644177 "2012-12-16T11:41:37Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 11\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Hypno-Toad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b2d939/32.png) [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2013, 2:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/busted-the-masturbator-ran-away-screaming/644177/41 "2013-02-25T14:04:59Z")
Just to be clear, this guy’s not leaving a mess behind, is he? Because that’s just way too gross for me. I’d not be bothered at all if someone just jerked this guy off the car. He has it coming. ---
**Author:** ![SeaDragonTattoo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df705f/32.png) [@SeaDragonTattoo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SeaDragonTattoo)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2013, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/busted-the-masturbator-ran-away-screaming/644177/42 "2013-02-25T18:38:53Z")
No mess. No blatant exposure. It all stays in his pants. Still gross, though. ---
**Author:** ![YogSothoth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/8edcca/32.png) [@YogSothoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YogSothoth)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2013, 6:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/busted-the-masturbator-ran-away-screaming/644177/43 "2013-02-25T18:59:26Z")
“The Masturbator” has the worst superpower out of anybody in the Justice League ---
**Author:** ![Doctor\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctor_jackson/32/32_2.png) [@Doctor\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2013, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/busted-the-masturbator-ran-away-screaming/644177/44 "2013-02-25T20:18:05Z")
> [@YogSosoth](#): > > “The Masturbator” has the worst superpower out of anybody in the Justice League And yet s/he seems so content. ---
**Author:** ![Hypno-Toad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b2d939/32.png) [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2013, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/busted-the-masturbator-ran-away-screaming/644177/45 "2013-02-25T20:36:46Z")
If he fought with Batman, there’d be a huge sound effect balloon: FAP! ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2013, 11:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/busted-the-masturbator-ran-away-screaming/644177/46 "2013-02-25T23:03:35Z")
> [@Zeke\_N.Destroi](#): > > But there is another very compelling and moving thread [elsewhere on the board](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=682232) where people express empathy not only for a fellow Doper but also a covicted sex offender and suspected pedophile. Don’t you think there might be a wee bit of difference between committing suicide because you are a pedophile, and getting busted for bopping the baloney on public transport? If **SeaDragonTattoo** had started the thread by saying “my friend just got scared off the bus by a passenger who didn’t care for him jerking off”, I don’t think it would have had the same cachet. YMMV. Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![Clothahump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@Clothahump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clothahump)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2013, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/busted-the-masturbator-ran-away-screaming/644177/47 "2013-02-26T15:36:23Z")
> [@SeaDragonTattoo](#): > > I’m a little curious what I’ll do when I see him again, too. What I think about doing in the meantime and what actually happens tend to be different things a lot of the time! I think I will try to get a pic or video next time, before yelling at him. If you aren’t going to start carrying a knife, I think Mace is indicated here. And good on ya for speaking up in the first place! ---
**Author:** ![kenobi\_65](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kenobi_65/32/13178_2.png) [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2013, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/busted-the-masturbator-ran-away-screaming/644177/48 "2013-02-26T16:08:35Z")
> [@Clothahump](#): > > If you aren’t going to start carrying a knife, I think Mace is indicated here. Just wanted to point out the amusing username / thread topic overlap. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![cmkeller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmkeller/32/118_2.png) [@cmkeller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmkeller)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2013, 5:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/busted-the-masturbator-ran-away-screaming/644177/49 "2013-02-26T17:17:04Z")
YogSosoth: > [@](#): > > “The Masturbator” has the worst superpower out of anybody in the Justice League What if he teamed up with [the Pro](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Pro_(comics))? ---
**Author:** ![Aspenglow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aspenglow/32/76_2.png) [@Aspenglow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aspenglow)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2022, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/busted-the-masturbator-ran-away-screaming/644177/50 "2022-09-07T18:09:34Z")
3 posts were split to a new topic: [AndTheBeatGoesOn Trock Posts](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/andthebeatgoeson-trock-posts/971154) ---
**Author:** ![Aspenglow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aspenglow/32/76_2.png) [@Aspenglow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aspenglow)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2022, 5:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/busted-the-masturbator-ran-away-screaming/644177/53 "2022-09-07T17:54:50Z")
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