# Butcher a phrase with the magic of Punctuation! **URL:** \ **Category:** The Game Room\ **Created:** [March 27, 2008, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butcher-a-phrase-with-the-magic-of-punctuation/442925 "2008-03-27T16:19:03Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![The\_Controvert](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/dec6dc/32.png) [@The\_Controvert](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Controvert)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2008, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butcher-a-phrase-with-the-magic-of-punctuation/442925/1 "2008-03-27T16:19:03Z")
Here is Mr. Meatloaf expressing his love / hate relationship with butt sex. I would do anything, butt love…, but I won’t do that! I would do anything, but love butt, I won’t do that! ---
**Author:** ![Wee\_Bairn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/90db22/32.png) [@Wee\_Bairn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wee_Bairn)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2008, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butcher-a-phrase-with-the-magic-of-punctuation/442925/2 "2008-03-27T16:28:07Z")
Work on contingency- no money down! Work on contingency? No, money down! ---
**Author:** ![Euryphaessa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Euryphaessa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Euryphaessa)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2008, 6:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butcher-a-phrase-with-the-magic-of-punctuation/442925/3 "2008-03-27T18:59:27Z")
I had to help my uncle Jack off his horse. I had to help my uncle jack off his horse. ---
**Author:** ![si\_blakely](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d9b06d/32.png) [@si\_blakely](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/si_blakely)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2008, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butcher-a-phrase-with-the-magic-of-punctuation/442925/4 "2008-03-27T19:20:42Z")
The male kiwi eats roots and leaves. The male kiwi eats, roots, and leaves. (much more interesting than those stupid pandas) Si ---
**Author:** ![Trunk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/87869e/32.png) [@Trunk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trunk)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2008, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butcher-a-phrase-with-the-magic-of-punctuation/442925/5 "2008-03-27T19:22:08Z")
Fuck _you_? My wife has her colon every 28 days. ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2008, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butcher-a-phrase-with-the-magic-of-punctuation/442925/6 "2008-03-27T19:25:15Z")
There were two other, malefactors. There were two other malefactors. (Christ’s co-crucifiction recipients.) ---
**Author:** ![pantheon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/6bbea6/32.png) [@pantheon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pantheon)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2008, 7:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butcher-a-phrase-with-the-magic-of-punctuation/442925/7 "2008-03-27T19:29:01Z")
They do respect her butt; they love to watch her strut 😜 ---
**Author:** ![Cisco](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ccd318/32.png) [@Cisco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cisco)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2008, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butcher-a-phrase-with-the-magic-of-punctuation/442925/8 "2008-03-27T20:01:31Z")
Yo tengo 26 años - I am 26 years old Yo tengo 26 anos - I have 26 anuses ---
**Author:** ![Duck\_Duck\_Goose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/50afbb/32.png) [@Duck\_Duck\_Goose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duck_Duck_Goose)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2008, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butcher-a-phrase-with-the-magic-of-punctuation/442925/9 "2008-03-27T20:01:57Z")
[QUOTE=si\_blakely] The male kiwi eats roots and leaves. The male kiwi eats, roots, and leaves. [/QUOTE] Interesting–over here, the punch line goes, “Eats shoots and leaves”. ---
**Author:** ![Moe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/moe/32/2972_2.png) [@Moe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moe)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2008, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butcher-a-phrase-with-the-magic-of-punctuation/442925/10 "2008-03-27T20:12:52Z")
The penis; mightier than the S-word. ---
**Author:** ![Moe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/moe/32/2972_2.png) [@Moe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moe)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2008, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butcher-a-phrase-with-the-magic-of-punctuation/442925/11 "2008-03-27T20:14:43Z")
Also, not quite in the same vein, but I always wanted to say to a musician named Benjamin: Hey Benjamin, been jamin’? ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2008, 8:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butcher-a-phrase-with-the-magic-of-punctuation/442925/12 "2008-03-27T20:37:20Z")
William Kennedy Smith, therapist. William Kennedy Smith, the rapist. ---
**Author:** ![rowrrbazzle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rowrrbazzle/32/414_2.png) [@rowrrbazzle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rowrrbazzle)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2008, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butcher-a-phrase-with-the-magic-of-punctuation/442925/13 "2008-03-27T21:38:37Z")
What is this thing called love? What is this thing called, love? ---
**Author:** ![pinkfreud](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pinkfreud/32/17603_2.png) [@pinkfreud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pinkfreud)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2008, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butcher-a-phrase-with-the-magic-of-punctuation/442925/14 "2008-03-27T21:43:08Z")
Let’s start eating, Raoul. Let’s start eating Raoul. Let’s start [Eating Raoul](http://imdb.com/title/tt0083869/). ---
**Author:** ![lobotomyboy63](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobotomyboy63/32/2900_2.png) [@lobotomyboy63](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lobotomyboy63)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2008, 9:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butcher-a-phrase-with-the-magic-of-punctuation/442925/15 "2008-03-27T21:48:50Z")
The three stages of sex in a marriage… At first, you’re young and horny and have sex three times a week: tri-weekly. Then the job stresses you out and you start having kids, so if you’re lucky, once a week: try weekly. Finally you’re so old and broken down you barely have the energy: try weakly. OK, doesn’t quite fit the OP but so what? ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2008, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butcher-a-phrase-with-the-magic-of-punctuation/442925/16 "2008-03-27T22:05:38Z")
How to cook humans. How to cook for humans. How to cook forty humans. How to cook for forty humans. It’s from the Simpsons, for those who absolutely insist on references ---
**Author:** ![Greg\_Charles](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/839c29/32.png) [@Greg\_Charles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Greg_Charles)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2008, 11:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butcher-a-phrase-with-the-magic-of-punctuation/442925/17 "2008-03-27T23:40:33Z")
A good dog knows it’s master. ---
**Author:** ![Cisco](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ccd318/32.png) [@Cisco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cisco)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2008, 11:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butcher-a-phrase-with-the-magic-of-punctuation/442925/18 "2008-03-27T23:44:41Z")
[QUOTE=Ludovic] It’s from the Simpsons, for those who absolutely insist on references [/QUOTE] Did you know it was a Twilight Zone reference? [To Serve Man](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/To_Serve_Man_(The_Twilight_Zone)). ---
**Author:** ![Farmwoman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8dc957/32.png) [@Farmwoman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Farmwoman)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2008, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butcher-a-phrase-with-the-magic-of-punctuation/442925/19 "2008-03-27T23:49:22Z")
My 8 year old never gets tired of these: Feed the dogs Jonah. What’s for dinner – Mommy? ---
**Author:** ![Farmwoman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8dc957/32.png) [@Farmwoman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Farmwoman)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2008, 11:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butcher-a-phrase-with-the-magic-of-punctuation/442925/20 "2008-03-27T23:52:11Z")
Butch…her? A phrase with the magic of punctuation. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butcher-a-phrase-with-the-magic-of-punctuation/442925.md?page=2)