# "Butthurt"? **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [April 9, 2014, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butthurt/685743 "2014-04-09T19:09:47Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![slowlearner](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a88e57/32.png) [@slowlearner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/slowlearner)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2014, 12:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butthurt/685743/21 "2014-04-10T00:43:43Z")
If it were referring to anal sex it would be _Butthurtsogood_. ---
**Author:** ![ThisUsernameIsForbidden](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b4bc9f/32.png) [@ThisUsernameIsForbidden](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThisUsernameIsForbidden)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2014, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butthurt/685743/22 "2014-04-10T01:00:47Z")
> [@JSexton](#): > > 102 would be intermediate trolling at best, if not a continuation of basic trolling. Not in my class. Once you go through 101 you have graduated to advanced. 101 consists mainly of self-defense techniques. From there, students are free to develop their own methods of attack, with little guidance. Think of it as graduate work on trollery. ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Scrappy\_Hero\_Pup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ea5d25/32.png) [@Happy\_Scrappy\_Hero\_Pup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Scrappy_Hero_Pup)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2014, 2:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butthurt/685743/23 "2014-04-10T02:03:44Z")
> [@njtt](#): > > I think that what is most unpleasant about it is precisely that it is used as a way of invalidating someone else’s suffering. It is a nasty way, to which there is no good comeback, of saying your pain does not count. Butthurt is, by definition, invalid suffering. It does not count, and the person who IS butthurt is attention-whorishly asserting otherewise. That’s why it’s mocked. ---
**Author:** ![Pedro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/919ad9/32.png) [@Pedro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pedro)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2014, 2:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butthurt/685743/24 "2014-04-10T02:08:29Z")
I always assumed it was a reference to anal sex. The person seeks the sex, supposedly because it’s pleasurable, but then complains after the act because their butt is sore. Appropriate usage: you seek a debate, because you’re so smart and well versed in the oratory arts (no pun intended), then act like a cry baby when you lose the argument. Butthurt! I think it’s funny. ---
**Author:** ![Green\_Bean](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/green_bean/32/1760_2.png) [@Green\_Bean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Green_Bean)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2014, 2:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butthurt/685743/25 "2014-04-10T02:14:20Z")
I think I always related it somehow to the expression “that really chaps my ass.” The connotation was to irritated buttcheeks rather than anal sex regardless. ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2014, 2:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butthurt/685743/26 "2014-04-10T02:18:18Z")
> [@Omar\_Little](#): > > …but if you’re gonna be all butthurt about it, I guess your entitled. I see what you did there. 😉 Regarding the homosexual connotation, everyone seems to be missing the point. It’s not about anal sex – it’s about receiving unwanted, unwelcome and unexpected anal sex. I’d imagine that even gay men would get, umm, rather butthurt over something like that! ---
**Author:** ![ThisUsernameIsForbidden](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b4bc9f/32.png) [@ThisUsernameIsForbidden](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThisUsernameIsForbidden)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2014, 2:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butthurt/685743/27 "2014-04-10T02:42:03Z")
Reminds me of a joke I read in another thread: I’ve got a friend who cries after sex…he’s in prison. ---
**Author:** ![racepug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f1d935/32.png) [@racepug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/racepug)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2014, 10:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butthurt/685743/28 "2014-04-10T10:04:07Z")
> [@John\_Mace](#): > > Except I always associated with a ridiculously large over-reaction to something. Not invalidating someone’s suffering, but calling out someone’s whining about something that is just no big deal. Examples can often be found in ATMB threads. 🙂 Yeah, except just who is to say what “too much whining” or “no big deal” is? There’s no clear definition. I was commenting one time on a sports-related issue. ONE time on something that I thought was entirely valid. Next thing I knew some jackass referred to me as being “butthurt” over the issue in question. In that case I think it was more a matter of “I don’t care about the issue you’re complaining about so SHUT IT” rather than “I think your complaints are over-the-top.” That’s precisely why I think it’s so insulting (well, that and the fact that it’s such a VULGAR term). ---
**Author:** ![racepug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f1d935/32.png) [@racepug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/racepug)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2014, 10:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butthurt/685743/29 "2014-04-10T10:06:06Z")
> [@Max\_the\_Immortal](#): > > Yeah. I always interpreted it as being along the lines mocking someone for over-reacting. “You lost a football game (which is trivial), but you’re reacting as though you were anally raped (which would be awful).” Yeah. Gross. Who ever came up with the term has absolutely no class as far as I’m concerned. ---
**Author:** ![FriarTed](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/friarted/32/1052_2.png) [@FriarTed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FriarTed)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2014, 10:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butthurt/685743/30 "2014-04-10T10:20:47Z")
> [@racepug](#): > > Yeah. Gross. Who ever came up with the term has absolutely no class as far as I’m concerned. Except that the term apparently didn’t originate as meaning that so don’t get all put out about it. ---
**Author:** ![Jesta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Jesta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jesta)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2014, 11:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butthurt/685743/31 "2014-04-10T11:20:38Z")
I always just presumed that if you were considered butthurt, you were acting as if you considered the other person ‘a pain in the arse\backside’ some sort of self determined right to be obnoxious because of the original occurrence. ---
**Author:** ![Eyebrows\_0f\_Doom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eyebrows_0f_doom/32/3119_2.png) [@Eyebrows\_0f\_Doom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eyebrows_0f_Doom)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2014, 3:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butthurt/685743/32 "2014-04-10T15:16:09Z")
Never associated the phrase with anal sex. It makes me think of someone who got spanked for doing something wrong. I think those of you who are trying to make this a sexual reference are really reaching to find offense. ---
**Author:** ![doorhinge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a5b964/32.png) [@doorhinge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/doorhinge)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2014, 3:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butthurt/685743/33 "2014-04-10T15:34:40Z")
The problem with using recently invented words is that there is no official/agreed upon/dictionary definition of the word. Person A uses the term butthurt to convey, hopefully, a specific meaning. Person B hears the term butthurt and assumes an entirely different meaning. Anger follows. Communication fails. Hilarity ensues. ---
**Author:** ![Bozuit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/edb3f5/32.png) [@Bozuit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bozuit)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2014, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butthurt/685743/34 "2014-04-10T15:47:53Z")
I’ve never actually thought about the origins of the word. But I’m a little unclear as to why, even if it is a reference to anal sex, it should be homophobic. ---
**Author:** ![Thudlow\_Boink](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thudlow_boink/32/320_2.png) [@Thudlow\_Boink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thudlow_Boink)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2014, 4:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butthurt/685743/35 "2014-04-10T16:07:54Z")
> [@Eyebrows\_0f\_Doom](#): > > Never associated the phrase with anal sex. It makes me think of someone who got spanked for doing something wrong. I think those of you who are trying to make this a sexual reference are really reaching to find offense. [Or they’re just obsessed with anal sex.](http://www.bouldertherapist.com/html/humor/MentalHealthHumor/rorschach.html) ---
**Author:** ![racepug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f1d935/32.png) [@racepug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/racepug)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2014, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butthurt/685743/36 "2014-04-10T16:43:37Z")
> [@doorhinge](#): > > The problem with using recently invented words is that there is no official/agreed upon/dictionary definition of the word. Person A uses the term butthurt to convey, hopefully, a specific meaning. Person B hears the term butthurt and assumes an entirely different meaning. Anger follows. Communication fails. Hilarity ensues. What s/he posted. I don’t care what you think the origin of the term is, it’s an ugly term. Case closed. ---
**Author:** ![KneadToKnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kneadtoknow/32/3999_2.png) [@KneadToKnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KneadToKnow)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2014, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butthurt/685743/37 "2014-04-10T16:55:07Z")
> [@doorhinge](#): > > Person A uses the term butthurt to convey, hopefully, a specific meaning. Person B hears the term butthurt and assumes an entirely different meaning. Anger follows. Communication fails. Communication only fails when person B fails to realize they don’t know what the word means and doesn’t bother to find out. (“Hey, A, what do you mean by ‘butthurt’ exactly?”) It’s not unique to new words, either. Consider the great many people who get their panties in a twist over words like _[niggardly](http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/niggardly)_. Plenty of people get their backs up over that word even though it _has_ got a centuries-old dictionary entry. ---
**Author:** ![SpeedwayRyan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce7236/32.png) [@SpeedwayRyan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SpeedwayRyan)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2014, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butthurt/685743/38 "2014-04-10T16:59:16Z")
It’s a pretty funny term either way, but I always assumed it was an anal sex reference too. Like, after someone has their way with you, you sit around crying and butthurt. I never really considered any other meaning…when I first heard it, it seemed too insulting and mean-spirited/degrading to mean something about a kid getting spanked. ---
**Author:** ![doorhinge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a5b964/32.png) [@doorhinge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/doorhinge)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2014, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butthurt/685743/39 "2014-04-10T17:15:55Z")
> [@KneadToKnow](#): > > Communication only fails when person B fails to realize they don’t know what the word means and doesn’t bother to find out. (“Hey, A, what do you mean by ‘butthurt’ exactly?”) While communication is definitely a two-way street, it is Person A who is attempting to transmit a message/thought to Person B. Using made-up or non-standard words isn’t going to help the situation. Person B has the option of asking for clarification from Person A, but as you can see from this thread, many people don’t make the effort or stick with their own definition of the word. A good rule of thumb is that if YOU are trying to reach an audience, YOU need to speak a language that your audience understands. Or you can spend time straitening out any misconceptions later. ---
**Author:** ![KneadToKnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kneadtoknow/32/3999_2.png) [@KneadToKnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KneadToKnow)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2014, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butthurt/685743/40 "2014-04-10T17:21:11Z")
> [@doorhinge](#): > > While communication is definitely a two-way street, it is Person A who is attempting to transmit a message/thought to Person B. Using made-up or non-standard words isn’t going to help the situation. Person B has the option of asking for clarification from Person A, but as you can see from this thread, many people don’t make the effort or stick with their own definition of the word. > > A good rule of thumb is that if YOU are trying to reach an audience, YOU need to speak a language that your audience understands. Or you can spend time straitening out any misconceptions later. I’ll take my chances. I’d rather live in a world that has Shakespeare and Lewis Carroll than a world where everything reads like the instruction manual to a stereo. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butthurt/685743.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/butthurt/685743.md?page=3)