# Calories in Semen **URL:** \ **Category:** Cecil's Columns/Staff Reports\ **Created:** [February 12, 2009, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/calories-in-semen/485542 "2009-02-12T15:48:20Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Irishman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b487fb/32.png) [@Irishman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Irishman)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2009, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/calories-in-semen/485542/1 "2009-02-12T15:48:20Z")
From the article, Lynn W. said: > [@](#): > > Is it because semen looks like egg white (after all, we all know it certainly doesn’t taste like egg white). We do? _We all_ do? What I want to know is, who goes around tasting raw egg white, and why? ---
**Author:** ![Khampelf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Khampelf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khampelf)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2009, 4:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/calories-in-semen/485542/2 "2009-02-12T16:23:56Z")
I hear that tasting egg whites first thing in the morning will make you want to run up and down the steps of the Philadelphia Museum of Art. Oh, leave me Stallone, someone had to say it. ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2009, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/calories-in-semen/485542/3 "2009-02-12T18:16:15Z")
Leave the yolks to the professionals. ---
**Author:** ![Khampelf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Khampelf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khampelf)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2009, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/calories-in-semen/485542/4 "2009-02-12T21:41:28Z")
> [@Cervaise](#): > > Leave the yolks to the professionals. I’ve been asked many times “What are you? Albumin comedian?” ETA - I’ve a feeling this thread is ova. ---
**Author:** ![ivan\_astikov](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/58f4c7/32.png) [@ivan\_astikov](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivan_astikov)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2009, 10:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/calories-in-semen/485542/5 "2009-02-12T22:26:24Z")
Eggsactly. ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2009, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/calories-in-semen/485542/6 "2009-02-12T22:35:36Z")
Are you guys done egging each other on yet? (To the OP: I’ve tasted egg whites, and there’s a good chance you have too. They’re called meringue, like on lemon meringue pie. I’ve also tasted them inadvertently when cracking eggs for cooking and slopping a little egg white onto a fingertip. They don’t taste like much; certainly they don’t taste like semen.) ---
**Author:** ![SiXSwordS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/49beb7/32.png) [@SiXSwordS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SiXSwordS)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2009, 11:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/calories-in-semen/485542/7 "2009-02-12T23:57:56Z")
O cum on you guys, knock it off! did i do it right? ---
**Author:** ![SeanArenas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df705f/32.png) [@SeanArenas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SeanArenas)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2009, 12:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/calories-in-semen/485542/8 "2009-02-13T00:21:26Z")
No **eggs** ageration, WhyNot, I think the comparison is more about the consistency than the flavor. I certainly don’t know from a taste comparison (I’ve only tasted egg, not semen) but I’d guess a sugared-up meringue isn’t what was in mind here. Do we have any **eggs** perts here? Maybe they can tell us which egg-white format has the closest taste, **eggs** etera. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2009, 2:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/calories-in-semen/485542/9 "2009-02-13T02:48:32Z")
> [@SiXSwordS](#): > > O cum on you guys, knock it off! > > did i do it right? Way too soon, and anticlimactic. ---
**Author:** ![Khampelf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Khampelf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khampelf)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2009, 3:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/calories-in-semen/485542/10 "2009-02-13T03:17:04Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#): > > Way too soon, and anticlimactic. So, would it be un-semenly soon to offer **SeanArens** premature congratulations? ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2009, 3:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/calories-in-semen/485542/11 "2009-02-13T03:42:29Z")
Obligatory [Pan-fried semen thread](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=198659). ---
**Author:** ![Chez\_Guevara](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/aeb1de/32.png) [@Chez\_Guevara](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chez_Guevara)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2009, 9:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/calories-in-semen/485542/12 "2009-02-13T09:24:42Z")
[Link to column](http://www.straightdope.com/columns/read/46/how-many-calories-are-in-the-average-male-ejaculation). > [@](#): > > Is it because semen looks like egg white (after all, we all know it certainly doesn’t taste like egg white). I guess that the taste of egg white is pretty consistent across the range, but I naturally expect to be corrected if I am wrong. However, it seems that the subtle flavours enjoyed by the semen taster vary according to the diet followed by the semen producer. Rather than loiter on street corners conducting my own survey among passers-by, I would like to offer some conclusions obtained by trawling the internet for anecdotal evidence. The healthier a man is, the better his semen tastes. The discerning consumer should seek out a non-smoking vegetarian who eschews coffee but drinks vast quantities of cranberry juice. Or water. These liquids dilute the concentration of salts and minerals contained in the semen, thus providing a more palatable dining experience for gourmets of the male sexual fluid. Consumers should at all costs avoid semen which is tainted by a diet laden with garlic and onions. This piece of wisdom must explain why, on those occasions when I have escorted women to dinner where onions have featured on the menu, I have not been subsequently invited into their homes ‘for coffee’. Garbage in, garbage out. Let those be our watchwords. ---
**Author:** ![SiXSwordS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/49beb7/32.png) [@SiXSwordS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SiXSwordS)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2009, 1:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/calories-in-semen/485542/13 "2009-02-13T13:05:13Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#): > > Way too soon, and anticlimactic. I meant to respond to this last night, but I must have dozed off. Can I make it up to you with breakfast? Egg white omelet? As for the taste of semen, I’m sure I have tasted it, but I can’t recall any particular flavor. It does seem to have a very distinctive smell though and the opinions I’ve heard seem to be that while the taste may vary, the smell does not. Unfortunately, my sample size is far too small to allow for valid generalization. ---
**Author:** ![PaulParkhead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7ea924/32.png) [@PaulParkhead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PaulParkhead)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2009, 3:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/calories-in-semen/485542/14 "2009-02-14T03:59:44Z")
> [@SiXSwordS](#): > > Unfortunately, my sample size is far too small to allow for valid generalization. I suspect they’d tell me the same thing at the clinic. ETA: Dammit! There was a joke in there, but it obviously misfired. Now all I can do is clean up the mess. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2009, 6:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/calories-in-semen/485542/15 "2009-02-14T06:07:39Z")
> [@PaulParkhead](#): > > I suspect they’d tell me the same thing at the clinic. > > ETA: Dammit! There was a joke in there, but it obviously misfired. Now all I can do is clean up the mess. No need to be so hard-on yourself. ---
**Author:** ![Khampelf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Khampelf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khampelf)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2009, 12:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/calories-in-semen/485542/16 "2009-02-14T12:26:30Z")
> [@Khampelf](#): > > So, would it be un-semenly soon to offer **SeanArens** premature congratulations? Oooops. Meant **SixSword** s. ---
**Author:** ![AskNott](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asknott/32/5790_2.png) [@AskNott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AskNott)\ **Post date:** [February 16, 2009, 4:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/calories-in-semen/485542/17 "2009-02-16T16:51:59Z")
Perhaps this can be researched further, later this year, when scientists make another pass at using the Large Hardon Collector. The first attempt was rebuffed. ---
**Author:** ![sergeirichard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/59ef9b/32.png) [@sergeirichard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sergeirichard)\ **Post date:** [February 16, 2009, 9:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/calories-in-semen/485542/18 "2009-02-16T21:27:00Z")
> [@Chez\_Guevara](#): > > [Link to column](http://www.straightdope.com/columns/read/46/how-many-calories-are-in-the-average-male-ejaculation). > Consumers should at all costs avoid semen which is tainted by a diet laden with garlic and onions. Hey, some people like those! And though it may be tasteless to mention, such strong ingredients affect the female flavor too. But then, if it doesn’t make your eyes water you’re probably not doing it right. ---
**Author:** ![SiXSwordS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/49beb7/32.png) [@SiXSwordS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SiXSwordS)\ **Post date:** [February 16, 2009, 9:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/calories-in-semen/485542/19 "2009-02-16T21:33:47Z")
> [@sergeirichard](#): > > …such strong ingredients affect the female flavor too. Do you mean the ejaculate (when present) or the general vaginal scent? I have noticed a difference from woman to woman, but not in the same woman from day to day. At least not a noticeable “flavor” difference. ---
**Author:** ![sergeirichard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/59ef9b/32.png) [@sergeirichard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sergeirichard)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2009, 12:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/calories-in-semen/485542/20 "2009-02-18T12:21:36Z")
General vaginal flavor. For several days…