# Can Chuck Norris be anymore of a dumb ass? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 12, 2010, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-chuck-norris-be-anymore-of-a-dumb-ass/524707 "2010-01-12T20:36:58Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![joebuck20](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/74df32/32.png) [@joebuck20](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joebuck20)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2010, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-chuck-norris-be-anymore-of-a-dumb-ass/524707/1 "2010-01-12T20:36:58Z")
I think he took a few too many blows to the head: \*\*Chuck Norris Hunts for Obama’s ‘Secret Vault’ as Interpol Conspiracy Theories Get Wilder \*\* [http://blog.newsweek.com/blogs/declassified/archive/2010/01/12/chuck-norris-hunts-for-obama-s-secret-vault-as-interpol-conspiracy-theories-get-wilder.aspx](http://blog.newsweek.com/blogs/declassified/archive/2010/01/12/chuck-norris-hunts-for-obama-s-secret-vault-as-interpol-conspiracy-theories-get-wilder.aspx) Man, this guy is a fucking idiot. Here is just one stellar example of his bullshit line of thinking: > [@](#): > > “Is it merely coincidental that Obama signed this executive Interpol order, and that the following events are converging at this time in American history: the U.S. withdrawal from Iraq, the closure of Guantanamo Bay terrorist detention facility, Obama’s indifference and even defense of Islamic extremists like the Fort Hood shooter or Northwest flight 253’s attempted bomber?” ---
**Author:** ![XT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/xt/32/456_2.png) [@XT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/XT)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2010, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-chuck-norris-be-anymore-of-a-dumb-ass/524707/2 "2010-01-12T20:38:50Z")
When did we start withdrawing from Iraq, and when did we decide we were closing Gitmo? On the other hand, those tee shirts with the moods of Chuck Norris are pretty amusing… -XT ---
**Author:** ![Merijeek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f05b48/32.png) [@Merijeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Merijeek)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2010, 8:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-chuck-norris-be-anymore-of-a-dumb-ass/524707/3 "2010-01-12T20:41:28Z")
> [@joebuck20](#): > > I think he took a few too many blows to the head: > > \*\*Chuck Norris Hunts for Obama’s ‘Secret Vault’ as Interpol Conspiracy Theories Get Wilder \*\* > > [http://blog.newsweek.com/blogs/declassified/archive/2010/01/12/chuck-norris-hunts-for-obama-s-secret-vault-as-interpol-conspiracy-theories-get-wilder.aspx](http://blog.newsweek.com/blogs/declassified/archive/2010/01/12/chuck-norris-hunts-for-obama-s-secret-vault-as-interpol-conspiracy-theories-get-wilder.aspx) > > Man, this guy is a fucking idiot. > > Here is just one stellar example of his bullshit line of thinking: Maybe he and OJ can form a crimefighting duo - searching for murderers and conspiracies on America’s golf courses. -Joe ---
**Author:** ![Simplicio](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c37758/32.png) [@Simplicio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Simplicio)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2010, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-chuck-norris-be-anymore-of-a-dumb-ass/524707/4 "2010-01-12T20:45:16Z")
I kind of admire someone that can hold that many contradictory thoughts in their head at once. According to Norris, Obama is both not going after terrorist enough (or even on their side) and giving the International organization that shares information about terrorists too much power. He’s also both weak on terror for having public trials of terrorists, but also insidiously hiding information about terrorists in a _ahem_ secret vault. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Tooth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c67d28/32.png) [@The\_Tooth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Tooth)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2010, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-chuck-norris-be-anymore-of-a-dumb-ass/524707/5 "2010-01-12T20:45:54Z")
> [@joebuck20](#): > > I think he took a few too many blows to the head: Really? I recommend more. The brain is dead as evidenced by the columns he writes, but the body’s still a-twitchin’. ---
**Author:** ![Fleetwood](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fleetwood/32/271_2.png) [@Fleetwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fleetwood)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2010, 8:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-chuck-norris-be-anymore-of-a-dumb-ass/524707/6 "2010-01-12T20:46:07Z")
> [@xtisme](#): > > When did we start withdrawing from Iraq, and **when did we decide we were closing Gitmo?** > > -XT One of the first things on the adgenda: [Obama signs order to close Guantanamo Bay facility - CNN.com](http://www.cnn.com/2009/POLITICS/01/22/guantanamo.order/index.html) ---
**Author:** ![armedmonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@armedmonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/armedmonkey)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2010, 8:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-chuck-norris-be-anymore-of-a-dumb-ass/524707/7 "2010-01-12T20:51:34Z")
> [@xtisme](#): > > When did we start withdrawing from Iraq, and when did we decide we were closing Gitmo? The Iraq withdrawal decision was announced in Feb, 2009 and is scheduled to begin in August of this year. Obama originally promised he would shut Gitmo down, but has since backed off of that decision. However, both decisions have fuck-all to do with Interpol And Chuck Norris is a lunatic, which makes him doubly dangerous. This latest incident reminds me of the time a blind man stepped on Chuck Norris’ shoe. Chuck said, “Don’t you know who I am? I’m Chuck Norris!” and the mere mention of his name cured the man’s blindness. Sadly the first, last, and only thing this man ever saw was a fatal roundhouse delivered by Chuck Norris. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2010, 8:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-chuck-norris-be-anymore-of-a-dumb-ass/524707/8 "2010-01-12T20:52:10Z")
He’s going senile. ---
**Author:** ![KarlGauss](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/karlgauss/32/3713_2.png) [@KarlGauss](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KarlGauss)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2010, 8:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-chuck-norris-be-anymore-of-a-dumb-ass/524707/9 "2010-01-12T20:52:13Z")
The last part of the article makes a terrific, and rather ironic, point: > [@Chuck Norris Hunts for Obama's 'Secret Vault' as Interpol Conspiracy Theories Get Wilder](#): > > For another reality check, take a look at [this posting](http://www.nraila.org/legislation/read.aspx?id=5284%20)—just up on the National Rifle Association’s site—which dissects the conspiracy claims about Obama’s executive order and concludes they are hogwash. > > What does it say about the state of political discourse when the NRA is the voice of reason? In case it’s not obvious, the link in the quote above is ‘active’. ---
**Author:** ![kidchameleon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/898d66/32.png) [@kidchameleon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kidchameleon)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2010, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-chuck-norris-be-anymore-of-a-dumb-ass/524707/10 "2010-01-12T20:55:41Z")
Man, first Tony Dungy, now Joe Buck, can’t you football announcers just keep out of politics? I swear if Joe Theisman starts complaining about GOP here, I’m gonna leave. ---
**Author:** ![Euphonious\_Polemic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/euphonious_polemic/32/3002_2.png) [@Euphonious\_Polemic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Euphonious_Polemic)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2010, 9:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-chuck-norris-be-anymore-of-a-dumb-ass/524707/11 "2010-01-12T21:00:12Z")
When Chuck Norris finds the secret vault, he will use his superhuman strength to fling it into the sun. ---
**Author:** ![ivan\_astikov](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/58f4c7/32.png) [@ivan\_astikov](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivan_astikov)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2010, 9:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-chuck-norris-be-anymore-of-a-dumb-ass/524707/12 "2010-01-12T21:00:35Z")
But who’s going to say it to Chuck’s face? I’ve got a bad back, so I can’t do it. ---
**Author:** ![Jack\_Batty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jack_batty/32/3201_2.png) [@Jack\_Batty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jack_Batty)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2010, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-chuck-norris-be-anymore-of-a-dumb-ass/524707/13 "2010-01-12T21:01:10Z")
> [@kidchameleon](#): > > Man, first Tony Dungy, now Joe Buck, can’t you football announcers just keep out of politics? I swear if Joe Theisman starts complaining about GOP here, I’m gonna leave. I dont think Joe Theisman even knows how to spell GOP, let alone have an opinion on them. ---
**Author:** ![otternell](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ecc23a/32.png) [@otternell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/otternell)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2010, 9:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-chuck-norris-be-anymore-of-a-dumb-ass/524707/14 "2010-01-12T21:03:31Z")
> [@KarlGauss](#): > > The last part of the article makes a terrific, and rather ironic, point:In case it’s not obvious, the link in the quote above is ‘active’. I thought this sentence was hilarious! 🙂 ETA: the sentence about the NRA being the voice of reason. ---
**Author:** ![Michael\_Ellis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/977dab/32.png) [@Michael\_Ellis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Michael_Ellis)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2010, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-chuck-norris-be-anymore-of-a-dumb-ass/524707/15 "2010-01-12T21:32:25Z")
> [@Chimera](#): > > He’s going senile. _Going_ senile? He’s already senile. ---
**Author:** ![Squink](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b5e925/32.png) [@Squink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Squink)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2010, 9:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-chuck-norris-be-anymore-of-a-dumb-ass/524707/16 "2010-01-12T21:48:41Z")
> [@Chimera](#): > > He’s going senile. So, a crime fighting duo with John McCain? ---
**Author:** ![kidchameleon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/898d66/32.png) [@kidchameleon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kidchameleon)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2010, 10:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-chuck-norris-be-anymore-of-a-dumb-ass/524707/17 "2010-01-12T22:04:26Z")
> [@Jack\_Batty](#): > > I dont think Joe Theisman even knows how to spell GOP, let alone have an opinion on them. True, he is no Terry Bradshaw. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2010, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-chuck-norris-be-anymore-of-a-dumb-ass/524707/18 "2010-01-12T22:35:46Z")
> [@](#): > > Now Norris, famed for his expertise in the martial arts, attacks from a different direction. In a new column on World Net Daily, the right-wing Web site, he claims that Obama signed the executive order so that he can slyly, without anyone noticing, create a “secret vault” at Interpol’s New York office to conceal important records about the war on terror from the American public. Dumbass. Everyone knows Obama’s secret vault is underneath the Lexington Hotel in Chicago. ---
**Author:** ![joebuck20](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/74df32/32.png) [@joebuck20](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joebuck20)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2010, 10:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-chuck-norris-be-anymore-of-a-dumb-ass/524707/19 "2010-01-12T22:39:56Z")
> [@BrainGlutton](#): > > Dumbass. Everyone knows Obama’s secret vault is underneath the Lexington Hotel in Chicago. I thought it was buried underneath his secret lair in Kenya. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2010, 11:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-chuck-norris-be-anymore-of-a-dumb-ass/524707/20 "2010-01-12T23:00:41Z")
> [@joebuck20](#): > > I thought it was buried underneath his secret lair in Kenya. Nope, **BG** ’s got it right. The Kenya vault is a decoy; it could have _anything_ inside. Everyone “knows” that the one in Chicago is empty. Geraldo proved it, with that clever, almost prescient, ruse back in '86. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-chuck-norris-be-anymore-of-a-dumb-ass/524707.md?page=2)