So speaking of acorns (and squirrels), why aren’t there more culinary uses for acorns? They’re produced in such enormous quantities, and humans have found tasty ways to prepare and eat other nuts, so why not this one? (Wikipedia informs me that in other cultures, the acorn is used for food, but why is the practice not more mainstream? Do they just taste bad?)
The native Americans did eat them. One of the problems is that they’re high in tannic acids and can kill you if you don’t prepare them properly. (Although… cashews are far, far more toxic until cooked, so this isn’t insurmountable). Recipes using acorns are always about using the flour or mash, since it’s necessary to grind them as part of safe preparation. I don’t know if you can safely roast a whole acorn the way you would other popular nuts.
Here’s a web page with some directions and recipes: http://www.sanaturalareas.org/acorns.html It compares acorns to chestnuts in terms of flavor and usage, and I know that chestnuts are not particularly popular outside of certain holiday songs.
All I can say is some people just don’t recognize a good joke. 
Oaks are easy to grow. Question that started the thread asked and answered. That’s why the joke came along. 
Sorry it was a joke, that why I put the -> 
I did read that squirrels help all trees because they don’t “know” where they bury their nuts and seed etc. They just bury a ton of them. A few they remember, most they don’t and those grow into things. So squirrels help trees
Acorns are perhaps the second most vile thing I’ve put in my mouth, second to cactus juice. Yeah, they say you can lick up cactus juice in the desert, but I’d have to be on the verge of death.
Enzymes most certainly can and do activate and suppress genes. For example, kinases and phosphatases (enzymes that add or remove phosphate groups to/from other molecules, respectively) are extremely common participants in gene regulation pathways. They activate and suppress other molecules that go on to bind or unbind with a specific section of DNA to regulate the gene. Also, it’s not true that genes are strictly binary or fixed over an organism’s lifespan, or even from cell to cell. Gene transcription is much more nuanced and the rate of gene expression in eukaryotes (which every known multicellular organism is) is highly variable. For example, every cell in your body contains the gene for pepsinogen, but only chief cells in your stomach lining express it. In a more long-term example, genes for lactase expression in humans are supposed to be shut off after the baby is weaned, but a mutation in most people of European ancestry causes the gene to be expressed throughout the human’s lifetime.
Also, DNA isn’t made from protein. DNA is composed of nucleotide bases. It is a different kind of molecule than proteins, which are composed of amino acids.
While the activation of acorns by squirrel saliva isn’t true, there’s no reason such a scheme is impossible to evolve. Many kinds of molecules affect gene expression, not just ones classified as hormones or neurotransmitters. There are seeds that don’t germinate until they are passed through an animal’s digestive system.
Is that an acorn in your pocket, or…nevermind.
Ya gotta think ahead, like ol’ Cuthbert. I have an 18-inch tall white oak sapling in my back yard. Some day (in fall) it will look like this.
Of course, since they’re slow growing I’ll be long dead by then.
Regarding edibility:
They type of acorn matters. North American oaks may be roughly divided into two general categories, the red oak group and the white oak group, both also the common name of a particular species in the general group. The red oaks are usually so loaded with tannin as to taste terrible, the white oaks usually aren’t. From the Golden field guide to Trees of North America:
I’ve eaten acorns that somebody regularly took from the tree in their yard, and was surprised to find them quite tasty. Actually as good as the nuts they were being served alongside. I have no idea what kind of oak it was - it was undoubtedly a landscape tree, and not a species native to the area.
Recently, I heard someone quote a poet, who said, “At the end of the world, I would plant a tree.”
I don’t remember the poet’s name, and I probably bungled the quote.
“Mighty aches from little toe corns grow.”
In an episode of the awesome David Attenborough’s awesome Life of Mammals, he talks about squirrels collecting the various kinds of acorns. Acorns from one variety of tree (I think probably the white oaks) tend to be eaten right away because they germinate quickly and will consume their food supply if left uneaten, while acorns from the other variety are stored because they germinate slowly. (I’d imagine the tannins also act as a preservative, if indeed I’m correct in my recollection that it’s the red oak acorns that are stored.) But in years where the white oaks produce bumper crops of acorns and the red oaks are deficient, the squirrels collect white oak acorns and carefully chisel through the outer shell and bite out the embryo, preventing germination. Pretty smart animals, squirrels.
I grew up in what was, before development, a massive oak forrest. To avoid having saplings upon saplings every year, my parents would give us kids ice cream pails and pay us a buck a pail to pick up acorns. I spent many a fall afternoon huting for acorns. My parents would refer to us kids as their “favorite squirrels” … I would hope so, since my dad would always aim to hit the squirrels crossing the road.
It’s obvious to me this guy has no idea what he’s talking about. Only squirrel enzymes can perform gene regulation on oaks, everyone knows that.
I don’t know…have you ever eaten an olive fresh off the tree?
Zombie acorn pie?
I don’t know what this question has to do with anything, but yes, I have - it was bloody horrible. Olives are only edible after they have been brined.
However, acorns from some (but by no means all) species of oak are edible to humans without any significant processing - as a matter of fact, I ate some yesterday.
http://www.atomicshrimp.com/st/content/acorns
Well, you’ll eat anything.
Martin Luther, not usually known as a poet: “Und wenn ich wüsste, dass morgen die Welt unterginge, so pflanzte ich heute noch einen Apfelbaum.” There seem to be other variants of the quote, but the gist is the same: “If I knew the world should go under tomorrow, I would still plant an apple tree today.”
Yeah, thats right
Yeh my memory is getting better. I knew this was a zombie.