# Can we just dump "zombie calling" altogether?

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-we-just-dump-zombie-calling-altogether/812293>\
**Category:** About This Message Board\
**Created:** [April 12, 2018, 2:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-we-just-dump-zombie-calling-altogether/812293 "2018-04-12T14:57:33Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 9

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**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\
**Post date:** [April 27, 2018, 6:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-we-just-dump-zombie-calling-altogether/812293/161 "2018-04-27T06:17:36Z")

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> [@Krav\_Manga](#):
>
> Has your attitude towards new posters improved in the last four years?

I’m not the topic of this thread. Nice try, though.

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**Author:** ![Krav\_Manga](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/krav_manga/32/3153_2.png) [@Krav\_Manga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Krav_Manga)\
**Post date:** [April 27, 2018, 6:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-we-just-dump-zombie-calling-altogether/812293/162 "2018-04-27T06:27:33Z")

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> [@Czarcasm](#):
>
> I’m not the topic of this thread. Nice try, though.

Didn’t you start this thread?

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**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\
**Post date:** [April 27, 2018, 6:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-we-just-dump-zombie-calling-altogether/812293/163 "2018-04-27T06:33:29Z")

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> [@Omar\_Little](#):
>
> Is there any evidence that supports that there are newbies that get insulted by zombie references and never come back? Or are these just conjectures that some assume?
> 
> There are numerous examples of newbies registering here, starting new threads, and never returning, without an utterance of a zombie reference anywhere. I could dig up hundreds of links to provide evidence of my point.

That stat is useless unless it is compared to the number of newbies that never returned after the response they got was “Zombie!!” and/or “brainz!”.

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**Author:** ![Johnny\_Bravo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_bravo/32/493_2.png) [@Johnny\_Bravo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Bravo)\
**Post date:** [April 27, 2018, 12:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-we-just-dump-zombie-calling-altogether/812293/164 "2018-04-27T12:08:55Z")

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> [@Czarcasm](#):
>
> That stat is useless unless it is compared to the number of newbies that never returned after the response they got was “Zombie!!” and/or “brainz!”.

I’ve already provided examples of newbies bumping old threads and never returning regardless of the response they get, which suggests the **default** outcome of one of those posts is a failure to to return.

So you would need to show that newbies who get a BRAAINNS response fail to become long-term posters at greater rates than newbies who do not, and that number is already pretty high. Maybe even approaching 100%. It’s obviously difficult to get good evidence with the tools we have, which is why I used famously bumped threads. But the burden of proof isn’t really on me, either.

If you can show, with numbers, that zombie jokes are driving newbies away I promise never to make one again. Not even zombie-related puns.

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**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\
**Post date:** [April 27, 2018, 12:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-we-just-dump-zombie-calling-altogether/812293/165 "2018-04-27T12:22:49Z")

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> [@Johnny\_Bravo](#):
>
> I’ve already provided examples of newbies bumping old threads and never returning regardless of the response they get, which suggests the **default** outcome of one of those posts is a failure to to return.
> 
> So you would need to show that newbies who get a BRAAINNS response fail to become long-term posters at greater rates than newbies who do not, and that number is already pretty high. Maybe even approaching 100%. It’s obviously difficult to get good evidence with the tools we have, which is why I used famously bumped threads. But the burden of proof isn’t really on me, either.
> 
> If you can show, with numbers, that zombie jokes are driving newbies away I promise never to make one again. Not even zombie-related puns.

The problem is that your stats mean absolutely nothing because such a counting _can’t_ be done unless we had some way to poll people as to why they left. It is my _opinion_ that if someone goes through the trouble of registering with this board to ask a question or state an opinion and the response they get for their troubles is “Brainz!”, “Zombieee!” or the like(sometimes from multiple posters), then they might take the path of least resistance and just go elsewhere.

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**Author:** ![Johnny\_Bravo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_bravo/32/493_2.png) [@Johnny\_Bravo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Bravo)\
**Post date:** [April 27, 2018, 12:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-we-just-dump-zombie-calling-altogether/812293/166 "2018-04-27T12:55:49Z")

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> [@Czarcasm](#):
>
> It is my _opinion_ that if someone goes through the trouble of registering with this board to ask a question or state an opinion and the response they get for their troubles is “Brainz!”, “Zombieee!” or the like(sometimes from multiple posters), then they might take the path of least resistance and just go elsewhere.

Well then it is my _opinion_ that you are incorrect, which means this all goes back to you just not really being a fan of zombie jokes. A perfectly acceptable position with absolutely no need for justification. 🙂

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**Author:** ![Krav\_Manga](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/krav_manga/32/3153_2.png) [@Krav\_Manga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Krav_Manga)\
**Post date:** [April 27, 2018, 12:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-we-just-dump-zombie-calling-altogether/812293/167 "2018-04-27T12:58:52Z")

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> [@Czarcasm](#):
>
> The problem is that your stats mean absolutely nothing because such a counting _can’t_ be done unless we had some way to poll people as to why they left. It is my _opinion_ that if someone goes through the trouble of registering with this board to ask a question or state an opinion and the response they get for their troubles is “Brainz!”, “Zombieee!” or the like(sometimes from multiple posters), then they might take the path of least resistance and just go elsewhere.

In your _opinion_, are new posters more likely to be driven off by a silly joke or aggressive and rude ‘socratic’ examination by long term posters?

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\
**Post date:** [April 27, 2018, 1:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-we-just-dump-zombie-calling-altogether/812293/168 "2018-04-27T13:10:46Z")

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> [@Johnny\_Bravo](#):
>
> Well then it is my _opinion_ that you are incorrect, which means this all goes back to you just not really being a fan of zombie jokes. A perfectly acceptable position with absolutely no need for justification. 🙂

My position is what I said it was in my previous post, for the reason stated in my previous post, your interpretation notwithstanding.

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**Author:** ![Johnny\_Bravo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_bravo/32/493_2.png) [@Johnny\_Bravo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Bravo)\
**Post date:** [April 27, 2018, 1:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-we-just-dump-zombie-calling-altogether/812293/169 "2018-04-27T13:39:14Z")

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My point is that board health is a very serious issue, and if it’s being impacted by zombie jokes then that’s problematic and I would agree that a change is necessary.

But the only evidence that I’ve been able to find suggests (note I do not say _proves_) that newbies who bump threads are disinclined to stick around regardless of how they’re treated. If that data is worthless, then at present we have nothing to go on except feelings, and I do not believe that is enough of a reason to implement a concrete rule.

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**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\
**Post date:** [April 27, 2018, 2:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-we-just-dump-zombie-calling-altogether/812293/170 "2018-04-27T14:01:47Z")

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I’m a relatively new poster. I did not come here via a google search, so I’d been around for a little bit before I saw my first zombie joke.

I found it off-putting and had no idea what it was about. I would have greatly preferred if the poster had mentioned explicitly that the thread was old. If they’d done that, too, I wouldn’t have minded the zombie joke, it just felt weird and out-of-place and yes, rude.

> [@Crazyhorse](#):
>
> …Nobody should give a bumped thread a second thought including moderators. It shouldn’t be considered noteworthy in any sense if someone bumps and old thread. It most definitely shouldn’t have a section of its own in the board rules. That comes from a time when there were a lot more posters and a lot more interest in message boards. Today the bulk of our interesting threads have already been written. Adding to them, even years later, should be considered not only permissible but beneficial to the boards…

I can’t tell you how much I approve of this post. I ran into several interesting (to me) threads that were shut down just because they were old. As best as I could tell, the topic was still interesting. I still think that is a frustrating “feature” of this board.

> [@Bone](#):
>
> We want to be as welcoming to new posters as possible. Having someone come as a result of a google search only to find the topic locked is not as welcoming as possible. If there is a way the discussion can continue, that’s fine. If the circumstances dictate otherwise, participants no longer active, underlying information no longer operative, etc., then a polite note can be given with an invitation to start a new thread if people so desire.

Why is it better to start a new thread and make people bounce back and forth? Serious question. If there’s stuff to say, why not say it in the same thread?

> [@Grrr](#):
>
> “Zombie” is hardly a localized joke though. Anybody who’s been in a MB is going to get the reference.

I’ve been on several other message boards since the late 1990s. This is the only place I’ve seen it.

I like to know that a thread is old as much as anyone. But it’s MUCH more helpful to say “the OP was written in 2005, he’s unlikely to see your reply” than to say “Braaaiiins!”

Maybe if I liked the idea of closing/abandoning old threads I’d find the whole zombie thing funnier.

Anyway, I’m not asking for a new rule, but I am suggesting that people who want to be inviting/friendly/helpful should try posting something factual (“this thread is old”) rather than either reporting it to the mods or making zombie jokes.

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\
**Post date:** [April 27, 2018, 2:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-we-just-dump-zombie-calling-altogether/812293/171 "2018-04-27T14:02:48Z")

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huh, no idea I joined that long ago. I didn’t start posting at all regularly until more recently.

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**Author:** ![Morgenstern](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Morgenstern](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgenstern)\
**Post date:** [April 27, 2018, 2:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-we-just-dump-zombie-calling-altogether/812293/172 "2018-04-27T14:15:15Z")

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> [@Czarcasm](#):
>
> That stat is useless unless it is compared to the number of newbies that never returned after the response they got was “Zombie!!” and/or “brainz!”.

I agree with your underlying premise. I see what you are doing as a good Christian effort to make the board a better place for everyone. A place of sunshine and boobies for noobies.

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**Author:** ![Johnny\_Bravo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_bravo/32/493_2.png) [@Johnny\_Bravo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Bravo)\
**Post date:** [April 27, 2018, 2:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-we-just-dump-zombie-calling-altogether/812293/173 "2018-04-27T14:16:53Z")

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> [@puzzlegal](#):
>
> I’ve been on several other message boards since the late 1990s. This is the only place I’ve seen it.

Go do a Google image search for ‘zombie thread.’

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**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\
**Post date:** [April 27, 2018, 2:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-we-just-dump-zombie-calling-altogether/812293/174 "2018-04-27T14:26:58Z")

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> [@Johnny\_Bravo](#):
>
> Go do a Google image search for ‘zombie thread.’

I don’t doubt that it’s used in other places. I am giving you anecdotal evidence that someone can actively post of multiple bulletin boards and not be familiar with that term. And then I’m sure there are actually new posters from time to time, not just people who have been posting other places.

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\
**Post date:** [April 27, 2018, 2:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-we-just-dump-zombie-calling-altogether/812293/175 "2018-04-27T14:27:09Z")

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> [@Morgenstern](#):
>
> I agree with your underlying premise. I see what you are doing as a good Christian effort to make the board a better place for everyone. A place of sunshine and boobies for noobies.

Sunshine and boobies for _everyone_, 'cause [boobies are cute.](https://www.google.com/search?q=boobie+birds&rlz=1C1OKWM_enUS773US773&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwi8goGl1NraAhUF0oMKHei9DokQ_AUICigB&biw=1680&bih=929#imgrc=J6VZQ2iYclBlLM:)

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\
**Post date:** [April 27, 2018, 2:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-we-just-dump-zombie-calling-altogether/812293/176 "2018-04-27T14:29:12Z")

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lol, I just googled exactly that, and I didn’t get any references to message boards in the first page, just references to computer science

> [@stackoverflow](#):
>
> A zombie thread is a joinable thread which has terminated, but which hasn’t been joined. Normally, either a thread should be joined at some time, or it should be detached. Otherwise, the OS maintains its state for some possible future join, which takes resources.

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Johnny\_Bravo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_bravo/32/493_2.png) [@Johnny\_Bravo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Bravo)\
**Post date:** [April 27, 2018, 2:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-we-just-dump-zombie-calling-altogether/812293/177 "2018-04-27T14:34:14Z")

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> [@puzzlegal](#):
>
> lol, I just googled exactly that, and I didn’t get any references to message boards in the first page, just references to computer science

That’s why I specified image search, since it’s also a common and specific CS phrase.

The image search will give you lots of zombie thread memes, which are evidence that the phrase is common on boards which are not the SDMB (where we do not have image memes).

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\
**Post date:** [April 27, 2018, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-we-just-dump-zombie-calling-altogether/812293/178 "2018-04-27T14:53:14Z")

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I also googled zombie thread meme, and found a lot of people speculating when the meme originated. They mostly guessed very recently.

Again, I can’t imagine it’s unique to this board, but i know from personal experience that it’s not ubiquitous.

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Johnny\_Bravo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_bravo/32/493_2.png) [@Johnny\_Bravo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Bravo)\
**Post date:** [April 27, 2018, 3:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-we-just-dump-zombie-calling-altogether/812293/179 "2018-04-27T15:05:49Z")

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I’m not necessarily arguing that it is, though as usual [there’s an XKCD for that.](https://xkcd.com/1053/)

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\
**Post date:** [April 27, 2018, 3:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-we-just-dump-zombie-calling-altogether/812293/180 "2018-04-27T15:39:12Z")

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Except coke and mentos are awesome, whereas zombie jokes aren’t very funny even if you are familiar with them. 😉

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