# Can you ever go home again? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 3, 2018, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-ever-go-home-again/825525 "2018-12-03T20:23:06Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![eenerms](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/cdc98d/32.png) [@eenerms](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eenerms)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2018, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-ever-go-home-again/825525/1 "2018-12-03T20:23:06Z")
Over the weekend my husband and I decided to move back to Wisconsin, Madison area. We left there in 1993. Lived in Saudi Arabia, Indiana, Arizona, Qatar, Italy and Australia before moving to our house in 2012. He’ll be retiring, he says, in 2020, we’ll sell our house here and move back to be with family. I’m sort of mixed with it. I loved Madison when I lived there, but it’s changed so much. We will make it work, I’m sure.🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Slash1972](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slash1972/32/6461_2.png) [@Slash1972](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slash1972)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2018, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-ever-go-home-again/825525/2 "2018-12-03T20:24:24Z")
I would live in a tent on the street before I would move back to my craphole hometown. ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2018, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-ever-go-home-again/825525/3 "2018-12-03T20:32:02Z")
I go back home about 2-3 times a week during the ski season. ---
**Author:** ![snoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/43a26b/32.png) [@snoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/snoe)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2018, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-ever-go-home-again/825525/4 "2018-12-03T20:32:05Z")
> [@](#): > > I loved Madison when I lived there, but it’s changed so much. And so have you! “You can’t go home again” is a double-edged sword. 🙂 Origin of the phrase: [You Can't Go Home Again - Wikipedia](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/You_Can%27t_Go_Home_Again#Title) A related metaphysical issue: [Ship of Theseus - Wikipedia](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ship_of_Theseus) ---
**Author:** ![aceplace57](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aceplace57/32/3500_2.png) [@aceplace57](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aceplace57)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2018, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-ever-go-home-again/825525/5 "2018-12-03T20:39:57Z")
Do you want to deal with heavy snow in your retirement years? Wisconsin is very far north. I miss my hometown. It’s gone through tough economic times since I left in 1978. Population dropped from 26,000 to 19,000. There’s not much opportunities and people leave after graduating. It’s not the same town that I loved. All the mom & pop restaurants that I frequented closed long ago. The people that ran them long retired. My old high school is a middle school now. They built a new high school. I can’t see myself going back there. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2018, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-ever-go-home-again/825525/6 "2018-12-03T20:45:03Z")
I left Alaska in 1967 when I joined the military. Other than infrequent visits, I didn’t move back until 1998. It was fine, but not where I wanted to retire, as the winters are just too damned long. We departed in 2009. ---
**Author:** ![Doctor\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctor_jackson/32/32_2.png) [@Doctor\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2018, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-ever-go-home-again/825525/7 "2018-12-03T21:17:18Z")
Go home again? Hell, I can’t seem to leave home! I have lived in 4 different houses since I was about 6 months old, all within a 10 miles radius. Getting ready to move to #5, where I plan on staying until retirement. This one expanded the radius to 13 miles. ---
**Author:** ![eenerms](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/cdc98d/32.png) [@eenerms](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eenerms)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2018, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-ever-go-home-again/825525/8 "2018-12-03T21:52:33Z")
> [@aceplace57](#): > > Do you want to deal with heavy snow in your retirement years? Wisconsin is very far north. > > I miss my hometown. It’s gone through tough economic times since I left in 1978. Population dropped from 26,000 to 19,000. There’s not much opportunities and people leave after graduating. > > It’s not the same town that I loved. All the mom & pop restaurants that I frequented closed long ago. The people that ran them long retired. My old high school is a middle school now. They built a new high school. > > I can’t see myself going back there. We live in northern Nevada. In the mountains. We have snow.🙂 ---
**Author:** ![What\_Exit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/what_exit/32/10652_2.png) [@What\_Exit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/What_Exit)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2018, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-ever-go-home-again/825525/9 "2018-12-03T22:01:20Z")
I live less than 4 miles from where I grew up. 17 years here and 15 there+ 4 in the Navy so most of my stuff spent 19 years in that house. I’ve lived elsewhere of course. But I currently use the same barbershop I did as a kid and know the area well and still have some friends from school. Now I won’t be here much longer, not sure yet where next is and retirement will see us somewhere much further south. ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2018, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-ever-go-home-again/825525/10 "2018-12-03T22:12:36Z")
> [@eenerms](#): > > We live in northern Nevada. In the mountains. We have snow.🙂 Your location says, _“Nowhere Special”_. I would disagree. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2018, 10:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-ever-go-home-again/825525/11 "2018-12-03T22:34:22Z")
I left home in 1963, and returned (with husband-to-be) from NYC in 1995, to take care of my elderly parents. Now, it’s just my husband and I in this old house. If I were still single, I’d HATE it here. ---
**Author:** ![Nawth\_Chucka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/c57346/32.png) [@Nawth\_Chucka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nawth_Chucka)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2018, 10:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-ever-go-home-again/825525/12 "2018-12-03T22:38:53Z")
> [@eenerms](#): > > We live in northern Nevada. In the mountains. We have snow.🙂 Ah, but you also have pot available to you. _waves from 4 hours east of you_ ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2018, 10:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-ever-go-home-again/825525/13 "2018-12-03T22:58:11Z")
I grew up here and there as the result of Daddy’s military service. I feel like home is where I happen to sleep tonight. So I don’t really get it. I did tell my kids, as each one prepared to leave after HS graduation, not to believe it, “You can ‘always’ come home to me”. So far they’ve never taken my offer.☹ ---
**Author:** ![TokyoBayer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tokyobayer/32/13989_2.png) [@TokyoBayer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TokyoBayer)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2018, 12:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-ever-go-home-again/825525/14 "2018-12-04T00:32:25Z")
Probably not. We’ll probably live here in Taiwan. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2018, 12:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-ever-go-home-again/825525/15 "2018-12-04T12:58:15Z")
> [@Slash1972](#): > > I would live in a tent on the street before I would move back to my craphole hometown. What if they had a parade, complete with marching band? ---
**Author:** ![Athena](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/35a633/32.png) [@Athena](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Athena)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2018, 1:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-ever-go-home-again/825525/16 "2018-12-04T13:38:33Z")
I left my home town when I was 17, returned when I was 32, been here ever since (I’m in my late 40s now). My hometown makes Madison look 1) tropical and 2) huge (we are much smaller, and get tons more snow). I’ve never regretted it. Mr. Athena and I both work from home, and we occasionally talk about moving, but the conversation always ends up as “where would we go that’s better than here?” and neither of us having an answer. So yeah, you can go home again. It’s not the same as when I was a little kid, but it’s still “home”. ---
**Author:** ![senoy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dbc845/32.png) [@senoy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/senoy)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2018, 1:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-ever-go-home-again/825525/17 "2018-12-04T13:50:01Z")
I’m from a town of 300, I’m back there at least once a month. More during the ski season and smallmouth fishing season. Things change, but not by as much as you’d think. I guess if I came back after 30 years rather than see it often things might be more jarring. Mostly though, it’s similar people doing similar things. ---
**Author:** ![Icarus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/icarus/32/72_2.png) [@Icarus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Icarus)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2018, 1:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-ever-go-home-again/825525/18 "2018-12-04T13:57:02Z")
The answer really depends on where home is, and what is there. Madison Wisconsin? It’s a great city and has a lot to offer even if it’s not where you began. Big college town, great restaurants, decent airport, hospitals, massive political unrest, what’s not to like? If you have family still there, and know other people there, all the better. Makes it easier to slide into a social life. Whereas for me, the very small town I grew up in? There are no relatives there still (all deceased). Sure, I could buy a house for pocket change, but not much going on otherwise. So, I would find it difficult to return. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2018, 2:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-ever-go-home-again/825525/19 "2018-12-04T14:07:03Z")
> [@Icarus](#): > > The answer really depends on where home is, and what is there. And on how you define “home”. To me home is those places where it’s fine to be who and as you are. In my case that includes the place where I was born, it includes places I only reached as an adult, and doesn’t include the place where I grew up. The tiny town in which I have my house (I don’t say “live” because I live on the road) is home despite not having a single relative there and having gotten there in my 40s. My neighbors and I get and generally accept each other. That’s what home is, to me. To other people the concept means different things, and therefore whether they can go home or not will also vary. ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2018, 2:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-ever-go-home-again/825525/20 "2018-12-04T14:28:54Z")
I visit the “old family farmstead” quite a bit and while its not the same it is so close that it feels like 10 hours ago that I left and not 50+ years. The “big city” nearby (Edwardsville PA) is more of a culture shock. 90% of my memories are gone and the newer places and things don’t hold much attraction to me. I would go back to live but more for the extended region than the “home”. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-ever-go-home-again/825525.md?page=2)