# Can you have sex and not tell anyone about it? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [January 19, 2005, 7:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-have-sex-and-not-tell-anyone-about-it/285510 "2005-01-19T07:10:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Amp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Amp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amp)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-have-sex-and-not-tell-anyone-about-it/285510/21 "2005-01-19T15:35:32Z")
Nope, I don’t go around bragging about my [conquests](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=292263). ---
**Author:** ![Othersider](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/cab0a1/32.png) [@Othersider](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Othersider)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 3:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-have-sex-and-not-tell-anyone-about-it/285510/22 "2005-01-19T15:45:01Z")
I don’t generally make a habit of mentioning sex to anyone. If it comes up in the conversation, I may talk about it a little, but that’s it. Even when I first started, I never felt compelled to tell everyone. ---
**Author:** ![Gfactor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/9de053/32.png) [@Gfactor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gfactor)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-have-sex-and-not-tell-anyone-about-it/285510/23 "2005-01-19T15:49:13Z")
> [@squeegee](#): > > **Can you have sex and not tell anyone about it?** > > Yes, and so should you. Especially if you are having sex with **squeegee**. 😉 Feel free to tell anyone if you’ve had sex with me. Especially if your review is positive. Seriously, I have definitely kissed, told, and lived to regret it. I try not to now. At least I don’t name names. ---
**Author:** ![My\_Darn\_Snake\_Legs](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f14d63/32.png) [@My\_Darn\_Snake\_Legs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/My_Darn_Snake_Legs)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-have-sex-and-not-tell-anyone-about-it/285510/24 "2005-01-19T16:19:39Z")
I don’t know that I have kissed and told with a bad consequence, but I do know that one girl told _everyone that we hooked up._ Saddly, we didn’t do as much as she said we did. The reports were all positive so I guess I don’t really have a problem with it though. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![GingerOfTheNorth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/cdc98d/32.png) [@GingerOfTheNorth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GingerOfTheNorth)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-have-sex-and-not-tell-anyone-about-it/285510/25 "2005-01-19T16:57:50Z")
> [@Mangetout](#): > > Ewwww! You’ll be telling us you don’t turn the lights off next! [sub](Well, technically, you _won’t_ be telling us, but you get the general idea)[/sub] I have two children. They didn’t spring fully formed from my forehead, so they must have gotten here some other way. I’m just saying, my sex life is not for public airing. ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 5:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-have-sex-and-not-tell-anyone-about-it/285510/26 "2005-01-19T17:07:35Z")
Yes. ---
**Author:** ![ioioio](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ioioio/32/316_2.png) [@ioioio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ioioio)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-have-sex-and-not-tell-anyone-about-it/285510/27 "2005-01-19T17:21:07Z")
If you tell people every time you have sex, then when you don’t say anthing, they have to assume you’re not getting any. I prefer to remain silent and let everyone think I’m going at it so hot and heavy all the time that I’m too exhausted to talk about it. ---
**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-have-sex-and-not-tell-anyone-about-it/285510/28 "2005-01-19T17:30:02Z")
My close friends know immediately if I had sex, just by looking at me. If I’m in a relationship (which is almost-never), I don’t bother discussing the frequency of my sex life, because I should be getting it regularly. Of course, my friends and I are the type that discuss things in vivid detail, when deemed necessary. I don’t run around telling co-workers that I got laid, I’m not going to call my grandma and let her in on the news, but when my best friend asks me what I did last night, you can be _damn_ sure I’m going to tell her. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Incubus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/c68b51/32.png) [@Incubus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Incubus)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-have-sex-and-not-tell-anyone-about-it/285510/29 "2005-01-19T17:33:37Z")
I have a best friend whom I confide in, and he’s probably the only one I’d share that kind of information with (and vice-versa). But other than that, it is far more gratifying for me to keep that kind of stuff to myself; often people don’t think I’ll have a snowball’s chance in hell with a particular woman; its satisfying enough to know how things are _really_ going. ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-have-sex-and-not-tell-anyone-about-it/285510/30 "2005-01-19T17:47:26Z")
> [@Stonebow](#): > > …I still tell everyone about just virtually every time I have an encounter with my lady. So do I! I’m surprised it hasn’t gotten back to you! 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Stonebow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ed8c4c/32.png) [@Stonebow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stonebow)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-have-sex-and-not-tell-anyone-about-it/285510/31 "2005-01-19T19:55:56Z")
> [@gatopescado](#): > > So do I! I’m surprised it hasn’t gotten back to you! 😉 Dude. That was…Dude. _shakes head_ ---
**Author:** ![Gfactor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/9de053/32.png) [@Gfactor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gfactor)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-have-sex-and-not-tell-anyone-about-it/285510/32 "2005-01-19T20:06:36Z")
> [@gatopescado](#): > > So do I! I’m surprised it hasn’t gotten back to you! 😉 :smack: Wish I’d thought of that. . . 😃 ---
**Author:** ![taxi78cab](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e47c2d/32.png) [@taxi78cab](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/taxi78cab)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-have-sex-and-not-tell-anyone-about-it/285510/33 "2005-01-19T20:06:37Z")
I’m not terribly good at keeping it a secret… I mean I don’t tell coworkers and I certainly don’t tell family, but most of my close friends know when something happens. What’s the point if you can’t brag? 😛 ---
**Author:** ![eman77](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f04885/32.png) [@eman77](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eman77)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 10:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-have-sex-and-not-tell-anyone-about-it/285510/34 "2005-01-19T22:25:39Z")
In high school I had a rather close group of 6 friends, never mind that those guys were all backstabbing cockblockers. Whenever one of us got laid (seldom) everyone and their uncle would know about it and the details. They all thought I lost my virginity at 17 and bugged me till the end of junior year because they thought I was the last one to lose my virginity. The truth? I lost it in 8th grade before any of them and had sex around 30 times with 2 different girls till then. Never told them since, even if I did they wouldn’t believe me. I always considered not telling anyone about that stuff as the next step to being a “player” and it really put my self-esteem and confidence at a different level. Nowadays? I might tell my best friend casually, no big deal. If it comes up as a topic I always have the best stories. I recommend it. ---
**Author:** ![iamthewalrus\_3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/258eb7/32.png) [@iamthewalrus\_3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iamthewalrus_3)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 10:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-have-sex-and-not-tell-anyone-about-it/285510/35 "2005-01-19T22:29:28Z")
My lips are always sealed. Although, if it’s clean, I will wear my “I got laid last night” T-shirt. > [@](#): > > I told my best friend when I got laid for the first time (old high school vow). I have an old friend from high school who, from time to time, would check in on our respective virginities. For some reason, he stopped asking me after I started dating his sister. ---
**Author:** ![ccwaterback](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/df705f/32.png) [@ccwaterback](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ccwaterback)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 10:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-have-sex-and-not-tell-anyone-about-it/285510/36 "2005-01-19T22:38:15Z")
> [@iamthewalrus(:3=](#): > > I have an old friend from high school who, from time to time, would check in on our respective virginities. For some reason, he stopped asking me after I started dating his sister. HA, good one. In high school I learned to stop telling my buds about getting laid because they would follow the poor girl around for weeks. And of course, they would inform her how I bragged about it too. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 11:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-have-sex-and-not-tell-anyone-about-it/285510/37 "2005-01-19T23:35:57Z")
> [@ccwaterback](#): > > Can you have sex and not tell anyone about it? Of course, darling. Now shut up and assume the position. ---
**Author:** ![duffer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/duffer/32/1026_2.png) [@duffer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/duffer)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2005, 12:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-have-sex-and-not-tell-anyone-about-it/285510/38 "2005-01-20T00:28:54Z")
> [@iamthewalrus(:3=](#): > > My lips are always sealed. That just means you’re not doing it right. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2005, 12:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-have-sex-and-not-tell-anyone-about-it/285510/39 "2005-01-20T00:35:51Z")
Is nothing private any more? Well, yes, my personal life is. Some things are nobody else’s business. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2005, 12:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-have-sex-and-not-tell-anyone-about-it/285510/40 "2005-01-20T00:39:38Z")
> [@FairyChatMom](#): > > Is nothing private any more? Well, yes, my personal life is. Some things are nobody else’s business. FairyChatMom!!! I haven’t seen you around in a while. Maybe we’re just not frequenting the same threads. Anyway, it’s SO good to see you! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-have-sex-and-not-tell-anyone-about-it/285510.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-have-sex-and-not-tell-anyone-about-it/285510.md?page=3)