# Can you help me be a sex goddess? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [November 28, 2000, 4:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-help-me-be-a-sex-goddess/42982 "2000-11-28T04:22:22Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 16\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![handy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b5a626/32.png) [@handy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/handy)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2000, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-help-me-be-a-sex-goddess/42982/41 "2000-11-29T17:57:13Z")
I used to practice on myself. You guys should learn how to give yourself a BJ too. Think just how convienent it would be. ---
**Author:** ![Gozu\_Tashoya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/7993a0/32.png) [@Gozu\_Tashoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gozu_Tashoya)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2000, 10:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-help-me-be-a-sex-goddess/42982/42 "2000-11-29T22:52:59Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Omniscient \* > [BBTW, I think its high time we got some detail out of the ladies. What gets you off? Sadly, I think this is going to be fruitless since every womans preference varies so widely. You girls can’t even agree on internal versus external, or both. I usually need to reserve about 2 weeks in the beginning of every relationship to relearn how _this_ one likes it. I can’t say i mind the learing at all, just as long as she’s eager to coopoerate. \*\* I think it’s safe to say that they all like ‘intact’ men with prehensile foreskins. 😛 [sub]I’m sorry, I’m sorry. But someone was going to make a JDT reference _sooner_ or later…[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![malkavia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/malkavia/32/5621_2.png) [@malkavia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/malkavia)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2000, 11:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-help-me-be-a-sex-goddess/42982/43 "2000-11-29T23:47:22Z")
If I were building the perfect man, he’d be intact. Much like if a guy were building the perfect woman, she might be completely shaven 'cept for a small triangle patch in the front… but if you met the girl of your dreams and she didnt shave, you’d probably not think twice about it. =) ---
**Author:** ![evilbeth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/evilbeth/32/2268_2.png) [@evilbeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/evilbeth)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2000, 7:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-help-me-be-a-sex-goddess/42982/44 "2000-11-30T07:37:55Z")
**Omni** , you are correct–the answers about what turns women on are extremely varied. I can only speak for myself so here goes: I prefer a guy who: [ul] [li]knows how to use his tongue. Everywhere. Tongues are very versatile. They can lick gently, probe, massage, caress, explore, you name it.[/li] [li]does not focus solely on the clitoris when perfoming oral sex. That gets irritating very quickly.[/li] [li]pays attention to all nether areas. The buttocks and related areas can be very erogenous–capitalize on that. He also has to be secure enough in his own sexuality to allow me to do the same to him.[/li] [li]does not keep asking, “Is that good?” If it isn’t, I’ll tell you.[/li] [li]has a larger than average member. This is personal preference. Many women will tell you that for them it doesn’t matter what kind of equipment a man carries so long as he knows how to use it. While this is mostly true, it also holds true that if you just bring top quality equipment, I can either help you learn to use it ir just use it myself and you can watch.[/li] [li]is freshly showered. Clean is the best smell. It lets the natural aromas come through without reminding me of a _National Geographic_ feature.[/li] [li]can be flexible in the kinds of sex he enjoys. I want a man who can make sweet, romantic love to me first thing in the morning and then turn around and blow my mind with freaky, handcuffs/whips/candle wax/dildoes/blindfolded hardcore sex later that night.[/li] [li]is willing to sleep in the wet spot(s). I hate doing that![/li][/ul] There’s my list. Idealistic? Yes. But you asked! ---
**Author:** ![Omniscient](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/omniscient/32/3290_2.png) [@Omniscient](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omniscient)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2000, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-help-me-be-a-sex-goddess/42982/45 "2000-11-30T15:48:46Z")
beth, sounds like a good deal to me! So do you think you’ll be able to attend the next ChiDope? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![labdude](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/5fc32e/32.png) [@labdude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/labdude)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2000, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-help-me-be-a-sex-goddess/42982/46 "2000-11-30T19:20:45Z")
[QUOTE] \*Originally posted by evilbeth \* \*\* > [@](#): > > Odd as it may seem, I am very flattered by this statement. Thank you. You know, everyone has at least one talent–some are more marketable than others but everyone’s got one- \*\* I can’t think of a more marketable talent than this!!! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![malkavia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/malkavia/32/5621_2.png) [@malkavia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/malkavia)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2000, 10:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-help-me-be-a-sex-goddess/42982/47 "2000-11-30T22:19:46Z")
I think **EvilBeth** hit the nail right on the head with her list. I, in addition: \_love eye contact. I understand that sometimes this is impossible, but whenever the opportunity arises, I want that connection. \_want a reaction. Some men are just naturally quiet. This grates on me. Some women are okay with it, Im not. \_want to be touched. Touch is -so- important. This makes hands incredibly important to me. A guy with a cute ass has nothing on a guy with great hands. \_need a guy to understand that the sexual experience does NOT stop just because he’s spent. Guys who immediately looks for something else to do when they’re “done” piss me off. Lay next to me, damnit. Basque. Touch some more. Offer me a cigarette and lay next to me while we smoke or something… but dont get up and go make a sandwich. \_understand that the entire body should come into love making… Theres no part of my body that doesnt want to be touched in that situation. Its important to take advantage of the wonders of skin and pleasant nerve endings. \_would like to reitterate: Do -NOT- ask every 3 seconds if we like something. This is what gauging reactions is all about… If you were actually paying attention to us, you’d KNOW if we liked it or not. \_I personally like to hear my name occasionally… It runs a few extra shivers up my spine and is a nice touch. Uhmmm… yeah. thats all I can think of right now. ---
**Author:** ![evilbeth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/evilbeth/32/2268_2.png) [@evilbeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/evilbeth)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2000, 11:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-help-me-be-a-sex-goddess/42982/48 "2000-11-30T23:29:50Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Omniscient \* > \*\*beth, sounds like a good deal to me! So do you think you’ll be able to attend the next ChiDope? 😉 \*\* If you will be there, I’m on my way to buy a plane ticket now!! ---
**Author:** ![KellyM](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/57b2e6/32.png) [@KellyM](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KellyM)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2000, 11:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-help-me-be-a-sex-goddess/42982/49 "2000-11-30T23:59:59Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Uniball \* > \*\*I know, for a fact, that tranvestites are better blowjobbers than women. \*\* Have you published? I’d be very curious to see the nature of your research in this regard. Were nontransvestite men included in the sample? ---
**Author:** ![Omniscient](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/omniscient/32/3290_2.png) [@Omniscient](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omniscient)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2000, 3:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-help-me-be-a-sex-goddess/42982/50 "2000-12-01T15:39:26Z")
> [@](#): > > If you will be there, I’m on my way to buy a plane ticket now!! WooHoo! beth, it looks like we’ll be able to preform a double blind (both of us blindfolded ;)) case study on the pros and cons of our techniques. If we document carefully (digital video) the results may very well benefit Dopers for decades to come. We can nail down precisely what it take to be a sex goddess. Whew, the things we do in the name of fighting ignorance… ---
**Author:** ![stifferd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/22d042/32.png) [@stifferd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stifferd)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2000, 11:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-help-me-be-a-sex-goddess/42982/51 "2000-12-02T11:08:42Z")
Um, okay I’ll help. E-mail me at stifferd\_3003@yahoo.ca. LOL. ---
**Author:** ![handy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b5a626/32.png) [@handy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/handy)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2000, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-help-me-be-a-sex-goddess/42982/52 "2000-12-02T15:46:03Z")
I could add this funny: "This one actually happened at Harvard University in October last year. In a biology class, the professor was discussing the high glucose levels found in semen. A young female (freshman), raised her hand and asked, “If I understand what you are saying, there is a lot of glucose in male semen, as in sugar?” “That’s correct.” responded the professor, going on to add much statistical data. Raising her hand again, the sweet young thing asked, “Then why doesn’t it taste sweet?” After a stunned silence, the whole class burst out laughing, the poor girl turned bright red and as she realised exactly what she had inadvertently said (or rather implied), she picked up her books without a word and walked out of the class, and never returned. However, as she was going out of the door, the professor’s reply was a classic. Totally straight-faced, he answered her question, “It doesn’t taste sweet because the taste-buds for sweetness are on the tip of your tongue and not in the back of your throat!” ---
**Author:** ![lno](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a8b319/32.png) [@lno](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lno)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2000, 6:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-help-me-be-a-sex-goddess/42982/53 "2000-12-03T06:09:39Z")
Eh- it’s past midnight- inhibitions left at the door and no one here knows me, anyway. (Right?) I really can’t add anything to the “plus” column that hasn’t already been said. Enthusiasm, tongue, etc. And the “minus” column is pretty much just no teeth. With that in mind, hearken near, young children, and I shall tell ye a story of a time where I almost identified with John Wayne Bobbitt. My girlfriend’s parents were visiting. We went upstairs to get something- I can’t recall what- and she spontaneously decided that that was the best time for a BJ. Thrill of being caught, I suppose. Down came the pants, and away she went, until we heard the creak of someone stepping on the stairs. Her eyes grew wide in shock, and she reflexively tried to close her mouth, forgetting that there was something already inside. Fortunately, the teeth marks left no scar, and I managed to suppress my scream. Thus, being scraped by teeth isn’t that much of a turn-on for me. It’s a reminder that things could be much, MUCH worse. ---
**Author:** ![evilbeth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/evilbeth/32/2268_2.png) [@evilbeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/evilbeth)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2000, 6:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-help-me-be-a-sex-goddess/42982/54 "2000-12-04T06:33:52Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Omniscient \* > \*\*If we document carefully (digital video) the results may very well benefit Dopers for decades to come. We can nail down precisely what it take to be a sex goddess. > \*\* All in the name of science… ---
**Author:** ![Gozu\_Tashoya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/7993a0/32.png) [@Gozu\_Tashoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gozu_Tashoya)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2000, 8:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-help-me-be-a-sex-goddess/42982/55 "2000-12-04T08:34:56Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by LNO \* > \*\*Eh- it’s past midnight- inhibitions left at the door and no one here knows me, anyway. (Right?) > > I really can’t add anything to the “plus” column that hasn’t already been said. Enthusiasm, tongue, etc. And the “minus” column is pretty much just no teeth. > > With that in mind, hearken near, young children, and I shall tell ye a story of a time where I almost identified with John Wayne Bobbitt. > > My girlfriend’s parents were visiting. We went upstairs to get something- I can’t recall what- and she spontaneously decided that that was the best time for a BJ. Thrill of being caught, I suppose. Down came the pants, and away she went, until we heard the creak of someone stepping on the stairs. > > Her eyes grew wide in shock, and she reflexively tried to close her mouth, forgetting that there was something already inside. Fortunately, the teeth marks left no scar, and I managed to suppress my scream. > > Thus, being scraped by teeth isn’t that much of a turn-on for me. It’s a reminder that things could be much, MUCH worse. > > \*\* Hey, so what happened next? ---
**Author:** ![lno](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a8b319/32.png) [@lno](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lno)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2000, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-help-me-be-a-sex-goddess/42982/56 "2000-12-04T18:35:05Z")
What happened next? I yanked my pants back up, keenly aware not to catch myself in my zipper, and prayed my face wasn’t too flushed. We both came back downstairs, and about five minutes later, I excused myself to the bathroom to make sure everything was intact. Still are, in case any cute female Dopers wanna search for bite marks… [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-help-me-be-a-sex-goddess/42982.md?page=2)