# Can you top this lame excuse? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 20, 2014, 9:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-top-this-lame-excuse/699047 "2014-09-20T21:48:31Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![weef](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/d6d6ee/32.png) [@weef](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/weef)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2014, 9:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-top-this-lame-excuse/699047/1 "2014-09-20T21:48:31Z")
My brother-in-law wasn’t answering my wife’s texts for weeks. There was nothing so important that she had to actually make a phone call but they usually check up on each other every few days via texts. Other siblings had heard from him so there was no concern (every now and then my brother-in-law goes AWOL and as long as we know he’s not lying in a ditch somewhere all is fine). After three weeks he sends out this text message: “My tex (sic) hasn’t been working for the last three weeks. I was able to receive texs (sic) but not send them. Today it’s working again”. Can you top this lame excuse? ---
**Author:** ![Sahirrnee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sahirrnee/32/13937_2.png) [@Sahirrnee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sahirrnee)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2014, 10:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-top-this-lame-excuse/699047/2 "2014-09-20T22:02:23Z")
The second year we were married my ex-husband didn’t get me a birthday present. his excuse was that he didn’t know what to get me. However the lame excuse part _I was going to get you a card on the way home (from work) but traffic was really heavy and I knew once I got off the road I would have trouble getting back out into traffic._ ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Accident](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f05b48/32.png) [@Mr.Accident](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Accident)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2014, 10:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-top-this-lame-excuse/699047/3 "2014-09-20T22:49:44Z")
Was other siblings getting texts from him? If not, it could actually be a viable excuse. My fiances phone will on occasion go over a week without being able to send texts, but can receive them. Just out of the blue it’ll start back allowing outgoing texts. ---
**Author:** ![IvoryTowerDenizen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ivorytowerdenizen/32/17937_2.png) [@IvoryTowerDenizen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IvoryTowerDenizen)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2014, 10:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-top-this-lame-excuse/699047/4 "2014-09-20T22:52:40Z")
> [@Mr.Accident](#): > > Was other siblings getting texts from him? If not, it could actually be a viable excuse. My fiances phone will on occasion go over a week without being able to send texts, but can receive them. Just out of the blue it’ll start back allowing outgoing texts. My daughter’s phone can currently send, but not receive texts (this is documented), so unless other folks have been getting texts from him, I’m not sure I’d think he was lying. ---
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2014, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-top-this-lame-excuse/699047/5 "2014-09-20T22:56:40Z")
> [@Mr.Accident](#): > > Was other siblings getting texts from him? If not, it could actually be a viable excuse. My fiances phone will on occasion go over a week without being able to send texts, but can receive them. Just out of the blue it’ll start back allowing outgoing texts. We have two desktops, a laptop, and a tablet, not to mention DH has a work computer, and they all can email to text. Not to mention, I think there’s the implication that if you are receiving texts, _you have a phone. Call._ Say “I can’t text now, but I got your text.” ---
**Author:** ![Becky2844](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/91b2a8/32.png) [@Becky2844](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Becky2844)\ **Post date:** [September 21, 2014, 2:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-top-this-lame-excuse/699047/6 "2014-09-21T02:32:14Z")
My MIL was visiting when we mentioned that a party was coming up and we needed a babysitter. She said, “We’re going to be sick that weekend.” ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [September 21, 2014, 3:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-top-this-lame-excuse/699047/7 "2014-09-21T03:56:40Z")
Only Assholes Text. ---
**Author:** ![Sarabellum](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sarabellum/32/3492_2.png) [@Sarabellum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sarabellum)\ **Post date:** [September 21, 2014, 5:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-top-this-lame-excuse/699047/8 "2014-09-21T05:58:32Z")
Had an employee claim she couldn’t work (her entire shift that day) because the dome light in her car needed a new bulb. ---
**Author:** ![iamthewalrus\_3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/258eb7/32.png) [@iamthewalrus\_3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iamthewalrus_3)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2014, 4:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-top-this-lame-excuse/699047/9 "2014-09-22T16:31:42Z")
I’m still curious if the excuse was actually disproved. Did anyone else receive a text during this time? It’s not impossible that his phone wasn’t sending texts and he didn’t even realize it wasn’t working. Many people do very little communication by text message. ---
**Author:** ![Hermitian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hermitian/32/470_2.png) [@Hermitian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hermitian)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2014, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-top-this-lame-excuse/699047/10 "2014-09-22T17:16:32Z")
> [@weef](#): > > My brother-in-law wasn’t answering my wife’s texts for weeks. There was nothing so important that she had to actually make a phone call but they usually check up on each other every few days via texts. Other siblings had heard from him so there was no concern (every now and then my brother-in-law goes AWOL and as long as we know he’s not lying in a ditch somewhere all is fine). Maybe I’m wandering away from the topic, but their marriage/expectations/interactions appear very different from mine and others that I know. In other words, if an individual was so irresponsible that he tends to go AWOL for weeks at a time, wouldn’t you also _expect_ him to lie about text messages? ---
**Author:** ![Revtim](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/revtim/32/1042_2.png) [@Revtim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revtim)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2014, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-top-this-lame-excuse/699047/11 "2014-09-22T17:19:19Z")
Incoming texts working but outgoing texts not working seems possible to me. But I used to test telecom systems professionally, so I’ve seen pretty much any phone fuckup. ---
**Author:** ![Joey\_P](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/919ad9/32.png) [@Joey\_P](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Joey_P)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2014, 5:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-top-this-lame-excuse/699047/12 "2014-09-22T17:40:08Z")
I employ a lot of high school kids. We always know it’s the beginning of the end for one of them when they call in with the excuse that their car isn’t working (or they can’t drive in the snow) and then turn down the offer for someone to come pick them up, which we’re always more than happy to do. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Great\_Unwashed](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_great_unwashed/32/4791_2.png) [@The\_Great\_Unwashed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Great_Unwashed)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2014, 5:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-top-this-lame-excuse/699047/13 "2014-09-22T17:42:39Z")
“The dog ate my tex!” ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2014, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-top-this-lame-excuse/699047/14 "2014-09-22T17:52:12Z")
_My_ lamest excuse was a phone call to a friend telling him that “something came up” so we couldn’t stop by his place that evening. He replied that he was just gonna call to lemme know that “something came up” and he wouldn’t be home anyway. Turns out we were talking to each other on the phone, but sitting ten yards away from each other. At a bar. After fighting with our SOs over some dumb shit. ---
**Author:** ![Kiber](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kiber/32/317_2.png) [@Kiber](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kiber)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2014, 5:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-top-this-lame-excuse/699047/15 "2014-09-22T17:53:08Z")
About fifteen years ago we had some overnight snow in Atlanta which was going to cause severe delays on the roadways. Early the next morning, I had an employee call me at home to say that he wouldn’t be able to make it to work that day because the roads were too bad. No problem, right? Well - as he was talking I happened to check caller ID and saw that he was calling from . . . . the office. Yep - my employee called from the office to say that he wouldn’t be able to make it to work that day since the roads were too dangerous. Turns out he had come in early to get some large trays we use in the lab - he wanted to bring them home and use them for sledding with his kids who were off school that day. ---
**Author:** ![Ravenman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ravenman/32/2929_2.png) [@Ravenman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ravenman)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2014, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-top-this-lame-excuse/699047/16 "2014-09-22T17:57:32Z")
Someone claimed that they couldn’t go to work one day because she shared a driveway with her neighbors, and a plumber making a long service call left his truck parked in the middle of the driveway. She simply couldn’t back her car out of the garage with that truck in the way! ---
**Author:** ![Ximenean](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/aca169/32.png) [@Ximenean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ximenean)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2014, 6:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-top-this-lame-excuse/699047/17 "2014-09-22T18:17:47Z")
> [@Hermitian](#): > > Maybe I’m wandering away from the topic, but their marriage/expectations/interactions appear very different from mine and others that I know. I think you may be making the same mistake I did - misreading it as the brother-in-law failing to answer his _own_ wife’s texts. ---
**Author:** ![Filbert](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/filbert/32/3433_2.png) [@Filbert](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Filbert)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2014, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-top-this-lame-excuse/699047/18 "2014-09-22T18:27:42Z")
At a previous flat, there was a several mold problem, to the extent that, at one point, one of the bedrooms was unusable. It was a rental, so after messing about a bit as normal, he landlord sent some guys round to look at it. Yep, they said. It’s mold. Then they left. Two weeks later they showed up again. When asked where the hell they’d been for two weeks, the reply was… ‘We had to go buy some paint’. Incidently, just in case you’re wondering, the paint they showed up with was budget white paint from a DIY shop 15 minutes walk from the flat. And yes, painting over it was all they did. ---
**Author:** ![Revtim](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/revtim/32/1042_2.png) [@Revtim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revtim)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2014, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-top-this-lame-excuse/699047/19 "2014-09-22T18:28:43Z")
> [@Kiber](#): > > About fifteen years ago we had some overnight snow in Atlanta which was going to cause severe delays on the roadways. Early the next morning, I had an employee call me at home to say that he wouldn’t be able to make it to work that day because the roads were too bad. No problem, right? Well - as he was talking I happened to check caller ID and saw that he was calling from . . . . the office. Yep - my employee called from the office to say that he wouldn’t be able to make it to work that day since the roads were too dangerous. > > Turns out he had come in early to get some large trays we use in the lab - he wanted to bring them home and use them for sledding with his kids who were off school that day. Did you confront him about it? ---
**Author:** ![Kiber](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kiber/32/317_2.png) [@Kiber](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kiber)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2014, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-top-this-lame-excuse/699047/20 "2014-09-22T18:38:45Z")
> [@Revtim](#): > > Did you confront him about it? Absolutely - I have to admit I did rather enjoy the pained silence coming across the line as I imagined the look on his face. In the end, however, I had no problem with him taking a vacation day to spend with his kids. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/can-you-top-this-lame-excuse/699047.md?page=2)