Can you use alcohol when cooking for a recovered alcoholic?

I’m a recovering (sic) alcoholic who hasn’t had a drink in over 25 years, and I prefer not to eat anything that is cooked with wine, beer, or hard liquor, since I’m never confident that all the alcohol has burned off.

Others, as noted, are not quite so hardline on the issue.

I’d find a different recipe.

Interesting tips.

I know substitutes in recipes are possible but do you really get the same results? I mean, substituting grapefruit for beer doesn’t seem right to me. They are both bitter and I am no expert in cooking but the acidity of the grapefruit I would expect would change the recipe dramatically.

The thing with chicken is that it holds the flavor of the alcohol quite well. I know I marinate my chicken breast in a beer base mixture.

After the chicken is cooked, there is no doubt the the chicken was marinated in beer. Tasty, but if I were an alcoholic, this dish might stir up temptation.

Fair enough and I will not cook the recipe in the OP for someone who has issues with alcohol.

I am curious though if you unknowingly chomped into that chicken would you recoil sensing the alcohol? Would it reignite your desire to drink?

I want to be clear: I am NOT intending to sneak some alcohol laden food on people. I am just interested in the overall question. I WILL NOT knowingly do this to anyone who I know is a recovering/recovered alcoholic without an OK from them.

When my brother was in the earlier stages of recovery, he was adamant about no booze in cooking, no booze in the house, etc. I think he felt that he was too susceptible or vulnerable to even the flavor. Now that it’s been thirty years, it’s not a problem for him. What I’m saying is, if you’re planning to cook for an alcoholic, ask first if it’s a problem. He’ll have no problem with telling you.

I can’t speak for anyone else, but on one occasion when I inadvertently ordered my mum an alcoholic drink (how was I to know that something called a “fruit cup” would be laden with gin?!) she grimaced the moment she took a mouthful, spat it out, and switched to something soft. But she was more than 10 years sober by then. In early recovery, especially in very early recovery when the physical dependency on alcohol was still present, she might have reacted differently, I don’t know.

I highly doubt a mouthful of booze-soaked chicken is going to send someone with a decent amount of sobriety off on a bender, but as others have pointed out, it could still be unpleasant for them. Interestingly, my mum won’t drink cola, because she used to drink it with vodka, and it still “tastes” of that to her, so you never know what’s going to trigger associations for someone.

The only time I have ever spat out something made with booze was at a Christmas party where there was a big plate of homemade candy, truffles and suchlike. I bit into what turned out to be a rum ball and spit it out immediately – luckily I had a napkin in my hand, it’s not like it turned into a big ugly scene.

If someone serves a main dish in their home that has wine or whatever in it, I’ll generally taste it, cautiously, and perhaps eat a little to be polite, but fill up on salad or side dishes instead. Most of my friends know I’m recovering, so if it’s just a couple people for dinner they don’t cook with booze; at a dinner party or other large gathering, there are usually a variety of things to eat so I just eat something else.

I’m not worried about the taste knocking me off the wagon – I just prefer not to risk consuming alcohol. I think of it as something I’m deeply allergic to – why take risks with my health and wellbeing?

My husband is an alcoholic, not recovering or recovered, but trying the “I’m just going to drink a little like normal people do” route, with spotty success. I’ve decided to not have alcohol in the house for cooking, because I notice that if he smells the boozy smell in the air or sees the bottle, he gets an eager glassy-eyed expression that’s kind of scary. My cooking tastes fine without wine or beer, and it’s good not to have temptation in the house. He gets into enough temptation without having it right at hand.

Fair enough and I can see the issue with having alcohol “meant for cooking” in the house with an alcoholic. That is not going to work well.

Hell, my dad told me in WWII some guys on his ship would drink rubbing alcohol stolen from the ship’s pharmacy.

In my case this is not someone I live with so having it in the house is not an issue.

Cooking wine is salted so that it can’t be drunk.
There’s also wine that has the alcohol removed for cooking.

Funny story, when I was 15 I bought a bottle of cooking wine from the grocery. They didn’t check id. :smiley: I was so proud that I’d pulled a fast one. Until I took a sip and nearly threw up. Salted. Served my 15 year old self right too.

We buy regular wine or rum for cooking. Enough of it burns off that I wouldn’t be afraid to serve it to a Baptist Minister.

Now, rum cake. That’s soaked/marinated in rum after it’s baked. You will get a buzz off that. We make a rum cake every Christmas.

I was arguing the use of the term “recovered alcoholics,” which I believe is semantically equivalent to saying that the condition is past. To my understanding, your “dry for years and now drink socially” acquaintances were either never really alcoholics (possibly they were just drunks, which is not the same thing), or they’re not now as problem-free as you think.

A cite linked in the other thread says,

I thin MsRobyn spelled it out pretty well above.

A hard and fast definition of alcoholism is hard to come by. People are different. One person may need to avoid any contact with alcohol, however slight, for the rest of their life. Others may contact it and manage to not be unduly messed up by it (as mentioned when Jennyrosity inadvertently gave her (his?) mom an alcoholic drink and her mom did not revert to alcoholism from that contact. Indeed her mom immediately spat it out. Or twickster’s rum ball (he likewise spat it out).

I would submit that a “recovered” alcoholic could have inadvertent minor contact with alcohol and not fall off the wagon. Such things are almost bound to happen in the course of a lifetime. The “recovered” alcoholic can weather such hiccups without much fuss (they may not like it but they will not run to the nearest bar either). They have learned how to cope with their addiction such that little, minor encounters with alcohol will not make them fall back into the addiction.

Maybe I am off base but I am content with the term “recovered alcoholic” in this case.

Personal experience here. After eight years of increasingly heavy drinking, with that last year or so very heavy (drinking myself to sleep with J&B every single night) I stopped drinking and spent a few days in a treatment center, a few weeks going to AA meetings and about a year of counseling.

That was more than 22 years ago. I have not had a single drink in all that time.

We have wine in the house (a couple of gift bottles) and my wife has a couple of some kind of Seagrams fruity cooler things in the fridge.

I cook a couple of dishes with wine or cooking sherry. Every once in a while I make Shrimp Mozambique with a can of beer (which has to be specially purchased for the occasion.)

I’ve never entertained the notion of drinking again.

But that’s just me.

I am not aware of any sober alcoholics who call themselves recovered, only recovering.

My compliments to the OP for asking. I’m an alcoholic who reaches 25 years sober this November, who is also very much trying to help another who is newly in recovery. My vote is to steer clear of recipes with alcohol, for a variety of reasons.
I figure many or most alcoholics in recovery will not go off the deep end because they are exposed to a little alcohol in food. I wouldn’t.
But getting away from alcohol is a pretty difficult experience and there are many things that make it harder. It seems really unfair that alcohol sneaks in under the radar in so many ways - we would never be having this conversation about heroin.
By selecting a recipe that does not require alcohol (or modifying one), you can trade one more of those unfair hurts for a helpful gesture, which may never be known or may be recognized and welcomed.
As a flavoring element, alcohol seems repugnant, even the scent of it, to me and some other alcoholics. I generally dislike having it around, even though I don’t feel threatened in my sobriety.
When I hear that somebody opts out of alcohol as a thoughtful gesture to me, I am always touched, though I have never asked anybody to not serve it or not drink. If I attend a gathering that is specifically dry, I LIKE that, it feels nice.

So, I think the idea or worry of sending somebody on a bender is probably an unhelpful guide or source of insight, but a little imagination and insight and well-wishing could be very kind. It’s nice of you to ask.

Cooking a dish called “drunken chicken” is probably a bad idea anyway.

Ex-Alcoholic: “This is really tasty, what’s the recipe called?”

You: “Dr… er, Chicken. In… stuff.” :o

In a timely fashion, my TV Guide just had an article about “Alcohol in food”, where they listed the many hidden stuff that contains traces of alcohol. They had an info box about recovering alcoholics, and their advice was “Don’t give anything with alcohol in it, no matter how small the amount, to an alcoholic; either the alcohol itself or the taste can trigger the desire to start drinking again/ relapse”.

The second advice was “Don’t serve food with alcohol to children, because they might get used to the taste and find real alcohol easier later”.

So, although a TV Guide is low on the scale of serious magazines (on the level of the celeb gossip and housewife mags at the hairdressers), it’s an interesting indication of what’s considered proper behaviour: to err on the cautious side.

I am recovering alcoholic, and I frequently cook with wine, and keep it in the house for that purpose.

However, if you are cooking for a recovering alcoholic, it is always good to ask. There is a wide range of feeling about this, so ask just to be on the safe side.

I would ask – but I have a relative with many years of sobriety who has no problems being around alcohol, though I’d probably triple-check about cooking with it for her.

I wouldn’t cook with it for anybody else in recovery, probably, because it’d just feel weird, and I would never drink in front of somebody without triple-checking with them that it’s okay because I don’t want to come across as a jerk. My first legal drink was in Canada at a table of AA folks (friends of a friend of the family) and I wasn’t going to though I was 20 and kinda dying to but they insisted that I should because, well, legally I could. I didn’t get carded. :frowning: Then I left part of it behind. Oh, the teasing I got…

No. And again, No. If the person had been a crack-head would you sprinkle cocaine on the doughnuts? There are too many other ways to enhance flavor. And recovering alcholics get really tired of hearing stuff like, “I know you can’t drink, but…is this alright?”