# Candles are demonic...yes, that's right: CANDLES

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068>\
**Category:** The BBQ Pit\
**Created:** [January 1, 2004, 4:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068 "2004-01-01T04:26:17Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 3

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**Author:** ![sweetypie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ac8455/32.png) [@sweetypie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sweetypie)\
**Post date:** [January 1, 2004, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068/41 "2004-01-01T17:06:33Z")

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The chemtrails ARE going to kill us, because my mom says they are. She has told me that over and over and over for years so it must be true. My candles returned.

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**Author:** ![gluteus\_maximus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/f17d59/32.png) [@gluteus\_maximus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gluteus_maximus)\
**Post date:** [January 1, 2004, 5:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068/42 "2004-01-01T17:07:37Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> Some accursed objects are: owls, frogs, unicorns, horseshoes; items from other countries such as Africa, China, Japan; American Indian artifacts, carvings, pictures, Buddha statutes. Dolls and stuffed animals - dolls originated in voodoo. Paisley pattern on anything. Nike is a Greek god, according to the dictionary.
> 
> Collections, Pictures of movie stars, some items passed down from ancestors, Shamrocks, Any kind of good luck charm, Statues, Oriental objects, African items, Indian items, American Indian items, Any items that are used in witchcraft, The Book of Mormon, satanic bible, Books on other religions, Rock and roll music, etc.

:eek:

Jeee-zuz! What am I going to do?

I’ve got more goddamned (and probably demonic) **etc.** in my house than you can shake a stick at!

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**Author:** ![vanilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/f19dbf/32.png) [@vanilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vanilla)\
**Post date:** [January 1, 2004, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068/43 "2004-01-01T17:12:37Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by RedFury \*  
> \*\*May I ask how these “demons” you believe in a-Manifest themselves and b-What form they take?
> 
> Of course, if they are of the flesh and blood variety, no further comment is needed as I am – unfortunately – well acquainted with them myself. \*\*

ust a feeling of evil.

No form.

Coils are evil?  
Get rid of the stove!

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**Author:** ![\_possum\_stalker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/_/b77776/32.png) [@\_possum\_stalker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/_possum_stalker)\
**Post date:** [January 1, 2004, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068/44 "2004-01-01T17:13:50Z")

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[From the “watch the hipster taunt the unbalanced fundy” website:](http://postdestination.mybravenet.com/demon_of_scrabble.htm)

> [@](#):
>
> IN THE NAME OF JESUS, I RENOUNCE PLAYING SCRABBLE. I DON’T WANT THESE DEMONS, AND COMMAND THEM TO LEAVE ME. Some demons take a while to get out. We spent four hours straight on one demon. It make take some fasting too. Since you know that this is a demon, make sure you have gotten rid of the game. Burn it, if you can. Know that both of you would have the same demons, so do Deliverance on yourself too. Have you daughter do Deliverance on you. Read our THE BOX article. Threaten to put the demon in THE BOX.

It’s like the Southern demon prison camp! “First possession: demon gits a night in the box. 2nd time: 2 days in the box. 3rd time Cletus jes’ whomps 'em with an ax handle.”

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**Author:** ![vanilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/f19dbf/32.png) [@vanilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vanilla)\
**Post date:** [January 1, 2004, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068/45 "2004-01-01T17:14:12Z")

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that would start out Just a feeling of evil

The demons stole my J!

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**Author:** ![Krisfer\_the\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Krisfer\_the\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Krisfer_the_Cat)\
**Post date:** [January 1, 2004, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068/46 "2004-01-01T17:22:32Z")

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Thanks **Guin** now we have an answer to give out when the hubby’s family starts bugging us about joining “The Church”.

“I’m sorry The Book of Mormon brings demons into our house I read it on the net so it must be real.”

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**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\
**Post date:** [January 1, 2004, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068/47 "2004-01-01T17:23:40Z")

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I’ve got a new word!

ust: a feeling of evil

😃

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**Author:** ![GIGObuster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gigobuster/32/421_2.png) [@GIGObuster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GIGObuster)\
**Post date:** [January 1, 2004, 5:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068/48 "2004-01-01T17:26:05Z")

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My family welcomes the New Year with a marathon game of scrabble, (how geeky can you get? 😃 ) the women in the family are avid candle collectors, who knew we were twice as evil?

:we need an evil smilie!:

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**Author:** ![vanilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/f19dbf/32.png) [@vanilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vanilla)\
**Post date:** [January 1, 2004, 5:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068/49 "2004-01-01T17:26:34Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Eve \*  
> \*\*I _only_ invite guys in if they have demons . . . \*\*

You have a scanner at the door or something?

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**Author:** ![presidebt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c37758/32.png) [@presidebt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/presidebt)\
**Post date:** [January 1, 2004, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068/50 "2004-01-01T17:50:00Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by ‘possum stalker \*  
> \*\*[From the “watch the hipster taunt the unbalanced fundy” website:](http://postdestination.mybravenet.com/demon_of_scrabble.htm)  
> It’s like the Southern demon prison camp! "First possession: demon gits a night in the box. 2nd time: 2 days in the box. 3rd time Cletus jes’ whomps 'em with an ax handle." \*\*

Check this out, from the same page, at the bottom:

> [@](#):
>
> Hi again! If your daughter lives with you, you need to be doing Deliverance more often.  
> Here is the name of a Deliverance minister in Dallas -  
> Norine Mccloud  
> **Wings of Love Flower Mound**

Is it me, or does that bolded part sound like the name of an evangelical brothel? Just thinking about it makes my inner-demon twitch.

PS- **Earthling** , I was calm, but I wasn’t thinking of Deliverance the movie. I get it now. Thanks.

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**Author:** ![IWLN](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b5ac83/32.png) [@IWLN](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IWLN)\
**Post date:** [January 1, 2004, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068/51 "2004-01-01T17:52:30Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by county \*  
> (Me, I been demon-free for years)

Demons are very tricky. That’s what they _want_ you to believe. _Wake up!_ Parking in a fire lane without remorse is a sure sign. _You are not alone!_:eek:

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**Author:** ![\_possum\_stalker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/_/b77776/32.png) [@\_possum\_stalker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/_possum_stalker)\
**Post date:** [January 1, 2004, 6:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068/52 "2004-01-01T18:01:53Z")

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I’m pretty sure if I called the State Police and told them my neighbor was “performing a Deliverance” with his daughter at The Wings of Love Flower Mound, all hell would break loose.

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**Author:** ![vibrotronica](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/a9a28c/32.png) [@vibrotronica](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vibrotronica)\
**Post date:** [January 1, 2004, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068/53 "2004-01-01T18:10:58Z")

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I was just struck by the similarity between this Christian fundamentalist idea of demons and the Scientologist’s conception of [Thetans](http://www.b-org.demon.nl/scn/nl/english/ot3.html)

Witness\*:

Scientologist nutball:

> [@](#):
>
> One’s body is a mass of individual thetans stuck to oneself or to the body.
> 
> One has to clean them off by running incident II and Incident I. It is a long job, requiring care, patience and good auditing.

Fundamentalist Chritian nutball:

> [@](#):
>
> Demons CANNOT get into your Spirit, but they ARE in your body (sickness)and soul (mind, will, emotions). Jesus said Deliverance is the “Children’s bread”. All Believers are the “Children”. Jesus said to cast the demons OUT, so they must be IN

Scientologist nutball:

> [@](#):
>
> You will continue to be you. You, inside, can of course separate out BodyThetans and so solo auditing is the answer. How good do you have to be to run BodyThetans off? Well, if you didn’t skip your grades, Clearing and OT II particularly, you should be able to command BodyThetans easily.

Fundamentalist Christian nutball:

> [@](#):
>
> Get real FREE help for all your personal problems using the Name of JESUS CHRIST to cast these DEMONS out. You must want help to receive this help. You must also be a “TRUE WORSHIPER” (John 4:23) (“REAL” CHRISTIAN) to receive this help. This means you must be willing to change your lifestyle in certain areas. That’s the only rules! Don’t just read, but read and TAKE ACTION.
> 
> You do not have to have your demons cast out to make it to Heaven, but it sure makes your life down here better. You also don’t need to have all YOUR demons cast OUT before you can do Deliverance on others. There is no special “anointing” required. Jesus gave His Power and Authority to ALL Believers.
> 
> CAUTION: A few people have reported that while reading portions of our Deliverance material, some demons have manifested in them in various ways. If this happens, pray this: “FATHER, IN THE NAME OF JESUS, I COMMAND ALL THE DEMONS ATTACKING ME TO LEAVE ME NOW, IN THE NAME OF JESUS.”

Scientologist nutball:

> [@](#):
>
> BodyThetans are just Thetans. When you get rid of one he goes off and possibly squares around, picks up a body or admires daisies.

From the Fundamentalist Christian nutball FAQ:

> [@](#):
>
> 1. Can demons transfer from person to person? - YES! They kinda CLONE. If you talk to a depressed person, you may find out you get depressed. Casting OUT that depressed demon will get rid of it.

and my favorite from the Scientologists, apropos to nothing:

> [@](#):
>
> People who feel dizzy have gotten into the spinning part.

\*ha! witnessing! get it! it’s like a pun…

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**Author:** ![geewhiz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/f0a364/32.png) [@geewhiz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/geewhiz)\
**Post date:** [January 1, 2004, 6:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068/54 "2004-01-01T18:13:30Z")

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Why does everyone seem to pull the weird stuff about Christianity out of the woodwork. Everyone understands that this is not in anyway mainstream stuff right? This sort of stuff is put out by the people we pray don’t show up to the evangelical conferences.

I hate the fact that the normal Christians have to explain the weird people out there.

There is nothing in the Bible that says candles are evil. Candles are not mentioned in the Bible. Oil Changes aren’t either. One cannot deduce something is evil just on the basis that it is not mentioned in the Bible (the same goes for thinking something is ok because it is not mentioned…it might not be)

But if they want to believe weird stuff, then let them make themselves miserable. I have tried to deal with people like this, next to impossible. They won’t listen. So just let them be…

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**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\
**Post date:** [January 1, 2004, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068/55 "2004-01-01T18:19:48Z")

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**geewhiz** , I think most of us recognize the difference between normal Christians (even normal fundamentalist or evangelical Christians) and these nutjobs.

That doesn’t mean that the normal fundamentalist and evangelical Christians get a free ride when they spout something that’s clearly stupid, though. Don’t mistake contention for contempt. We have contempt for the nutjobs. We’re in contention with stupidity and ignorance, whether espoused by Christians or Jews or Hindus or Muslims or atheists.

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**Author:** ![Doomtrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/0ea827/32.png) [@Doomtrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doomtrain)\
**Post date:** [January 1, 2004, 6:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068/56 "2004-01-01T18:44:51Z")

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Seriously, I think this is this person’s way of making his life more exciting. People seem to need some kinda big, overarching conspiracy against them to be happy. For some, it’s their boss keeping them down. For others, it’s the CIA or the Devil, or the demons in your candles.

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**Author:** ![\_possum\_stalker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/_/b77776/32.png) [@\_possum\_stalker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/_possum_stalker)\
**Post date:** [January 1, 2004, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068/57 "2004-01-01T18:45:44Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> Why does everyone seem to pull the weird stuff about Christianity out of the woodwork. Everyone understands that this is not in anyway mainstream stuff right? This sort of stuff is put out by the people we pray don’t show up to the evangelical conferences.
> 
> I hate the fact that the normal Christians have to explain the weird people out there.

Cool, the “Christian Victim Speech!” I thought that wouldn’t come 'till later.

I advise you stuff it. People think that “liberals” should hafta explain shit like NAMBLA and PETA, so you’re getting off pretty light here.

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**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\
**Post date:** [January 1, 2004, 7:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068/58 "2004-01-01T19:08:36Z")

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“As your war club and weapons of war I break down, undam, and blow up all walls of protection around all witches, warlocks, wizards, satanists, sorcerers, and the like, and I break the power of all curses, hexes, vexes, spells, charms, fetishes, psychic prayers, psychic thoughts, all Witchcraft, sorcery, magic, voodoo, all mind control, jinxes, potions, bewitchments, death, destruction, sickness, pain, torment, psychic power, psychic warfare, prayer chains, incense and candle burning, incantations, chanting, blessings, hoodoo, crystals, root works, and everything else…”  
My Ionic Breeze Quadra does all this, and it’s _quieter_.

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**Author:** ![Earthling](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/90db22/32.png) [@Earthling](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Earthling)\
**Post date:** [January 1, 2004, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068/59 "2004-01-01T19:11:10Z")

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Regarding **Wings of Love Flower Mound** : Dunno if this makes any difference or not, but [Flower Mound](http://tinyurl.com/3xc7q) is the name of a suburb between Dallas and Ft. Worth, Texas.

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**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\
**Post date:** [January 1, 2004, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068/60 "2004-01-01T19:11:33Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Jackmannii \*  
> \*\*“As your war club and weapons of war I break down, undam, and blow up all walls of protection around all witches, warlocks, wizards, satanists, sorcerers, and the like, and I break the power of all curses, hexes, vexes, spells, charms, fetishes, psychic prayers, psychic thoughts, all Witchcraft, sorcery, magic, voodoo, all mind control, jinxes, potions, bewitchments, death, destruction, sickness, pain, torment, psychic power, psychic warfare, prayer chains, incense and candle burning, incantations, chanting, blessings, hoodoo, crystals, root works, and everything else…”  
> My Ionic Breeze Quadra does all this, and it’s _quieter_. \*\*

Whoa! Who knew Sharper Image was in the exorcism business?!

“Yes, you too can drive out the demons, for only $1500. Plus! We’ll throw in a free portable mini-sized Deliverancer!”

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