# Candles are demonic...yes, that's right: CANDLES **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 1, 2004, 4:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068 "2004-01-01T04:26:17Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![IWLN](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b5ac83/32.png) [@IWLN](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IWLN)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2004, 1:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068/101 "2004-01-02T13:49:34Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by EddyTeddyFreddy \* > Given that irrefutable premise, then what would that make our Admin, **Lynn**? The Adminotorious Antichrist? The Administress of Eldritch Evil? :dubious: I think _ **THE DUCHESS OF DOOOOOM** _ is more in line with how I’ve always thought of her.😉 ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2004, 1:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068/102 "2004-01-02T13:56:39Z")
How about _ **The Queen of Quackery Quashing** _? _ **The Empress of Idiot Eradication** _? _ **The Sultana of Swat** _? 😃 Me, I just try not to wind up as the [object of her wrath](http://community.webshots.com/photo/20811372/20811398poKAnrjZeE). :eek: ---
**Author:** ![vanilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/f19dbf/32.png) [@vanilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vanilla)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2004, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068/103 "2004-01-02T15:37:14Z")
I’m still laughing about the demons named “You can’t make me!” ala potty training. Theres also demons called I won’t eat my vegetables! 😉 ---
**Author:** ![istara](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/e79b87/32.png) [@istara](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/istara)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2004, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068/104 "2004-01-02T16:45:18Z")
What I find most fascinating is how this couple met. Were they both already obsessed about demons, with this mutual interest drawing them together at the Halfway House for Halfwits, or is one of them more into it than the other? Does she secretly cringe every time he launches into his brimstone and hellfire, and did she spend those legendary four hours of Deliverance feeling rather half-hearted, if not a little embarrassed, at the whole thing? Does she feel increasingly weary every morning as he scours the paper to find yet another social or cultural phenomenon to denounce as demon-ridden? Is she apprehensive every time she buys a new pair of socks, lest he decide that demons lurk in the elastic, and does she spend ages agonising over which carrot to buy in case she picks one that is too phallic and demon-attracting? ---
**Author:** ![sailor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a587f6/32.png) [@sailor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sailor)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2004, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068/105 "2004-01-02T16:45:33Z")
I saw this movie of two women playing with (unlit) candles and when they touched certain parts of their bodies their faces would grin and make all sorts of gestures like they were out of control. I guess they were being possessed by the demons in the candles. ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2004, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068/106 "2004-01-02T16:56:09Z")
I’ve got it! **Lynn** is: [Rumpole] _ **She Who Must Be Obeyed** _ [/Rumpole] And she does one hell… oops, _heck_ of a job casting demons out of the Pit, huh? ---
**Author:** ![Doomtrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/0ea827/32.png) [@Doomtrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doomtrain)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2004, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068/107 "2004-01-02T17:13:14Z")
I see Lynn as more of a Sorceress of Smite. ---
**Author:** ![Marlitharn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/779978/32.png) [@Marlitharn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marlitharn)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2004, 3:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068/108 "2004-01-03T03:02:50Z")
My sheets are paisley! My husband and I lie in an evil nest of Satanic corruption _every single day!_ On second thought, that’s probably not the fault of the sheets. Demons, schmemons. This whack job gave me a new sig. ---
**Author:** ![danceswithcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9e8a1a/32.png) [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2004, 3:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068/109 "2004-01-03T03:43:43Z")
Hmmm. I knew I should have avoided this thread. Now I’m laboring under the heavy load of knowledge of my sins. I guess my pet parrot is close enough to an owl that I will have to do away with him. By the time I’ve eliminated all of the things on that list, cleanup around here should be a snap-nothin’ to clean! I liked the comments about toilet training, where the child had a deliverance! I’d always called it just going in the potty. Look, Daddy! I didn’t make any deliverance in my panties, today! I just hope some MADs are around to bail me outta jail after I walk into a Chuck E Cheese and whomp them demons off of that there birthday cake with my holy axehandle before the demons get the youn’uns corrupted. Take off them pointy hats, too. :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![Crowbar\_of\_Irony\_3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f08c70/32.png) [@Crowbar\_of\_Irony\_3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crowbar_of_Irony_3)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2004, 2:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068/110 "2004-01-03T14:28:17Z")
[QUOTE] \*Originally posted by fluiddruid \* \*\* > [@](#): > > Know this - EVERYONE has demons, ESPECIALLY CHRISTIANS. > There is no Scripture that says this. It is just a matter of FACT. > There is no Scripture that says you do NOT have demons.[/qupte] > > Er, wow. \*\* I wonder which Bible they are using. My NIV Bible must be written my demons for it contradicts what they are saying! Help! ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2004, 2:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068/111 "2004-01-03T14:41:22Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Marlitharn \* > \*\*My sheets are paisley! My husband and I lie in an evil nest of Satanic corruption _every single day!_ \*\* So are you bragging or complaining? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Marlitharn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/779978/32.png) [@Marlitharn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marlitharn)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2004, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068/112 "2004-01-03T19:16:08Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Lynn Bodoni \* > \*\*So are you bragging or complaining? 😉 \*\* Let’s just say they’ll take my paisley sheets away from me when they pry them from my cold dead hands. ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2004, 11:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068/113 "2004-01-03T23:20:26Z")
If paisley is demonic, what does that make plaid? ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2004, 11:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068/114 "2004-01-03T23:26:19Z")
Plaid attracts the special variety of demons that live in Catholic schoolgirls’ hoohahs. ---
**Author:** ![zephyrine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/35a633/32.png) [@zephyrine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zephyrine)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2004, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068/115 "2004-01-03T23:49:48Z")
I’m a Scot. I was born in PAISLEY. I have my own PLAID. My house is full of CANDLES. I must be evil personified. Go me! ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2004, 11:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068/116 "2004-01-03T23:50:51Z")
Catholic schoolgirls have hoohahs? I thought they weren’t allowed to until they got married. ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2004, 11:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068/117 "2004-01-03T23:57:16Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by EddyTeddyFreddy \* > \*\*Catholic schoolgirls have hoohahs? I thought they weren’t allowed to until they got married. \*\* You haven’t known many Catholic schoolgirls, have you? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Jaade](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/dfb087/32.png) [@Jaade](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jaade)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2004, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068/118 "2004-01-04T19:15:09Z")
Ok…and in the middle of the diatribe, I ran across this: > [@](#): > > Did you know that apple cider or white vinegar is an effective deodorant? You may not believe it, but it is true, and actually works. You must try it to see for yourself.Everything you are about to read is also true, and actually works. You must try it to see for yourself. It seemed…out of place. I scoured the surrounding text to find out how demons got into my Secret deodorant, to no avail. 2000 web pages devoted to this? That’s horrifying in and of itself. ~J ---
**Author:** ![IWLN](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b5ac83/32.png) [@IWLN](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IWLN)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2004, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068/119 "2004-01-04T19:58:46Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Jaade \* > \*\*Ok…and in the middle of the diatribe, I ran across this: > > It seemed…out of place. I scoured the surrounding text to find out how demons got into my Secret deodorant, to no avail. > > 2000 web pages devoted to this? That’s horrifying in and of itself. > > ~J \*\* I wonder if they’re in my _BAN_ too. :eek: I’m thinking that walking around smelling like vinegar will keep a lot of things away. ---
**Author:** ![Jaade](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/dfb087/32.png) [@Jaade](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jaade)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2004, 8:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068/120 "2004-01-04T20:02:41Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Lynn Bodoni \* > \*\*No tattoos for me, thanks. I’m diabetic and I take insulin shots twice daily, plus I check my blood sugar (not as often as I’m SUPPOSED to, but still I take it) so I think that I have enough needlemania going on. > > Heh. Oh yes, I gave out erasers in the shape of frogs last Halloween. I think I should get DOUBLE points for that. > > Someone needs to make up a point system based on this website, and post it in MPSIMS. Or possibly in IMHO, where everyone could compare demonic possession percentages. \*\* I’m your huckleberry: [http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=233097](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=233097) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/candles-are-demonic-yes-thats-right-candles/222068.md?page=7)