# Captain Buckleberryferry and the crew of "The Ted" -sign up here- **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 26, 2003, 12:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/captain-buckleberryferry-and-the-crew-of-the-ted-sign-up-here/190997 "2003-07-26T00:43:17Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 21
**Author:** ![Monstre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e274bd/32.png) [@Monstre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monstre)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2003, 10:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/captain-buckleberryferry-and-the-crew-of-the-ted-sign-up-here/190997/401 "2003-08-19T22:24:31Z")
Who be this Bob of who ye speak? _finds a stowaway behind a barrel and chucks him overboard_ Hmmm… **Security Chief Monstre** … Monstre be likin’ the ring o’ that. Do I get a hat? ---
**Author:** ![BuckleberryFerry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5f9b8f/32.png) [@BuckleberryFerry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BuckleberryFerry)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2003, 10:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/captain-buckleberryferry-and-the-crew-of-the-ted-sign-up-here/190997/402 "2003-08-19T22:28:05Z")
Men, get **Monstre** a hat. Not mine. ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2003, 10:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/captain-buckleberryferry-and-the-crew-of-the-ted-sign-up-here/190997/403 "2003-08-19T22:28:39Z")
Get yer own hat! But you’ll be needin’ this fish in yer ear. ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2003, 10:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/captain-buckleberryferry-and-the-crew-of-the-ted-sign-up-here/190997/404 "2003-08-19T22:30:31Z")
Sorry Cap’n Sir Ma’am. I was speak’n to the Monstre, not t’ you. ---
**Author:** ![BuckleberryFerry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5f9b8f/32.png) [@BuckleberryFerry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BuckleberryFerry)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/captain-buckleberryferry-and-the-crew-of-the-ted-sign-up-here/190997/405 "2003-08-20T01:51:07Z")
**First Mate NoClue** , is that any way to treat a newcomer? We be pirates, but we not be heathens. Ye’ll be apologizin’, I’m sure. And, dare I ask, why the fish? ---
**Author:** ![tunabreath](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/838e76/32.png) [@tunabreath](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tunabreath)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 2:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/captain-buckleberryferry-and-the-crew-of-the-ted-sign-up-here/190997/406 "2003-08-20T02:28:30Z")
Cap?! er,… me friend eddie, ye knows Edward Teach? Ahem , uhhmmm, he sail’t me an him many sails we sailed did we. This **Bob** I ne’er plunder’d or hear’d plunderin of. Know ye not leest ye ken know lator. Eddie be the blaggardest blaggard they be. He tyes ‘is beard t’ burn 'e does. Beggin **Cap** ’s pardon I does. They calls ‘im Blackbeard they do but he be only one o’ many o the seas we must come t’ort as well. I warned ye t’fore and as well again I will. Ne’er call 'im Eddie, 't’ss a family thing it is be it. Cap? Be they hills ‘pon horizon? One oye be less good’nuff t’ see too far past r compass Look out! Ahoy! Whot see ye? **Bob**? See Ye well? ---
**Author:** ![BuckleberryFerry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5f9b8f/32.png) [@BuckleberryFerry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BuckleberryFerry)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 2:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/captain-buckleberryferry-and-the-crew-of-the-ted-sign-up-here/190997/407 "2003-08-20T02:41:55Z")
Whar be our lookout? Be we nearin’ Port Royal at last? Me hopes it be so; I know a good blacksmith thar what can nicen up me scabbard withou’ callin’ the Navy 'pon us. ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 2:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/captain-buckleberryferry-and-the-crew-of-the-ted-sign-up-here/190997/408 "2003-08-20T02:44:03Z")
Very well, Cap’n Sir Ma’am. ‘Ere’s yer stinkin’ hat, you **Monstre**. The pity I didn’t stick a cutlass in ye when ye “just showed up” like ye did. So, ‘ere’s my apology… as a warnin’… Watch yerself! Neptune knows I shall be. M’ bones don’t feel right when 'e’s around. There’s something evil and other worldly about 'im, don’t ye know. [peers into the distance] [looks up at crow’s nest] Look out! Answer the pilot! Be ye see’n land? ---
**Author:** ![El\_Marko](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/58956e/32.png) [@El\_Marko](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Marko)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 12:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/captain-buckleberryferry-and-the-crew-of-the-ted-sign-up-here/190997/409 "2003-08-20T12:34:04Z")
Sorry Cap’n! a pirate’s gotta sleep sometime, eh? No where were I? Blow me down! Oi must a been asleep longer’n oi thunk. Land ho, Cap’n! Oi makes it out ta be Port Royal, two points ta port an’ fair soight she be at that. Be thar shore leave in our future Cap’n? ---
**Author:** ![Scuba\_Ben](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/278dde/32.png) [@Scuba\_Ben](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scuba_Ben)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 2:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/captain-buckleberryferry-and-the-crew-of-the-ted-sign-up-here/190997/410 "2003-08-20T14:01:38Z")
Arrr, Cap’n, NoClueMate, me be wonderin’… iffen we put inta Port Royal, flyen’ th’ sheet o’ genteels o’ fortune from arrrrr mainmast, is we likes ta run inta trouble with th’ bleedin’ Limeys an thar gunboats? Now I likes a good fight as much as the next tar afor th’ mast, at least on th’ high seas, me just thinks that fighten’ in th’ ‘arbor cin gets a mite ‘airy, as tharrrrs likes as not tah be sevr’l ships o’ th’ line in port. E’en th’ bestest broadsides canna do much against long odds. So me’s be thinken’ (‘tween cleanin’ off cannon from arrrr catches) did we grab a merchie’s rag th’t we could run up, in place o’ our own sheet? And arrrr, welcome aboard **Monstre** , glad yarrr on arrrr side. ---
**Author:** ![tunabreath](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/838e76/32.png) [@tunabreath](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tunabreath)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 2:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/captain-buckleberryferry-and-the-crew-of-the-ted-sign-up-here/190997/411 "2003-08-20T14:14:13Z")
Two points t’port ‘tis! coarse 108. It’ll be noice ta get the sharp edges on this ‘ere diamond rounded off a bit. A good fake oye it makes an’ a fearsum sight it be starin out o me oye socket an oll, but the cuts be anoyin’. **Monstre**? Be those scales? Or ye just be needin a good scrapin’? No wonder ye needs a hat. ---
**Author:** ![BuckleberryFerry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5f9b8f/32.png) [@BuckleberryFerry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BuckleberryFerry)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 4:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/captain-buckleberryferry-and-the-crew-of-the-ted-sign-up-here/190997/412 "2003-08-20T16:06:42Z")
Arrrgh, cursed sea-hampsters be stealin’ me posts. Anyway, aye, thar be shore leave in yer near future, men. And ‘slong as ye be doin’ honest business in port, ye be safe from the Navy. They be…errrr…let’s say that the rules are most certainly “guidlines” to them. ::pirate chuckle:: S’no lootin’ or pilferin’, and pay fer whatever ye be buyin’, and thar’ll be no one checkin’ ye fer brands. We’ve more’n enough plunder to pay, and we can always get more on the voyage out. Iffn’ yer cutlass or what-not needs a shine or a fixin’, I knows an honest blacksmith near port what won’ two-time us. He be cheap for 'is good work, too. Now prepare to make berth, men, and raise them non-threat’nin’ colors. ---
**Author:** ![BuckleberryFerry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5f9b8f/32.png) [@BuckleberryFerry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BuckleberryFerry)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/captain-buckleberryferry-and-the-crew-of-the-ted-sign-up-here/190997/413 "2003-08-20T16:09:12Z")
Confounded smilies! That thar be :: pirate chuckle :: ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 5:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/captain-buckleberryferry-and-the-crew-of-the-ted-sign-up-here/190997/414 "2003-08-20T17:07:11Z")
I’m just fishin’. ---
**Author:** ![Monstre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e274bd/32.png) [@Monstre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monstre)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/captain-buckleberryferry-and-the-crew-of-the-ted-sign-up-here/190997/415 "2003-08-20T17:47:34Z")
> [@](#): > > from _tunabreath_ > Monstre? Be those scales? That be fur, coverin’ rock hard sinew. Ye mighten try movin’ yer patch to o’er the bad oye, not the good one. > [@](#): > > from _NoClueMate_ > But you’ll be needin’ this fish in yer ear. Arrrr, that be a leech, not a fish. I won’ be fallin’ fer yer tricks, ye scurvy… thing! [eats a sea-hamster] ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/captain-buckleberryferry-and-the-crew-of-the-ted-sign-up-here/190997/416 "2003-08-20T20:50:38Z")
Quatermaster! Pay the dockmaster. And make sure 'e knows not to ask or say anything about the _Ted_. If offer’n more money don’t help, threaten ‘im. I don’t want anything untowards ‘appenin’ t’ this fine ship or 'er crew. Cap’n Sir Ma’am! Request permission to disembark and procure us some much needed supplies. I’ll need a coupla good trustworthy men to assist me. What say ye? ---
**Author:** ![BuckleberryFerry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5f9b8f/32.png) [@BuckleberryFerry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BuckleberryFerry)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/captain-buckleberryferry-and-the-crew-of-the-ted-sign-up-here/190997/417 "2003-08-20T21:43:25Z")
Take who ye need, **First Mate NoClue**. ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/captain-buckleberryferry-and-the-crew-of-the-ted-sign-up-here/190997/418 "2003-08-20T21:55:50Z")
[looks around} You You You And you, **Monstre**. Be puttin’ some pants on. And meet us at _The Barrel of Rum Taverne_. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 10:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/captain-buckleberryferry-and-the-crew-of-the-ted-sign-up-here/190997/419 "2003-08-20T22:53:56Z")
I’m still fishin’. ---
**Author:** ![Michael\_Ellis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/977dab/32.png) [@Michael\_Ellis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Michael_Ellis)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/captain-buckleberryferry-and-the-crew-of-the-ted-sign-up-here/190997/420 "2003-08-20T23:33:09Z")
Ye Gawds! Is there earthquake happenin’ 'ere or 'ave I been at sea fer too long? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/captain-buckleberryferry-and-the-crew-of-the-ted-sign-up-here/190997.md?page=20) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/captain-buckleberryferry-and-the-crew-of-the-ted-sign-up-here/190997.md?page=22)