# Carnivore Parents Forcing Their Beliefs on Vegan Kids. **URL:** \ **Category:** Great Debates\ **Created:** [March 7, 2019, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/carnivore-parents-forcing-their-beliefs-on-vegan-kids/830717 "2019-03-07T18:58:57Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 8\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![iamthewalrus\_3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/258eb7/32.png) [@iamthewalrus\_3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iamthewalrus_3)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2019, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/carnivore-parents-forcing-their-beliefs-on-vegan-kids/830717/61 "2019-03-11T16:46:24Z")
> [@UltraVires](#): > > My job is not to accommodate their preferred diet. I feed them food. I wouldn’t have such a wide ranging like or dislike for different types of foods if my mother hadn’t made me eat them. > > Once I turned 18, I vowed never to eat liver and onions again, and I have not. But at least I know I don’t like them because I have tried them before. I totally agree with most of what you’re saying in this thread. People often do coddle their children too much and a lot of a parent’s job is to make decisions for their children. But I notice that you keep conflating a food preference with ethical beliefs. A child (I’m assuming a teenager here) self-realized enough to express an ethical objection against animal products isn’t the same as a five year old not wanting to eat their vegetables, or demanding that pizza be served at every meal. > [@](#): > > As the child gets older, it could be an excellent teaching point. We provide you food, but if you prefer something else, then you can take your allowance, go to the grocery store and buy the food you like. We won’t be ordering take out for you. As long as the food the child wants to eat is similar in cost to the food you’re making, it seems punitive to force them to use their allowance. In this case, replacing meat with beans or lentils is going to result in a net reduction in food costs. Seems like a fairer plan that would teach Real Life Skills™ would be to give the kid a budget and make them come up with a meal plan. > [@](#): > > And when dinner is being prepared, you can join your mother in the kitchen and cook your food. Absolutely. ---
**Author:** ![bump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7c8e57/32.png) [@bump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bump)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2019, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/carnivore-parents-forcing-their-beliefs-on-vegan-kids/830717/62 "2019-03-11T18:27:57Z")
> [@choie](#): > > a bit like keeping kosher Actually… that makes me think- what if a kid from a Christian family was to convert to Judaism, and wanted to keep kosher? Are the parents required or obligated in any way to indulge that, or is that the kid’s problem, even if they’re not torqued that they chose a different religion than the rest of the family? Same basic issue- what is the parental obligation to accommodate a child’s differing beliefs, when they’re significantly different than the rest of the family? ---
**Author:** ![UltraVires](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/ecccb3/32.png) [@UltraVires](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UltraVires)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2019, 8:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/carnivore-parents-forcing-their-beliefs-on-vegan-kids/830717/63 "2019-03-11T20:29:00Z")
> [@bump](#): > > Actually… that makes me think- what if a kid from a Christian family was to convert to Judaism, and wanted to keep kosher? > > Are the parents required or obligated in any way to indulge that, or is that the kid’s problem, even if they’re not torqued that they chose a different religion than the rest of the family? > > Same basic issue- what is the parental obligation to accommodate a child’s differing beliefs, when they’re significantly different than the rest of the family? AFAIK, there are no such requirements for a parent. When Mom tells you that you are going to put on a tie and go to church on Sunday, it sure as hell wouldn’t have worked for me to say that I had just converted to Judaism or became an atheist. I think that is part of parental control that is permitted of children in that they are not little adults that can choose these sorts of things. ---
**Author:** ![iamthewalrus\_3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/258eb7/32.png) [@iamthewalrus\_3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iamthewalrus_3)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2019, 9:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/carnivore-parents-forcing-their-beliefs-on-vegan-kids/830717/64 "2019-03-11T21:39:30Z")
> [@UltraVires](#): > > AFAIK, there are no such requirements for a parent. When Mom tells you that you are going to put on a tie and go to church on Sunday, it sure as hell wouldn’t have worked for me to say that I had just converted to Judaism or became an atheist. Because you’d just be saying it to get out of church, or because they would have ignored your actual legitimate spiritual searching? Again, there’s a legit difference between say, a 10 year old who is bored on Sunday mornings and 16 year old who’s begun to question the faith they were raised in. Just like a teenager deciding to be vegan isn’t the same thing as not liking the family meatloaf recipe. Preferences aren’t the same as moral stances. From a point of practicality, at some point, “You’re going to church whether you believe in it or not” seems like a good way to get the same result your mom got with you vis a vis liver and onions. You also mention that it wouldn’t have worked for you to get out of church that way, but should it have? Differentiate between a legitimate change of faith and an excuse. What if you’d wanted to go to Hebrew school instead of church. Based on your post I’m guessing that wouldn’t have worked either, but should it have? If one of my kids as a teenager comes to me and expresses a sincere belief in some other faith I hope I’ll give them credit, just like I would have wanted my parents to listen to me about that issue. I agree that there’s probably no legal requirement that a parent do any of that. ---
**Author:** ![Weedy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/weedy/32/301_2.png) [@Weedy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weedy)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2019, 10:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/carnivore-parents-forcing-their-beliefs-on-vegan-kids/830717/65 "2019-03-11T22:52:52Z")
> [@Littleman](#): > > I give it an extremely high chance they will be treated as having an eating disorder. > If they are that stubborn in their choice, choosing not to eat to that degree will at the least get them a psych eval to determine if their choice restriction actually lands them in the realm of anorexia. > > Good luck finding a facility with a vegan options in their refeeding guideline for any malnourished patient. At least in Australia, management of an eating disorder in a child includes family counselling. Most parents of anorexic children are desperate to get their child to eat. I think saying “my child is quite willing to eat these healthy, nutritious foods but I would rather see them starve” is going to get the parent in therapy rather than the child. ---
**Author:** ![Weedy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/weedy/32/301_2.png) [@Weedy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weedy)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2019, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/carnivore-parents-forcing-their-beliefs-on-vegan-kids/830717/66 "2019-03-11T22:59:32Z")
To add to my previous post: Eating disorders are often about control issues. In this hypothetical of a child who would rather starve than eat meat, and parents who would rather see them starve than give in, control issues are a pretty big problem. ---
**Author:** ![Brayne\_Ded](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Brayne\_Ded](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Brayne_Ded)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2019, 11:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/carnivore-parents-forcing-their-beliefs-on-vegan-kids/830717/67 "2019-03-11T23:12:42Z")
Frankly, being vegetarian is not a good idea for children, and being vegan even less so, as it is difficult to ensure proper nutrition. The problem is mainly but not exclusively protein. But teenagers can become vegan if they want, that is not really a problem. Some vegan friends have produced food that was very tasty, but I still feel that it lacks variety overall. Mind you, I feel the same about steak and potatoes, it’s actually rather monotonous. ---
**Author:** ![bump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7c8e57/32.png) [@bump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bump)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2019, 2:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/carnivore-parents-forcing-their-beliefs-on-vegan-kids/830717/68 "2019-03-12T02:55:20Z")
Just for the record, I’m not postulating a situation where the child is going to starve. What I’m saying is that if a child is old enough to make that choice, be it religion, vegetarianism/veganism, or just that they REALLY want a $1000 coat, and that’s not in the family’s SOP, then _they_ are the ones responsible for making that happen. Otherwise they can make do with what’s provided by the family. I guess the way I look at it is that deciding you’re a vegetarian/vegan as a kid is akin to deciding that you don’t like chicken or some other food. Fine- if that’s what we’re eating on some night, then you can make your own arrangements. Nobody’s forcing them to eat meat, but nor is whoever’s cooking expected to cater to their whims, and whoever’s doing dishes isn’t on the hook for however many extra pots and pans it takes to cook the vegan meal either. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/carnivore-parents-forcing-their-beliefs-on-vegan-kids/830717.md?page=3)