# Cashiers: would it kill you to be friendly to a customer? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [April 25, 2013, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cashiers-would-it-kill-you-to-be-friendly-to-a-customer/656631 "2013-04-25T00:00:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Troppus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a587f6/32.png) [@Troppus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Troppus)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2013, 1:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cashiers-would-it-kill-you-to-be-friendly-to-a-customer/656631/81 "2013-04-26T01:35:12Z")
> [@madmonk28](#): > > Great post, especially since you used Kitty Genovese as an example, which is awesome because it never happened. Also calling people fuckers for not being polite is awesome. You are a complete moron. If you’re one of the people who needs to treat a minimum wage grunt with total disdain just to feel a tiny bit superior then _fucker_ is the nicest word I could apply. ---
**Author:** ![Myrnalene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c4cdca/32.png) [@Myrnalene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Myrnalene)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2013, 1:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cashiers-would-it-kill-you-to-be-friendly-to-a-customer/656631/82 "2013-04-26T01:55:25Z")
> [@Kimmy\_Gibbler](#): > > Living one’s life with a sense of personal efficacy and refusing to essentialize oneself as a victim of the world has. Funny, I can’t think of a better example of acting like a victim of the world than someone who gets their feelings hurt because the person who sold them their Big Mac didn’t smile wide enough. Seriously, why are people weighing their extremely brief retail encounters with such importance? Were you looking to make that pit stop at CVS the social highlight of your day…or? ---
**Author:** ![expectopatronum](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/expectopatronum/32/173_2.png) [@expectopatronum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/expectopatronum)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2013, 2:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cashiers-would-it-kill-you-to-be-friendly-to-a-customer/656631/83 "2013-04-26T02:07:21Z")
excellent posts, **apollonia**. thank you for reminding me how lucky i am to be out of retail. ---
**Author:** ![Kimmy\_Gibbler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Kimmy\_Gibbler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimmy_Gibbler)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2013, 2:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cashiers-would-it-kill-you-to-be-friendly-to-a-customer/656631/84 "2013-04-26T02:09:44Z")
> [@Myrnalene](#): > > Funny, I can’t think of a better example of acting like a victim of the world than someone who gets their feelings hurt because the person who sold them their Big Mac didn’t smile wide enough. Seriously, why are people weighing their extremely brief retail encounters with such importance? Were you looking to make that pit stop at CVS the social highlight of your day…or? Having a sense of personal efficacy doesn’t mean have a Pollyanna-ish notion that everything is right with the world. It means having a sense of the magnitude of one’s personal disappointments. (A rare competence for internet libs, I know…) Thus, observing, “You know this transaction will probably be more pleasant for everyone concerned if we all approach it with a feeling of good will and diligence” is a reasonable reaction to surly behavior. Squaking “THIS JOB SUCKS AND I’M NOT GONNA BE HAPPY ABOUT IT UNLESS YOU PAY ME 80 THOUSAND DOLLARS TO BE A HAMBURGER CLERK,” on the other hand, is an exaggerated response to dissatisfaction with one’s job. Perhaps a more moderated response, such as, “This isn’t the greatest job in the world, but if I do it well, I’ll get some skills that will allow me to move into a position more suited to my interests.” (Cue internet “liberal”: “DON’T THINK LIKE THAT! THAT IS PIE-IN-THE-SKY THINKING! YOU WILL ALWAYS BE A VICTIM!! ONLY NURSING A GRIEVANCE WILL GET YOU ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD!!! YOU NEED TO BE RESENTFUL!”) ---
**Author:** ![Hershele\_Ostropoler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e47c2d/32.png) [@Hershele\_Ostropoler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hershele_Ostropoler)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2013, 3:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cashiers-would-it-kill-you-to-be-friendly-to-a-customer/656631/85 "2013-04-26T03:04:36Z")
I don’t need to be friends with the cashier (or with most people). I’m not there for social interaction, I’m there to get in, get my stuff, and get out. I mean, I’m not going to be hostile to clerks who are friendly, I’m not an asshole about it, but it’s not even remotely related from what I’m trying to get out of the encounter. ---
**Author:** ![Alice\_The\_Goon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ed8c4c/32.png) [@Alice\_The\_Goon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alice_The_Goon)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2013, 3:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cashiers-would-it-kill-you-to-be-friendly-to-a-customer/656631/86 "2013-04-26T03:19:21Z")
All of these people talking about wanting cashiers to be your friends, or have a conversation, etc.- no, that’s not the point. They could say hello. Or thank you. Fuck, is that so difficult to understand? When I am spending my money in the business that you work for and represent, and you don’t say one word to me, that just leaves me feeling cranky and insulted in a way as I leave. And you can say oh well, I don’t care, but if everyone leaves feeling that way, and none of them come back, and they tell their friends and family and neighbors not to come back, and you end up without a job because your place of business had to close, wouldn’t you want to go back in time and just say hi? ---
**Author:** ![colander](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e8c25b/32.png) [@colander](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/colander)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2013, 3:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cashiers-would-it-kill-you-to-be-friendly-to-a-customer/656631/87 "2013-04-26T03:59:03Z")
uh oh. this is one of those issues that are emblematic of class struggles in urban America again, isn’t it. god i hate white people ---
**Author:** ![Hershele\_Ostropoler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e47c2d/32.png) [@Hershele\_Ostropoler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hershele_Ostropoler)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2013, 4:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cashiers-would-it-kill-you-to-be-friendly-to-a-customer/656631/88 "2013-04-26T04:24:44Z")
> [@Alice\_The\_Goon](#): > > When I am spending my money in the business that you work for and represent, and you don’t say one word to me, that just leaves me feeling cranky and insulted in a way as I leave. Yeah, but that’s neurotic. ---
**Author:** ![alphaboi867](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alphaboi867/32/3898_2.png) [@alphaboi867](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alphaboi867)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2013, 4:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cashiers-would-it-kill-you-to-be-friendly-to-a-customer/656631/89 "2013-04-26T04:26:53Z")
> [@BorgHunter](#): > > It only works this way for a few professions, like restaurant servers. If your job title is “cashier” (or whatever euphemism is _en vogue_ for that these days) and you’re working for a big chain, there’s probably a corporate policy preventing you from accepting tips. I worked as a lot associate at a big-box home improvement store 1 summer in college. It was the most unpleasant & degrading job I’ve had in my life. For less than $1 above minimum wage I got to work outside corralling carts & loading things like air conditioners, appliances, lumber, and bags of fertilizer/concrete/stone into people’s cars. Most customers were nice to indifferent, the ones that were bad were really bad, and contractors were the absolute fucking worst. “You’re not loading my 800lb of concrete fast enough!”, “What da mean you can’t tie anything down?”, “My car’s not to small to fit this,” “Duct tape those 2x4s to my roof!”. :rolleyes: One woman actually filed a complaint against me because of my “poor hygiene” (Sweethart you try smelling like a rose after handling bags of manure in July). I even walked away from designer soccer cunt who purchases I wasn’t loading fast enough _and_ who took that moment tell her little brats that _I_ was why they should study hard in school & go to college. :mad: The company strictly prohibited anyone from accepting tips on pain of termination. _Everyone_ completely ignored that, including managment. Hell one time one of the ASMs helped me load a fridge, the customer tipped both of his, and he gave me his tip as soon as she got in her car. > [@Dinsdale](#): > > …But I’m not too sure I appreciate too much friendliness…At a Coach store recently, the staff were asking more personal questions about our plans for the weekend than I would expect of my immediate family! And in one store - J. Jill I believe - the staff are so aggressively friendly to a degree that I have seen other customers respond very negatively. So it can be taken too far. I hate that too. [QUOTE=Troppus] I agree with this. Customer facing positions require courtesy and a good attitude. If that isn’t you, work behind the counter, in the stockroom,.. [/QUOTE] It doesn’t help that in alot of stores you basically have to work your way up to a behind the scenes jobs. Most places I’ve worked cashiers were lower on the store totem pole than anybody besides the cleaners, & the lot boys. When I worked the convenience store & everyone was expected to be a jack-of-all-trades we’d actually have arguments over things like who _got_ mop floors/stock the shelves/empty garbage/etc and who _had to_ stay on register. The only thing everybody could agree was worse than waiting on customers was cleaning the _public_ bathroom. > [@apollonia](#): > > Hour 2 of a cashier’s shift is likely to be something like this:… Nice post, but you left out a few things. Like not having the front-end supervisor or manager on duty respond to you pages (or radio it’ll be a 5-15 min wait), customers freak out over getting carded, try to cut in line, complain about people cutting in line, try to use their foodstamps to buy stuff that isn’t food (or hot food), WIC, pay with gift cards from other stores, use Canadian money, checks when the store doesn’t take checks, coupon games, notice that you’re white and make a whispered comment about how many niggers are in the store today (& get upset when you get offended), proposition you sexually, ask if you’ve found Jesus, tell you that you shouldn’t be working on the Sabbath or holiday, flip out because they’re short & need to run out to their & you won’t let them take the groceries with them, or insist the register’s math is wrong. _Not_ that they insist something came up wrong, or they didn’t get a discount, or they’re being charged tax when they shouldn’t, but that the register made an actual mathmatical error adding fully correct prices up. :rolleyes: Something I’ve never, ever seen or heard of any POS doing. Oh, and let’s not forget the old lady who complains you made the bag holding her 1 gallon of milk too heavy. Or not getting a break or lunch remotely on time or having to beg a sup to take over your register for a few minutes so can go pee in front of the customers. > [@Filbert](#): > > I did once have a coworker in a shitty retail place who started literally throwing people’s change at them, then standing there sneering at them while they picked it up… Ha, I once quit a retail job by literly running out of the store screaming “I quit!” after one customer finally pushed me over the edge. > [@Alessan](#): > > I don’t think you can be sullen and efficient at the same time. You can be _surly_, which is a bit more proactive. Out of curiosity what’s customer service like in Israel, especially at everyday shops away from tourists? The one Israeli I met in a customer service role in the States was selling skin care products on commission, and gave me a very strange hard sell. In that he kept testing stuff out on my left hand while telling me about how his girlfriend uses the same stuff _and flirting with me._ He was really cute too. ---
**Author:** ![Rollo\_Tomasi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/58956e/32.png) [@Rollo\_Tomasi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rollo_Tomasi)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2013, 4:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cashiers-would-it-kill-you-to-be-friendly-to-a-customer/656631/90 "2013-04-26T04:31:50Z")
> [@california\_jobcase](#): > > I just want cashiers to quit trying to pile the coins on top of the bills when they hand me my change. Gimme the coins first, dammit!! That definitely makes more sense on the surface, but at least in my case, we were instructed to hand over the bills first and then the coins, because it minimizes skin-to-skin contact. Yes, really. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Alice\_The\_Goon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ed8c4c/32.png) [@Alice\_The\_Goon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alice_The_Goon)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2013, 4:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cashiers-would-it-kill-you-to-be-friendly-to-a-customer/656631/91 "2013-04-26T04:35:10Z")
> [@Hershele\_Ostropoler](#): > > Yeah, but that’s neurotic. Not really. Sounds like other people experience this. I’m not particularly neurotic or anything- pretty normal. ---
**Author:** ![colander](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e8c25b/32.png) [@colander](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/colander)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2013, 5:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cashiers-would-it-kill-you-to-be-friendly-to-a-customer/656631/92 "2013-04-26T05:05:26Z")
> [@Alice\_The\_Goon](#): > > Not really. Sounds like other people experience this. I’m not particularly neurotic or anything- pretty normal. Where does this come from? Did they invite all the people waiting ahead of you to their wedding reception but decide to give you the cold shoulder? Surely you agree that it is irrational to take as a personal affront the mannerisms of a cashier who acts identically indifferent to every customer, right? ---
**Author:** ![Inner\_Stickler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inner_stickler/32/318_2.png) [@Inner\_Stickler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inner_Stickler)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2013, 5:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cashiers-would-it-kill-you-to-be-friendly-to-a-customer/656631/93 "2013-04-26T05:46:03Z")
I don’t need cashiers to externally validate me. I know I’m awesome, they don’t need to tell me. I just want milk. ---
**Author:** ![Troppus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a587f6/32.png) [@Troppus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Troppus)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2013, 6:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cashiers-would-it-kill-you-to-be-friendly-to-a-customer/656631/94 "2013-04-26T06:39:54Z")
> [@Inner\_Stickler](#): > > I don’t need cashiers to externally validate me. I know I’m awesome, they don’t need to tell me. I just want milk. Yah, maybe. But it’s possible that the previous ten customers were similarly smug and dismissive, and the difference between a clerk’s good day and shitty day was the one guy who appreciated and returned the courtesy. ---
**Author:** ![Odesio](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/odesio/32/20003_2.png) [@Odesio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Odesio)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2013, 6:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cashiers-would-it-kill-you-to-be-friendly-to-a-customer/656631/95 "2013-04-26T06:55:56Z")
> [@alphaboi867](#): > > Out of curiosity what’s customer service like in Israel, especially at everyday shops away from tourists? The one Israeli I met in a customer service role in the States was selling skin care products on commission, and gave me a very strange hard sell. In that he kept testing stuff out on my left hand while telling me about how his girlfriend uses the same stuff _and flirting with me._ He was really cute too. Ha! There was an Israeli woman at McCain Mall, North Little Rock selling “Dead Sea” salts who used the same technique. She made intense eye contact while rubbing the salt into my left palm while telling me what a great gift this would make my wife/girlfriend. Normally I just walk right by salespeople like this but she was so good at her spiel that I just had to stop and enjoy it for a minute. I didn’t buy any of the Dead Sea salt though. ---
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2013, 11:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cashiers-would-it-kill-you-to-be-friendly-to-a-customer/656631/96 "2013-04-26T11:32:45Z")
> [@alphaboi867](#): > > Out of curiosity what’s customer service like in Israel, especially at everyday shops away from tourists? The one Israeli I met in a customer service role in the States was selling skin care products on commission, and gave me a very strange hard sell. In that he kept testing stuff out on my left hand while telling me about how his girlfriend uses the same stuff _and flirting with me._ He was really cute too. It depends. Workers are informal, like Israelis tend to be (there’s no way anyone can get them to repeat rote phrases, for instance), and have no porblem speaking their mind, but the actual quality of service varies. As a rule, the younger retail workers are, the nicer they are. This, I think, has something to do with Israeli society as a whole. Because of the mandatory military service, middle-class kids don’t go to college at 18. Instead, they get out of the military in their early 20s, work a bit, travel a bit, and then go to school - but because most colleges don’t have dorms, most of them end up working through school to help pay the rent. That means that most young retail workers tend to be energetic, reasonably well-educated and, most importantly, optimistic, because they know that they’re only working a temporary job before they start with their \*real \*lives. That’s also why people don’t look down on young retail workers here; as far as Israelis are concerned, no job you have under the age of 30 is degrading. On the other hand, older retail workers - the “lifers” - either come from a lower socioeconomic background, or have been stuck in their jobs since school. As a result, they’re understandably less enthusiastic about their work, and tend to more closely resemble what you see in the U.S. ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2013, 11:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cashiers-would-it-kill-you-to-be-friendly-to-a-customer/656631/97 "2013-04-26T11:54:02Z")
> [@Cheesesteak](#): > > Pay minimum wage, get minimum effort. …have minimum opportunity to move up when your bad attitude is noted. Actually, I prefer **not** to have super-friendly effusive cashiers. I just want to pay for my crap and move on. ---
**Author:** ![Peremensoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ce7236/32.png) [@Peremensoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peremensoe)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2013, 12:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cashiers-would-it-kill-you-to-be-friendly-to-a-customer/656631/98 "2013-04-26T12:07:08Z")
> [@Hershele\_Ostropoler](#): > > I don’t need to be friends with the cashier (or with most people). I’m not there for social interaction, I’m there to get in, get my stuff, and get out. > > I mean, I’m not going to be hostile to clerks who are friendly, I’m not an asshole about it, but it’s not even remotely related from what I’m trying to get out of the encounter. In short: there is no way to avoid or refuse certain simple social interactions without being an asshole. Neither party is supposed to ‘get’ anything out of it except an amicable passage through the society of other humans. ---
**Author:** ![Myrnalene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c4cdca/32.png) [@Myrnalene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Myrnalene)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2013, 12:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cashiers-would-it-kill-you-to-be-friendly-to-a-customer/656631/99 "2013-04-26T12:24:06Z")
All the posters saying “well, with that shitty attitude you’ll never get a promotion!”. Uh. You realize not everyone is trying to make a career out of their cashier job, right? Some people do choose to make a career out of retail and are happy and fulfilled and that’s great for them. But many people who work at entry level positions in these places do it as a stopgap because it’s the only thing they can get at the moment. Everyone knows that cashiers work very hard for little money but typically it’s a job that’s easy to get and hey, sometimes you’d rather not be homeless. And before “well if they don’t slobber sunshine and rainbows at me that means they are professional victims and will never get anywhere in life!”…no. It means _that job_ sucks ass and people are human beings who get worn down by it sometimes. ---
**Author:** ![AnaMen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/dfb087/32.png) [@AnaMen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AnaMen)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2013, 1:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cashiers-would-it-kill-you-to-be-friendly-to-a-customer/656631/100 "2013-04-26T13:47:14Z")
DC does have some of the worst employees imaginable. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cashiers-would-it-kill-you-to-be-friendly-to-a-customer/656631.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cashiers-would-it-kill-you-to-be-friendly-to-a-customer/656631.md?page=6)