# Cat in the Hat - Oh those silly reviewers **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [November 21, 2003, 5:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cat-in-the-hat-oh-those-silly-reviewers/214533 "2003-11-21T17:02:49Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![BizarroRonJeremy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4da419/32.png) [@BizarroRonJeremy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BizarroRonJeremy)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2003, 5:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cat-in-the-hat-oh-those-silly-reviewers/214533/1 "2003-11-21T17:02:49Z")
As everyone knows, today the Cat in the Hat came out. The LA Times reviewer, Manohla Dargis, wrote such a cute and original Dr. Seussian-flavored review…(note: dripping sarcasm). This is not the first time I’ve read a movie review where the writer reverted to copying a style in the hopes of being witty and original. Anyways, these couplets suck… IE: “Quinn is played by a Baldwin called Alec An actor whose presence is decidedly phallic.” Oh, ha ha ha…that is sooo funny…more please “Kelly Preston plays the sizzling young mother, A woman in need of more than a brother.” Huh? Can any other dopers recall when a reviewer mimicked the Dr. Seuss’ style to lambaste a film (The Grinch or the Cat)? ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2003, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cat-in-the-hat-oh-those-silly-reviewers/214533/2 "2003-11-21T17:10:10Z")
Well, it’s not in verse, but you have to love the _New York Times_’ rave review: " . . . a vulgar, uninspired lump of poisoned eye candy . . . scarcely a moment of genuine laughter in the mercifully brief 78 minutes . . . a grueling, chaotic stew of forced whimsy . . . like a noisemaker wielded by a drunken birthday-party clown desperate to prevent his cranky audience from showing signs of boredom . . . this Cat should be tied up in a sack and drowned . . . “Make that cat go away! Tell that cat in the hat you do not want to play.” ---
**Author:** ![BizarroRonJeremy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4da419/32.png) [@BizarroRonJeremy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BizarroRonJeremy)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2003, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cat-in-the-hat-oh-those-silly-reviewers/214533/3 "2003-11-21T17:25:09Z")
Wow… I wonder what the NY Times reviewer REALLY thought. Great imagery, though: “like a noisemaker wielded by a drunken birthday-party clown desperate to prevent his cranky audience from showing signs of boredom” Nice. ---
**Author:** ![DaddyTimesTwo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/f07891/32.png) [@DaddyTimesTwo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DaddyTimesTwo)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2003, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cat-in-the-hat-oh-those-silly-reviewers/214533/4 "2003-11-21T17:43:21Z")
I can’t imagine how anyone thought this movie would be anything but dreadful. While I’ve never been a big fan of Jim Carrey, I have enjoyed some of his films and he was funny on “In Living Color”. But his part in the rape-and-pillaging of the Grinch has pretty much turned me against him for the rest of my life. I hope the flop of this film will put and end to more Dr Suess “adaptations”. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2003, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cat-in-the-hat-oh-those-silly-reviewers/214533/5 "2003-11-21T17:48:52Z")
Mike Meyers is a one-trick pony and one of the least funny “comics” to come along. It’s no wonder this thing is a stinker. ---
**Author:** ![dalovindj](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/65b543/32.png) [@dalovindj](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dalovindj)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2003, 6:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cat-in-the-hat-oh-those-silly-reviewers/214533/6 "2003-11-21T18:12:09Z")
The McDonalds rhyming adds kill me also. I’m sure that Dr. Seuss wanted his books aimed at helping kids to be used to pimp fast food that is pretty bad for anyone. And I’m sure he’d have wanted them to ape his style while doing it. Hey, maybe next they can use a John Lennon song in a sneaker commercial. Remind me to burn all of my art after I die. DaLovin’ Dj ---
**Author:** ![Duderdude2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/cdc98d/32.png) [@Duderdude2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duderdude2)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2003, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cat-in-the-hat-oh-those-silly-reviewers/214533/7 "2003-11-21T18:27:41Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Chefguy \* > \*\*Mike Meyers is a one-trick pony and one of the least funny “comics” to come along. It’s no wonder this thing is a stinker. \*\* Yeah, that must be why Wayne’s World and Austin powers also stunk :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2003, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cat-in-the-hat-oh-those-silly-reviewers/214533/8 "2003-11-21T18:38:24Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Duderdude2 \* > \*\*Yeah, that must be why Wayne’s World and Austin powers also stunk :rolleyes: \*\* They both reeked. ---
**Author:** ![Avalonian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ee7513/32.png) [@Avalonian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Avalonian)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2003, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cat-in-the-hat-oh-those-silly-reviewers/214533/9 "2003-11-21T18:38:28Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Duderdude2 \* > \*\*Yeah, that must be why Wayne’s World and Austin powers also stunk :rolleyes: \*\* And those prove Myers isn’t a one-trick pony how? Mind you, I think Myers is good at what he does, but what he does is pretty limited. When I saw, in the recent ads, the Cat in the Hat performing standard comedy schticks such as DiD (Dressing in Drag), GWitN (Getting Whacked in the Nards), and MICAC (Making Inappropriate Comments Around Children), it became clear that I wouldn’t be needing to see this movie. If anything, I expect it’ll be worse than _Grinch_. That one had its moments, though it wasn’t good either. I don’t think Myers’ take on _Cat in the Hat_ will be anything but warmed-over Myers material. The previews I’ve seen and the reviews I’ve read have done nothing to convince me otherwise. My wife and I, avid Dr. Seuss fans, will likely boycott this film. ---
**Author:** ![tanstaafl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ba8739/32.png) [@tanstaafl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tanstaafl)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2003, 6:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cat-in-the-hat-oh-those-silly-reviewers/214533/10 "2003-11-21T18:44:43Z")
> [@](#): > > Jim Carrey played Grinch; now Mike Myers plays Cat. > Though Carrey held his own, Myers falls flat. > > Garish colors and quips do not a movie make, > but see it if you insist – this is just my take. The full rhyming review is at [Mr. Cranky](http://www.mrcranky.com/movies/catinthehat.html) ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2003, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cat-in-the-hat-oh-those-silly-reviewers/214533/11 "2003-11-21T18:52:51Z")
I would not watch it in a boat! I would not watch it with a goat! I would not watch it in a tree! I would not watch it with a bee! I would not watch it there or here! I might go watch it if you buy the beer. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Doomtrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/0ea827/32.png) [@Doomtrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doomtrain)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2003, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cat-in-the-hat-oh-those-silly-reviewers/214533/12 "2003-11-21T19:09:15Z")
The sad thing is it’ll make a mint from parents desperate to distract their children for a few hours. ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2003, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cat-in-the-hat-oh-those-silly-reviewers/214533/13 "2003-11-21T19:09:23Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by dalovindj \* > \*\*I’m sure that Dr. Seuss wanted his books aimed at helping kids to be used to pimp fast food that is pretty bad for anyone. \*\* Wasn’t Dr. Seuss a cranky old bastard who hated kids? _Biography_ is doing him, and that’s what they implied in the promos . . . ---
**Author:** ![Slacker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6bbea6/32.png) [@Slacker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slacker)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2003, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cat-in-the-hat-oh-those-silly-reviewers/214533/14 "2003-11-21T19:11:57Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by tanstaafl \* > \*\*The full rhyming review is at [Mr. Cranky](http://www.mrcranky.com/movies/catinthehat.html) \*\* lol you beat me to it. "All we learn in this town of neon-colored hordes, is that product placement rules, which explains all the Fords. This Cat’s like a fart from which we all sit downwind. He’s a bit of Buddy Hackett, and a lot of Paul Lynde." ---
**Author:** ![dalovindj](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/65b543/32.png) [@dalovindj](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dalovindj)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2003, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cat-in-the-hat-oh-those-silly-reviewers/214533/15 "2003-11-21T19:21:01Z")
[quote] Wasn’t Dr. Seuss a cranky old bastard who hated kids? [/quotes] Makes sense. He’s trying to correct what he see as wrong with kids these days. The Seuss stuff was created to help solve what was seen as a deficit in the education of children. The fact that this stuff sprung from a man who wasn’t happy with the way kids were turning out isn’t that surprising. Doesn’t mean that he would be happy that his art and images are being used to promote a very unhealthy food source. The whole thing was centered around helping to correct a public concern (the lack of proper education in children) after all. I don’t think that using that material for the purpose of pimping something that is a big part of an unhealthy lifestyle. I may be wrong of course, but I’d be surprised. DaLovin’ Dj ---
**Author:** ![dalovindj](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/65b543/32.png) [@dalovindj](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dalovindj)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2003, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cat-in-the-hat-oh-those-silly-reviewers/214533/16 "2003-11-21T19:21:38Z")
[quote] Wasn’t Dr. Seuss a cranky old bastard who hated kids? [/quotes] Makes sense. He’s trying to correct what he see as wrong with kids these days. The Seuss stuff was created to help solve what was seen as a deficit in the education of children. The fact that this stuff sprung from a man who wasn’t happy with the way kids were turning out isn’t that surprising. Doesn’t mean that he would be happy that his art and images are being used to promote a very unhealthy food source. The whole thing was centered around helping to correct a public concern (the lack of proper education in children) after all. I don’t think that using that material for the purpose of pimping something that is a big part of an unhealthy lifestyle would have gone over to well while he was alive. I may be wrong of course, but I’d be surprised. Why didn’t they make these movies when he was alive? DaLovin’ Dj ---
**Author:** ![Agrippina](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8797f3/32.png) [@Agrippina](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Agrippina)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2003, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cat-in-the-hat-oh-those-silly-reviewers/214533/17 "2003-11-21T19:28:05Z")
I didn’t think _Grinch_ was that bad of a movie. But I have no desire to see _Cat…_. The makeup job they do on Myers scares me. ---
**Author:** ![dalovindj](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/65b543/32.png) [@dalovindj](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dalovindj)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2003, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cat-in-the-hat-oh-those-silly-reviewers/214533/18 "2003-11-21T19:58:53Z")
Damn, I blew that post twice. Ignore those. Let’s try one more time: > [@](#): > > Wasn’t Dr. Seuss a cranky old bastard who hated kids? Makes sense. He was trying to correct something he saw as being wrong with kids ‘these days’. The Seuss stuff was created to help solve what was seen as a deficit in the education of children. The fact that this stuff sprung from a man who wasn’t happy with the way kids were turning out isn’t that surprising. Doesn’t mean that he would be happy that his art and images are being used to promote a very unhealthy food source. The whole thing was centered around helping to correct a public concern (illiteracy in children) after all. I don’t think that using that material for the purpose of pimping something that is a big part of an unhealthy lifestyle would have gone over to well while he was alive. I may be wrong of course, but I’d be surprised. I wonder why they didn’t make these movies when he was alive? > [@](#): > > In May of 1954, Life published a report concerning illiteracy among school children. The report said, among other things, that children were having trouble to read because their books were boring. This inspired Geisel’s publisher, and prompted him to send Geisel a list of 400 words he felt were important, asked him to cut the list to 250 words (the publishers idea of how many words at one time a first grader could absorb), and write a book. Nine months later, Geisel, using 220 of the words given to him published The Cat in the Hat, which went on to instant success. > > In 1960 Bennett Cerf bet Geisel $50 that he couldn’t write an entire book using only fifty words. The result was Green Eggs and Ham. Cerf never paid the $50, by the way… The whole thing sprung from a desire to fight against illiteracy, so I very much doubt that the same material being used to advertise for a company that is a big part of the obesity problem (another public well being issue) would have been kosher. Especially since [obesity in kids](http://www.obesity.org/subs/childhood/prevalence.shtml) is a very real problem these days. DaLovin’-forgettin’-to-preview-Dj ---
**Author:** ![mobo85](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b19c9b/32.png) [@mobo85](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mobo85)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2003, 8:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cat-in-the-hat-oh-those-silly-reviewers/214533/19 "2003-11-21T20:00:50Z")
_The Cat in the Hat_-Oh, those silly reviewers! They think that this cat should go back to the sewers. [This Catholic review](http://decentfilms.com/reviews/catinthehat2003.html) rhymes too, and I think this guys’ Seussian tribute’s much better than the _LA Times_ tries. I’m sure there are more. (Hey, there couldn’t be less.) I agree with you **Eve** , the _New York Times_’ guess Of the quality is quite a funny ol’ note. I’ll break out of the rhyme and I’ll add in a quote: > [@](#): > > I am tempted to say that this Cat should be tied up in a sack and drowned, but I wouldn’t want to condone cruelty to animals, even metaphorically. Cruelty to classic works of children’s literature is bad enough. Neutering, to prevent this beast from spawning sequels, is perhaps the most humane solution. I think you can see that, no need to explain, Ol’ Theo S. Geisel has entered my brain. I have to stop soon while I am still alive, So I guess I will stop here now. -m85 ---
**Author:** ![deb2world](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/7cd45c/32.png) [@deb2world](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/deb2world)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2003, 8:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cat-in-the-hat-oh-those-silly-reviewers/214533/20 "2003-11-21T20:27:44Z")
[confession] Cat in the Hat scares me, even as a child it ranked right up there with the abominable snow man of Rudolph The Rednose Reindeer fame. [/confession] [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cat-in-the-hat-oh-those-silly-reviewers/214533.md?page=2)