Don’t be silly. Cats lack a soul – the divine spark – that empowers the ability to perform baptism. For that, one needs to employ the Canis Familiaris, seen below administering the sacred rite. I ask you, what is “dog” spelled backwards?
https://www.scarymommy.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/10/shutterstock_353813945-587x335.jpg
I would think the backwards spelling proves that dogs are exactly the opposite of godly. The Egyptians worshipped cats–we may have forgotten this, but the cats have not.
Their tongue, which can strip meat right off the bone, reminds us that there is no religious connection without suffering.
Certainly an interesting case, I have never seen anything like it before.
Oh, Catholic history is absolutely rife with these kinds of semantic disagreements erupting into fullblown heresies.
Yes, but I cannot recall them happening in my lifetime.
If you’re already baptized, you can rebaptize yourself, I guess? But, if not, no.
However, this raises the question – can God create an grammatical rule so ridiculous that even He can’t wriggle His way out of it? Apparently yes.
My other favorite bit of Catholic strict adherence to rules was not allowing a girl with celiac to use a gluten-free communion wafer. Can God create a grain so gluten-free that even He can’t transubstantiate into it?
What is the Catholic doctrine on people who die knowing about God but who remain unbaptized? I think some Protestants doom them to Hell for eternity.
Somewhere in the universe, God sits with his head in his hands, ruing some things.
A little common sense - one doesn’t even need to be a Jesuit - would indicate that “we” necessarily includes “I”.
Thousands of baptisms invalidated due to clerical error.
My cat couldn’t baptize its own mother on the baptizingest day of its life if it had an electrified baptizing machine.
Nominated thread winner.
There is also this - video of the conversation between the Pope and that priest has emerged…
Here is a notice from the Diocese of Phoenix. And here is one from the Archdiocese of Detroit about a slightly different situation - in this case, a priest, after watching a video of his own baptism realized that the " We" version was used.
“Does the Pope shit in the woods?”
This is actually the goal of all (?) organized religions. By force, if necessary.
This seems like ascribing goal-directed consciousness to evolution. I think a good model is that religions are information viruses, and the viruses that proliferate are those with the highest infectivity.
Jeez, re-write to eliminate pronoun: You are baptized in the… .
That won’t do. God strangles a kitten every time you use the passive voice.
Are you out there, God, it is us, Margaret?
This is funny. (applause)
LOL. I’m picturing a D&D style cleric that always rolls a 1 on their d20 check for successfully performing a baptism 
. Using one of those dice that has oof in place of the one and yeet in place of the 20 
.