# Catholics - First Communion and God Parents' Attendance **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [January 8, 2007, 3:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/catholics-first-communion-and-god-parents-attendance/387149 "2007-01-08T15:23:13Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2007, 3:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/catholics-first-communion-and-god-parents-attendance/387149/1 "2007-01-08T15:23:13Z")
Do God Parents really need to be present for communion? My wife is Catholic, and my kids are attending Catholic school. So today I get a phone call from my wife informing me that I need to invite my son’s God Parents – my non-Catholic brother and his Ukrainian Catholic wife – to the ceremony in April. No big deal inviting them, it would be nice to see them. But they live 400 miles away and have 2 small kids of their own. It seems a bit much to ask for a one hour service. What if they can’t attend? ---
**Author:** ![solkoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/919ad9/32.png) [@solkoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/solkoe)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2007, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/catholics-first-communion-and-god-parents-attendance/387149/2 "2007-01-08T15:53:20Z")
[QUOTE=Leaffan] Do God Parents really need to be present for communion? My wife is Catholic, and my kids are attending Catholic school. So today I get a phone call from my wife informing me that I need to invite my son’s God Parents – my non-Catholic brother and his Ukrainian Catholic wife – to the ceremony in April. No big deal inviting them, it would be nice to see them. But they live 400 miles away and have 2 small kids of their own. It seems a bit much to ask for a one hour service. What if they can’t attend? [/QUOTE] God parents do not have to attend a first communion. It would be nice if they did because they did commit to support the child in his/her religious upbringing. There are many reasons why a godparent would not attend such a ceremony, distance being one of them. Why not have them stay for a few days and make a nice visit out of it? ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2007, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/catholics-first-communion-and-god-parents-attendance/387149/3 "2007-01-08T16:04:58Z")
[QUOTE=solkoe] …Why not have them stay for a few days and make a nice visit out of it? [/QUOTE] That will be the plan, of course, but I was worried about them **NOT** being able to attend, for any number of reasons, and what the options would be. I have no idea how all this works and was told the God Parents **HAD** to be there. ---
**Author:** ![Enright3](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/enright3/32/2897_2.png) [@Enright3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enright3)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2007, 4:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/catholics-first-communion-and-god-parents-attendance/387149/4 "2007-01-08T16:41:27Z")
They don’t have to be there, it would just be nice. I’m more curious about a non Catholic GodParent? I didn’t think that was allowed. Tom (of Tomndebb fame?) are you out there? My understanding is that a godparent (baptismal sponsor) must be a Catholic who has received the Eucharist and the sacrament of Confirmation, and who is living an active Catholic life. ---
**Author:** ![Tastes\_of\_Chocolate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tastes_of_chocolate/32/3232_2.png) [@Tastes\_of\_Chocolate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tastes_of_Chocolate)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2007, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/catholics-first-communion-and-god-parents-attendance/387149/5 "2007-01-08T16:57:32Z")
I’m a non-Catholic godparent to a Roman Catholic baptised little boy. The parents know and the priest knew before ceremony. When I brought up the issue that I couldn’t promise to help raise my godson as a Catholic, I was told that the parents had gotten an ok, because the other godparent IS a Catholic. I don’t know the official church stance, but there is an example of the practical application. ---
**Author:** ![Bricker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@Bricker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bricker)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2007, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/catholics-first-communion-and-god-parents-attendance/387149/6 "2007-01-08T17:25:19Z")
[QUOTE=Tastes of Chocolate] I’m a non-Catholic godparent to a Roman Catholic baptised little boy. The parents know and the priest knew before ceremony. When I brought up the issue that I couldn’t promise to help raise my godson as a Catholic, I was told that the parents had gotten an ok, because the other godparent IS a Catholic. I don’t know the official church stance, but there is an example of the practical application. [/QUOTE] You’re not a godparent. The other person is the only godparent; you are a “Christian witness.” The Roman Catholic Code of Canon Law, Can. 874 ß1 _et seq_, provides that a godparent must: [ul] [li]Be at least sixteen years of age (exceptions for good reason permitted) (2ƒ)[/li][li]Be a Catholic who has been confirmed and has received the blessed Eucharist (3ƒ)[/li][li]Not be under a canonical penalty (4ƒ)[/li][li]Not be either the father or the mother of the person to be baptized (5ƒ)[/li][/ul] Section ß2 provides specifically: > [@](#): > > A baptized person who belongs to a non-Catholic ecclesial community may be admitted only in company with a catholic sponsor, and then simply as a witness to the baptism. ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2007, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/catholics-first-communion-and-god-parents-attendance/387149/7 "2007-01-08T17:50:00Z")
The baptizing priest was OK with the original God parent scenario: one Catholic, one not. ---
**Author:** ![Sarahfeena](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sarahfeena/32/519_2.png) [@Sarahfeena](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sarahfeena)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2007, 6:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/catholics-first-communion-and-god-parents-attendance/387149/8 "2007-01-08T18:25:15Z")
Some priests “bend the rules” a lot these days. One of my nephews has 2 godparents, neither of which are Catholic. Other priests just don’t ask questions. Technically, all readers & music performers at a Catholic mass are supposed to be Catholic. My best friend is Jewish, and I had her do one of the readings. My priest didn’t ask if my readers were Catholic, and I didn’t mention that she wasn’t. But I did have her do the Old Testament reading (where’s that little Jewish smiley guy when you need him?) 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Sapo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ec9cab/32.png) [@Sapo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sapo)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2007, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/catholics-first-communion-and-god-parents-attendance/387149/9 "2007-01-08T18:32:13Z")
hold on. Godparents for communion? since when? IIRC You only need godparents for baptism and confirmation. And then it is ok for one to be absent at the administration of the sacrament. And, as said, you need to be confirmed to be a godparent. ---
**Author:** ![Bricker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@Bricker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bricker)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2007, 8:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/catholics-first-communion-and-god-parents-attendance/387149/10 "2007-01-08T20:42:15Z")
[QUOTE=Leaffan] The baptizing priest was OK with the original God parent scenario: one Catholic, one not. [/QUOTE] Right - because, according to canon law, that second “godparent” is actually a Christian witness, not a godparent. It may be that the priest felt no particular need to explain that nuance to the family, or, an unlikely prospect but certainly possible, the priest was himself unaware of the requirements of canon law, or disinclined to investigate the matter. ---
**Author:** ![Leviosaurus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/439d5e/32.png) [@Leviosaurus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leviosaurus)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2007, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/catholics-first-communion-and-god-parents-attendance/387149/11 "2007-01-08T21:22:13Z")
My godparents weren’t at my first communion, so my guess is that it’s okay. Then again, I’ve never actually met my godparents that I’m aware of. And my family quit going to church circa 1978. So all thing considered, maybe I’m not the best source here. YMMV. In my own estimation, if my parents had chosen one of their close (non-Catholic) friends to be godparents instead of someone they knew from church, it would have had some actual meaning. Goodonya for choosing someone who actually cares about your kids and having a relationship with them. ---
**Author:** ![Cunctator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/43a26b/32.png) [@Cunctator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cunctator)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2007, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/catholics-first-communion-and-god-parents-attendance/387149/12 "2007-01-08T21:25:31Z")
[QUOTE=Bricker] It may be that the priest felt no particular need to explain that nuance to the family [/QUOTE] I know several priests and this is the approach that they generally favour when asked to accept a non-Catholic as a “godparent”. Even when they do explain that the non-Catholic can only be a “Christian witness” rather than a “godparent”, the non-Catholic party usually still considers himself/herself to be a godparent. It doesn’t really cause any harm and I suppose it’s pastorally sensitive. But as you point out, the non-Catholic is clearly **not** a godparent according canon law. ---
**Author:** ![Cunctator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/43a26b/32.png) [@Cunctator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cunctator)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2007, 9:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/catholics-first-communion-and-god-parents-attendance/387149/13 "2007-01-08T21:28:01Z")
And I forgot to add - I agree with what others have said about godparents’ attendence at their godchild’s first communion. It’s certainly appropriate, but it’s not a requirement. ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2007, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/catholics-first-communion-and-god-parents-attendance/387149/14 "2007-01-08T21:57:12Z")
[QUOTE=Sapo] hold on. Godparents for communion? since when? IIRC You only need godparents for baptism and confirmation. And then it is ok for one to be absent at the administration of the sacrament. And, as said, you need to be confirmed to be a godparent. [/QUOTE] I believe the first communion and confirmation are occurring simultaneously. Sorry. I’m new at this. ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2007, 10:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/catholics-first-communion-and-god-parents-attendance/387149/15 "2007-01-08T22:47:03Z")
[QUOTE=Leaffan] I believe the first communion and confirmation are occurring simultaneously. Sorry. I’m new at this. [/QUOTE] You don’t need the godparents at confirmation either. The person being confirmed picks a sponsor to go up with them. It’s probably someone who has been close to them while they are studying for confirmation. For example, I had a godmother only when I was baptized. She attended my First Communion and Confirmation, but only because she felt like coming. Then my father was my sponsor at Confirmation. ---
**Author:** ![jabiru](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/bbce88/32.png) [@jabiru](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jabiru)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2007, 10:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/catholics-first-communion-and-god-parents-attendance/387149/16 "2007-01-08T22:47:15Z")
[QUOTE=Leaffan] The baptizing priest was OK with the original God parent scenario: one Catholic, one not. [/QUOTE] Same here. We have two sons and had the greatest difficulty in finding adult Catholics (never mind whether they were in good standing or not) to be Godparents to our sons. Both sons have two Godparents, only one of whom is Catholic. None of the Godparents attended either boys’ First Holy Communion or their Confirmations. ---
**Author:** ![Tastes\_of\_Chocolate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tastes_of_chocolate/32/3232_2.png) [@Tastes\_of\_Chocolate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tastes_of_Chocolate)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2007, 12:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/catholics-first-communion-and-god-parents-attendance/387149/17 "2007-01-09T00:19:20Z")
[QUOTE=Bricker] You’re not a godparent. The other person is the only godparent; you are a “Christian witness.” [/QUOTE] The priest specifically used the word godparent to refer to both me and the other person. I guess I’m going to go with that, and the wishes of the parents, over section B2. ---
**Author:** ![doreen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/858c86/32.png) [@doreen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/doreen)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2007, 12:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/catholics-first-communion-and-god-parents-attendance/387149/18 "2007-01-09T00:39:24Z")
I’ve never heard of a religious requirement that the godparents be present for First Communion ( or Confirmation or the wedding). I can ,however, easily imagine telling my husband we had to invite them. Not because of a religious requirement, but simply because in my mind, they fall into the group of persons who should be invited. ---
**Author:** ![Sapo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ec9cab/32.png) [@Sapo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sapo)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2007, 1:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/catholics-first-communion-and-god-parents-attendance/387149/19 "2007-01-09T01:04:58Z")
[QUOTE=Leaffan] I believe the first communion and confirmation are occurring simultaneously. Sorry. I’m new at this. [/QUOTE] oh, those simulsacraments are tricky stuff. Basically the priest does whatever he wants 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Bricker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@Bricker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bricker)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2007, 2:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/catholics-first-communion-and-god-parents-attendance/387149/20 "2007-01-09T02:58:29Z")
[QUOTE=Tastes of Chocolate] The priest specifically used the word godparent to refer to both me and the other person. I guess I’m going to go with that, and the wishes of the parents, over section B2. [/QUOTE] Well, you can, of course, think of yourself however you wish. But according to the law of the Catholic Church, as a non-Catholic, you are not a godparent to a Catholic child. A priest has no authority to contravene that section. If you had been under 16, for example, the law would forbid your being chosen but permits the priest, for good reason, to grant an exception. There is no such exception possibility for the non-Catholicity of a godparent. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/catholics-first-communion-and-god-parents-attendance/387149.md?page=2)