# Cats!!!! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [August 2, 2003, 5:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/192505 "2003-08-02T05:09:56Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![celestina](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/258eb7/32.png) [@celestina](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/celestina)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2003, 5:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/192505/1 "2003-08-02T05:09:56Z")
I don’t understand. I just got you, you naughty, naughty kitty! I know you’ve been though a lot of trauma and drama lately. Well, so have I. I just spent a whole lot of $$ that I don’t have buying you toys. Really. I was shameful up in the Petco gettin’ more excited than a little kid at Christmas, finding you kitty toys. And now you won’t play with them. Instead, you’re having a field day with the bags the toys came in! :mad: What am I going to do with a naughty kitty who looks at me funny when I get her to try to play with her new toys? 😕 Kitty owners, or rather folks who’re owned by their kitties, what am I supposed to do? I got the toys so my bad kitty won’t be bored while her mama has to go to work and stuff. But, she won’t play with them and has the nerve to look at me as if I was crazy for being excited about it being Christmas in July. And those toys are damn cute too. [pout] ---
**Author:** ![danceswithcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9e8a1a/32.png) [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2003, 5:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/192505/2 "2003-08-02T05:20:48Z")
Hmmm. This is your first kitty, yes? ---
**Author:** ![Ferrous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Ferrous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferrous)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2003, 5:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/192505/3 "2003-08-02T05:21:26Z")
Yeah, they never like the things that are sold as cat toys. Bags, little balls of tin foil, glass beads, any little bit of garbage lying around—that’s the kind of stuff they love. My cat goes nuts over those little foam-rubber darts for toy guns. Of course, that’s stuff for them to play with alone. If you’re going to play _with_ them, there’s only one must-have…two words: laser pointer. ---
**Author:** ![Master\_Wang-Ka](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/master_wang-ka/32/3325_2.png) [@Master\_Wang-Ka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Master_Wang-Ka)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2003, 5:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/192505/4 "2003-08-02T05:21:49Z")
Got news for you: real children will do the same damn thing… ---
**Author:** ![Elza\_B](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Elza\_B](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elza_B)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2003, 5:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/192505/5 "2003-08-02T05:29:06Z")
Here’s the thing. You can spend $30 on the coolest cat toys in the store - the ones that you’ll look at and say “That’s awesome! I bet they’ll love that!”, take them home, and make a big presentation to the cat. They’re still going to be happier playing with the tie from the bread or a Coke bottle cap. Save your money. Ava (the girl who spends $5 apiece on catnip cigars for her babies 'cause they’re the only toys they play with) ---
**Author:** ![The\_Mad\_Hermit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b5ac83/32.png) [@The\_Mad\_Hermit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Mad_Hermit)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2003, 6:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/192505/6 "2003-08-02T06:47:27Z")
The human may not choose anything for the Cat. The Cat chooses its own toys. The scratching post is not good enough, it must be the blue chair or the bathroom wall. You may not place anything on the shelf by the window; that is the Observation Perch. It must be left clear so that the yard can be monitored. Boxes and bags are to be explored and conquered. Once the Cat has taken its residence, the human may not move the container without risking the wrath of the Cat. it’s much worse when you have four… ---
**Author:** ![catsix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e19b73/32.png) [@catsix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/catsix)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2003, 6:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/192505/7 "2003-08-02T06:48:03Z")
Cats invariably like toys they ‘create’ on their own out of ordinary household items. The top 3 toys my cats have selected: a large red plastic bead, a long handled 2" paintbrush, and a shoe string. They play hockey with the bead, they hunt the shoestring as I drag it across the floor, and they use the paintbrush to have ‘fights’, chewing on the bristles while kicking the handle on their back on the floor. And forget the ‘kitty bed’. They’d much rather sleep in an empty paper grocery bag turned on its side. At some point, you stop wasting money on toys (apart from catnip) and just start giving them crap you were gonna throw away. ---
**Author:** ![Skeezix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/839c29/32.png) [@Skeezix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skeezix)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2003, 6:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/192505/8 "2003-08-02T06:51:34Z")
**danceswithcats** , exactly what I thought. 🙂 Get yourself a big ole’ honkin’ cardboard box, cut a cat sized hole in one side, leave the top open, and enjoy. For your own amusement, set up a camcorder (if you’ve got one) or just stand where the cat can’t readily see you while digging on the new kitty condo. They’re ever so much more willing to make fools of themselves if they’re not aware they’re being observed. One word of caution: If the bags the cat’s playing with are the plastic variety, ditch 'em quick. Besides the suffocation risk, some cats’ll chew on just about anything, and strips of platic bag are about as wonderful as tinsel for the feline lunatic’s digestive tract. ---
**Author:** ![Tinkertoy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f19dbf/32.png) [@Tinkertoy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tinkertoy)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2003, 6:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/192505/9 "2003-08-02T06:59:32Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Skeezix \* > \*\*strips of platic bag are about as wonderful as tinsel for the feline lunatic’s digestive tract. \*\* Ah! yes the little ready to hang, self made christmas ornaments. ---
**Author:** ![Rigel\_Haloran](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/df705f/32.png) [@Rigel\_Haloran](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rigel_Haloran)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2003, 7:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/192505/10 "2003-08-02T07:00:33Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Ferrous \* > \*\*Of course, that’s stuff for them to play with alone. If you’re going to play _with_ them, there’s only one must-have…two words: laser pointer. \*\* OH YEAH!! Especially with multiple cats that can get so caught up dot tweeking that they run over and into each other ---
**Author:** ![3trew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/3/13edae/32.png) [@3trew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/3trew)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2003, 7:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/192505/11 "2003-08-02T07:08:20Z")
My cat went for the laser pointer once. He pounced on the dot, lifted his paw carefully to get at the victim, found no victim, and ignored it thereafter. As for cat toys, I suggest grasshoppers. The Evil One has been having a lot of fun with those in the back yard lately, they’re cheap, and you should be able to set up a self-sustaining supply after the initial purchase. To those who suggest that an insect infestation might be a bad thing, may I just point out that the place already contains a cat. How much worse can it get? ---
**Author:** ![Ferrous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Ferrous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferrous)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2003, 7:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/192505/12 "2003-08-02T07:17:25Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by 2trew \* > **My cat went for the laser pointer once. He pounced on the dot, lifted his paw carefully to get at the victim, found no victim, and ignored it thereafter.** Well, of course. That’s where you went wrong: you _never_ let them actually catch it. ---
**Author:** ![Uzi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/91b2a8/32.png) [@Uzi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uzi)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2003, 7:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/192505/13 "2003-08-02T07:50:39Z")
I have two cats. A little one half the size of the big one. I got 10 Dell boxes, stacked them 2 across x 5 high. Went right to the roof! Duct taped them all together after cutting holes in strategic locations that would allow them to go between levels, or from one stack to the other. Some holes only small enough for the little one to get through, some so that they had to be contortionists to get between levels. I had to continually re-tape the boxes as they would chase each other throught this thing like maniacs and shake it loose. I cut a few holes here and there so they could look out at the world and many a time a furry arm would stick out to try to snag me as I walked by. It lasted a couple years until they finally scratched it apart. My furniture thanked me. One note: when cutting holes in the boxes make sure you don’t cut a hole in the cat who jumped into the box when you turned around to find the knife. Not that this actually happened mind you! ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2003, 8:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/192505/14 "2003-08-02T08:15:06Z")
> [@](#): > > Kitty owners, or rather folks who’re owned by their kitties, what am I supposed to do? Get another kitty. Cats generally are EASIER to keep in pairs, as they will amuse and exhaust each other. If you really don’t want another kitty, may I suggest milk jug rings? The price is right. Do NOT give cats twist ties or rubber bands. They tend to swallow these things, necessitating emergency vet trips. We buy these cat toys that consist of an elastic string, a hanger, and a furcovered toy. The hanger goes over a door jamb, and the cats can bat the toy for hours without losing it. However, I have strange cats…they actually USE their scratching post. For some reason, cats enjoy sitting or lurking in baskets and boxes. **Uzi** created a cat paradise. Perhaps I’ll scrounge up some boxes and duct tape, I imagine my cats would enjoy something similar. ---
**Author:** ![Fern\_Forest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/71c47a/32.png) [@Fern\_Forest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fern_Forest)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2003, 10:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/192505/15 "2003-08-02T10:09:27Z")
You know, with a title like that I almost expected you to break out in song about the horrors of cats. Just like in that Simpsons episode with the curfew. Can you stuff any of them with catnip? I had a little stuffed mouse that I filled with catnip which eventually was torn to shreds. > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Skeezix \* > \*\*Get yourself a big ole’ honkin’ cardboard box, cut a cat sized hole in one side, leave the top open, and enjoy. For your own amusement, set up a camcorder (if you’ve got one) or just stand where the cat can’t readily see you while digging on the new kitty condo. They’re ever so much more willing to make fools of themselves if they’re not aware they’re being observed. \*\* Kitty Roulette. Make cuts so that you have lots of little swinging windows. Try and poke them fast enough not to get scratched by an attacking paw. My favorite game as a kid. Damn those cats are fast. ---
**Author:** ![sperfur](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a9adbd/32.png) [@sperfur](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sperfur)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2003, 12:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/192505/16 "2003-08-02T12:20:14Z")
In my bedroom at my old house, I had catwalks. What I did was buy a 1x10 board, some L brackets, and some of those carpet doormats (at the $1 store). Cut the doormats in 1/2, screw them to the top of the boards, hang the catwalk 2 feet from the ceiling, put a ramp to it. A little extreme, but the kitties loved it. Kitties were up there all the time. I eventually had them on all four walls of my bedroom - it was the kitties’ favorite place to be. I haven’t put them up yet in the new house. They’ll probably be up by the dopefest we’re having in September, so maybe we’ll take pictures then. Best darn cat toy investment I’ve ever made - much less expensive and much more used than one of those $150 cat trees. ---
**Author:** ![leechbabe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7cd45c/32.png) [@leechbabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/leechbabe)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2003, 12:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/192505/17 "2003-08-02T12:25:31Z")
Cats!!! In one day mine threw up in my bed, went to the toilet on my toilet floor and pee’d in the bread box. Kitty litter try was clean and ready to use. Inside my house is now a kitty free zone. After three months of trying to get the furry beasts to accept the baby I’ve given up. ---
**Author:** ![Bugnorton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e19b73/32.png) [@Bugnorton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bugnorton)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2003, 1:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/192505/18 "2003-08-02T13:00:56Z")
**Steelerphan** has given you an excellent quick start guide to _ **"THE RULES"** _. For a comrehensive run down may I suggest [this link](http://www.meankitty.com). Thanks for the tip about the laser pointer and the proper play techniques, **Ferrous**. We are allowed to share the home of three cats (they even let us keep two dogs as well) and if you are truly a neophyte you may have to get used to something else; as you may have guessed from reading the posts, House Beautiful will probably _not_ be contacting you for a photo shoot anytime real soon. As a lifelong cat/dog person, I learned all of my housekeeping/decorating skills from them (well the cats mostly, because they really care and the dogs will pretty much accept anything as long as it’s offered with love). #1 Rule - Always remember just how lucky you are that kitty allows you to share the home! Now go carve up some boxes, strew some paper bags around, sprinkle the whole thing with a buch of catnip and have FUN! ---
**Author:** ![fotosbyfrank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/54ee81/32.png) [@fotosbyfrank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fotosbyfrank)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2003, 1:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/192505/19 "2003-08-02T13:28:03Z")
I’ve found that outdoor cats are more apt to play with toys inside, than inside cats will (we won’t even discuss the mutant cats on this thread). At one point, we had 3 cats of our own - 2 outdoor cats, and one inside cat. The outdoor cats always brought us ‘presents’ (and, sometimes, they were even dead), and would readily pounce on anything that rolled, squeeked, bounced or otherwise, did more than just lie there. The indoor cat would occcasionally take a swipe at a toy mouse; balls, squeeky toys or anything specificly made for a cat’s amusement was generally ignored. Maybe it has something to do with the ‘hunter instinct’ with outdoor cats. ---
**Author:** ![Bugnorton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e19b73/32.png) [@Bugnorton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bugnorton)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2003, 1:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/192505/20 "2003-08-02T13:37:42Z")
Upon further reflection, I think that the cat just made you pit yourself **Celestina**. Take heed, should you _ever_ doubt just who is in control of whom here… **Your cat just called my cat so she could have me post this just in case you didn’t realize exactly what had happened** [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/192505.md?page=2)