# Cats
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/838656
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
**Created:** [August 14, 2019, 1:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/838656 "2019-08-14T13:46:55Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)
#### Post date: [August 14, 2019, 1:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/838656/1 "2019-08-14T13:46:55Z")
Not enough people have enough cats in their homes.
I recommend at least 1 cat per household, and a total of up to two cats per 500 sq. ft. of living space. This number is not reduced by the quantity or size of non-cat biologicals infesting the living space.
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### Author:  [@Enola\_Gay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enola_Gay)
#### Post date: [August 14, 2019, 1:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/838656/2 "2019-08-14T13:54:40Z")
It outta be a law.
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### Author:  [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)
#### Post date: [August 14, 2019, 1:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/838656/3 "2019-08-14T13:58:21Z")
You’re working for _them_ aren’t you?
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### Author:  [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)
#### Post date: [August 14, 2019, 1:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/838656/4 "2019-08-14T13:59:14Z")
> [@Grrr](#):
>
> You’re working for _them_ aren’t you?
Who doesn’t?
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### Author:  [@Cardigan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cardigan)
#### Post date: [August 14, 2019, 2:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/838656/5 "2019-08-14T14:03:47Z")
They always say dogs have owners, but cats have ‘staff’.
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### Author:  [@Enola\_Gay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enola_Gay)
#### Post date: [August 14, 2019, 2:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/838656/6 "2019-08-14T14:06:58Z")
That’s because they’re [so loyal](https://www.reddit.com/r/gifs/comments/51q4mt/cat_reunited_with_owner_after_two_months_of_being/).
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### Author:  [@Quimby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quimby)
#### Post date: [August 14, 2019, 2:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/838656/7 "2019-08-14T14:54:53Z")
Counter point: if you were small enough to be eaten by a your cat it would eat you.
Sincerely,
The Dog Council.
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### Author:  [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)
#### Post date: [August 14, 2019, 3:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/838656/8 "2019-08-14T15:01:50Z")
^ Dogs don’t _need_ to have an Andrew Lloyd Webber musical.
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### Author:  [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)
#### Post date: [August 14, 2019, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/838656/9 "2019-08-14T15:10:51Z")
> [@Quimby](#):
>
> Counter point: if you were small enough to be eaten by a your cat it would eat you.
>
> Sincerely,
>
> The Dog Council.
Their natural ferocity has not been bred out of them and replaced with mindless loyalty. They love whom they want, they eat whom they want. How can anyone not respect and revere that kind of honesty? 😃
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### Author:  [@EmilyG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EmilyG)
#### Post date: [August 14, 2019, 3:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/838656/10 "2019-08-14T15:11:16Z")
There are too many apartments in my area that don’t allow pets. ☹
It leads to many abandoned pets. It’s so sad.
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### Author:  [@DPRK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DPRK)
#### Post date: [August 14, 2019, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/838656/11 "2019-08-14T15:13:34Z")
> [@Quimby](#):
>
> Counter point: if you were small enough to be eaten by a your cat it would eat you.
[Depends.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z1tih6dsjCg)
That is only borderline “small enough to be eaten”, though.
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### Author:  [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)
#### Post date: [August 14, 2019, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/838656/12 "2019-08-14T15:32:08Z")
> [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](#):
>
> ^ Dogs don’t _need_ to have an Andrew Lloyd Webber musical.
Yet Jesus Christ (Superstar) does? WWJD?
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### Author:  [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)
#### Post date: [August 14, 2019, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/838656/13 "2019-08-14T15:32:50Z")
> [@DPRK](#):
>
> [Depends.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z1tih6dsjCg)
>
> That is only borderline “small enough to be eaten”, though.
If I were a paleolithic cave dude, my tribe would totally have a puma or three. Nobody’d mess with us. The wolf owners next door would fall to the first rival tribe with steaks to occupy the wolf guards. You’d know when you’re crossing into our territory because you’d have to wade through a catnip barrier. And become a ‘toy’.
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### Author:  [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)
#### Post date: [August 14, 2019, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/838656/14 "2019-08-14T16:19:56Z")
You need beams in your ceiling for proper Cat husbandry.
And a huge desire to be subservient to the feline royalty.
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### Author:  [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)
#### Post date: [August 14, 2019, 4:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/838656/15 "2019-08-14T16:58:14Z")
Might we take it as given that the OP himself owns multiple cats? And that their existence at least indirectly prompted this thread? I think that puts this thread in violation of one of the board’s rules.
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### Author:  [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)
#### Post date: [August 14, 2019, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/838656/16 "2019-08-14T16:59:05Z")
Can’t. I’m allergic to them dying.
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### Author:  [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)
#### Post date: [August 14, 2019, 5:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/838656/17 "2019-08-14T17:03:48Z")
> [@Chronos](#):
>
> Might we take it as given that the OP himself owns multiple cats? And that their existence at least indirectly prompted this thread? I think that puts this thread in violation of one of the board’s rules.
Ladies and gentleman, meet [Chicken](https://imgur.com/SI4mC2w). 11 y/o rescue panther.
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### Author:  [@CairoCarol](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CairoCarol)
#### Post date: [August 14, 2019, 5:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/838656/18 "2019-08-14T17:17:10Z")
My house is 1600 sq ft. At 2 cats/500 sq ft, I need 6.4 cats. I only have one, so must acquire 5.4 cats.
I’ll get right on that.
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### Author:  [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)
#### Post date: [August 14, 2019, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/838656/19 "2019-08-14T17:31:07Z")
> [@Inigo\_Montoya](#):
>
> Ladies and gentleman, meet [Chicken](https://imgur.com/SI4mC2w). 11 y/o rescue panther.
Awwww! Chicken is sweet.🙂
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### Author:  [@Tamerlane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tamerlane)
#### Post date: [August 14, 2019, 5:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cats/838656/20 "2019-08-14T17:34:15Z")
> [@CairoCarol](#):
>
> My house is 1600 sq ft. At 2 cats/500 sq ft, I need 6.4 cats. I only have one, so must acquire 5.4 cats.
>
> I’ll get right on that.
One cat is fine. Two is probably optimal. Three is workable in a large enough place. Four-five you’re starting to enter into the “I have too many cats” zone. Six or more if you’re living alone is probably crazy cat person territory ;).
Modifiable by the good old 1 cat + 1 per human living in the house rule.
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