# Cattle mutes **URL:** \ **Category:** Cecil's Columns/Staff Reports\ **Created:** [January 10, 2008, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cattle-mutes/433034 "2008-01-10T21:43:53Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 18\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![James\_R.Leming](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/b4bc9f/32.png) [@James\_R.Leming](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/James_R.Leming)\ **Post date:** [January 10, 2008, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cattle-mutes/433034/1 "2008-01-10T21:43:53Z")
In reference to your one rule: “Don’t be a jerk”, how can you print such meaningless drivel concerning mutes without going to the source? The source I am referring to would be the ‘Holy Grail’ of mute investigators, Capt. Keith Wolverton, of the Cascade County Sheriff’s Office in Great Falls, Montana. With so much at stake, Capt. Wolverton refused to put his name on any investigation until all, and I do mean ALL avenues were examined. Natural causes do not impale the horn into solid clay; nor do they place the animal up under a bush as if to seek cover. I do not know how many sites you have visited personally (I have been to twenty-six) but I have yet to leave one thinking ‘natural causes’. Have a care before you declare… James R. Leming Issaquah, WA ---
**Author:** ![Contrapuntal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e274bd/32.png) [@Contrapuntal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Contrapuntal)\ **Post date:** [January 10, 2008, 10:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cattle-mutes/433034/2 "2008-01-10T22:26:38Z")
Que? ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [January 10, 2008, 10:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cattle-mutes/433034/3 "2008-01-10T22:31:15Z")
I suspect the gentleman is referring to Cecil’s nearly 24-year-old article [What’s the story with cattle mutilations?](http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a2_281.html) ---
**Author:** ![samclem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a9a28c/32.png) [@samclem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/samclem)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2008, 12:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cattle-mutes/433034/4 "2008-01-11T00:53:48Z")
From [Wikipedia](http://64.233.169.104/search?q=cache:bI8Ehypw2ZEJ:en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cattle_mutilation+%22Keith+Wolverton%22+mutilations&hl=en&ct=clnk&cd=1&gl=us) > [@](#): > > Another proponent of the cult hypothesis is Montana author Roberta Donovan. In her 1976 publication “Mystery Stalks the Prairie” she documents the experiences of Deputy Sheriff Keith Wolverton of Great Falls, Cascade County investigating cattle mutilations with suspected cult involvement. > > Since the beginning of the cult hypothesis, law enforcement agents in several states, including Alberta, Idaho, Montana, and Iowa have reported evidence implicating cults in several instances of cattle mutilations.[19] but does not prove involvement beyond reasonable doubt. In case anyone is at all curious about “The Holy Grail of Mute Investigators.” ---
**Author:** ![vison](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/e47774/32.png) [@vison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vison)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2008, 3:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cattle-mutes/433034/5 "2008-01-11T03:45:30Z")
Holy cats. Is this still around? I thought we’d moved on to da Vinci or 9/11 Scholars for Truth, or something. _sigh_ ---
**Author:** ![AskNott](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asknott/32/5790_2.png) [@AskNott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AskNott)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2008, 3:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cattle-mutes/433034/6 "2008-01-11T15:17:13Z")
We have seen an overuse and dilution of the phrase “Holy Grail of” in recent years. This really takes the cake. When there’s a Holy Grail of cattle mute investigations, Holy Grail finally has no meaning at all. Stop it. Find some other poor defenseless phrase to drag around. I’m not even Catholic, but I am gacked when I have the mental picture of a Grail full of decaying cattle anuses and blowfly maggots. Drinking the blood of a holy man is bizarre enough! No maggots in the holy blood, okay? Sheesh. ---
**Author:** ![Contrapuntal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e274bd/32.png) [@Contrapuntal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Contrapuntal)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2008, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cattle-mutes/433034/7 "2008-01-11T15:31:05Z")
Who do you suppose the Holy Grail of Animal Mass Suicides would be? ---
**Author:** ![Ponder\_Stibbons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponder_stibbons/32/343_2.png) [@Ponder\_Stibbons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponder_Stibbons)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2008, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cattle-mutes/433034/8 "2008-01-11T15:35:50Z")
[QUOTE=AskNott] We have seen an overuse and dilution of the phrase “Holy Grail of” in recent years. This really takes the cake. When there’s a Holy Grail of cattle mute investigations, Holy Grail finally has no meaning at all. Stop it. Find some other poor defenseless phrase to drag around. I’m not even Catholic, but I am gacked when I have the mental picture of a Grail full of decaying cattle anuses and blowfly maggots. Drinking the blood of a holy man is bizarre enough! No maggots in the holy blood, okay? Sheesh. [/QUOTE] There, my friends, is the Holy Grail of Trite Phrase Rants. ---
**Author:** ![Alan\_Smithee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/2acd7d/32.png) [@Alan\_Smithee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alan_Smithee)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2008, 4:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cattle-mutes/433034/9 "2008-01-12T04:06:53Z")
[QUOTE=AskNott] We have seen an overuse and dilution of the phrase “Holy Grail of” in recent years. This really takes the cake. When there’s a Holy Grail of cattle mute investigations, Holy Grail finally has no meaning at all. Stop it. Find some other poor defenseless phrase to drag around. I’m not even Catholic, but I am gacked when I have the mental picture of a Grail full of decaying cattle anuses and blowfly maggots. Drinking the blood of a holy man is bizarre enough! No maggots in the holy blood, okay? Sheesh. [/QUOTE] I thought he was saying Wolverton was hard to find and probably made up. ---
**Author:** ![dogbutler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dogbutler/32/428_2.png) [@dogbutler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dogbutler)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2008, 12:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cattle-mutes/433034/10 "2008-01-12T12:18:34Z")
[QUOTE=vison] Holy cats. Is this still around? I thought we’d moved on to da Vinci or 9/11 Scholars for Truth, or something. _sigh_ [/QUOTE] Is zombie da Vinci mutilating cattle again? ---
**Author:** ![HMS\_Irruncible](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hms_irruncible/32/7394_2.png) [@HMS\_Irruncible](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HMS_Irruncible)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2008, 2:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cattle-mutes/433034/11 "2008-01-12T14:07:04Z")
- So, how’s my girl Bessie today? - … - Dumb cow. ---
**Author:** ![AskNott](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asknott/32/5790_2.png) [@AskNott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AskNott)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2008, 2:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cattle-mutes/433034/12 "2008-01-12T14:39:39Z")
[QUOTE=Alan Smithee] I thought he was saying Wolverton was hard to find and probably made up. [/QUOTE] This might be the finest post to username match in the past 12 months. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![whistlepig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/73ab20/32.png) [@whistlepig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/whistlepig)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2008, 1:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cattle-mutes/433034/13 "2008-01-14T01:25:05Z")
[QUOTE=James R. Leming] In reference to your one rule: “Don’t be a jerk”, how can you print such meaningless drivel concerning mutes without going to the source? The source I am referring to would be the ‘Holy Grail’ of mute investigators, Capt. Keith Wolverton, of the Cascade County Sheriff’s Office in Great Falls, Montana. [/QUOTE] I had to laugh - Great Falls is the home of the Montana School for the Deaf and Blind. “Mutes” is an old term for the deaf. Bad, bad spelling error. ---
**Author:** ![John\_W.Kennedy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_w.kennedy/32/1031_2.png) [@John\_W.Kennedy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_W.Kennedy)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2008, 11:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cattle-mutes/433034/14 "2008-01-14T23:08:56Z")
[QUOTE=whistlepig] I had to laugh - Great Falls is the home of the Montana School for the Deaf and Blind. “Mutes” is an old term for the deaf. [/quote] Not precisely. A “mute” is anyone who can’t (or doesn’t) speak, whether it’s a character in an opera with nothing to say, someone with no vocal apparatus, or someone who has never learned to speak. Those who are born deaf have, historically, represented a large portion of those who are mute, but the two words do not mean the same thing, and one can be either without being the other. [QUOTE=whistlepig] Bad, bad spelling error. [/QUOTE] Not a spelling error, just an unusually stupid piece of slang. ---
**Author:** ![naita](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/naita/32/5862_2.png) [@naita](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/naita)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2008, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cattle-mutes/433034/15 "2008-01-16T19:28:13Z")
Am I the only one who feels this thread should have been about cow barn noise reduction? ---
**Author:** ![OneCentStamp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/13edae/32.png) [@OneCentStamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneCentStamp)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2008, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cattle-mutes/433034/16 "2008-01-16T19:41:16Z")
Ugg. Googling “James R. Leming” leads to about ten pages on UFO cover-ups. They make my brain hurt as it shrinks and pulls away from my skull. ---
**Author:** ![Baldwin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/baldwin/32/7264_2.png) [@Baldwin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baldwin)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2008, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cattle-mutes/433034/17 "2008-01-16T20:05:09Z")
[QUOTE=James R. Leming] Have a care before you declare… James R. Leming Issaquah, WA [/QUOTE] What a surprise that you’ve made exactly one post on the SDMB. I was looking forward to your unassailable documentation. ---
**Author:** ![Ponderoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponderoid/32/19221_2.png) [@Ponderoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponderoid)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2008, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cattle-mutes/433034/18 "2008-01-16T23:39:58Z")
[QUOTE=Alan Smithee] I thought he was saying Wolverton was hard to find and probably made up. [/QUOTE] [QUOTE=AskNott] This might be the finest post to username match in the past 12 months. 😃 [/QUOTE] [QUOTE=Cosmic Relief] - So, how’s my girl Bessie today? - … - Dumb cow. [/QUOTE] That one was pretty good too. 😃 \*\*\* Ponder