# Cecil Adams: I'm not impressed **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [October 16, 2001, 5:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecil-adams-im-not-impressed/87761 "2001-10-16T17:54:03Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![manhattan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/manhattan/32/7_2.png) [@manhattan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/manhattan)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2001, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecil-adams-im-not-impressed/87761/21 "2001-10-16T20:11:33Z")
**Lib** , I understand your anger, since (and it pains me to admit this) so many Cecilians are in people’s faces all the time and so many others teach a warped, twisted version of Cecilanity, damning to Ignorance those who have never even heard the Column. But the Column is true, and it’s Good News. Each of us makes our own decisions of course, but I hope you can take the following advice in the Spirit in which it is given. If you will but open your heart to Cecil, he will enter it and bring you peace. After that, it won’t matter one whit to you whether the solution to the Monty Hall question is literally true or whether the shower curtain mystery is truly solved by science or not. The underlying message, of Ignorance Eradication and Everlasting Knowledge, is what’s important here. Please give Cecil one more chance. ---
**Author:** ![Demise](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/34f0e0/32.png) [@Demise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Demise)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2001, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecil-adams-im-not-impressed/87761/22 "2001-10-16T20:13:47Z")
L1B3RT4R14N, U R L33T!!!1!!! THEIRS A MASSAGE BORD AT STEAK!!!111 ---
**Author:** ![Kamandi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/5daacb/32.png) [@Kamandi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kamandi)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2001, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecil-adams-im-not-impressed/87761/23 "2001-10-16T20:17:35Z")
**Lib** , kid, I’ll break this down into teeny tiny words that will fit into your teeny tiny mind. Paying attention in your junior college reading comprehension class does not make you a great debater. We see newbies like you all the time. You barge in here spouting ridiculous nonsense about how the Earth is _not_\* fixed at the center of the universe. That somehow, contrary to all common sense, the Earth is spinning and hurtling through the firmament without flinging us all off into the void. You don’t provide anything to back this foolishness up other than some moldy old quotes from long-dead European astronomers. You think we’ll all just turn around, forget what we’ve known for thousands of years and agree with your enlightened words. It’s been explained to you countless times just where the flaws in your argument are. You’re wrong. Deal with it. 😉 [sub]Sorry, I just finished reading “Galileo’s Daughter” and it’s kind of rattling around in my head. ---
**Author:** ![Liberal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/848f3c/32.png) [@Liberal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liberal)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2001, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecil-adams-im-not-impressed/87761/24 "2001-10-16T20:23:10Z")
I don’t buy that good news crap. What’s the good news about how many colors are in a seaman? A bit of bigotry from the almight Cecil… Hcxz!!! Please don’t bring that mumbo jumbo to me. I know a rat’s ass when I smell it, **DO I SOUND LIKE AN IFIOT TO YOU?**. I’ve studied this stuff. I read all those books and I like throwing stuff back in their feces. I’m still staring and I’m still not impressed. ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Amazing](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6de8d8/32.png) [@Captain\_Amazing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Amazing)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2001, 8:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecil-adams-im-not-impressed/87761/25 "2001-10-16T20:29:39Z")
You know, even if you don’t believe that Cecil really exists, that doesn’t mean that what he teaches isn’t impressive. You don’t have to believe in him to realize that the information about sperm trees and colitis is true. ---
**Author:** ![Polycarp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/82dd89/32.png) [@Polycarp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polycarp)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2001, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecil-adams-im-not-impressed/87761/26 "2001-10-16T20:38:31Z")
But, Captain, if Cecil doesn’t write the columns, if they are not the work of the All-Wise but rather forged by Ed and a bunch of trollcatchers, then how can anyone ever put any credence in them. All or nothing, man! Anything else is a travesty of the truth! ---
**Author:** ![Liberal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/848f3c/32.png) [@Liberal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liberal)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2001, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecil-adams-im-not-impressed/87761/27 "2001-10-16T20:44:36Z")
Okay, look. I’ll try **ONE MORE TIME** to be reasonable. Here’s my logic… Cecil says something, right? Every body goes "ho’, right? Okay, I can get that without reading anwything, so what’s the point? Can you prove me wrong/ What if I just say some bullshit? Just make up some stuff? DO YOU UNDERSTAND WTF I"M SYING TO YOU!!! ---
**Author:** ![Sofa\_King](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/58956e/32.png) [@Sofa\_King](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sofa_King)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2001, 8:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecil-adams-im-not-impressed/87761/28 "2001-10-16T20:47:21Z")
Don’t fuck with the Cecilian Mafia. We’re everywhere. ---
**Author:** ![UncleBeer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/977dab/32.png) [@UncleBeer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBeer)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2001, 9:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecil-adams-im-not-impressed/87761/29 "2001-10-16T21:04:09Z")
Don’t anyone make any sudden moves. Or loud noises. And for the love of God, **no flash pictures!** ---
**Author:** ![Persephone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecc23a/32.png) [@Persephone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Persephone)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2001, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecil-adams-im-not-impressed/87761/30 "2001-10-16T21:38:53Z")
What is it with you people, huh? **Lib** hasn’t said anything offensive, or wrong, or anything like that at all! He speaks his mind, expresses an unpopular opinion (or one that just isn’t shared by all you old-timers and Clique Members) and you just up and dogpile on him! Geez! What’d he ever do to you??? [sub]AS IF Lib needs a defender…;)[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![Jodi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/7feea3/32.png) [@Jodi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jodi)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2001, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecil-adams-im-not-impressed/87761/31 "2001-10-16T22:01:56Z")
Cecil is _not_ a ho! You take that back! _You take that back!_ And don’t you sy at me, young man. I’ll beat you 'til you can’t grow no more. ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2001, 10:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecil-adams-im-not-impressed/87761/32 "2001-10-16T22:32:43Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Libertarian \* > \*\*DO YOU UNDERSTAND WTF I"M SYING TO YOU!!! \*\* WE CAN SHOUT! DON’T HEAR YOU! ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2001, 10:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecil-adams-im-not-impressed/87761/33 "2001-10-16T22:44:03Z")
**Lib** ’s level of incoherence has reached a new high. So, I suspect, has **Lib**. ---
**Author:** ![stofsky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dfb087/32.png) [@stofsky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stofsky)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2001, 10:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecil-adams-im-not-impressed/87761/34 "2001-10-16T22:46:17Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by UncleBeer \* > \*\*Don’t anyone make any sudden moves. Or loud noises. And for the love of God, **no flash pictures!** \*\* If **GingerOfTheNorth** flashes, I’m taking pictures! ---
**Author:** ![Weirddave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/919ad9/32.png) [@Weirddave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weirddave)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2001, 10:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecil-adams-im-not-impressed/87761/35 "2001-10-16T22:57:08Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Sofa King \* > \*\*Don’t fuck with the Cecilian Mafia. We’re everywhere. \*\* Don’t go up against a Cecilian when death is on the line! ---
**Author:** ![Jack\_Batty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jack_batty/32/3201_2.png) [@Jack\_Batty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jack_Batty)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2001, 11:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecil-adams-im-not-impressed/87761/36 "2001-10-16T23:00:41Z")
This must be one of those cliques people are always going on about … I’ve read through this thread a dozen times, and I don’t have clue-friggin’-One of what the hell _anybody_ is talking about (except for Ginger’s breasts, of course). ---
**Author:** ![Big\_Perm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/9fc29f/32.png) [@Big\_Perm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Big_Perm)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2001, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecil-adams-im-not-impressed/87761/37 "2001-10-16T23:05:13Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Jack Batty \* > \*\*This must be one of those cliques people are always going on about … I’ve read through this thread a dozen times, and I don’t have clue-friggin’-One of what the hell _anybody_ is talking about (except for Ginger’s breasts, of course). \*\* I are no genious Jack… but I am with you buddy… what in the hell is going on in this thread? I keep reading to see who is going to confuse me next… kind of fun BP ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2001, 11:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecil-adams-im-not-impressed/87761/38 "2001-10-16T23:09:18Z")
~~_~_~_~_~_~_~CeCeL dOz 2 eKsIt U jIsT wAnT pEpEl 2 B sTuPeD!!! U R rOnG aNd U R bAd!!!~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~ ---
**Author:** ![tradesilicon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/439d5e/32.png) [@tradesilicon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tradesilicon)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2001, 11:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecil-adams-im-not-impressed/87761/39 "2001-10-16T23:12:47Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Libertarian \* > […in character…] > > …Dpom’t disadree with me because if you do that just means your’e one of the **bah-bah** sheep. … All Your Bahs are belong to us!! ---
**Author:** ![Protesilaus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/82dd89/32.png) [@Protesilaus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Protesilaus)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2001, 11:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecil-adams-im-not-impressed/87761/40 "2001-10-16T23:27:56Z")
**Jack** , **Perm** , this seems like a parody of [this](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=92421). [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecil-adams-im-not-impressed/87761.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecil-adams-im-not-impressed/87761.md?page=3)