# Cecil's IQ **URL:** \ **Category:** Cecil's Columns/Staff Reports\ **Created:** [March 27, 2003, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecils-iq/164532 "2003-03-27T15:13:05Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![gyt\_fx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/74df32/32.png) [@gyt\_fx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gyt_fx)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2003, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecils-iq/164532/1 "2003-03-27T15:13:05Z")
Well it is no doubt that Cecil is quite an inteligent one, if not the most. But what is his IQ? And how old is Cecil. Just wondering… ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2003, 3:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecils-iq/164532/2 "2003-03-27T15:19:28Z")
1/0 ? ---
**Author:** ![Duck\_Duck\_Goose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/50afbb/32.png) [@Duck\_Duck\_Goose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duck_Duck_Goose)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2003, 3:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecils-iq/164532/3 "2003-03-27T15:20:41Z")
Since he is the Perfect Master, his IQ is a Perfect Number. Three guesses as to whether it’s 6, 28 or 496. His age, ditto. [http://pachome1.pacific.net.sg/~novelway/MEW2/lesson1.html](http://pachome1.pacific.net.sg/~novelway/MEW2/lesson1.html) ---
**Author:** ![Lucki\_Chaarms](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/9de0a6/32.png) [@Lucki\_Chaarms](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lucki_Chaarms)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2003, 3:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecils-iq/164532/4 "2003-03-27T15:21:29Z")
Bad news, dude. Cecil Adams is just a name that belongs to the Chicago reader, which refers to no actual person. The Gods only know who writes the damned things… I assume they fall from the sky somewhere, and the Reader staff collects them. Cite: [http://tess2.uspto.gov/bin/showfield?f=doc&state=3ehlr4.2.1](http://tess2.uspto.gov/bin/showfield?f=doc&state=3ehlr4.2.1) (That is a US Patent and Trademark Office document) LC ---
**Author:** ![Jayrot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Jayrot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jayrot)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2003, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecils-iq/164532/5 "2003-03-27T15:26:53Z")
If Cecil actually is a real person, (BIG IF) his IQ isn’t necessarily so high. As I understand it, most questions are answered with a substantial amount of research and help. It’s not as though he’s answering these questions on the spot. Whereas he is certainly intelligent (the level of humor reflects this), I might not bet on him on Jeopardy! However, give him a library, a phone line, and a net connection… ---
**Author:** ![Phlosphr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c68b51/32.png) [@Phlosphr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Phlosphr)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2003, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecils-iq/164532/6 "2003-03-27T15:31:02Z")
**Lucky Charms** That was mean. from cite… > [@](#): > > CECIL ADAMS DOES NOT IDENTIFY ANY PARTICULAR INDIVIDUAL BUT WAS DEVISED AS A FANCIFUL NAME And the abandonment date was March 29, 1989 Kinda eery that it was 14 years and 2 days ago… ---
**Author:** ![gyt\_fx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/74df32/32.png) [@gyt\_fx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gyt_fx)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2003, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecils-iq/164532/7 "2003-03-27T15:31:19Z")
Understood Jayrot, it is mostly by research. But ot Lucki Chaarms, are All of the SDstaff members fictional? For instance Dex, and some others that i cant think of now ---
**Author:** ![Duck\_Duck\_Goose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/50afbb/32.png) [@Duck\_Duck\_Goose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duck_Duck_Goose)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2003, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecils-iq/164532/8 "2003-03-27T15:58:52Z")
Gyt FX, the Straight Dope is that while Cecil Adams may or may not be a pen name for an actual person who has been writing a column known as “The Straight Dope” ever since 1973, all the other folks are quite definitely real people, Dex and so forth. We know this is true because many of us have attended drunken naked Jello orgies known as “DopeFests” and have met these people in person. Well, okay, I lied about the Jello, but… Anyway, we do have DopeFests and we do meet each other IRL. CK Dexter Haven and Bibliophage and other Staff Members are “fictional” the same way you, “Gyt Fx”, are “fictional”. Those are their usernames, their “nicks”, their “handles”. Do a Search on “dopefest” in MPSIMS and read some of the chronicles of yore, many with linked photos of the carnage. ---
**Author:** ![cornflakes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9d8465/32.png) [@cornflakes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cornflakes)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2003, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecils-iq/164532/9 "2003-03-27T16:32:40Z")
_sigh_ And to think that this was once a well-respected board… Yes, **gyt\_fx** , there is a Cecil Adams. He exists as certainly as ignorance and the will to fight it exist, and you know that they abound and give your life its greatest aggravation and most heartfelt joy. No Cecil Adams! Thank God! he lives and his I.Q. is immeasurable. A thousand points on a Stanford-Binet, **gyt\_fx** , nay 10 times 10,000 points would only begin to measure his intelligence in the hearts of Dopers. ---
**Author:** ![cornflakes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9d8465/32.png) [@cornflakes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cornflakes)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2003, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecils-iq/164532/10 "2003-03-27T16:45:11Z")
> [@](#): > > _sigh_ And to think that this was once a well-respected board… Please, no offense to the board or anyone here. It’s just that I remember one of the first times that somebody asked in GQ if Cecil is real. The thread was twenty-something replies long before somebody dared to mention that he looked a little like Ed Zotti. ---
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2003, 5:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecils-iq/164532/11 "2003-03-27T17:24:26Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by cornflakes \* > \*\*Please, no offense to the board or anyone here. It’s just that I remember one of the first times that somebody asked in GQ if Cecil is real. The thread was twenty-something replies long before somebody dared to mention that he looked a little like Ed Zotti. \*\* Many speculate that **Ed Zotti** was actually created from Cecil’s DNA. Not sure how they got some, but my personal theory involves a cotton swab, a bottle of Jergen’s lotion, a National Geographic magazine and a recently used tissue. Let’s speak no more of this. ---
**Author:** ![Rusalka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ecd19e/32.png) [@Rusalka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rusalka)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2003, 5:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecils-iq/164532/12 "2003-03-28T05:06:19Z")
Ed Zotti looks too young to have been Cecil for all these years… ---
**Author:** ![gyt\_fx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/74df32/32.png) [@gyt\_fx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gyt_fx)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2003, 5:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecils-iq/164532/13 "2003-03-28T05:13:52Z")
Ok, I snooped the net a bit about cecil and ed Zotti. [http://www.ipass.net/~whitetho/edcecil.htm](http://www.ipass.net/~whitetho/edcecil.htm) Shows a side-by-side comparison of the ‘two.’ Is that Really Cecil? And who is Ed anyway? I closely looked at the picture and ‘cecil’ and ed look like the exact same person, i kid you not. Hair, glasses, slightly almost dimples, spot beneath the chin… not saying its a double chin or anything. Could someone clarify? ---
**Author:** ![I\_can\_t\_believe\_that\_s\_butter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/8edcca/32.png) [@I\_can\_t\_believe\_that\_s\_butter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/I_can_t_believe_that_s_butter)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2003, 5:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecils-iq/164532/14 "2003-03-28T05:59:37Z")
You mean the site referenced in the Straight Dope FAQ? [http://www.straightdope.com/faq/index.html#faq](http://www.straightdope.com/faq/index.html#faq) ---
**Author:** ![istara](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/e79b87/32.png) [@istara](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/istara)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2003, 8:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecils-iq/164532/15 "2003-03-28T08:37:07Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Rusalka \* > \*\*Ed Zotti looks too young to have been Cecil for all these years… \*\* IIRC there has been more than one Cecil. The first one may have passed away, if memory serves. ---
**Author:** ![Achernar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e274bd/32.png) [@Achernar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Achernar)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2003, 8:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecils-iq/164532/16 "2003-03-28T08:52:08Z")
**gyt\_fx** : read the page you linked to. It says that what you have there is two images of Ed Zotti. ---
**Author:** ![whitetho](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/whitetho/32/1059_2.png) [@whitetho](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/whitetho)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2003, 10:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecils-iq/164532/17 "2003-03-28T10:47:36Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by gyt\_fx \* > \*\*Ok, I snooped the net a bit about cecil and ed Zotti. [http://www.ipass.net/~whitetho/edcecil.htm](http://www.ipass.net/~whitetho/edcecil.htm) Shows a side-by-side comparison of the ‘two.’ Is that Really Cecil? And who is Ed anyway? I closely looked at the picture and ‘cecil’ and ed look like the exact same person, i kid you not. Hair, glasses, slightly almost dimples, spot beneath the chin… not saying its a double chin or anything. > Could someone clarify? \*\* I actually put that page up even before this message board existed, in order to answer a question on the alt.fan.cecil-adams USENET group. It was designed to refute the claims of various heretics, backsliders, and secret followers of Marilyn Vos Savant who suggest that Uncle Cecil is merely a puppet controlled by Little Ed. (By the way, Ed Zotti _loves_ it when people say that it is _he_ who is “the world’s smartest human being”.) > [@](#): > > IIRC there has been more than one Cecil. The first one may have passed away, if memory serves. Cecil has had three _editors_ over the years – Mike Lanehan, Mike Kehr, and, for the last quarter-century, Ed Zotti. Lenehan is currently a big-wig with the _Chicago Reader_ and has even posted here a handful of times – there is a bio of him at [Lenehan](http://www.aan.org/gbase/Aan/viewPerson?oid=oid%3A224) – note the devilish grin of the man apparently responsible for springing Uncle Cecil on an unsuspecting but gladdened world. ---
**Author:** ![gyt\_fx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/74df32/32.png) [@gyt\_fx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gyt_fx)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2003, 3:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecils-iq/164532/18 "2003-03-28T15:07:02Z")
Ok, are there any photos of Cecil ANYWHERE?!? And as we drift away from the general point… What is Cecil’s IQ? ---
**Author:** ![whitetho](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/whitetho/32/1059_2.png) [@whitetho](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/whitetho)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2003, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecils-iq/164532/19 "2003-03-28T15:30:39Z")
From the back cover of _Triumph of the Straight Dope_: **What is Cecil Adams’s IQ?** “Do you want it in scientific notation? Little Ed, get out the slide rule.”–Cecil Adams ---
**Author:** ![Duckster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/duckster/32/1244_2.png) [@Duckster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duckster)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2003, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecils-iq/164532/20 "2003-03-28T15:57:06Z")
"Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus. “He exists as certainly as love and generosity and devotion exist, and you know that they abound and give to your life its highest beauty and joy. Alas! how dreary would be the world if there were no Santa Claus! It would be as dreary as if there were no Virginias. There would be no childlike faith then, no poetry, no romance to make tolerable this existence. We should have no enjoyment, except in sense and sight. The external light with which childhood fills the world would be extinguished.” Ah, hold on a sec … Wrong file. Carry on. :smack: [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cecils-iq/164532.md?page=2)