# Celebrity hotties that aren't particularly hot **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [November 21, 2011, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-hotties-that-arent-particularly-hot/603661 "2011-11-21T17:28:41Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Jaledin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Jaledin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jaledin)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 1:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-hotties-that-arent-particularly-hot/603661/81 "2011-11-23T01:03:11Z")
Cindy Crawford. Sandra Bullock (touted as "one of the most desirable women in the world on some show of his). That woman who played the “mom” on that show with the little smartass, Alexis Bleidel (?) – not that hot. Disclaimer: I’d probably get all up in their crotches IRL, but not something I spend long winter evenings thinking about. I’d probably do a woman dressed as one of her furry friends if I was drunk, so it doesn’t mean anything. My hands are good – strong fingers, permanently shaped into little claw shapes from playing pianop – but I’d be embarrassed to finger some nice girl’s dad with those fingers, even though they are talented and pretty. ---
**Author:** ![salinqmind](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3ec8ea/32.png) [@salinqmind](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/salinqmind)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 1:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-hotties-that-arent-particularly-hot/603661/82 "2011-11-23T01:16:51Z")
Jennifer Aniston, YES! She is the poster girl for this thread. Utterly ordinary. As is Evangeline Lily from ‘Lost’. ---
**Author:** ![Horatio\_Hellpop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Horatio\_Hellpop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horatio_Hellpop)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 1:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-hotties-that-arent-particularly-hot/603661/83 "2011-11-23T01:24:30Z")
> [@MadTheSwine](#): > > Andie MacDowell She always looked to me like a Mort Drucker drawing of an attractive woman. ---
**Author:** ![Horatio\_Hellpop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Horatio\_Hellpop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horatio_Hellpop)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 1:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-hotties-that-arent-particularly-hot/603661/84 "2011-11-23T01:29:48Z")
> [@Jaledin](#): > > No to Alyson Hannigan and the chick who plays Robin on that show I’ve seen a few times (also saw all of Buffy a few months ago, not even aww, isn’t that cute in that one). She is pretty cute, though, and I’d absolutely fuck her. Not the first four on my list, though, definitely not. I get Alyson Hannigan. She’s what I’d call “believably gorgeous”: plain enough that you believe she’s the character she’s playing but pretty enough that you can’t look away from her. Gillian Anderson is another of these. ---
**Author:** ![fachverwirrt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/94ad74/32.png) [@fachverwirrt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fachverwirrt)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 1:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-hotties-that-arent-particularly-hot/603661/85 "2011-11-23T01:31:07Z")
> [@Maserschmidt](#): > > She’s been cast as Snow White, which means the mirror has to claim she’s the hottest woman in the land. Or fairest, anyway. Maybe it’s a land of particularly ugly people. ---
**Author:** ![bahia\_hombre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@bahia\_hombre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bahia_hombre)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 3:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-hotties-that-arent-particularly-hot/603661/86 "2011-11-23T03:35:12Z")
Jennifer Lopez (kinda nondescript face) Mariah Carey (cute enough for a singer, wouldn’t pass a screen test) ---
**Author:** ![Spoke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a88e57/32.png) [@Spoke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoke)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 4:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-hotties-that-arent-particularly-hot/603661/87 "2011-11-23T04:23:13Z")
> [@fachverwirrt](#): > > Maybe it’s a land of particularly ugly people. Well Charlize Theron plays the wicked witch, so there you go. ---
**Author:** ![bump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7c8e57/32.png) [@bump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bump)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 4:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-hotties-that-arent-particularly-hot/603661/88 "2011-11-23T04:44:43Z")
> [@psiekier](#): > > Here in Dallas/Fort Worth, Texas, there’s a classic rock radio station (92.5) with a a funny morning show. Bo (Roberts) and Jim (White) have a producer (Randy) that they frequently involve in their morning hijinks, I thought I was the only non-moronic listener of their show! Nice to know that I’m not the only one. Anyway, of the celebrities pushed as “hot”, I have to say that Taylor Swift and Miley Cyrus are two that I just don’t get. Neither is particularly hot, and really the only big thing either have going for them other than singing talent(?) is the tight teenage bods. ---
**Author:** ![RickJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bb73d2/32.png) [@RickJay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RickJay)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 6:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-hotties-that-arent-particularly-hot/603661/89 "2011-11-23T06:24:10Z")
> [@VinylTurnip](#): > > She often looks mildly greasy, which from a practical standpoint I guess could be useful, but the dead-eyed RealDoll stare kills it for me. I’d never seen anything with Megan Fox in it but always got the same impression; from still photos she didn’t look pretty, she looked smelly and sweaty and basically like a porn star, which isn’t hot. Then a few months ago I watched about ten minutes of “Transformers,” specifically one part where she is talking with the parents of Shia LaBEef’s character, and actually saw her move and talk and was struck by how attractive she was when in the context of actually acting like a normal human. ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 9:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-hotties-that-arent-particularly-hot/603661/90 "2011-11-23T09:28:55Z")
> [@silenus](#): > > You have **got** to be joking! Nope. > [@](#): > > Gina Torres isn’t even _remotely_ hot. I beg to differ. She is smoking. > [@](#): > > Whereas Jewel Staite defines hotty hot hot. Cute =/= hot. ---
**Author:** ![foolsguinea](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foolsguinea/32/14751_2.png) [@foolsguinea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/foolsguinea)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 9:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-hotties-that-arent-particularly-hot/603661/91 "2011-11-23T09:37:53Z")
Jonny Hamm used to be pretty cute, though. ---
**Author:** ![GovernmentMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e9c0ed/32.png) [@GovernmentMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GovernmentMan)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 11:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-hotties-that-arent-particularly-hot/603661/92 "2011-11-23T11:15:34Z")
Taylor Swift. I don’t get it. Her nose and eyes are weird. She has a pig-face. ---
**Author:** ![Ephemera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8baadc/32.png) [@Ephemera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ephemera)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-hotties-that-arent-particularly-hot/603661/93 "2011-11-23T16:04:03Z")
> [@silenus](#): > > You have **got** to be joking! Gina Torres isn’t even _remotely_ hot. Whereas Jewel Staite defines hotty hot hot. Jewel (and Summer) are cute. Gina (and Morena) are hot. ---
**Author:** ![PunditLisa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/4af34b/32.png) [@PunditLisa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PunditLisa)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-hotties-that-arent-particularly-hot/603661/94 "2011-11-23T17:32:50Z")
Cosmetic/hair companies have come out with some odd choices on their spokesmodels lately: \*\* Drew Barrymore \*\* is cute, but hardly hot. \*\*Taylor Swift \*\* is downright homely, IMO. \*\* Sara Jessica Parker \*\*has already been talked about. Then we have **Gwyneth Paltrow** , who replaced the drop dead gorgeous Elizabeth Hurley as the Estee Lauder model. Paltrow is like vanilla ice cream. Boooring. Of course, Cover Girl gave us “supermodel” **Cindy Crawford** , too. While I like that she’s not stick thin, I actually find her to be masculine looking. Agree about **Julia Roberts**. Horse face. Also agree about **Hugh Jackman**. After seeing him host the Oscars, I think I’d enjoy pounding back some beers with him, but there is something very odd about his looks that turns me off. **Celebrities who aren’t hot but are:** **Justin Timberlake**. He looks like a squirrel with a perm. But, he’s talented. And he can dance. And act. But, best of all, he has a kindness and sense of humor that I find adorable. **Tim McGraw** : 100% of his sex appeal is in his cowboy hat. On, and he’s delicious. Off, and you wonder if you’ve lost your mind because there’s nothing cute about him. How can that be? Would it be different if he shaved his hair off? ---
**Author:** ![salinqmind](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3ec8ea/32.png) [@salinqmind](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/salinqmind)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-hotties-that-arent-particularly-hot/603661/95 "2011-11-23T18:31:02Z")
Tim McGraw - right you are! With the hat - pretty hot! Without the hat - he looks like the pastor of a small church in the mid-West. I have to disagree that Scarlett Johannson is cute (and I have a mild girl-crush on her) - ‘cute’ to me is appealing, bright and peppy, like Sally Field. Ms. Johannson has that inaccessible, vacant look that is more on the ‘glamour’ side. I nominate Taylor Lautner (the werewolf kid in Twilight). I don’t get it. He looks like the high school football hero who is nonetheless kept after class to work on his reading skillz. All those Twi-hards might swoon over his torso, but he suffers from butterface. sorry. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_other_waldo_pepper/32/12370_2.png) [@The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Other_Waldo_Pepper)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-hotties-that-arent-particularly-hot/603661/96 "2011-11-23T18:35:56Z")
> [@PunditLisa](#): > > Of course, Cover Girl gave us “supermodel” **Cindy Crawford** , too. While I like that she’s not stick thin, I actually find her to be masculine looking. If [this](http://www.myhotsexygirls.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/04/Cindy-Crawford-7.jpg) is masculine, then I’m suddenly out of a closet I didn’t know I was in. ---
**Author:** ![PunditLisa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/4af34b/32.png) [@PunditLisa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PunditLisa)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-hotties-that-arent-particularly-hot/603661/97 "2011-11-23T18:46:42Z")
> [@The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](#): > > If [this](http://www.myhotsexygirls.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/04/Cindy-Crawford-7.jpg) is masculine, then I’m suddenly out of a closet I didn’t know I was in. Hint: Look at her FACE. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_other_waldo_pepper/32/12370_2.png) [@The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Other_Waldo_Pepper)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 6:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-hotties-that-arent-particularly-hot/603661/98 "2011-11-23T18:47:30Z")
> [@PunditLisa](#): > > Hint: Look at her FACE. 🙂 Why would I start now? ---
**Author:** ![bup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6bbea6/32.png) [@bup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bup)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-hotties-that-arent-particularly-hot/603661/99 "2011-11-23T19:16:12Z")
> [@PunditLisa](#): > > \*\*Taylor Swift \*\* is downright homely, IMO. You’d be an absolute failure as a lesbian or a straight man. Cindy Crawford is masculine, and [this](http://www.teenidols4you.com/blink/Actors/taylor_swift/taylor_swift_1291298171.jpg) is homely? ---
**Author:** ![GovernmentMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e9c0ed/32.png) [@GovernmentMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GovernmentMan)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 7:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-hotties-that-arent-particularly-hot/603661/100 "2011-11-23T19:35:26Z")
> [@bup](#): > > You’d be an absolute failure as a lesbian or a straight man. > > Cindy Crawford is masculine, and [this](http://www.teenidols4you.com/blink/Actors/taylor_swift/taylor_swift_1291298171.jpg) is homely? She’s homely brah. [http://robotceleb.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/05/taylor-swift-billboard-music-awards.jpg](http://robotceleb.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/05/taylor-swift-billboard-music-awards.jpg) From her videos and tv appearances, I’ve always thought she was really plain, and it wasn’t until I google image’d her that I realized how downright ugly she looks in most photos. Again, pig-face (which is more readily apparent when she was chubby like in her younger years) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-hotties-that-arent-particularly-hot/603661.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-hotties-that-arent-particularly-hot/603661.md?page=6)