# Celebrity Matchmaker **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 14, 2000, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-matchmaker/13820 "2000-02-14T16:32:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Gazelle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b4bc9f/32.png) [@Gazelle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gazelle)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2000, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-matchmaker/13820/1 "2000-02-14T16:32:00Z")
For those seeking a male celebrity: [http://www.emode.com/tests/celebrity.html](http://www.emode.com/tests/celebrity.html) For those seeking a female celebrity: [http://www.emode.com/tests/celebrity\_men.html](http://www.emode.com/tests/celebrity_men.html) I am now heading to the roof of my building to prepare for oblivion. I’ve been hooked up with Fabio! That’s right, the King of Dinnerplate-Sized Nipples. The horror. * * * You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you. ---
**Author:** ![BurnMeUp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/91b2a8/32.png) [@BurnMeUp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BurnMeUp)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2000, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-matchmaker/13820/2 "2000-02-14T16:36:00Z")
This thing is seriously flawed… I mean come on, me and Shnia Twain? I loathe country music. * * * You always use violence. I should’ve ordered glutinous rice chicken. ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2000, 4:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-matchmaker/13820/3 "2000-02-14T16:37:00Z")
I’ll trade you, Cant—I got Ricky Martin, a gay Ken doll! I never should have said I liked show tunes . . . ---
**Author:** ![Globe-trotter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/cab0a1/32.png) [@Globe-trotter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Globe-trotter)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2000, 4:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-matchmaker/13820/4 "2000-02-14T16:40:00Z")
Anybody want Danny De Vito?!? * * * “I thought: opera, how hard can it be? Songs. Pretty girls dancing. Nice scenery. Lots of people handing over cash. Got to be better than the cut-throat world of yoghurt, I thought.” - Seldom Bucket ---
**Author:** ![Mullinator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c2a13f/32.png) [@Mullinator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mullinator)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2000, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-matchmaker/13820/5 "2000-02-14T16:47:00Z")
Hmmm, Brandy Chastain. I may have to change some of those answeres away from sports. * * * Have you voted for your favorite, huggable Mullinator today? ---
**Author:** ![rubes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b782af/32.png) [@rubes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rubes)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2000, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-matchmaker/13820/6 "2000-02-14T16:49:00Z")
My match is Salma Hayek, but I don’t know who she is. She looks pretty, though. (rubes is a sucker for brunettes) ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2000, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-matchmaker/13820/7 "2000-02-14T17:10:00Z")
Hmmm… Heidi Klum. Looks good. I’ll trade her for Salma Hayek, though! * * * **Coldfire** * * * _ **"You know how complex women are"** _ - Neil Peart, **Rush** (1993) ---
**Author:** ![SwimmingRiddles](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/43a26b/32.png) [@SwimmingRiddles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SwimmingRiddles)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2000, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-matchmaker/13820/8 "2000-02-14T17:19:00Z")
Eve, I am your Ricky-Martin-matched sister. I had taken a “Is your boyfriend gay?” test on this site a while ago, but can’t seem to find it now. I suggest we run any prospective men though that screening process, given who we were matched with… * * * Habit rules the unreflecting herd. - Wordsworth ---
**Author:** ![Treycal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/839c29/32.png) [@Treycal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Treycal)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2000, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-matchmaker/13820/9 "2000-02-14T17:28:00Z")
The horror, the horror! I got Britney “No I didn’t get implants” Spears Think I’ll just go lie down in a dark quiet room and think about what on earth I said that mad them pick Britney for me. ---
**Author:** ![fuzzy-wuzzy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b38774/32.png) [@fuzzy-wuzzy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fuzzy-wuzzy)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2000, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-matchmaker/13820/10 "2000-02-14T17:37:00Z")
wooohoooo I got Harrison Ford…let’s go baby… * * * “Do or do not, there is no try” - Yoda - Senior Intern to El Presidente Self-Righteous Clique \* ---
**Author:** ![Ukulele\_Ike](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/df788c/32.png) [@Ukulele\_Ike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ukulele_Ike)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2000, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-matchmaker/13820/11 "2000-02-14T17:43:00Z")
I got Salma Hayek, too. Sounds great to me. Now, where do I go to pick her up? I couldn’t find the info on that website. * * * Uke ---
**Author:** ![Stevie\_Rave\_On](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c68b51/32.png) [@Stevie\_Rave\_On](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stevie_Rave_On)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2000, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-matchmaker/13820/12 "2000-02-14T17:44:00Z")
Jennifer Lopez. Hell Yeah! * * * Trying is the first step to failure ---
**Author:** ![Padeye](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a9a28c/32.png) [@Padeye](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Padeye)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2000, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-matchmaker/13820/13 "2000-02-14T17:46:00Z")
This thing _must_ be broken. I got Pamela Anderson Lee. (shudder) If the plastic bits aren’t bad enough she’s not even remotely pretty. It’s a gyp. I bet no combination of answers would result in Janeane Garofalo as a match. ---
**Author:** ![UncleBeer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/977dab/32.png) [@UncleBeer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBeer)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2000, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-matchmaker/13820/14 "2000-02-14T17:50:00Z")
I think I took the wrong test, I got Ricky Martin. Naw, I’m kidding. It selected Jennifer Anniston for me. ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2000, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-matchmaker/13820/15 "2000-02-14T17:52:00Z")
I got Shania Twain, too. Don’t get me wrong, she’s a fine-looking woman, but I’m not sure she’s right for me. ---
**Author:** ![Nu\_Vo\_Da\_Da](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/97f17d/32.png) [@Nu\_Vo\_Da\_Da](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nu_Vo_Da_Da)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2000, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-matchmaker/13820/16 "2000-02-14T17:59:00Z")
Lauryn Hill! can’t say I’m at all disappointed by that… ---
**Author:** ![sorrel554](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/91b2a8/32.png) [@sorrel554](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sorrel554)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2000, 6:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-matchmaker/13820/17 "2000-02-15T06:02:00Z")
According to my results, Will Smith is “destined to be” my “Fresh Prince.” Our dream date would be golfing followed by gettin’ jiggy on the dance floor. ?!?!?! ---
**Author:** ![Fretful\_Porpentine](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fretful_porpentine/32/2873_2.png) [@Fretful\_Porpentine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fretful_Porpentine)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2000, 6:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-matchmaker/13820/18 "2000-02-15T06:04:00Z")
Harrison Ford. Whoo hoo! ---
**Author:** ![Frankie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/258eb7/32.png) [@Frankie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frankie)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2000, 6:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-matchmaker/13820/19 "2000-02-15T06:22:00Z")
Hey Burn- Should we double team her?? Shes my ideal woman too! * * * -Frankie “Mother Mercy, can your loins bear fruit forever?/Is your fecundity a trammel or a treasure?” -Bad Religion ---
**Author:** ![Otto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Otto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Otto)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2000, 6:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-matchmaker/13820/20 "2000-02-15T06:38:00Z")
I got a rock. Oh wait, I got Ricky Martin. Oh wait, same thing. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celebrity-matchmaker/13820.md?page=2)