# Celibacy or How Long Have YOU Gone Without? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 23, 2011, 2:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celibacy-or-how-long-have-you-gone-without/597329 "2011-09-23T14:34:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![Ellecram](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ellecram/32/18948_2.png) [@Ellecram](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ellecram)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2018, 5:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celibacy-or-how-long-have-you-gone-without/597329/141 "2018-07-18T05:08:33Z")
Since 2004. I guess that would be nearly 14 years. Doesn’t bother me. I would like someone to hang out with sometime but that probably isn’t going to happen. ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2018, 10:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celibacy-or-how-long-have-you-gone-without/597329/142 "2018-08-10T10:51:20Z")
53 years, today. ---
**Author:** ![TokyoBayer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tokyobayer/32/13989_2.png) [@TokyoBayer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TokyoBayer)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2018, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celibacy-or-how-long-have-you-gone-without/597329/143 "2018-08-10T15:32:46Z")
About three years. I grew up Mormon and was active in the Church into my early 20s. However, I did have a non-Mormon girlfriend. Then I had a couple of Mormon girlfriends after that, which is where the three years comes in. After that, it was back to non-Mormon girlfriends, including the one who became my first wife. We were separated for several years before our divorce, but this was in Tokyo and it wasn’t too difficult to hook up with someone, so maybe a couple of weeks at the most. Since getting married again, it’s been OK, although the strain of having young kids can make it happen less often at times than when I was single. ---
**Author:** ![overlyverbose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/9dc877/32.png) [@overlyverbose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/overlyverbose)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2018, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celibacy-or-how-long-have-you-gone-without/597329/144 "2018-08-10T16:42:24Z")
I think around 1 year or so. With my husband, sometimes we’ll go a couple of months, which wasn’t quite what I expected when we first married. I hate that, but our schedules and our body clocks are so very different. He’s ready to go at 10 or 11 p.m., when I’m ready to sleep. I’m out of bed on the weekends by 7 latest, he sleeps until almost noon. Plus, he doesn’t shower at all on the weekends unless we have sex, and at that, it’s right before we have sex. And it takes _45 minutes_. I’ve asked him if he doesn’t mind showering in the morning or earlier in the day so we can get it on when we’re into it in the evening (darn kids…have to put them to bed), but he usually forgets, so by the time he’s showered, I’m scarcely awake, which can’t be exciting for him, either. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2018, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celibacy-or-how-long-have-you-gone-without/597329/145 "2018-08-10T16:47:49Z")
> [@overlyverbose](#): > > Plus, he doesn’t shower at all on the weekends unless we have sex, and at that, it’s right before we have sex. And it takes _45 minutes_. Now I’m all curious. Is it the _sex_ or the _shower_ that takes 45 minutes. And are you complaining or stealth-bragging?😃 ---
**Author:** ![overlyverbose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/9dc877/32.png) [@overlyverbose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/overlyverbose)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2018, 5:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celibacy-or-how-long-have-you-gone-without/597329/146 "2018-08-10T17:45:32Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > Now I’m all curious. Is it the _sex_ or the _shower_ that takes 45 minutes. And are you complaining or stealth-bragging?😃 Bahahaha. It’s the shower that takes 45 minutes - he shaves (which I appreciate but isn’t 100% necessary) and cleans up. It’s the shaving that really takes a while. I love that he’s considerate enough to clean up for me, but ugh, it is a buzzkill to get all hot and bothered only to have him run off and shower. He’s super excited, but I’m halfway asleep by the time he shows up again. We’d have sex IN the shower, but that just isn’t as appealing as it used to be. The amount of time it takes to have sex? Well, that’s a whole 'nother thread. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2018, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celibacy-or-how-long-have-you-gone-without/597329/147 "2018-08-10T17:59:19Z")
Thanks!! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Salem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8c91f0/32.png) [@Salem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Salem)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2018, 1:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celibacy-or-how-long-have-you-gone-without/597329/148 "2018-08-11T01:13:20Z")
Ironically, the 2-ish years were when I was married. Obviously, there were issues in the relationship and I was so angry and resentful that I wanted nothing to do with him physically. We ended up getting divorced. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2018, 1:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celibacy-or-how-long-have-you-gone-without/597329/149 "2018-08-11T01:28:54Z")
Probably seven or eight years now. Diabetes and meds suck. ::kicks can:: ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2018, 5:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celibacy-or-how-long-have-you-gone-without/597329/150 "2018-08-11T05:09:27Z")
> [@Robot\_Arm](#): > > 53 years, today. I thought someone might at least wish me a happy birthday. Tough room. ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2018, 5:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celibacy-or-how-long-have-you-gone-without/597329/151 "2018-08-11T05:16:31Z")
> [@Robot\_Arm](#): > > I thought someone might at least wish me a happy birthday. Tough room. Happy birthday! ---
**Author:** ![kambuckta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/53a042/32.png) [@kambuckta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kambuckta)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2018, 5:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celibacy-or-how-long-have-you-gone-without/597329/152 "2018-08-11T05:54:57Z")
> [@Robot\_Arm](#): > > I thought someone might at least wish me a happy birthday. Tough room. Happy Birthday dude. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Bullitt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bullitt/32/5725_2.png) [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2018, 6:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celibacy-or-how-long-have-you-gone-without/597329/153 "2018-08-11T06:31:31Z")
> [@Robot\_Arm](#): > > I thought someone might at least wish me a happy birthday. Tough room. Happy Birthday! ---
**Author:** ![Bullitt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bullitt/32/5725_2.png) [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2018, 6:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celibacy-or-how-long-have-you-gone-without/597329/154 "2018-08-11T06:35:59Z")
_Celibacy? Are you INSANE???_ At most it’s been a month or three, after my divorce and between girlfriends. I was never one for the quickee one night stands. I always was developing relationships. ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2018, 10:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celibacy-or-how-long-have-you-gone-without/597329/155 "2018-08-11T10:00:59Z")
> [@needscoffee](#): > > Happy birthday! > [@kambuckta](#): > > Happy Birthday dude. 😃 Thank you both. ---
**Author:** ![Leo\_Bloom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leo_bloom/32/10377_2.png) [@Leo\_Bloom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leo_Bloom)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2018, 2:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celibacy-or-how-long-have-you-gone-without/597329/156 "2018-08-11T14:20:07Z")
> [@perfectparanoia](#): > > Since I lost my virginity, I haven’t gone more than two weeks without. > > Even when I wasn’t in a relationship, I always had a FWB. 😕 “FWB”? ---
**Author:** ![Leo\_Bloom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leo_bloom/32/10377_2.png) [@Leo\_Bloom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leo_Bloom)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2018, 2:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celibacy-or-how-long-have-you-gone-without/597329/157 "2018-08-11T14:24:28Z")
> [@pohjonen](#): > > I came back to this because I had to come and post Jane Fonda’s comment that at 80 she no longer dates. She says, “I’ve closed up shop down there.” > > I had a going out of business closeout in about 1983. 🙂 I’ve been with 1000’s of men Again and again They sing the same tune They start with Byron and Shelly And jump on your belly And bust your ballon Aye! Tired, tired of playing the game Ain’t it a freakin’ shame I’m so… Let’s face it everything below the waist is kapput! [Lily, in _Blazing Saddles_](https://youtu.be/Uai7M4RpoLU) ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2018, 2:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celibacy-or-how-long-have-you-gone-without/597329/158 "2018-08-11T14:32:52Z")
> [@Leo\_Bloom](#): > > 😕 “FWB”? “Friend With Benefits” AKA fuckbuddy ---
**Author:** ![DavidwithanR](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3bc359/32.png) [@DavidwithanR](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DavidwithanR)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2018, 2:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celibacy-or-how-long-have-you-gone-without/597329/159 "2018-08-11T14:45:19Z")
> [@Robot\_Arm](#): > > 53 years, today. 53 years. That is seriously… wait, that word doesn’t fit here. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![HoneyBadgerDC](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/honeybadgerdc/32/1033_2.png) [@HoneyBadgerDC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HoneyBadgerDC)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2018, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celibacy-or-how-long-have-you-gone-without/597329/160 "2018-08-11T16:46:46Z")
I think I may be approaching my longest run right now since I have become an adult. My partner passed away 45 days ago. I currently have no desire for another woman or sex. I may have stated one time that after my divorce I went about 6 months without sex when I was 40 years old. I revisited the time frame from that period and I think it may have seemed like six months but in reality was more like 1 1/2 to 2 months. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celibacy-or-how-long-have-you-gone-without/597329.md?page=7) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celibacy-or-how-long-have-you-gone-without/597329.md?page=9)