# CelraySoda: Registered Fuckhat (a bit weak)

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celraysoda-registered-fuckhat-a-bit-weak/167107>\
**Category:** The BBQ Pit\
**Created:** [April 7, 2003, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celraysoda-registered-fuckhat-a-bit-weak/167107 "2003-04-07T17:37:32Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 2

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**Author:** ![Smeghead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f1d935/32.png) [@Smeghead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smeghead)\
**Post date:** [April 8, 2003, 2:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celraysoda-registered-fuckhat-a-bit-weak/167107/21 "2003-04-08T02:56:12Z")

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FTR, I personally doubt he was trolling from the beginning. I think he has reached the point where being seen as a troll would be preferable to admitting that he’s really this stupid.

You know things aren’t going well when you’re aspiring to become a troll.

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**Author:** ![White\_Lightning](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f04885/32.png) [@White\_Lightning](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/White_Lightning)\
**Post date:** [April 8, 2003, 3:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celraysoda-registered-fuckhat-a-bit-weak/167107/22 "2003-04-08T03:16:24Z")

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I don’t think he’s trolling. He’s just really, really dumb.

He (at least somewhat facetiously) started that GQ thread, but when things turned sour so quickly and he thought he might have made a boo-boo, he tried desperately to change the subject and/or have the thread deleted. When that didn’t work, and a Pit thread got started about it, he hied himself to Plan B, ie try to make like it was all a joke.

I say let him keep posting; he’ll learn what does and doesn’t fly around here soon enough, or he’ll expose himself as a bigger jackass than he has today and that’ll be the end of it. Two weeks from now nobody will remember this.

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**Author:** ![Michael\_Ellis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/977dab/32.png) [@Michael\_Ellis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Michael_Ellis)\
**Post date:** [April 8, 2003, 3:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celraysoda-registered-fuckhat-a-bit-weak/167107/23 "2003-04-08T03:55:08Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by White Lightning \*  
> \*\*I say let him keep posting; he’ll learn what does and doesn’t fly around here soon enough, or he’ll expose himself as a bigger jackass than he has today and that’ll be the end of it. Two weeks from now nobody will remember this. \*\*

Nah. Smite him.

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**Author:** ![Ringo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/779978/32.png) [@Ringo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ringo)\
**Post date:** [April 8, 2003, 4:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celraysoda-registered-fuckhat-a-bit-weak/167107/24 "2003-04-08T04:10:44Z")

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I’d suggest, as was noted by someone else in the now locked GQ thread, that we _not_ assume that the poster in question has truthfully linked to his own webpage in his profile.

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**Author:** ![Arden\_Ranger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b487fb/32.png) [@Arden\_Ranger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arden_Ranger)\
**Post date:** [April 8, 2003, 4:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celraysoda-registered-fuckhat-a-bit-weak/167107/25 "2003-04-08T04:11:47Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Smeghead \*  
> \*\*FTR, I personally doubt he was trolling from the beginning. I think he has reached the point where being seen as a troll would be preferable to admitting that he’s really this stupid.  
> \*\*

Of course he is really this stupid. He’s got an Hometown AOL webpage

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**Author:** ![Arden\_Ranger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b487fb/32.png) [@Arden\_Ranger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arden_Ranger)\
**Post date:** [April 8, 2003, 4:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celraysoda-registered-fuckhat-a-bit-weak/167107/26 "2003-04-08T04:13:05Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Ringo \*  
> \*\*I’d suggest, as was noted by someone else in the now locked GQ thread, that we _not_ assume that the poster in question has truthfully linked to his own webpage in his profile. \*\*

It matches his email address. Doesn’t that mean it has to be is?

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**Author:** ![DarrenS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/977dab/32.png) [@DarrenS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DarrenS)\
**Post date:** [April 8, 2003, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celraysoda-registered-fuckhat-a-bit-weak/167107/27 "2003-04-08T04:15:40Z")

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Maybe it’s [George](http://chroniclesofgeorge.nanc.com/).

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**Author:** ![Meros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8797f3/32.png) [@Meros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Meros)\
**Post date:** [April 8, 2003, 5:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celraysoda-registered-fuckhat-a-bit-weak/167107/28 "2003-04-08T05:38:46Z")

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\<hijack\>

**DarrenS** Tnat was one of the funniest things I have read in a long time…the scary part is a lot of the e-mails I get from my users look like those tickets :rolleyes:

\</hijack\>

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**Author:** ![CelraySoda](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e36b37/32.png) [@CelraySoda](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CelraySoda)\
**Post date:** [April 8, 2003, 6:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celraysoda-registered-fuckhat-a-bit-weak/167107/29 "2003-04-08T06:17:32Z")

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To be honest, yeah I did put my foot in my mouth. But no need for regrets, I got my vacation time and I’m going on a trip to lovely Canada. To clear things up for people;

1. Yes, that is my homepage.
2. No, that’s not the job I was referring to in the link.
3. Yeah, I tried to change to subject. (heh)
4. I also tried to say it was a trolling method to shut everyone up and make everyone happy.
5. No, I’m not an IT.
6. Not George (but that was one of the funniest things I’ve seen in a while.
7. Moderators aren’t KGB, the person from Tokyo is. He emailed my other job and they called laughing telling me not to talk to morons on the internet anymore.  
\*And as a special bonus: You people have to find more constructive things to do with your time.  
-M

“It’s better to live one day as a tiger than to be a sheep for the rest of your life”

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![CelraySoda](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e36b37/32.png) [@CelraySoda](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CelraySoda)\
**Post date:** [April 8, 2003, 6:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celraysoda-registered-fuckhat-a-bit-weak/167107/30 "2003-04-08T06:23:29Z")

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I also forgot to mention this is my last post in this thread. It’s been great but I have other things to do…your more than welcome to keep on posting, though. Have a great day. 🙂  
-M

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**Author:** ![Q.E.D](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/51bf81/32.png) [@Q.E.D](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.E.D)\
**Post date:** [April 8, 2003, 6:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celraysoda-registered-fuckhat-a-bit-weak/167107/31 "2003-04-08T06:31:24Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by CelraySoda \*  
> \*\*I also forgot to mention this is my last post in this thread. It’s been great but I have other things to do…your more than welcome to keep on posting, though. Have a great day. 🙂  
> -M \*\*

If I had a nickel, nay a penny , for every time I’ve heard _that_…

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**Author:** ![mhendo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mhendo/32/3159_2.png) [@mhendo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mhendo)\
**Post date:** [April 8, 2003, 7:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celraysoda-registered-fuckhat-a-bit-weak/167107/32 "2003-04-08T07:49:27Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by CelraySoda \*  
> \*\*To be honest, yeah I did put my foot in my mouth. But no need for regrets, I got my vacation time and I’m going on a trip to lovely Canada. To clear things up for people;
> 
> 1. Yes, that is my homepage.
> 2. No, that’s not the job I was referring to in the link.
> 3. Yeah, I tried to change to subject. (heh)
> 4. I also tried to say it was a trolling method to shut everyone up and make everyone happy.
> 5. No, I’m not an IT.
> 6. Not George (but that was one of the funniest things I’ve seen in a while.
> 7. Moderators aren’t KGB, the person from Tokyo is. He emailed my other job and they called laughing telling me not to talk to morons on the internet anymore.  
> \*And as a special bonus: You people have to find more constructive things to do with your time.  
> -M
> 
> “It’s better to live one day as a tiger than to be a sheep for the rest of your life” \*\*

and

> [@](#):
>
> **I also forgot to mention this is my last post in this thread. It’s been great but I have other things to do…your more than welcome to keep on posting, though.**

So, let’s recap. This moron:

- starts a thread asking about obtaining and illegally using computer viruses to commit sabotage
- spends a few posts defending himself for being an idiot
- asks the mods to close his original thread because he realized he was being an asshat, and wondered why everyone was flaming him for it
- claims that it is others who are being idiotic
- says he’s tired and has more important things to do
- returns 17 minutes later to defend himself again
- and then again to make a pointless post 7 minutes after that
- then returns a few hours later to pretend that there is actually a legitimate legal and philosophical question buried in his steaming pile of shit
- joins _this_ thread to tell people that they have no life
- informs everyone that they’ve swallowed his posts “hook, line and sinker,” thus implying that he’s been trolling all along
- gives a list summarising his position and his behaviour

and then, last but definitely not least,

- has the gall to tell EVERYONE ELSE that they should find more constructive things to do with their time, and that he was leaving the discussion because he had “other things to do.”

What a fucking asshat.

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**Author:** ![KGS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/90ced4/32.png) [@KGS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KGS)\
**Post date:** [April 8, 2003, 9:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celraysoda-registered-fuckhat-a-bit-weak/167107/33 "2003-04-08T09:20:32Z")

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“More constructive things to do with my time?” Hell, this is leisure time well spent, watching someone get raked over the coals for what was really just a stupid and forgettable comment. Sure beats reality TV.

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**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\
**Post date:** [April 8, 2003, 11:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celraysoda-registered-fuckhat-a-bit-weak/167107/34 "2003-04-08T11:58:53Z")

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This fuckwit moron also e-mailed me with a steaming load of bullshit about how he wasn’t serious, & how I should lighten up. :smack:

“Lighten up”? About flatly illegal conduct? About trying to get us involved in your ethics bankruptcy? This is a Board of principled people, buster brown!  
Oh, but I guess you need help with that concept.  
Here–

> [@](#):
>
> _From Meriam-Webster’s Dictionary—_ Main Entry: prin·ci·ple  
> Pronunciation: 'prin(t)-s(&-)p&l, -s&-b&l  
> Function: noun  
> Etymology: Middle English, modification of Middle French principe, from Latin principium beginning, from princip-, princeps initiator – more at PRINCE  
> Date: 14th century  
> 1 a : a comprehensive and fundamental law, doctrine, or assumption b (1) : a rule or code of conduct (2) : habitual devotion to right principles \<a man of principle\> c : the laws or facts of nature underlying the working of an artificial device

Have somebody look up “ethics” for you sometime, you crocodile-porking little shit.

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**Author:** ![elf6c](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c57346/32.png) [@elf6c](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elf6c)\
**Post date:** [April 8, 2003, 12:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celraysoda-registered-fuckhat-a-bit-weak/167107/35 "2003-04-08T12:21:13Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Q.E.D. \*  
> \*\*If I had a nickel, nay a penny , for every time I’ve heard _that_… \*\*

You would be posting from your fancy Yacht before having dinner at a fancy resturant consisting of their finest foods stuffed with their second finest\*.

But alas, such riches would take you away from us mere peasants so we can not let that come to pass. Sorry.

- somebody is bound to get this reference. . .

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**Author:** ![zweisamkeit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zweisamkeit/32/4360_2.png) [@zweisamkeit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zweisamkeit)\
**Post date:** [April 8, 2003, 12:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celraysoda-registered-fuckhat-a-bit-weak/167107/36 "2003-04-08T12:30:50Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by elf6c \*  
> \*_You would be posting from your fancy Yacht before having dinner at a fancy resturant consisting of their finest foods stuffed with their second finest_.
> 
> - somebody is bound to get this reference. . . \*\*

Lobster stuffed with tacos? 🙂

[sub]please please please let me get the first damn reply to this post![/sub]

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**Author:** ![elf6c](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c57346/32.png) [@elf6c](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elf6c)\
**Post date:** [April 8, 2003, 12:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celraysoda-registered-fuckhat-a-bit-weak/167107/37 "2003-04-08T12:31:54Z")

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Bing!  
😃

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**Author:** ![zweisamkeit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zweisamkeit/32/4360_2.png) [@zweisamkeit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zweisamkeit)\
**Post date:** [April 8, 2003, 1:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celraysoda-registered-fuckhat-a-bit-weak/167107/38 "2003-04-08T13:08:10Z")

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Woohoo!

😉

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**Author:** ![pravnik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/8edcca/32.png) [@pravnik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pravnik)\
**Post date:** [April 8, 2003, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celraysoda-registered-fuckhat-a-bit-weak/167107/39 "2003-04-08T14:49:40Z")

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Just to be clear, this would be a pretty serious crime. Check out this page from the [Department of Justice website](http://www.usdoj.gov/criminal/cybercrime/pierre-louis_Convict.htm). Anybody on the message board who helped you would be guilty as well, and you would also both be guilty of conspiracy.

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**Author:** ![Aslan\_of\_Narnia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecd19e/32.png) [@Aslan\_of\_Narnia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aslan_of_Narnia)\
**Post date:** [April 9, 2003, 12:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celraysoda-registered-fuckhat-a-bit-weak/167107/40 "2003-04-09T00:41:16Z")

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The Aslan2 Computer Voodoo curse(works the same with everything else)

1. Print off a document or take a file from computer you wish to destroy
2. Put said items onto your CPU. Write down the serial number of the computer onto yours. Bring out a sledgehammer.
3. Smash the sledgehammer into your computer a good six or eight times.\*
4. Finally, when you go to said cursed computer, you will likely find it destroyed.

I hope that helps, and gets you on your way to vacation time!

\*Do not hold me responsible to any damages that occur to your computer in said action.

[Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/celraysoda-registered-fuckhat-a-bit-weak/167107.md?page=1)