# Cesario:  shut the fuck up, you gross fucking asshole

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cesario-shut-the-fuck-up-you-gross-fucking-asshole/527954>\
**Category:** The BBQ Pit\
**Created:** [February 6, 2010, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cesario-shut-the-fuck-up-you-gross-fucking-asshole/527954 "2010-02-06T22:15:34Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 7

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**Author:** ![Lobot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ce7236/32.png) [@Lobot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobot)\
**Post date:** [February 7, 2010, 8:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cesario-shut-the-fuck-up-you-gross-fucking-asshole/527954/121 "2010-02-07T08:03:39Z")

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> [@Claude\_Remains](#):
>
> All af a sudden this is FOX NEWS? You fucks are running and screaming “FIRE”! cause I said that I have had thoughts? You think this is my daily routine?

AFAICT, your point was that we all have taboo fantasies, just that some are willing to admit to it, and they shouldn’t be persecuted for their refreshing candour.

That you’re surprised by the reaction to your post and its imagery suggests that maybe your insight into the human psyche is not as piercing as you think.

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**Author:** ![FloatyGimpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/floatygimpy/32/7750_2.png) [@FloatyGimpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FloatyGimpy)\
**Post date:** [February 7, 2010, 8:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cesario-shut-the-fuck-up-you-gross-fucking-asshole/527954/122 "2010-02-07T08:04:35Z")

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> [@Claude\_Remains](#):
>
> I never said “I want to jizz into a 5 year old” Thank you.

Sorry, my mistake. You want to “pump full of jizz”.

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**Author:** ![The\_Bith\_Shuffle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ce73a5/32.png) [@The\_Bith\_Shuffle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Bith_Shuffle)\
**Post date:** [February 7, 2010, 8:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cesario-shut-the-fuck-up-you-gross-fucking-asshole/527954/123 "2010-02-07T08:06:24Z")

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> [@FloatyGimpy](#):
>
> Sorry, my mistake. You want to “pump full of jizz”.

That’s the critical nuance you missed. For shame.

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**Author:** ![Kal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9de053/32.png) [@Kal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kal)\
**Post date:** [February 7, 2010, 8:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cesario-shut-the-fuck-up-you-gross-fucking-asshole/527954/124 "2010-02-07T08:07:01Z")

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Our new mascot?

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**Author:** ![The\_Bith\_Shuffle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ce73a5/32.png) [@The\_Bith\_Shuffle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Bith_Shuffle)\
**Post date:** [February 7, 2010, 8:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cesario-shut-the-fuck-up-you-gross-fucking-asshole/527954/125 "2010-02-07T08:09:07Z")

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> [@Kal](#):
>
> Our new mascot!

This is where the SDMB is going.

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**Author:** ![FloatyGimpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/floatygimpy/32/7750_2.png) [@FloatyGimpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FloatyGimpy)\
**Post date:** [February 7, 2010, 8:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cesario-shut-the-fuck-up-you-gross-fucking-asshole/527954/126 "2010-02-07T08:09:51Z")

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> [@Kal](#):
>
> Our new mascot?

Don’t touch me there, Pedobear!

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**Author:** ![Claude\_Remains](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/898d66/32.png) [@Claude\_Remains](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Claude_Remains)\
**Post date:** [February 7, 2010, 8:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cesario-shut-the-fuck-up-you-gross-fucking-asshole/527954/127 "2010-02-07T08:10:45Z")

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> [@The\_Bith\_Shuffle](#):
>
> I don’t know if you realize this, but the vast majority of the people on this board have never thought about anything nearly as bad as what you have (namely, sticking your schlong in a young girl). You want to know the most embarrassing fantasy I’ve heard had? Really? I’ve fantasized about being erotically assimilated into the Borg Collective by the Borg Queen. Alice Krige (from Star Trek: First Contact) just sends the most pleasant chills down my spine.
> 
> Notice two things. First, this embarrassing fact about me is not even one millionth as bad as the fact that you have fantasized about porking little girls. And the second fact is that I have never spontaneously shared my erotic Star Trek fantasies except here. You know why? Because nobody asked.
> 
> I’ll even go further and guess that nobody is going to ask me exactly what it means to be “erotically assimilated” into the Borg Hive. Nobody wants to know. Nobody would like to hear the details. But creeps like you and **Cesario** want to shove the gory details of your so-much-more-perverse fantasies onto this board. I don’t think we should have to stand for it.
> 
> Edit: okay, maybe I’m getting carried away here. But not by much!

You cannot speak for or on behalf of this entire board for one. And if you ever get a chance, get ya some pussy, Human pussy, 18+.

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**Author:** ![Antinor01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@Antinor01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antinor01)\
**Post date:** [February 7, 2010, 8:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cesario-shut-the-fuck-up-you-gross-fucking-asshole/527954/128 "2010-02-07T08:10:58Z")

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Lightening the mood **Kal** , or announcing that you’re into bestiality? 😛

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**Author:** ![Claude\_Remains](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/898d66/32.png) [@Claude\_Remains](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Claude_Remains)\
**Post date:** [February 7, 2010, 8:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cesario-shut-the-fuck-up-you-gross-fucking-asshole/527954/129 "2010-02-07T08:16:58Z")

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> [@Lobot](#):
>
> AFAICT, your point was that we all have taboo fantasies, just that some are willing to admit to it, and they shouldn’t be persecuted for their refreshing candour.
> 
> That you’re surprised by the reaction to your post and its imagery suggests that maybe your insight into the human psyche is not as piercing as you think.

I just wish that the Human psyche would step out and take a breather. People are scared fucking shitless to expose what they really think. Thank you JESUS!.

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**Author:** ![rolandgunslinger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/cdc98d/32.png) [@rolandgunslinger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rolandgunslinger)\
**Post date:** [February 7, 2010, 8:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cesario-shut-the-fuck-up-you-gross-fucking-asshole/527954/130 "2010-02-07T08:17:29Z")

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> [@Claude\_Remains](#):
>
> You cannot speak for or on behalf of this entire board for one. And if you ever get a chance, get ya some pussy, Human pussy, 18+.

Yeah! And not a 5 year old to “pump full of jizz”.

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**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\
**Post date:** [February 7, 2010, 8:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cesario-shut-the-fuck-up-you-gross-fucking-asshole/527954/131 "2010-02-07T08:18:09Z")

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> [@Antinor01](#):
>
> Lightening the mood **Kal** , or announcing that you’re into bestiality? 😛

I think they call him a **furry**.

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**Author:** ![Claude\_Remains](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/898d66/32.png) [@Claude\_Remains](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Claude_Remains)\
**Post date:** [February 7, 2010, 8:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cesario-shut-the-fuck-up-you-gross-fucking-asshole/527954/132 "2010-02-07T08:34:25Z")

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> [@rolandgunslinger](#):
>
> Yeah! And not a 5 year old to “pump full of jizz”.

Right cause acting on sick shit is wrong, say it with me now-“Acting on sick shit is wrong”- Thats right, good boy. But having thoughts is, Say it with me now- “human”- good. Now are you better than Human?

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**Author:** ![Sleeps\_With\_Butterflies](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bb73d2/32.png) [@Sleeps\_With\_Butterflies](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sleeps_With_Butterflies)\
**Post date:** [February 7, 2010, 8:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cesario-shut-the-fuck-up-you-gross-fucking-asshole/527954/133 "2010-02-07T08:36:33Z")

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> [@Little\_Nemo](#):
>
> I’ve had experience dealing with a number of pedophiles and I’ve found that they often feel compelled to talk about it. Even in situations where it puts them in danger.

It’s brain chemistry. Talking about it causes some of the same emotions as the act itself. They are, in essence, getting a small amount of sexual gratification from talking about it.

Just like if you think of something terrifying that happened to you, even years later, your body will react to those thoughts and emotions. Your body will produce cortisol and adrenaline and you’ll become anxious. Your heart rate will increase and you might begin to perspire or have trouble catching your breath.

If **Cesario** the childfucker (since I can’t call him a motherfucker) really is for real and not a troll I have _no doubt_ that dropping his shitbombs into any thread possible gives him a sick thrill. He’s talking and thinking about his favorite thing. Fucking little girls.

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**Author:** ![Mosier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ea924/32.png) [@Mosier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mosier)\
**Post date:** [February 7, 2010, 8:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cesario-shut-the-fuck-up-you-gross-fucking-asshole/527954/134 "2010-02-07T08:37:50Z")

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This thread makes me want to take a bath. I can’t believe I made it through all three pages. The borg thing sounds unbelievably squicky.

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**Author:** ![The\_Bith\_Shuffle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ce73a5/32.png) [@The\_Bith\_Shuffle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Bith_Shuffle)\
**Post date:** [February 7, 2010, 8:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cesario-shut-the-fuck-up-you-gross-fucking-asshole/527954/135 "2010-02-07T08:39:10Z")

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> [@Mosier](#):
>
> This thread makes me want to take a bath. I can’t believe I made it through all three pages. The borg thing sounds unbelievably squicky.

Really sorry about that, I was undoubtedly getting carried away.

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**Author:** ![Claude\_Remains](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/898d66/32.png) [@Claude\_Remains](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Claude_Remains)\
**Post date:** [February 7, 2010, 8:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cesario-shut-the-fuck-up-you-gross-fucking-asshole/527954/136 "2010-02-07T08:49:56Z")

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So I guess I should just not mention that I used to sniff my moms panties when I was a kid? 😃

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**Author:** ![Cesario](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ecae2f/32.png) [@Cesario](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cesario)\
**Post date:** [February 7, 2010, 8:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cesario-shut-the-fuck-up-you-gross-fucking-asshole/527954/137 "2010-02-07T08:52:39Z")

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I have never understood the appeal of the Borg Queen. I think that might have something to do with my having a fundamental objection to giving the Borg a face and a leader, when they were much more effective villains when their nature seemed to preclude such a being’s existence. An amoral threat always seemed so much more dangerous than an evil one.

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**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\
**Post date:** [February 7, 2010, 8:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cesario-shut-the-fuck-up-you-gross-fucking-asshole/527954/138 "2010-02-07T08:56:56Z")

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You know, I think the whole concept of suppressing certain thoughts gets a bum rap. It’s a socially effective psychlogical mechanism and its use should be encouraged.

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**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\
**Post date:** [February 7, 2010, 8:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cesario-shut-the-fuck-up-you-gross-fucking-asshole/527954/139 "2010-02-07T08:57:02Z")

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Some people are Klingons, while others are simply wilnots. Do us all a favour, Cesario, and shut up.

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**Author:** ![Richard\_Pearse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/richard_pearse/32/13144_2.png) [@Richard\_Pearse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Richard_Pearse)\
**Post date:** [February 7, 2010, 9:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cesario-shut-the-fuck-up-you-gross-fucking-asshole/527954/140 "2010-02-07T09:02:31Z")

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> [@Cicero](#):
>
> Are you absolutely sure you wish the phrase your sentence this way in this thread?

Yeah, I saw that before I posted and briefly considered re-writing it, but then I thought, “if they can’t parse that, then fuck’m, fuck the lot of’m!”

> [@Claude\_Remains](#):
>
> Right cause acting on sick shit is wrong, say it with me now-“Acting on sick shit is wrong”- Thats right, good boy. But having thoughts is, Say it with me now- “human”- good. Now are you better than Human?

No. Thinking sick shit is sick, acting on sick shit is criminally sick. You are sick and are trying to justify it by telling yourself you are the same as everyone else, you are not, there is something wrong with you. I don’t fantasize about anything I wouldn’t want to tell anyone about aside from the embarrassment factor.

Look, I get that some people have illicit fantasies. It’s not unheard of for people, including (especially?) women, to have rape fantasies for example. But that is so far removed from fantasizing about filling a 5 year old with “jizz”, it’s not even in the same galaxy.

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