# Challenge: New relativity limericks: **URL:** \ **Category:** The Game Room\ **Created:** [October 6, 2014, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/challenge-new-relativity-limericks/700560 "2014-10-06T16:35:01Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 12\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Find\_Friends](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c37758/32.png) [@Find\_Friends](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Find_Friends)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2014, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/challenge-new-relativity-limericks/700560/1 "2014-10-06T16:35:01Z")
[LOOKY HERE](http://www.freemathhelp.com/forum/threads/68513-Two-Relativity-limericks-Authors-unknown-to-me) The second one does not involve exceeding c. (In some versions of the first the lady is named WHITE.) Can you come up with any fresh ones? I prefer the second type. It would be great to have some to present at a colleague’s talk about Russell’s [ABC of Relativity](http://books.google.com/books/about/ABC_of_Relativity.html?id=QmnYCMXt3CsC) Thursday evening. ---
**Author:** ![OffByOne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/45deac/32.png) [@OffByOne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OffByOne)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2014, 12:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/challenge-new-relativity-limericks/700560/2 "2014-10-13T12:40:32Z")
There once was a fencer named Fisk, Whose speed was incredibly brisk. So fast was his action, The Fitzgerald contraction, Foreshortended his foil to a disk. ---
**Author:** ![Find\_Friends](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c37758/32.png) [@Find\_Friends](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Find_Friends)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2014, 6:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/challenge-new-relativity-limericks/700560/3 "2014-10-13T18:37:13Z")
Thank you! I had been pondering one about contraction, but without success. ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2014, 9:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/challenge-new-relativity-limericks/700560/4 "2014-10-13T21:19:35Z")
Despite what the _Enterprise_ “knows,” Their knowledge of speed-of-light blows. Poor Scotty, alas Does not have the brass To tell Kirk the ship never goes. (Lame, I admit) ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2014, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/challenge-new-relativity-limericks/700560/5 "2014-10-13T21:35:41Z")
“Warp two,” Kirk calls, rather sour, Hoping for ultra-light power. The gauge says 8_c_, But only for he: The damn ship goes eight miles an hour. (Not much better) ---
**Author:** ![Find\_Friends](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c37758/32.png) [@Find\_Friends](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Find_Friends)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2014, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/challenge-new-relativity-limericks/700560/6 "2014-10-15T15:35:05Z")
😃 I’ll take them! ---
**Author:** ![astorian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ad7895/32.png) [@astorian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astorian)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2014, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/challenge-new-relativity-limericks/700560/7 "2014-10-15T15:58:36Z")
Practically nobody cared When Al told them “E’s mc squared.” But now we have qualms About nuclear bombs. In fact, we’re pathetically scared. ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2014, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/challenge-new-relativity-limericks/700560/8 "2014-10-15T16:35:00Z")
Frank and Dave took a whole lotta time For the Earth to Jupiter climb. The problem, you see: It’s the wrong movie. Darth Vader? Four seconds. The slime! ---
**Author:** ![Asympotically\_fat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e47c2d/32.png) [@Asympotically\_fat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Asympotically_fat)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2014, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/challenge-new-relativity-limericks/700560/9 "2014-10-15T18:23:34Z")
There was a young man named O’Darrighty Who lived in a singularity, He said that it’s suprisin’ That the event horizon Prevents him from breaching causality. ---
**Author:** ![Amateur\_Barbarian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/59ef9b/32.png) [@Amateur\_Barbarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amateur_Barbarian)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2014, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/challenge-new-relativity-limericks/700560/10 "2014-10-15T18:28:14Z")
When physics seeks to get its wacky on But it’s highly of use Through a physical noose Instead of forward it goes backy-on A peculiar beast is the tachyon ---
**Author:** ![Dioptre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/278dde/32.png) [@Dioptre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dioptre)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2014, 10:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/challenge-new-relativity-limericks/700560/11 "2014-10-17T10:41:57Z")
She scoffed when I offered a lift “That car isn’t sporty”, she sniffed But look how it goes So fast that it shows Scarlet when viewed in red-shift 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Find\_Friends](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c37758/32.png) [@Find\_Friends](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Find_Friends)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2014, 11:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/challenge-new-relativity-limericks/700560/12 "2014-10-28T23:28:49Z")
Thanks to all who replied! 🙂